Wednesday Tid Bits

I was to meet a blogger this coming Friday, the same one as last time that got canceled. But now this Friday is going to be another 'storm" here so she canceled. 

I hope it's just like the last 'storm' and we got nothing. 🤞

I don't much care about said storm. 

I don't have to go to work or drive in this if I don't want to. 

I  know they don't treat the roads well here so it's best to stay home. 

But damn, I think meeting her will never actually happen.

I am knee-deep into my office organization since I finally painted it. 

I am going to leave you with memes cuz I am still cleaning out all of these from my phone/computer.  I have decided that I am getting so damn good at painting that I could get a job doing this if I wanted. IF I wanted. I don't want to. But I sure wish I could paint without any objects in the room. That would really make me happy. In fact, it'd be orgasmic. 

Rick came into the room and didn't see me. I was sitting on the floor behind the bookcase painting the trim. He said, "Margaret are you in here?"  I laughed and told him where. He said I could never fit back there why didn't you call me to move the bookcase. Because I could fit and it was no big deal, besides you were in the workshop. I knew I'd fit. He then explained that this is why he can't paint. I laughed and said, "nice try but you can paint well, you just don't want to paint and help your old wife"  

He laughed as he walked out of the room and said, "Okay that too." 

He left quickly so I didn't get him to do the edging at the ceiling. I was using a step stool. I needed one more step. I was on the top step and on my tippy toes to do the ceiling area. I was too lazy to go out and ask for the ladder. 

I got it done. Hell if I didn't have these God-awful popcorn ceilings I'd have painted that too. Next year - those are going!!!!! POPCORN CEILINGS ARE THE WORST! I will pay someone to do this. I saw how it is scrapped and automatically goes into this vacuum attachment so it doesn't make a mess. I don't have that so I will pay someone to do it for me. The entire friggin' house. I hate them, did I tell you that? 😁

 

When anyone who is reading this sees the last episode of the last season of After Life, please share. I would love to discuss this. We felt it ended one way, I've had others say another way. Aah, it's driving me nuts. I hate that kind of ending. Especially when the show meant so much to me.

Happy Hump Day!

Updates.

We only got rain this past weekend. We had some ice for a few hours, but it went to the 40s so it was then just wet. The north of us got a dusting of snow and lots more ice and loss of power etc. We missed it all as I thought. But this Friday is another storm coming. So we shall see. Can we get that lucky a 2nd time? I hope so.

Some updates. 

I got a kick from your Sex and The City comments. My husband watched this with me. The first few episodes he'd go to another room and then one evening it was on and he came down the stairs and the women were in a sauna and as you know, you don't wear clothes in a sauna and he saw boobs and naked women and he said, "Why aren't I watching this?"  

And ever since then he'd watch it with me. I knew a lot of men who watched it with their partners. So I thought it was funny that you all referred to only women who watched this. 

Here are some memes and photos that I need to get off my computer.

What else is new right?

 Patti, I know you love Bill Engvall, this is for you.

Just me?

Boy, I liked this!

Scary eh?

Paul, this below is for you. We refer to these as pinnies, this one is a vest, but very similar and it is reflective so we can be seen at night time while walking our dog.

I loved this. And what isn't Alex Borstein great in?

This is Rick's first attempt at the yarn bowl. Once I told him that Barbara mentioned this he googled them to see what they were. But he didn't have the tool, a damn $10 tool, to make the swirl. He tried to do it freehand and as you can see that sucked. Again just a practice. I saw the 3 square pieces of wood that this started as. I kept saying this will be round and a bowl? He glued them together. That is another mistake you can see in the next one.

Okay not this one - this side is good.

See the glue line towards the bottom here? It looks black. That is a mistake. But it was 3 square blocks of wood glued together that made this. It may be just practice but not bad for 1st time. Guess who ran out to buy that $10 tool and he got it for only $8 on sale? I swear Rick has as many tools in the workshop as any ole Lowes or Home Depot. So the next one will be better I am certain. 

This week we are back at the boxes in the garage. We have been here now 2 months and 2 weeks. We are on phase II of the unpacking. Bringing in things from the garage and storage area. I will be moved in by the 1-year mark if it kills me. I have two more rooms to paint. The 3rd I am not doing. I will pay someone. Or do it much later. Probably pay someone if I can. I like to paint a lot, but even I am getting sick of it.  

Do any of you watch the Netflix show After Life with Ricky Gervais? 

I love everything this man does. Everything. My God, we watch this and laugh and cry. We pass the kleenex back and forth. I also learn a lot of words in British English that we don't say. Some of which I knew but a good many new ones I learned. 

I did not care for its ending and neither did Rick. If you have never seen this do yourself a favor and watch all 3 seasons. It is so damn good. I think it's sad, but it's funny too. It will pull at your heartstrings and then make you laugh like a damn fool. If you've seen the newest season to the end what did you think of how it ended? I just wanted to hug Ricky Gervais at the end.

I hope you are all warm and safe. 

I saw that Toronto had a real blizzard as did my Great Lakes region where my family lives. I do not miss the snow. It is so pretty to see the 24 inches of snow from afar. But I am glad to not have to shovel, snow blow, or be in that kind of cold weather. It's fun to visit, but I just can't do that kind of weather anymore. Funny how that happened to me. I absolutely used to love winter, snow, cross country skiing. I never minded shoveling either. When I first moved away from there I missed it terribly my first holiday. Christmas without snow felt weird to me. (or for that matter not freezing cold) But you'd be surprised how fast I got over it. To be honest it shocked even me. There is no going back now. I am a 4 season gal who likes winter being 40/45 degrees. 🥶

My Unsolicited Review of Just Like That

I was a loyal Sex and The City Fan. I watched them all. Even the 1st lousy movie. 

It was so bad I did not watch the 2nd movie. But I was happy to see them return to HBO in Just Like That.

No longer partying and having sex with strangers or all the 20/early 30s angst. Now all the women are in their 50s. I would hope they aren't still partying and doing the crazy things they did in their 20s.

Apparently, this got the majority of the people upset that the main character is mourning the loss of her husband and can't fathom dating. Another is in a miserable marriage and one who is happily married but has issues with her youngest daughter.  All typical things one goes through as we age.

While the clothes are to die for as before they are more adult and less tutu wearing as Sarah Jessica was known to wear when she was young. One had white hair, one of her friends said that she should color her hair, one doesn't care about her hair. The typical things when girlfriends are together that are discussed.

I am thrilled they are showing grown women and not girls anymore. I think it's great they are showing growth. But everyone in the reviews or other women who watched that I have spoken to are all upset that it's not the same.  It shouldn't be the same, they are in their mid to late 50s. If you are the same person doing the same thing you did at 28 as you are doing at 58 well, I'd be a bit sad for you. Everyone must have growth. 

I love them all behaving as 50 something. I love the clothes. I love the truthfulness and I love the comedy. When Charlotte was telling a story about her daughter coming in while she was on her knees. Her friend Carrie said, "Oh my God you still blow your husband, was it his birthday?"  Well that cracked me up. And of course all the women at the table howled.

I like the show. I feel like when I tune in I am with my girlfriends. No topic off the table. We say everything and anything and we support one another. 

Just like these 3 do. 

Is there anything more sad than a man or woman behaving the same as they did in their 20s? The only thing to me is the women who wear the same clothes, hairstyle and makeup from when they were in their 20s. You know them, a teddy bear sweatshirt on a 55 yr. is ridiculous. Or that baby blue eye shadow that was the thing in 1968. You know who you are. Don't do that. Time to move on just like these women have.

So poo-poo to the rest of the professional reviewers who are looking for 20 somethings doing their thing again. It's time to grow up and they did. This is a show about 50 somethings (rich 50 somethings). I can relate to this show just as I could with the first incarnation when I was 41 and first watching it. I was older than their characters but I wasn't that far off from that life when I was single. And they show the ups and downs of female friendship in such a realistic way. The love, the arguments, everything.

So that is my review. Pfft to the movie reviewers who want young Carrie. But I noticed most were men. They don't like watching 50-year-old women. So there is that aspect as well. 

If you were a Sex and The City watcher in the '90s and early 2000s do you watch the new incarnation? What are your thoughts?  Love to hear!

Oops!

This morning while watching The Today show a woman who by the way was dressed appropriately, vomited on tv.  Did any of you see this?

Yes, she tried to stop talking, and then she bends over and you hear her hurl but thankfully the cameraman turned away. 

Now it's not nice to laugh. But, Rick looked at me and we began to laugh. Then we were empathetic. The poor thing, we saw her struggling to talk, then a cough, and then there she blows.
But man was she a trooper. We saw her fight it. What could the poor thing do? Wonder if she may be pregnant?

Well, that was a first for her and us. We sure are seeing stranger things on TV news/weather these days don'tcha think?

After yesterday's post, I just had to share!

Fun Day

All the locals here have their panties in a twist because we are to get freezing rain. I am not sure why this is a big deal when the high that day is 41. That tells me it will melt. The rest of the week it's mid-40s.   

A neighbor asked, "Did you see all the conversations on Next Door? They say to stock up on essentials, isn't this for a 24 hr period? Why are they all in a tizzy?"  

Rick and I agreed that is just what they do in the south so listen with a grain of salt. We have underground power lines so power should be fine and while trees falling is an issue we are aware of it being an issue because of the weather people talk about it non-stop. The man moved here before us from New York state. (I want to say Rochester or possibly Syracuse area) He said he's never seen anything like this. Rick said, "Welcome to the south. If it isn't sunny and humid they panic. When we first moved to DC it was the same thing"  

The man said, "so global warming should make them happy"  

We laughed and went on our way. (we were walking the dog, and this is how we have met most of our neighbors)

Not having sidewalks and walking at night is crazy. Izzy has a collar we use at night that lights up a fluorescent green light. Rick wears a fluorescent pinny as well so he is seen. But we find it a tad bit too adventurous for us. I wish Izzy didn't need walks. And the fact that she has never ever had a yard to go in she won't do it in our yard. God knows we've tried. Pee yes, but nothing else. 

Another thing we've noticed here is the news. The anchors are 12 or 90. Nothing much in between. Because this is a small market I would assume the 21 yrs old are using this as their first gig before moving on and up. 

But the thing we laugh at is that there is no news here and yet it's on all damn day. They say the same thing over and over again. 

I had the TV on while painting one day. Noon news. Same as the news cut-ins from the Today show. Nothing new happened. Then from 4p to 7p is news. Each one is the exact same thing. WHY? Nothing happens here. It's a sleepy town of less than half a million people. Sure a crime here or there or a fire. Usually, racial related because I am in the south remember. But otherwise - NOTHING. Most of the time they spend it on national news. 

If something urgent were to happen they could cut into the programming. 

In the meantime, if you want national news you have cable news like CNN etc. Why must we have hours of news? 

Living in DC the local news was national news. We would have some hometown issues addressed but for the most part, our local news was your national news. But being that the metro area is 6.5 million it is certainly different from this area. But we still don't need 4 hours of news no matter where you live! We do not need to have all this negative shit seep into our psyche. 

We have had some real giggles with some of the anchors here locally. 

One young woman was dressed in the morning like she had just come from the club. It was such inappropriate dressing that Rick noticed. He just sat down with his coffee when he said, "Oh my, do you think she just rolled in from a night out, this is her walk of shame outfit?"  

I laughed and said maybe it is. She is super young and super cute but never ever dresses for the job, she dresses like she is a stripper. 

Wrong job.😉You'd think the station would help groom her. 

Do you know that in travel school I had to learn how to dress, shake hands and all this crazy shit. Travel school not only was what I wanted to learn, the GDS, or computer systems used in the travel industry, but I had to endure flight attendant shit, learn aircraft and sitting and proper dressing etc. Silliness that I am certain is not part of your AA degree in travel and tourism any longer. Rick being in HR used to tell me about people who dressed poorly in interviews. Some he wondered if they were too broke to buy a nice jacket or dress/pants for the interview or they were clueless. As I told you once a young man had a brand new sports coat on for his interview. He had a tag on the outside sleeve. Rick didn't know if he knew it was to come off or he wanted it there to return the jacket after the interview. He told me that it distracted him and he so wanted to ask him. Finally when the job interview was over, it was his 2nd. The young man was offered the job by Rick. 

Then Rick mentioned the tag on his arm. Rick said when I was your age I didn't know what I am about to tell you (lie to make him feel better) but that tag on your sleeve should come off if you are keeping it. But if you need to bring it back leave it on.

The kid said, OMG I didn't know. He was a kid from the foster care system who was able to get into college but no parent or adult could teach him this. He thought it was like the tag on the back of his Levi's. Rick said if you are keeping it, you'll want to remove it. If returning leave it on there.

The young man said, "I was keeping it. But even more so now that you just offered me the job!"  Rick interviewed a lot of kids out of college and he was always teaching them things. (like the girl with the sexykitten email address remember that one? oh my)

In my hometown I recall at the end of the newscast in the small print below it would state the clothes courtesy of such and such a store. That told me that this channel gave her a budget for clothes or in exchange for advertising she got clothing help. (when I had a business we did trades with the CBS, ABC, NBC channels in exchange for advertising dollars)

While we are on dressing we began to DVR a show that is on at noonish called My Carolina. It shares what is going on in the area. We have gotten a lot of good info from this and fun things to visit and do. But the two hosts dress badly. Again Rick brought this to my attention. I didn't wish to say it out loud. I said that it could possibly be pandemic-related. Maybe they used to dress better and wash their hair but they too are in pandemic clothing. 

Rick laughed at me and said, "yes that's it, their dirty hair is because of a pandemic" How are they able to stay in front of the camera. It is no exaggeration to say their clothing has a place but in front of the camera it does not belong. A county fair perhaps. Hanging with your friends, not even nice enough to wear out to dinner or go to a club. The 4H would work with their attire. 

Rick is correct they both sometimes have such greasy hair it is gross. Yesterday the one had on jeans that stopped above her ankles but not evenly. Perhaps having one leg one length and the other 2 inches longer is a new style I am unaware of. It looked like she just did a remote at a pig farm. Her jeans were filthy. Her socks out of her boots did not match, perhaps that is a new hip thing, I don't know. One white, the other blue. She was wearing nothing blue so as an old gal I assumed it was a mistake but it could be a new fad. 

Her shirt looked like it had been pulled out of the laundry basket so she could wear it. It was so wrinkled it was almost funny. I've done that in my young days. But I would then either iron it or put it under a sweater. 

Their clothing is so bad you can't help but notice. As I mentioned yesterday Rick is not observant at all but he comments every time he sees them. He finds their dirty clothing and dirty hair and unkempt appearance to be detracting from listening to them. He makes me laugh about this.

Is this because we are old? Is this because this is a small town/city? Is it pandemic related? Is it because we live in a city/town that is far less sophisticated than anywhere we have ever lived? (not counting hometown) 

Inquiring minds want to know.

You can't blame the anchors or young people if their station allows them to look like that on camera. But if they wish to move up would they use these reels to do so? Because I don't think that will help their cause to get beyond this little town. 

There was a young man I'd see locally doing field reporting. When I first moved to DC Metro I thought he was so young and cute. Then he made it to the local news anchor but at 4am. Then he made it to anchor on the local evening news. Then next thing I know I saw him on The Today Show. He made it. But it was the show that is on before the regular Today Show. Now I see him on NBC all the time in anchor positions. He made it to the big time. But when he was working locally he was always dressed for the part. In the field if he was interviewing someone after a storm, he'd be dressed in storm clothes. When he was on a 3am he was in a jacket but no tie. When he made the Today show he dressed in a suit. 

As my close work friend would tell me, dress for the part you want. I never forgot that. 

I think it is just the lack of sophistication here. It's all-new. The city is growing leaps and bounds and I think in 10 years the population will double and it will be a million people here. Because most are coming for the higher education type jobs in the medical field, IT, research, google, and amazon. Most are no longer toiling in the tobacco fields & the area is changing quickly. That is what upsets the locals in my hillbilly county. We Yankees. Now the new folks moving here can be from Texas but if you can put a sentence together without a double negative, you are called a Yankee. 

It was stated in a local real estate magazine that in the last 10 years the home prices have risen 98%. We saw a lot of that when we spent a 1.5yrs searching homes down here. By the time we could retire it was an entirely different realty market here. The average home price here was 225-250K when we started, when we could move it was now 400K+. 

I look forward to the growth for the fact that more sophistication will come and fewer guns. But it's still North Carolina. I don't expect miracles.

In the meantime, I wanted to give a shout-out to Barbara who suggested Rick look into making a yarn bowl. Neither of us knew what that was. So Rick googled it and said he had some wood that had warped or something and he could use that to practice & try to make this. I saw some of it yesterday. He wasn't finished yet. He was struggling with the loop for the yarn. But when it's done I'll show you. It's a good practice piece for sure. Not something he'd sell but something to learn from.

Sun is shining and it will be warm no matter what locals call it. Right now at 11:22am it's 50 degrees. I think that is swell for any day in January. 

I'm off to go play in this warm city and enjoy Friday Fun Day. 

Are you Observant?

I'll start with I notice everything. I've been told most don't. It's not something I try to do. I guess I just do. Once on Oprah, my friend called me from another city to tell me to turn it on and watch. She'd call me after the show she said. 

A detective was on and said how difficult it is for people to notice things around them. Why sometimes witnesses get things wrong. 

Oh okay, that is why she called me. Then they did some tests. 

They set up a room and you walked through and left through the TV of course. They had questions. While in the room a man ran through. 

Never stopping, just ran slowly through the room. No one could tell you the color of his shirt, what he was wearing, his hair color let alone all the things in the room. I noticed all but one thing. I was taking the test at home as suggested and writing down my info. When Melanie called me back we compared. You see I tell her she is not observant and she calls me a freak. So when she said she barely noticed the man walking through did you get his hair color and clothing? Yes. I missed something on the coffee table. 

We chatted about the show and when we hung up she called me a freak again. It's been a long standing joke.  Later that same month we went to this woman's house to pick something up. Melanie hates this woman but it was something we had to do for the organization we were volunteering for. When we left she made some snide comments and I said, "well if it makes you feel any better Little Miss Perfect's floors were gross as were her baseboards. And she's not a real blonde." Melanie laughed and said we were in the foyer for less than 5 minutes at best how do you see all this shit. I said I don't know. You didn't see the gallery of photos on the wall? And as we were standing in the foyer trying to keep our wet boats on the slate floor and not the rug I looked down and saw the dirt and dust." She laughed and hugged me as if I said these things on purpose for her to feel better. 

Then she told me she wants me at a crime scene. But am I observant or Melanie just isn't? I am not certain I am any more than anyone else. 

In fact, Rick and Melanie are identical in this area. I am normal. 

When we moved here we put things in a place and now that we've been living with it, some things are getting moved. The living room has been a difficult one for us. 

My furniture is big because my place was far bigger. So now I have big pieces that we've moved every which way to set up the living room. We are down to one leather L shape sofa and one ugly chair and a coffee table and side table. I can't afford new so don't suggest that to make me have an easier time. (the sofa sold Rick wasn't comfortable on and it did have a shorter length of the seat.)

At Thanksgiving, I wanted to try moving this in another direction. I said to Rick I wanted to try having the sofa over here and the chair over there. He said go for it. We lived with this arrangement since Thanksgiving. We liked how it worked far better for the chair but everything else made it closed off. But to be sure we wanted to wait for at least a month of living with it to see how we felt about it. A week ago Rick said, I think the first way is better what do think? I said the same thing. But neither of us moved it back at that moment. Then last night I was up again with insomnia. So at 2am I rearranged the living room quietly. After I was done I sat on the sofa and thought, wow wait until Rick wakes up and sees this!

Rick woke up after me. I was feeding the dog in the kitchen when he walked in and said good morning, kissed me, and high-tailed it to the coffee maker.

He never said a word about the living room. He just walked into the kitchen without walking around the sofa. How can this be? Now I know he's been awake, I heard the flush in the bathroom and since he was up I walked into the bedroom and he was brushing his teeth in the master bath. He looked up and nodded his head.  My point of this is to show you it's not like he hasn't been up for a bit. 

It is so different that he didn't have to walk around the sofa this morning surely he would notice this. I waited.

Then he took his coffee and sat down in his ugly chair. He still does not notice the chair is now on the opposite side of the room and not in front of the front window. 

How does he not see this? No wonder this blind man thinks I'm cute.

Finally, I'm about to burst and I say, "notice anything different?" 

"No."

"Richard for God's sake look at the living room."

He turns his head and begins to laugh and said, "this is when you bitch about me not noticing anything isn't it?"

"Ya think?"

He goes on, "OMG I'm an idiot."

"Yes, I won't disagree."

"When did you do this?"

"2am."

"You didn't need help?"

"I did fine. I put movers on the feet of the furniture and just moved it around. Being quiet was the hard part" 

Then he laughs again and says, "how the hell did I not notice?  I was too groggy I guess."  

This coming from a man who if I had no shirt on would notice if groggy, or would awake from a coma. The man who wakes up singing and whistling is not groggy. He just doesn't pay attention.

Would you have noticed if your chair was in an entirely different spot and your whole living room was entirely different? If your walk into the kitchen was different would you not notice? Yes, he missed all of these things. 

So who's observant Richard? Oh no, not you my love, not you!

Delusional

This was written and ready to go before the computer was shut down. 

Promise I'll be back tomorrow.

________________________

We watched my husband's favorite show on Monday, The Price Is Right. 

The woman arrived on stage and proceeded to tell Drew that she was 4 months from retiring, she just got married and got a new house she proclaimed all proudly on stage. 

I honestly would have guessed her for 75 at the youngest.

Hmm...my age, huh? As I am thinking I am quite delusional Rick pipes up - 

He looks over at me and says, "Damn, You look good babe."

I laughed, "Ah thanks but I have one eye Rick that can see 20/20 and I have a few mirrors. I can see that is not exactly true"

He laughs and says, "Damn, what a catch, a one-eyed, old gray-haired lady. God, I'm a lucky fella."

The little shit was now laughing a little too heartily as he walked away. 

Offline

No computer after I type this. I hope to be back up tomorrow. Fingers crossed. 🤞

I just can't write on my phone.

Have a nice Monday!

Bowls

I've got nothing so I thought I'd show you some wood pieces Rick has been playing around with. He got some free wood so he thought he would practice with it. 

We have an enormous pile of free wood that he has to practice. 

He wants me to be sure to tell you he knows these are filled with mistakes and that he is aware. 

He's so worried ya'll would think he sucks and doesn't know it. 

I still look at this as - he had a big square chunk of wood and it became this.

Cool! mistakes and all. It's not a big deal. 

Last night it required some wood porn on youtube so he could see what he did wrong. So when his arm is moving again he can try it again. 

Each day he comes in with a new one and shows me all the errors and tells me how to fix them as if I am going to do that. He makes me chuckle. 

This one is walnut with an inlay of corian. He wanted to see if they would adhere and damn if they didn't.

This is what he calls a live edge. You've probably seen live edge tables.

I think this will hold things on my desk. :-)

Back to ole walnut and Corian again - see the mistake on the right?

that blue is the reflection of the TV

While I see all his errors I still think about how he just watched this on youtube and then began turning wood into something is just not something I could ever do. 

Sure he works with his hands and he can build things etc but make a bowl? 

I love his charcuterie boards and his cutting boards. But let's face it those are rectangular boards and while the shapes are different on the charcuterie boards they are far more simple than a bowl (she says without having ever done either) 

We have a friend with a catering business and she loved Rick's cutting boards so much that he gave her one. She then asked for 2 more and bought them. Same with the charcuterie boards. She had Rick make her some in several sizes for her catering business. He has that mastered so now it's bowls and lamps. 

To me him being able to do this is like me watching a painter online and then picking up a paintbrush and being able to paint something one could recognize. Never gonna happen to me. I am unable to do anything using a talent. 

I was not given one. Although picking husbands I'm good at. I picked two good funny men named Rick. I guess that's somethin'. 

And I got better after my first try too! 

What to Say

The other evening as we were watching an early show. Rick made a flippant comment and I chuckled and told him he couldn't say that anymore. 

His head whipped back so quickly as if to say, "what you talkin' bout Willis?"

So I explained.

He kept saying, "really? that is offensive? to whom?"  

I explain.

He said I still don't get it because....

I explain again.

Then I said, "even if you don't understand just don't ever say something like that again."  

Okay, he says feeling deflated.

He then said, "I feel bad now that I didn't think that was a bad thing to say."

"I know. It's fine I get you. I know your intent and heart but others will be offended. Just.don't.ever.say.that,period!"

"Got it."

Rick is struggling. He is a 66 yr old man living in the 21st century when there are no longer just two pronouns. He doesn't get "they" "their" to use to describe a male or female, which in 2021 no longer exists. 

While I too have a very difficult time understanding it or why/when it must be used I just know I have to. But I am a "she" just so you know. I laugh as I type that because what the hell does that even mean? 

We spent more time conversing about pronouns, fluid sexuality, nonbinary, and all the things neither of us baby boomers completely understand. A friend was a boy and is now a girl. She is so happy now. So to me, she is a she but is that correct? I don't want to offend so I must ask her. I just love that she is who she was meant to be and that she is happy healthy and is finally comfortable within herself. But apparently, that may not be good enough.

Is there a manual for this? I don't want to offend. I don't wish to make anyone upset or worse to hurt them.

So when kids get upset they need to understand in our sex classes we were taught heterosexual, homosexual, bi-sexual, and transgender.  So all these new groups are new to me and we are both trying like hell to wrap our heads around and learn. We can't just walk through life saying we're old and don't get it. We are old and don't get it but we want to get it and learn. 

So where's Dr. Ruth's book on this? Jesus that's showing my friggin' age too isn't it? Sexuality for Dummies perhaps?

I had a co-worker friend while living in Seattle. I assumed she was gay when I met her. She was the nicest person to me while the other women were just mean girls. We became fast friends. We used to lunch together. We explored Seattle together. She and I drank wine lying on my sofa watching the movie Emma one evening while Rick was traveling. She fell asleep and I left her on my sofa with a pillow, blanket, and a note that I went to bed.  Stay and we'll do breakfast in the morning. She was so fun. I loved this new friend I had made. 

She was dating once in a while and our boss fixed her up with someone. 

I heard the horror story and thought, gee I guess I was wrong to assume. 

Then one day as I left the office I had just gotten in my car when she ran up to my window. I put the window down and put the car back in park. She wanted to tell me something she said. I asked if she wanted to get in. Nope. She leaned against the window and told me she was gay. 

Okay, what do I say to not upset her? I don't want to say the wrong thing.

But I did.

I said," J. I am so happy you felt so comfortable telling me this. 

You know I love you and don't give a hoot about your sexuality.

I'm your friend no matter who you love." 

She pulled back from my window and said, "Okay see you tomorrow."

I knew from her backing away I said the wrong thing. 

Damn is there Miss Manners Etiquette on this?

Several years later while visiting me in DC she told me I had upset her. 

She wanted to hear that I was happy for her. 

That has haunted me. 

Now I never know what to say when this is said to me, but I always say what J. wanted me to say. And then a gay guy friend with whom I shared this story told me she was nuts and there was nothing wrong with what I said. Oh for the love of God.

So here we are two 60 somethings trying like hell to understand and not offend.

20 somethings, be patient with us.

So being in my 60s doesn't let me off the hook to learn more so I will continue to try to do better and not offend. 

Gout Anyone?

I was to meet a blogger yesterday for lunch. However, it didn't work out that way. It threw my whole day off. I was ready to go but last-minute change. 

I had errands to run and I was then heading to meet her for lunch. So I ran my errands and then came home. It was too late to begin the things I wanted to do and it ended up being a wasted day of sorts. 

Today is another day for the things needing to be done around here. 

Rick has been dealing with gout. Here is what I don't understand. He got gout years ago in his big toe. Then years later he got it in his right elbow. But when that hit his elbow he didn't know it was gout. How is that possible when you've had it before?  Last week his left arm began to hurt and then swell. His left hand was so swollen his fingers looked like sausages. He said the pain was horrific. I asked if this was gout. He said, No, not the same besides I've never had it here. Ok.

Well apparently once you have this it can appear in other areas of your body but I wasn't going to say anything because he was so damn cranky. 

I've known him for 35yrs, I prefer peace so I know better to let him go on whether he is correct or not. 

This pain and suffering went on for days. (for Rick too)  

His arm is HUGE now. I ask a million times are you sure this isn't gout? 

He snaps at me that he's never had it in this arm. 

Fine. But does it feel like gout? I actually didn't ask that after he snapped. 

But that was what I would have asked if he was acting human. 

I did have the courage to ask if he was taking his gout medication and he said every day but this isn't gout. okay.

2 days ago he decides this is gout. I could just hit him upside the head sometimes. He had just had vodka and rum over the holidays and he knows better. Beer and liquor do this to him. If pain complaining wasn't enough now he is bitching that he has to stop drinking. (wine does not affect him) 

I know it makes him sad but I can't have gluten we all have to deal buddy. So now I have a whiny ass, big man, in pain, cranky as all hell and his concern is he can't seem to drink anymore. OMG. Okay, he needs his mourning period. I had one with gluten, I understand. But I can move out during this mourning period?

He has not been able to move his arm, straighten it or let it hang down by his side. In all honesty, it doesn't even look like an arm. 

And if that is not bad enough Izzy was in the way and he went to move around her but lost his balance and banged this arm into the corner of the molding on the wall. Oh dear did he let out a yelp. I felt bad for him on that one. Thankfully he laughed and said, It just friggin' figures doesn't it?

Today he can move it a bit and even hang it partially down by his side. Partially. But it no longer has a heartbeat he tells me so that makes Peggy's life so much better because he is not cranky. And we all know it's all about me. 

Why don't you ever hear of women getting gout? I've known a 30 yr man with gout and then Rick got his first bout around 45. I am unaware of any women with gout. The way Rick goes on I imagine it is quite painful. But one never knows with him. We both had shingles. We both had different reactions. He got it and the world was ending, he was going to die, "the pain was so horrible Margaret you will never understand." 

I got shingles and it was damn painful but as he likes to tell me mine wasn't as bad as his so I could go to work. Oh really? Rick twisted his ankle and he whined for days. I tore my meniscus and climbed stairs daily in pain and heaven forbid I say I was hurting he'd tell me to shake it off or take some Tylenol. He is the "strong" one right?  

Let's hope this is over soon. He's not working in his workshop with all this pain and inability to move his arm. So you know what that means. He's in pain and not leaving the house and he is always here.

Dear Lord this retirement has a learning curve now, doesn't it? 

Quickie

I saw this on the national news. 
Then I saw this from the VA governor on Instagram

Seeing this on the news and here in a post from VA governor, made me very thankful that Rick isn't on I-95 daily anymore. 

How awful for these people!  I saw where one NBC news person had to overnight in his car with his dog! No food, no water. Trying to get the dog to go outside the car. Nightmare!  Let alone where did he go?

Rick mentioned that had we been living up there he'd have been in this for certain. I can't fathom sitting in his work vehicle freezing overnight. Just horrific and I still don't understand how this happened. Just very thankful we aren't dealing with any of that, including snow. It was 80 degrees Monday then Tuesday it was 39 with high winds and rain. Love it compared to 80. 

I like 80 in July, not January. I'm weird like that. 

When Rick met me he laughed at what I kept in my car for winter. My Dad would ask me every year after I moved out, got your car ready for winter? That meant, jumper cables, fluids filled/antifreeze etc, a blanket, kitty litter if I got stuck for traction, beverage, and snacks.  I would have cheese crackers or some such thing. Then I met Rick and he opened my trunk one day and said, "where are you going?"  I said nowhere but if I do get stuck somewhere I'm prepared. He laughed at me. 

My dad had 5 girls who he always gave fun gifts like tools, fire ladders to throw out my apartment window to climb out, jumper cables, and one Christmas a AAA membership so I'd stop calling him and call AAA. I think that's funny. But it was also incredibly helpful even though at age 21 I didn't think it was a fun gift. 

Today is beautifully sunny, with perfect blue skies but it's cold at 35 but our high should be 44. So to me, that is perfect January weather.

It's been so warm, our trees are budding. The shrubbery we see on our dog walks has flowers blooming. Poor mother Nature is so confused. 

I don’t bring my phone on walks or I'd have taken a pic of how high the daffodils are right now.  Crazy shit. 

Speaking of walks, we really miss sidewalks!! Not the same for Izzy or us. 

And at night we must have on reflective vests and of course, Izzy already has the reflective gear. It's scary to walk around here at night. Like 5pm. :-)

Yea he did.

My husband was on the floor in the kitchen sanding a side panel cabinet box on the island. We put in the island and he's been busy or not busy but just didn't want to do it so I have been living with it unfinished. I knew it'd get done eventually. I had storage and a workspace I could live.

So he is on the floor in the kitchen, the dog is curled in the corner watching him and I came into the kitchen to see what he is doing making all this noise. He looks up at me and smiles. I went over and planted a good kiss on his kisser. I then turned to walk away but then the little shit says, "God I love when my customers do that!!"  
(Well you know me, the giggler, I really laughed at that.)

 
"Oh, do they do that?  I think I'm glad you're retired."  And I turned to leave. 

He yelled, "I'm on strike until I see boobs. Customers always show me their titties after a kiss."

OMG, this bad little boy.  I grabbed Izzy and lifted her up and I showed him titties.  Canine ones, but he didn't specify now did he?  Then I put her back down and I left. I heard his laughter down the hall.  Then the sander went on so he knew technically he saw what he asked for and strike averted! 

That'll teach him. 

Good Girls Revolt

Good Girls Revolt is the name of the show on Prime.
It has been in my queue to watch forever. I finally watched it. 

Sadly it is only 1 season and then canceled. 

In 2 days I slept 2 hrs. Story for another day.

While I've been a walking zombie I watched this in the wee hours.

This moved me.  This was everything I lived through as a working woman.

When she writes the copy and her name isn't on it I felt it. I felt the kick in the gut. It gave me all the feels. Been there.

Once I was sent to Chicago for training so I could learn to program the information about our airline schedules and booking fees on the computer and something that was called the OAG. This info also went to help with the tariffs for city pairs (stl - ord, that's st louis to o'hare) You see you wrote tickets then and you needed this info for ticketing as well. All this was used by corporate travelers and businesses, travel agents, people flying, hotels, etc could see this info. (airlines too) This OAG was a business travelers bible. The OAG was used because at the time, not all airlines were in a computer (it cost and it was new) so to see all airlines with a certain city pair you could find the tariffs, and well just everything.  I was sent because he had a family and didn't wish to go. The real reason was he didn't understand this and he and I both knew it. The boss didn't...at first. 

I went to Chicago learned everything and came back to do the work for him. The day I really lost it was when they were in a meeting with the airline's CEO and other top execs. He couldn't answer any of the questions. So they put me on speaker to help him. I needed this job but I was silent for a minute because I actually considered saying, "didn't Barry do this work? Wouldn't he have the answer?"  I was shaking.  But I didn't stand up for myself and I am still pissed at myself.  Oh, there were so many issues like that in my career. I was even told I was too ugly to be at the ticket counter. 

No shit. Why weren't we litigious then? A week later I went to the President (female) and discussed this. She gave me a raise to shut me up. woohoo, cents. 

So I worked on plan B. When I left I went to her directly to tell her why. I was making $8,840 a year there. I did my job and my boss's job. She said she'd give me a 50 cent raise. I told her I was not going to work hourly anymore. I gave my notice. She asked my pay, I told her it was $21,180 more. She opened her mouth and never said anything. She knew. Now in today's world 30K isn't much but it was a start in my eyes. And it worked out to be just that. The ladder was now in front of me to climb.

I do not wish to go back to 1970. But I cheered these women on.  

It is inspired by a book by Lynn Povich and based on true life events. 

The actress playing Nora Ephron quits when they tell her she can't write because she is female. This was after he read it aloud and said it was spot on and what you men should be striving for. He patted a guy on the shoulders for God's sake.  When he found out it was written by his female researchers he wouldn't publish it. Did you hear me scream?