2025

 HAPPY NEW YEAR!

While not the best of years, I'm dreading going to this next one. 🤞

I wish you all the best of everything in 2025!

(Hopefully, I don't fall between the two)

Well, That's Over

I have a good friend in Ohio who sent me a three-part Instagram reel with a couple about our age. She sent it to me because she said she showed it to her hubby, and he said, "Omg, this is Rick and Peg!" 

Meg told her husband she was sending the 3 reels to us to see what we thought.

I asked why she thought of us. I THOUGHT I knew but just in case.

She said, "They laugh and tease and it's funny like you two. It's just how you two act." Hmm...

"No one gets mad you just always laugh. "

Oh, we get mad trust me. But not often.

I was going to embed but I don't know these people and I probably shouldn't post their stuff without their permission. What are your thoughts on that? Their profile is public but still not 100% comfortable with that.

The husband and wife are at the kitchen table and he says, "These are the things your mother has said to me that I could never say to her"

She giggles. (ok I get that part)  

Now some of the things he says she has said to him I have said to Rick like, "Please change your pants your ass looks saggy"  

Of course, she tries to support this comment but she can't, it's just funny and true. And yes, I have said this to Rick about a certain pair of jeans. 

"You're as dumb as a stump."  

Her: "Well, you bought 4 fake leather jackets off the street that were all the same and you took the man to the ATM and you said because he was Italian you trusted him"  He was laughing so hard and nodding because he knew it was true.

We both watched all 3 parts and we just laughed.

Rick said, "Now these are fun people and could be friends"

Yep, these are like all the people we left behind.

Rick asked, "Are they hiding down here? These are our people." 

"I think so Rick but then again, they are from the north so maybe it's a regional thing I don't know. Everyone here appears so damn cranky."

_________________________________

This morning, as I attempted to clean off the coffee table, I saw a pink pill on the floor between the sofa and the table. I picked it up, and Rick asked what it was. I said," It's not an Rx medication of yours, but it looks like maybe a sudafed." 

He looked at it and just popped it in his mouth.

I, of course, flip out. "Richard is this where we are now? just picking pills off the floor and ingesting them without knowing for certain what they are?

"Yes, it is where we're at.  What the hell, we already have yellow caution tape around our home."

I had to laugh. So true. Me, being the wreck I am. He, having a bad cold that has him behaving like a sound machine. Honk, cough, sneeze, honk, clear throat, and on and on and on. At one point last evening while watching a movie we had to mute the TV because of his noises. He gets the creeping crud at the gym and then brings it home to me. Yipee. 

At least I'm not as sick as he is. For once I got a break.

___________________________

The surgeon called that I was referred to but they can't see me until the 14th. Geez. Well, what's another 3 weeks. I'm getting sleep now so that helps a great deal in my mood and dealing with the pain. 

And lastly, if you have Apple TV, please watch Shrinking.

My God for no other reason than Harrison Ford.

I have never been a big fan of his, however, I adore him in this show. 

Both Rick and I think this is his best work.

In season 2 he is wonderful!  At his Thanksgiving turn to say what he was thankful for I teared up.  I have never seen him in this type of role. At 80-something I think this is his best work. From what I am reading others including him think so too. It's such a good show!

Harrison plays a therapist in a group. they have all become friends of sorts.

Harrison is a big ole grump. But, he has a heart of gold and is a softy. 

He is what my husband calls me, A toasted marshmallow. Can appear crusty on the outside but a big ole soft marshmallow in the middle. 

He also is coming to terms with his diagnosis of Parkinson's'. 

This is a nuanced character and God I love him in this show.

So that is my recommendation for you all to watch this weekend.

You won't be disappointed. 

Season 2 as always is a bit better but you need Season 1 to lay the groundwork.

One more holiday to get through. 

Holidays

On this Christmas Eve, 

I wish all of you who celebrate Christmas, a very Merry Christmas!

How Was Your Friday?

Grab a cup of coffee, or your favorite beverage and listen to how a bad Friday rolled out for me.

Thursday I had a Dr. Appointment with Dr. Li the neurosurgeon at his Spine Pain clinic.

I was to talk about how well the big injection made me feel. 

(no better at all!)

I just had to endure that pain for nothing is how I see it. And pay for it. 

Thursday morning I could not function at all. Now here is TMI...

I had to get down the short hall to the bathroom. I couldn't walk I was trying and I was concerned I wasn't gonna make it. Rick was outside in his shop.  I was crying, "walking" and squeezing so I wouldn't pee myself.  

Too late.  I then crawled to the bathroom. Took a shower. I sat on that damn bench in the shower and cried. God, I am so tired of this. 

I am so frustrated with this. 

My phone was on the floor when I crawled into the bathroom.  After my shower, I got my phone. Took forever. I got in the 'chair' and tried to chill. 

I am doing the breathing I do for pain as Rick walks in. He suggested I cancel my appointment since I can't even get dressed with even his help. 

I call the Dr.'s office and tell them what's going on. They had no openings until next week. Okay, I just can't come today unless you have something later in the day. Nope, they did not. Okay book it for next week.

  

The next thing I know the doctor is calling me. We are going over my pain.  He tells me that we are skipping the next step and jumping into the spinal cord stimulator. He explains why and I agree. He gives me his cell phone number if I need anything. He tells me to text or call him.  Wow that was nice. He is getting me in at 2pm Friday. I will meet with Dave from the company that makes these. Like Rick's pacemaker they are involved as well. They discuss the device and they are the ones who will keep in touch with me to see how it's working. They are just not neurosurgeons who do the implanting.

Remember now, I am given no pain pills. I am out of my mind.  But when the dr. called me back I asked for pain pills. He was going to give me steroids and I said NO. I want pain pills.  He called in for 30 Percocets.

Finally, it's only been since March. 

Rick drove me to the doctor's office and I had him come in. 

I wanted him to hear all the information on this new gizmo. It is temporary to be sure it works. If after 5 days it does it will be surgically implanted. You see, the wires are inside but the device is on the outside during the test period to be sure it is helpful for me.

The first part of my appointment was how this works. They have gone over this with me many times but I get why they did it again. This time I had the wires shown to me in a demo with a fake spine. I understood what was being done, and how it HOPEFULLY would help me as well as the do's and don't. It basically stops the pain in my brain which I find interesting.

 

I can not bend, twist, or basically do anything other than just sit after I have this done. 

I can't shower either because of this being outside of my body with the temporary one. It can't get it wet he was adamant about.  So it's whore baths for a week.  Guess I am not seeing people. Here comes the stinky gimp!😀

I had to lay on my stomach as they injected me with something they claimed was a numbing agent. I do not know what it numbed cuz I felt it all. OOh boy did it burn. I told him halfway through that I was feeling everything and asked if I should be feeling all this.  No, he says and he gave me another shot. Whew. He apologized and on he went.

He went up the left side for a long time. He was getting jammed due to the vertebrae not having enough room for him to get through. He kept hitting the bone. The pressure feels like a semi-truck is sitting on your back.  I know I whimpered at one point. I asked for Kleenex. My face is in that hole on the table, my nose is running, and tears are falling.  

There is this big sheet thing over me. I grab a piece of something that felt like a velcro belt of sorts on this table. I grabbed them and squeezed when I needed. i think Dave notice and he got on the floor and put his hand under the sheet and said, Grab my two fingers if you need to.  Oh I needed to.  He was so kind. 

The dr said, "Peggy we are going to try the right side. I'm very sorry"  

I couldn't believe it. I had to endure this again?

I could feel him pushing this and it was doing the same thing. He was shaking me and the table now.  Finally, after 1 hr of extraordinary pain, they said they couldn't do it.  He apologized. They showed me the issue which I could see plain as day on the films. It looks fine until you get in there. I saw the problem. I couldn't be mad at them for trying. But I sure as hell went through a lot to get nothing in return.

Getting me onto my feet was a treat. I got dressed and went to the outside room where Rick was. Dave was apologizing (the spinal cord dude) He said he has seen this several times. No big deal he says, it will just have to be done in the hospital.  

Dr. Li called the neurosurgeon who he works with when this happens.

That neurosurgeon is to call me on Monday.  We shall see. Being Xmas week I am doubtful.

By 8pm Friday I felt like my back had been kicked by a horse a few times.

Yeah, that was fun. 

I can't sleep on my sides due to this. So I sleep in a chair.  I couldn't sleep in the chair because it hurt against my back. 

Now for some crazy ass reason, this brought me to giggles.

Should I sleep standing up I ask Rick.  

He laughed and said, "Oh fun - Peg tipping"  

(if not familiar with cow tipping this makes no sense to you)

Damn Rick you're cruel. I am tired, hangry, and in pain, and yet I now have the giggles about what the hell my life looks like right now. Of course, Rick doesn't help any with his comments. Smart ass is funny. Laughter does help with pain even if it is all in my head. 

Rick fetched me a big bed pillow and I got all situated and felt comfortable. 

I kept moving in the chair I guess because at one point Rick said if you are that uncomfortable take a Percocet. 

So I cut one in half and took it.  I don't like the high feeling I get from these. I know, I know. I wanted some pain relief I just wish it didn't make me dizzy and feel like crap. So when it kicked in I closed my eyes.  I don't get why people enjoy them. But guess who slept for 6 hours straight?  Ah, if felt so good.

So here I am on Saturday just doing what I do. I have the regular pain. It is not bad. My back feels like it would be black and blue but Rick says it's not.  It just feels like I've been run over. 

Friday I heard the doctors discussing with Rick as I dressed, the 2 things they will probably do but until the surgeon looks at all my films, etc they aren't positive. I hear a laminectomy and inserting this SCStimulator.

I have had laminectomies I really wasn't ready for back surgery just having this device implanted.  

So until Monday, I do not know what is going to transpire.

I hope the end of the pain is near. I want my life back.

From my Chair

I'm in a mood today.

Discovery

 It all started harmless enough.

Rick sent me a reel. It was a woman doing pull-ups from the back. She had no top on. The caption was titled, Topless Day at the Gym.

Rick was heading off to the gym this morning and says, "Wonder if this is Topless day at my gym"  

I told him to take his shirt off.  He didn't find it as funny as me.

Now everyone sees this reel and says, "How do you know it's a woman?"

Well,  I can see that it is, but even if it isn't, let the guy have his fantasy I say.

Then he tried to whistle for some reason on his way out the door and couldn't whistle.

He came back inside.  

"Hey, my whistle is broken. "

"What?"

"I can't whistle, listen." He stood there like a fool trying to whistle.

Well, the damn fool can no longer whistle.  He is distraught by this and I find it funny because one does not need to whistle. Trust me I've done just fine never being able to whistle. It didn't hinder me in any way I tell him.

He has so many issues from the stroke and this is a concern?  

He also has a lot of issues of numbness around the left side of his mouth, and he is having issues with his throat, etc from the stroke. 

Because of all this we assume this is stroke-related since he was a strong whistler before the stroke.

But I must tell you that his concern over his lack of ability to whistle seems to bother him more than it should to me.  He just returned home. Still talking about his inability to whistle and still trying. He is in the kitchen as I type this blowing air.  OMG.

I've been around this man for 37 years. I know him. He is now going to walk about and attempt whistling for days.  

Gosh, Lucky Me.

My week

 Well, that didn't last long.

The miserableness of this back pain is in full force. It showed me a day and a half of life without wanting to off myself. I liked it and wished it had never happened if it couldn't stay.

I go back next week. I am afraid of the surgery but it's all that I've got...I think.

We shall see. I see the murderer of the CEO of United Health Care stated that he has debilitating back pain. Gee, I bet sleeping on a cot in a cold cell isn't helping his pain. 

The good thing about all this misery is that I can see some of my shows without waiting. Bad Sisters is so damn good.

Shrinking is one of the funniest shows on TV. I never gave a hoot one way or the other about Harrison Ford. but I adore him in this show.  

Oh, it's not funny, like, ha ha ha, but the things they say to one another are how my friends and I speak to one another, so I find it funny. I just wish they didn't dole out the episodes one by one. I want to stream all episodes.

Then to make my week complete it's been 24/7 football.

I dislike football for all kinds of crazy reasons. But this need to take over the airwaves on 5 channels Thursday through Monday is just crazy.

Biscuits, guns, and football. 

The former New England Patriots coach was named the new UNC coach here in Chapel Hill. First, it was, will he or won't he? Then it was he will.

Yippee - let's have this on TV for 5 hrs on all networks including PBS.

Who cares? 

I know nothing of this man except he won Super Bowls. 

He looks like a dick.

Then I saw his girlfriend. He is a dick.

He is 72. She is 24. 

Now that he is only making 10 million a year instead of 25 will she leave her sugar grandpa?  

What in God's name does a 24-year-old woman see in a 72-year-old man?

Aside from money, what do they have in common? Does she help him with technology? Does he show her how to use an analog clock?

I don't get it. 

Rick said maybe she's in school at UNC and that is why he was interested in moving here. That made me laugh. When I googled her she was a "cheerleader"  That is her occupation at one time it stated. High school?

So apparently this is rare. Apparently, this is a big deal but isn't there something called the Big 10 and wouldn't a man of his 'pedigree' go to a big 10 school and not UNC?  Don't laugh at me. I don't know much about football and its workings.

All I know is now this will be all we hear around these parts.

I have another busy week that I will have to find a way to plow through.

I am sure you are all knee-deep in presents and wrapping paper.

All the things you enjoy this time of year.

This is my least favorite holiday. I long for it to be over already.

But yet I fear 2025 and don't want it to show up. 

I don't think it's going to be a good year.  I hope I'm wrong.

Well geez, that ended up being a bummer.

Let's stop with a funny instead.

Saturday Morning Admission

With pain lessened I am able to do more.

Rick noticed and commented that, “I’m smiling and talking more too. And if I’m honest you’re less cranky.”

I raised one eyebrow pretending to be upset by his words. Of course I wasn’t, I knew he was right.

“So what you’re saying is apparently pain makes me a tad grumpy, so adding that to my sparkling personality and I guess I’ve been a joy.”

“Yep, that’s it.

“That’s what I thought you meant”🤣

Update and Friday Meme Drop

You may recall I left the doctor I was seeing when he told me it would be a one-year wait to Duke's pain clinic. Nope. That is inhumane. Besides, I think he was ghosting me because he didn't know how to fix me. Being he was a surgeon it's best I find that out now.

I went to another Pain Clinic for Spinal Pain intervention. (he does other things too but mostly this.) This doctor is another neurologist. He felt they were injecting me in the wrong place. Great thousands of dollars out the window

He really felt he could get this. I have a bulge on L1. It is covering 50% of my spinal cavity. It is pressing on all these nerve endings giving me severe pain, numbness, and did I mention eyes rolling in the back of your head pain?  Now I've had sciatica. This is nothing like sciatica. I don't want sciatica but I'd prefer that over what I have been dealing with.

Rick drove me to the clinic office because I feared the drive home if this worked.

It worked. OMG, the pain. It smarts with the numbing agent. It smarts when they insert the tube, but when they put in the medication I went through the roof. Instant tears. At one point as he was moving the needle I was making noises that I couldn't control. It was so awful. The nurse was trying to hold my hand but I was squeezing the table. I apologized after one yelp and he said he gets big ball players in here crying like a baby so I didn't need to worry. I actually heard that before.  Another story for another time.

When it was done I was about to relax. I felt my whole body tense but I couldn't stop it. Man, I wouldn't wish this on another person. Well, maybe one. 

After I got off the table I couldn't walk without wobbling so they had me sit down. The doctor walked me out to the front office and I scheduled a 2-week follow-up. I have always been told it will get better and better over 2 weeks.

I hope they are correct.

I told Rick in the car that as soon as he injected me in the correct spot I almost went through the roof. I knew he was in the right spot because he was causing me great pain in the areas of my pain. I know that seems confusing but I knew it was in the right area and that made me happy through those tears.

When I got home I collapsed in the ugly chair. I slept for 4 hrs. I awoke to being able to get out of my chair with minimal pain. I even stood up straighter. 

On any given day my pain on a 1-10 scale is a 10 or higher.

After this shot, it was a 5-6 and I can honestly live with this pain. It's inconvenient, and it's not fun but I can do this if I must.  

If this does not take we can try the spinal cord stimulator should Medicare ever approve it or have surgery.

They apparently don't like to do surgery on an L1. When I asked why I was told it was such a small area. Not the space as there is on my lower back. I said even if they only got 1/2 of it I'd be in 1/2 the pain, no? 

I don't know I just want out of pain.

I asked Rick to put a pillow over my head if I must live in a 10-15 pain level.

He said he wouldn't do it because he is too pretty for prison.

I bet I have a sibling that would.

😀

yes, see above.

Got Snow?

I hope your holiday was all you wanted it to be.

Do you have snow? Thankfully, NC does not get snow to speak of. I am all for that. My family in Erie, PA, has been under 5 feet of snow, with more on its way. It looks so pretty from here, but I wouldn't want to deal with it myself.

Hence why we went south. :-)

Lake Effect Snow storms with thunder are typical weather for my hometown.

The first winter after I met Rick was his first winter in this town. We were walking to our car when it thundered. 

Rick asked, "Did you hear that?"

"Yes"

"It was thunder"

"Yes, I am aware"

"I've never heard thunder during a snowstorm!"  He was excited like this was so rare.

"It does it all the time, what is so new about that?"
"Well, it's new to me"

That is when I learned that is not normal in all parts of the world.

In other news since I've been gone from the blog.

I watch a show on Netflix called "Is It Cake"  

I found this in the wee hours of the morning when Rick first had his stroke.

He was in the hospital and worry wart was up in the middle of the night.

When Rick got home I showed him this show. He found it funny but was then fascinated by it. Then we see some of our friends who are into this with their kids. I guess kids just love this show. Then I heard a comedian say his wife and kids watched it and he rolled his eyes and said, "Not for me, sounds stupid." 

The kids made him watch and now he too loves this show.  

I saw they had a holiday version of the show so over Thanksgiving, we watched that show.

When it was over Rick said, "You always make me watch these cake shows, now I want cake."

"Hey mister, I don't MAKE you watch anything!"

He laughed and said, "Well between this and the British Baking Show it makes me want cake you know?"

"Oh I do but since I can't have cake..."

"Hey, I can."

"So you're asking for cake?"

"Was that too subtle for ya?"

"Alight, what kind of cake do you wish mister?"

"Aged Beer Cake"

"You going to leave it alone for 7 days?"

"I promise!"

"Hmpf"

Now, this Aged Beer cake is so simple. 

The difficult part is letting it sit for seven days without cutting or eating it. Yeah, that has always been his issue.

He wanted this one for one year, and I made it for his birthday—of course, the week before his birthday so it could age.

After the 7 days, it is VERY moist, dense, and decadently wonderful.

I wrapped it in saran wrap/cellophane. 

The following day I see a piece is missing.

So I wrapped the cellophane-wrapped cake in aluminum foil. 

2 layers may help the big mouse from getting to it.

I knew I'd hear him try to get some cake that way.  

Two can play this game, mister.

The next day I  hear the foil and yell into the kitchen, "I hear that cake opening are you sure you wanna do that?"  

He had a big belly laugh and yelled, "I can't believe you booby-trapped the cake!" 

"yep I did"

Fast forward to December 2024.  I made the cake. 

I wrapped it in saran wrap. I had it under a cake carrier. 

It was left on the kitchen island. 

The following morning this is what I saw.

I think we have a rat in the house.  

I will be lucky if the cake makes it to 7 days.  

As he says, "It's far better after the 7 days but it's damn good now too"

********

Have any of you watched the Ted Danson show on Netflix called A Man on The Inside?  It is based on a true story but this is fiction of course.

I didn't think I'd like it but I did. It's light, it's funny and it was perfect for the holiday weekend. We laughed a few times just because the character is as good with technology as Rick is. He found that funny. He saw himself. 

I was going to attempt to explain the events at this Senior Living Community but just watch the trailer, it will do a better job of explaining.

I just hope and pray I don't ever end up in one of these high school dormitories. But I am old enough to know better than to say, never. If I've learned nothing in 60 years it is to never say never. But a gal can 'hope'

Happy Thanksgiving

 

Random Goings On

I think you all know when I'm not around I'm having a difficult time.

Yesterday and today are pretty darn good so I am attempting to move about the world and do what I can. 

While being in a prone position I saw a bit of TV.

Granted can't always focus but enough to notice a few things.

I watch 2 shows that are not American. They are Irish and British.  

I know it is said they speak English.  

But, let's face it, there is a big difference between English and American.  

I learn a lot, sort of like Rosetta Stone for TV dummies. 

I must use the closed captions as well. 

I love the show Bad Sisters. I learned the word Gee means vagina.

Who knew? I heard the line spoken and didn't get it, so I just shrugged and continued with the show. Then I saw the lead actress and writer of the show, Sharon Horgan, who is marvelous, on the Stephen Colbert show. 

She explained some of the Irish words in the show and what they meant. Oh my goodness. And they toss around the C word like it's just a fun word like balloon. It makes me laugh.

Then there is the British Baking Show. Ooh, I love this show a great deal.

But half the time I have no idea what they are baking by the word used until I see it. I wish there were translation subtitles. Then I see the dessert and go, Oh that's just cream puffs. Rick asked, 'Why do they say sponge, that sounds so unappetizing'

I explained it was not a kitchen sponge, it was cake. They say, sponge when they mean the cake itself. He shook his head and left the room.

So who says I'm not doing anything? I got myself some TV learnin'.

Similar to book learnin' but for dummies.

So many of you mentioned what would happen if I had said on my mental assessment that I was not happily married. I guess they'd let me die.

No, . seriously I think it may have been about my care after surgery. They kept asking me about my support system. It's Rick and sadly only Rick. So maybe they thought he'd off me while defenseless if unhappily married. Who the hell knows?!

I have not watched the news since November 5th. 

Gee, is anything new going on?

🤣🤣

Mental Assessment

While they are trying different things on me like a guinea pig I had to have a mental assessment for getting a spinal cord stimulator.

I do not understand why, and apparently no one else does, because when I ask, I am met with gibberish, and their eyes dart away.

Then I was told this was necessary for Medicare, so I had to have an assessment for whatever reason.

Rick told me to say and do all the opposite of my natural instincts.

He was giving me scenarios of things I would answer but only in the bubble above my head. I am mature enough to not say those things in polite society.  But oh he was making me laugh, he knows me too well.

Then in all seriousness, he asks me, "Isn't this on video/zoom kind of thing?"  

I said it was.

He said, "Oh, then you'll be fine, with a wave of his hand as if to dismiss me. You look like a person in extreme pain if they don't give you a yes then they are blind and mean."

Thanks?

I had my damn assessment and the questions were weird. 

My favorite was.  "Are you happily married?"

"Yes, I am happily married." 

"Is my husband happily married?" 

"Yes."  

I burst out laughing and she smiled and said, "Is that funny?"  

"Yes, you ask me if I am happy and then if my husband is as if you expect a different answer and I did indeed find that funny. And YES he too is happily married." 

I so wanted to add, 'because I told him he was happy.' 

But again I refrained. She laughed and said, "I see that but I have to ask."

The whole thing was just damn weird. At the end of these stupid questions,

she said she saw no reason I wasn't a great candidate for the surgery. And she gave me a thumbs-up. Hopefully, the approval will be sent to Dr. Li and then I see what is next.  

One of these things has got to work right?

Au Pairs and Nails

 I've mentioned in the blog that I have a love for Dateline, 48hrs, Crime Shows of most varieties. I have also mentioned here how I sometimes watch the DC local news channel 4 just to see what is happening back "home"

I have been following this story up there about an au pair/nanny and her employer killing the wife/mom of this household. It's now unfolded to be the au pair was having an affair with the husband. There is this whole story unfolding regarding who stabbed who, the innocent handyman they called in and killed to make it look like he was the killer, etc. They aren't telling us everything because the husband will be on trial soon. The au pair has already been convicted I think. It's a crazy story.

I said to Rick this is going to be a Dateline episode you wait and see. 

I think it will be on one of those shows very soon. 

This takes place in Herndon, VA in Fairfax County.

This was next door to us when we lived up there. 

When we first moved there, everyone we met had an au pair. I remember coming home from a neighborhood get-together while we were all brand new in this community. The community was still being developed and some of the first people living there had a community center gathering to meet their neighbors.  I told Rick that all the women were sharing au pair information, such as what agency, what country, etc.  "What the hell is an au pair, but a nanny, right?"  He said he thought so. So we concluded that we were the white trash from the other side of the tracks who say, nanny and would use neither.

We had a good laugh about that.

I assumed an au pair was cheaper because it's a young person coming to a new country.  It reminded me of a foreign exchange student. But boy these women hiring sounded dreadful to us. I wouldn't wish to work for them.  

I want to call these girls and say - run, run for your life!

We just laughed it off. 

Now an au pair in Herndon has done the thinkable. C'mon, my old hairdresser's au pair ran off with her husband. Seems to be the thinkable vs unthinkable. But killing one's employer I would definitely say falls under unthinkable!

Look for this on a soon-to-be broadcast on Dateline, 48 Hrs, 20/20 etc.

In other news I think about that is totally useless- I saw this woman Sunday on CBS Sunday Mornings. Please tell me how one does anything with these nails. She reminded us of a woman we knew who worked at a bank.

I was watching this woman, Cynthia Erivo, who plays the bad witch in Wicked. She was talking using her hands and I heard nothing. I could only focus on those talons. Wolverine like nails. I do not get the appeal.

How do you take care of yourself in the bathroom? How do you do your makeup and not poke an eye out? How do you open anything, type, etc.

Do not drop anything because you won't be able to pick it up. 

I do not understand the appeal because it doesn't look pretty either. 

But that is me and my preference.

In 1989 there was a woman who always helped Rick at his bank. 

He talked about her super-long nails all the time, he was fascinated. 

Oh, not by her nails looking so nice, but by how she could do anything with those on the tips of her fingers. He was fascinated by how she handled the money and coins. He would ask me things all the time. Things I could not answer or didn't wish to.

One day he asked her, "How do you wipe yourself with those nails?"

I turned and walked out of the bank. I was mortified.

Thankfully this woman laughed a big loud hearty laugh and said, "No one has ever asked that but they dance around it."

OMG, she kept laughing. Then she said, "It's easy"  That was her answer.

Good for her. That shut up Rick.

When Rick got to the car I told him I could kill him. He told me how she laughed. I said I heard it as I was getting to the door. He said she wasn't angry and repeated it all to me 

I'd have scratched his eyes out. What a rude friggin' question. To him, it was, "inquiring minds wanna know"  No, inquiring minds need to keep it all to themselves.

Oh Boy!

This was sent to me by a friend in Europe. (a previous boss)

Happy Weekend.

Black Wednesday

Voting

The lines for voting on the days of Early Voting were very long lines, people spoke about being there for an hour or more. I knew Rick could not stand for 1 hr comfortably and neither could I.  So the poles opened at 6:30a. I wanted to be there at 6:30.  Rick did not share my concern.

I was ready to go and he was moseying around.  In other words, driving me crazy.

C'mon, I kept yelling. Then I opened the back door - I could not see my garage or my car in the driveway. For that matter, the table and furniture on my back deck I could not see because the fog was so heavy and dense. Rather cool to see it like a cloud over my patio especially if I didn't need to find my car and drive somewhere.

Now normally I love fog if I'm at home and don't need to fly or drive. 

But not today I cried to the heavens.

So back in the house, we decided to go. No sense in killing ourselves.

We waited until 8am. It was somewhat foggy but overall it was driveable.

Rick reminded me if we couldn't drive others couldn't either so the lines will be short. He was right.

We get there and a woman immediately comes to our car and asks if we would like a republican ballot to review. I said, "Good Morning. No, I think I'm fine"

She turned around and said to another person doing this type of work, "I have a feeling everyone is gonna be fine."  Not 100% sure what she meant. We have a couple ideas, it was just weird. Otherwise, all the people who spoke to us were great and I was impressed.  

We get inside and do our civic duty. We get home, have a second cup of coffee, and now anxiously await. I fear the next few days.

I saw a meme which of course I can't find now, but essentially it stated that the last time the LA Dodgers won the World Series that donald trump lost an election. 

If true, hell it was so worth my team chocking. 

Gym

Rick was at the gym on Monday. He said it was crowded with a lot of new faces.

As he was getting to his favorite machine a young man asked him if he could ask him a question. Rick said sure. (TYM = the young man)

Looking at Rick's T-shirt he asked, "When did you have your stroke, sir?" 

Rick: 18 months ago.

TYM:  Wow, you're doing great. I've been watching you. Squeeze my fingers.

Rick: laughs but damn if he doesn't do it.  He said I thought maybe he was going to fart like a squeeze-my-finger joke. 

TYM:  Wow you have got great strength. BTW, I am a cardiologist working at XYZ. 18 months huh? Good job at getting your strength back.  

Rick: It's why I come here. Now if only the left leg would cooperate.  

TYM:  Hey you are doing great, just keep it up. 

And he walked away.

Rick said it was such a weird exchange but the young man was nice. Rick referred to him as a kid as he was telling me this but when he said he was a cardiologist (albeit new) He couldn't be that young....just to us older folks.

He does meet some doozies at the gym. But overall he loves everyone he comes in contact with. They yell his name in the front when he walks in like it's cheers. Yes, these are all women who do this.  The women all flirt and tell him he's looking good and that type of thing. Last week they gave him treats. Told him not to tell anyone where he got the brownies.  Even at age 69 he has women flirting with him. Just like I used to see in 1987 when he was single and just my friend.

Honestly.  🤭

My Husband has begun sending me Memes

We changed all the clocks except this big one in the living room/entry area.

It's very large and heavy. Then we had to move all the furniture in front of it. Oh, what a royal pain. I have one arm and Rick has one good arm so we tried our damnst and we laughed a lot but didn't get the damn things down to change.

As we were repositioning ourselves, Rick suggested we just know it's an hour ahead and leave it for spring when we change the clocks back it will be perfect.  I laughed and gave up with him. I really thought if we just lifted the bottom I could reach the thingy to change the time. I couldn't and I couldn't hold it alone to have Rick do it. It was honestly all comedy at this point. 

So now we have to remember it's an hour ahead and you know we won't and there could be issues. I will try this clock again when Rick isn't home. When he goes to his workshop I may try it by myself.  He gets so frustrated of late so I'm going to try and hope I don't break this big clock.

Speaking of ole Rick he sent me this last night after I fell asleep. 

My husband loves to send me reels.

I saw it this morning and it made me laugh.

Gee, I think I need a nap. :-)

He sent me this one with a note that said, "Hey they know us!"

I couldn't disagree. 

I said is this your way of late of saying sweet nothings? 

It's not working buddy.

He laughed and said, "No, but c'mon is this not you and me?" 

"Yes, I guess so."

So now I need a meme that says the happiest women are the ones married to a man who is beyond the definition of stubborn, has severe honking/clearing throat issues that drive his partner bonkers, and thinks he is funnier than he is.  He nodded and said, "Damn right"  Okay glad we squared that away.

Clocks and Memes

Now that I no longer have a dog changing the clocks isn't as difficult for me.

But I still don't think it needs to be done. I wish it would stop.

Don't forget to turn those clocks back!

November already

 Well, I'm back

..tee hee

One of my hubbies crushes. 

It's 5am and I can't sleep. I am not in pain. Well, I have pain but on a scale of 1-10, it's only a 4. I can live my life with a 4. No, just can't sleep. Took my pills before bed thinking it may help me sleep but no it did not. I rolled over, removed Rick's arm, and made my way into the kitchen.

I emptied the dishwasher and washed some dishes. The fun things one does when not in pain. Rick has picked up the slack and honestly makes more work for me but I am not saying a word. He is trying. I just do it when he isn't in the room so he doesn't feel bad. But some days I have to say something like where the hell is the platter we like for the BBQ? 

As I have shared here before. When we lived in that haunted house I just couldn't do that basement. I never felt alone. Neither did he. But he was braver than me and would go down there. I'd hear him talking to "them"

I told him if he did the laundry while in this house that when we moved I would do the laundry for the rest of his life. I've kept my promise until we moved here. First, it was chemo that made me so weak and tired. He was running out of underwear and did a load. I lifted my head from the bed and said, "I'm sorry" 

Then he did a load of laundry and forgot to put it in the dryer. When he remembered they were stinky as you know they get after sitting in the washer for 2 days. So he learned his lesson, now that he is doing them all over again. He came and told me this one and I laughed.  Oh, I've done it before, it's okay. Then he left a load in the dryer for days. They were so wrinkled and he came into the room and said to me while holding his T-shirt. Do you iron my T-shirts?  Heaven's no I tell him. He asked what my secret was for them always being smooth out of the dryer. Ah, I see what you did. How long were they in the dryer? 3 days he tells me while squinting. He knew that was it. I said they get wrinkled with just sitting in a pile. You have to take them out when that damn bill dings. Oh, he says. Well, I am well enough now so I will do all the laundry and if I need you to lift something up I will ask okay? Deal!

All of that is fine. But the kitchen and the bathroom he is clueless and blind.

He makes a PB&J and then leaves the PB on the cutting board. Then he leaves the jelly on the counter and the mess he has made along with the knife he used. He then got himself a cup of ice water and he got water everywhere (an issue with our shitty ice machine) But does he clean it up?

No, he rubs it with his sock. 

I walk into the kitchen and see everything everywhere so I put it away.  

I see the spices on the counter and wonder why he didn't put those away from last night's dinner?  I can't reach this so I get my stool and I step up there and he comes in yelling at me. I told him I was just putting them away.

"Oh yeah", he laughs.  Then the dishwasher. He unloaded it. 

Ah, you are all saying how wonderful that he does that. No. No, it's not wonderful, then we play Find Where Rick put the bowls, platters, zester etc. The cheese grater was nowhere to be found. When you ask Rick where he puts them he says he doesn't know. He has dishwasher amnesia. Yes, google it, it's a thing. (that I made up) 

After he cooks dinner because he has been making dinner more, he shows the world what we've had. Salt on the counter, the range, the floor, the island. Sauce spilled on the floor and the mat in front of the oven. 

Over by the island, the floor is littered with all the ingredients in his meal. 

If this was Crime Scene Kitchen like the TV show, everyone can figure out what he made by the mess all over the kitchen. This is when I missed my hoover, Izzy. She would be on all that dropped cheese, bread crumbs etc on the floor. Now I have to sweep and clean.

The bathroom is a new one. He used to get so angry at "all my shit" on the counter in the bathroom. So when we redid the bathroom I suggested we got for a dresser with all drawers. That is what we did. We cut the legs and after the framing, you would never know. It was perfect. A drawer for even my blow dryer. NOTHING on the counter but my toothbrush and soap etc.

He was so happy. We all had a place for our things. 

Now we have a shitty vanity in the master. 3 drawers and those dreaded deep caves that hold things that you can't get to. It becomes the dark abyss. I do not like these cupboards in the bathroom. I need drawers!

(I bought a pottery barn dresser that was dented on the side, It was so cheap and we knew that it would be against a wall so it wouldn't be seen and not damaged enough to cause any issue except the store couldn't sell like this so they sold it at a Walmart price which was perfect.)

So now that I have a New Rick his side of the vanity is overtaking mine. 

I went into the bathroom a few days ago to brush my teeth and hardly had room. I took a picture and went into the kitchen and showed him. He laughed and said," I've turned into you"  I pointed to my side of the vanity. He said, "Well you have turned into old me."  

Then there is the garbage can in the bathroom. He changed the toilet paper and put the old empty roll ON TOP OF THE GARBAGE CAN. There is a foot pedal to open it. It's not hard. You don't even need to get your pretty little hands dirty mister. I left the roll there to see how long this would sit there before my head exploded. Several days later it's still there but now with an empty floss container added to the top of the can. That did it. 

I put them INSIDE the garage can. Then I asked Rick what was so hard about putting the toilet paper roll IN the can instead of On it. He said he didn't even realize. WHAT? Now he begins to laugh which infuriates me and he says, "Well I've had a stroke" and he laughs more.

I told him that was a year ago, and not buying that anymore for excuses mister.

This new Messy Marvin Rick is so annoying. Oh the kitchen stuff is just as he was before the stroke, it's just worse. But messy Rick is new. There are so many things that are different since the stroke. He realizes them as well. Especially his food. What he loved he doesn't anymore. 

I am happy to have him alive. So Rick 2.5 is a man I need to learn.

ADD alone is new and wow how people deal with that one, it's tough.

We can be talking and then it's like Squirrel. 

We talk a lot about what he is feeling etc. We get down and dirty with the changes and discuss how he feels because I want to understand.

His physical issues bother him but his cognitive issues bother him far more.

He sent me a meme from his stroke survivor group and he said, this is how my brain feels a good deal of time. After he sent this I cut off the top of the heading but you get the idea.

I see him working hard to adjust so I try to do the same.

As long as we keep laughing about it all we'll be okay I think

He knows he frustrates me and I know he gets frustrated for the way he now thinks. So we just keep talking so we understand how this all makes us feel and then how to deal with it the best we can. For us, it tends to be laughter but not always. But God how laughing at yourself is healing.

Oh and before you ask me why Rick 2.5 and not 2.0 allow me to explain.  

My first husband was named Rick (high school sweetheart) so my family always called this Rick, Rick 2.0.  The new updated version and he'd laugh. 

My father thanked me so he didn't have to learn another man's name (having 5 daughters was daunting to the man, he didn't get the names right for his daughters so...) 

So now I call him Rick 2.5 because he is a helluva lot different than Rick 2.0. But the essence of Rick is still there. So I'd say I was blessed.