Traveling, so please have a read about directionally impaired Rick.
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 29, 2008
I Don't Think So
In the days before GPS...
My hubby and I don’t often fight. There has always been 1 exception to this.....being in the car together. Oh, he can make me so mad when he is driving.
He tells me to be his co-pilot and he hands me the map and then will say, “you’ve got to tell me where to go okay?” I tell him to turn right. He says, “I don’t think so” and continues on his merry way.
I am holding the map and I have the address who do you think is correct? Then after driving aimlessly in circles for 25 minutes he turns around and goes back to where we should have turned right and says, “We should have turned here” as though I never mentioned it.
Oh God, how he frustrates me in a car!
Now having told you this you should also know that he is hopelessly directionally impaired. Oh, that is so not an exaggeration. When he used to travel for work I always wondered how the hell he got off a plane in a strange city and ended up where he needed to be on time knowing that he is so bad at directions. He is a freak about being prompt so I know he was on time but how the hell he got there is anyone's guess including his. I now believe when he did arrive at his destination at all it should be considered another wonder of the world.
My hubby and I don’t often fight. There has always been 1 exception to this.....being in the car together. Oh, he can make me so mad when he is driving.
He tells me to be his co-pilot and he hands me the map and then will say, “you’ve got to tell me where to go okay?” I tell him to turn right. He says, “I don’t think so” and continues on his merry way.
I am holding the map and I have the address who do you think is correct? Then after driving aimlessly in circles for 25 minutes he turns around and goes back to where we should have turned right and says, “We should have turned here” as though I never mentioned it.
Oh God, how he frustrates me in a car!
Now having told you this you should also know that he is hopelessly directionally impaired. Oh, that is so not an exaggeration. When he used to travel for work I always wondered how the hell he got off a plane in a strange city and ended up where he needed to be on time knowing that he is so bad at directions. He is a freak about being prompt so I know he was on time but how the hell he got there is anyone's guess including his. I now believe when he did arrive at his destination at all it should be considered another wonder of the world.
Once he called me from Maine. He was there for work. He took a wrong turn. Imagine that will ya? He was on a road he said that was parallel to where he needed to be so he figured he'd get there. I asked how he knew that. A map he snarled. Okay then. (remember this is back in the day of mapquest and maps) He called to tell me that this road was gorgeous he had trees on the left and water on the right and on and on he went. He told me I was right he loved Maine (I sure do!) I said but if you're not supposed to be on this road why do you continue? Oh, I'll get there no worries. That would make me itchy. I couldn't be late for an appointment with a client and know I'm on the wrong road. He can't be late - EVER so I can't imagine him being so calm about this. But God love him he made it to where he had to be. I just shake my head at that man.
Now hubby is delusional about a lot of things. (for instance, he thinks I’m cute and he thinks he has way more hair than he actually does) But it’s important to note that he isn’t delusional about the fact that he is so directionally impaired. When I suggested he get a GPS when they came on the market he too thought that was a great idea.
Imagine my surprise when one day I get into the car and the woman's voice on the GPS tells him to turn left and he says to her, “I don’t think so”
He is talking back to this automated woman for heaven's sake!
For most of that trip, all I keep hearing is the GPS woman say, “recalculating” because he won’t listen to her either. OH MY GOD!
Then a couple of weeks later I get in his car and the GPS woman is now speaking with an Australian accent. I asked him why.
He answers me with a laugh, "because the other bitch was pissing me off".
I ask him if her lovely accent helps him to listen to her directions he responded with, “You’d think so wouldn’t you?”
Now hubby is delusional about a lot of things. (for instance, he thinks I’m cute and he thinks he has way more hair than he actually does) But it’s important to note that he isn’t delusional about the fact that he is so directionally impaired. When I suggested he get a GPS when they came on the market he too thought that was a great idea.
Imagine my surprise when one day I get into the car and the woman's voice on the GPS tells him to turn left and he says to her, “I don’t think so”
He is talking back to this automated woman for heaven's sake!
For most of that trip, all I keep hearing is the GPS woman say, “recalculating” because he won’t listen to her either. OH MY GOD!
Then a couple of weeks later I get in his car and the GPS woman is now speaking with an Australian accent. I asked him why.
He answers me with a laugh, "because the other bitch was pissing me off".
I ask him if her lovely accent helps him to listen to her directions he responded with, “You’d think so wouldn’t you?”
Meaning – NO. Now that made us both laugh out loud.
So now it’s a little less stressful for me when driving with him and with much less arguing.
I always know that we will get wherever we are going in a very unusual way with or without a GPS. I no longer take his not listening to my directions so personally. I mean if he talks back to an inanimate object and argues with her...
So now it’s a little less stressful for me when driving with him and with much less arguing.
I always know that we will get wherever we are going in a very unusual way with or without a GPS. I no longer take his not listening to my directions so personally. I mean if he talks back to an inanimate object and argues with her...
10 comments:
I am so thankful for the map programs on our phones now. My husband gets road rage when he gets flustered. Life is so much better now lol
That was so funny that he ignored the GPS and even went so far to change her accent. What an adventure your road trips must be.
I don't have much of a need for GPS. I will always look up where I'm going on the computer so I can pull back and get an overall picture of where I'm going. Then I will do a street view of my destination so I know what the place looks like.
I do use the GPS map, but like Mike I always do a street view so I know for certain! Back before GPS, I used to be the map navigator too. Not really my cup of tea. We had a horrible time trying to find a museum in Dallas....to this day, not my favorite place to visit!
My husband has great directional sense, but he's TERRIBLE at navigating. Tells me "go straight... or you can turn left... well, go straight..." etc. and I'm all PICK ONE STINKING ROUTE OR SHUT UP!
So glad for map apps.
Years ago when GPS were not around, my friend and I were navigating the English countryside trying to find Tintagel Castle. She drove, I was the navigator. Most of the time it worked well... except this one time that we ended up on a dead end road at the top of a cliff. I remember looking at the map and saying, "uh... I don't think this is it."
First time visiting; enjoyed reading some of your entries and the one about contractors having a review service for clients cracked me up but I think it could be a worthwhile thing to have with dealing with certain people :)
Had to laugh at this post of yours about directions. Before GPS or maps on your phone, I was the map reader too and I am not skilled in that way. I was never so happy when those services were invented and encouraged hubby to get one sooner than later. Made road trips so much more fun and less stressful.
betty
Love you Peg! You are a dear friend ♥
Linda, dear me whatever did I do to deserve that nice comment? ((hugs))
Betty, Welcome hope you come back from time to time. Weren't we all thrilled when we didn't have to navigate for our hubbies in the car?
Abby - oh that would drive me mad!! You poor thing.
It's -I have never done that I may have to try it though.
Mike - you helped me out of my GPS hell once so I know you know what you are doing. :-) how's that for butt kissing?
Patti - oh and they are, just had one this weekend. Adding hard of hearing to it makes it hysterical.
Julie I think the GPS has save many a marriage!
Rian, we laugh about being sent down an alley once and you got to the edge of a cliff. But I have read or seen on the news where people have died from the wrong GPS directions because they went off a cliff or were in a desert etc. Scary stuff.
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