Snake Plant

When we were selling our home in Northern VA our realtor had a stager come to our home. I asked what he thought the stager would be changing. He told me probably remove my sofa table. I found that odd. But I listened to his few suggestions and then he added, "well what do I know. She is an expert and she will walk you through it all and she will have  your home ready to sell." 

The stager set up an appointment and came to our home. The first thing she said was what a gorgeous home we had.  Yes, that was very nice and I figured she says that to everyone selling their homes. I'm not a fool.  I did not take this as a compliment to me as much as my builder, who actually won an award for the design of this home. She was just blowing smoke up my butt. I knew what she was doing but I wasn't paying her the realtor was paying her, so she didn't have to do this. 

As we walked every room and all 3 floors she told me there was nothing she would change. She asked if I was going to leave a picture that hung over my credenza in my office and I said no, it's going with me. She asked if she could buy it. I laughed and said, "no I like it a lot" (now I wish I had sold it, no room for it here)

As we stood around my kitchen island she said, "so I can say I did something, how about we make a vignette on the island. She grabbed my big butcher block cutting board, put a dish towel across it on the diagonal, and put a cookbook in a cookbook holder on the cutting board with a beautiful bottle of oil I had on the counter. 

She stepped back and admired her work and said, "that is all we need to do, your  home is just fine the way it is" 

At this point I am thinking, you are being paid for this crap? I want this job and get paid for nothing when a client has it done already.

Then she asked if I wanted a job. Did I just say that out loud?

I said I would LOVE to stage but I'm moving out of state. She again told me my home was very nice and I should do this for a living if I liked the idea. Hmm....I discuss with her that I have no degree in design. She asked who did my home. I said me. She said you know what you need to take away to sell. You know what to leave. Ah, but this is how I live, I did not stage my home for you. 

When I was flipping I did it all day every day because I loved it. 

I did not stage my home. So that ruins your theory. She said she would hire me on the spot to assist her. Boy, I loved that idea. I love design, and I read and watch this stuff ad nauseam, at least that is Rick's comment.

So that got me thinking. How about a job being a stager? Now that I am feeling better and getting out and about I have looked at part-time jobs with stagers. 

The money would be nice and I could get of the house.

I've called a few. Most of them here have 1 or 2 people doing this in a firm. Basically, they are all only the owner and 1 employee. I have not found a big company like the one that came to my house up north. I contacted my realtor and discussed it with him. He referred me to someone. I called but she has 1 employee and no need for another. One told me they were thinking of bringing on an intern but hadn't decided. I am assuming an intern does not get paid. 

So it's all small potatoes here. But since the market is changing stagers are used more, so it could change. I just thought maybe doing something I love like design/color/textiles etc. would be fun. It was a nice try. 

Sunday Rick and I hopped in the car and went to this place that shall remain nameless now. It's a plant store with a bar inside. The adverts were so misleading. It showed a two-story store filled with plants (house plants) and a place to buy and pot your own if you pick out a pot in one of their rooms filled with beautiful ornate planters to plain planters. 

We arrived at a full parking lot. We get inside and there is nothing much. A very minimal amount of houseplants. Lots of succulents. It was not overflowing with greenery.  

I wanted a snake plant. It doesn't require a lot of light and this house has no light so I thought that would be perfect. The small ones were $65.00. 

Their size was not much larger than a clipping.

I assumed this size to be $30 at the very top of the range due to its small size.  

The one Rick grabbed, which was the size I originally wanted, was over $150.  

No, this was too rich for my blood. I am not paying $150 for a snake plant. 

The shelves were not bare but sparse. We walked upstairs to the pottery room, plant food, some tables, and the bar. It was laid out nicely but the whole vibe was weird.

We saw the glass of wine the bartender poured for the patron and it was a sip. The cost was $20. We did not drink either. It just wasn't a comfortable place I can't explain it. I didn't want to sit here besides I can drink a whole bottle of wine at home for the same price. 

Normally when I go to a plant store or nursery, the folks are chill, bohemian-like, or hippie-like. They can't wait to talk about their plants. This was like a hedge fund guy running this. It was so not all back-to-nature type feel. 

It was incredibly odd and not welcoming. In fact, Rick said it was cold and he could never imagine a place filled with plants feeling cold but this did the trick.

He was on to something.

We walked the entire place and even attempted to ask a couple of questions, but no one was helpful and then we left. So we can cross this off our lists of things we wanted to see.  

Come March the plants will be brought back into the farmers market and I will go buy my plants from The Raleigh Farmers Market.

They are healthier looking, and far less expensive and that place brings me joy, joy, joy. I don't need a $20 sip of wine with my teeny tiny $65 snake plant.

Clueless

My husband has this awesome ability to not see himself.  

While looking at a photo from a wedding he asked who the bald guy was talking to Melanie's mom. I told him it was him. He about died.

He ran into the bathroom and looked at the back of his head. 

He saw the very thin spot. He seriously had no clue. No clue even though he's been told about it for years. Can you imagine if your stylist told you that your hair was so thin in the back you had an almost bald spot? Would you forget that? No, one would assume you may even fret about it needlessly or fret about it obsessively. Either way, normal people would not forget this tid bit of information.

How about when your stylist leaves your hair longer in that area and you asked me to cut it. You asked why they leave it so long in that area and I tell you they are trying to cover your bald spot. But he laughs as if I'm joking. 

Then when I began doing his hair since lockdown I tell him how thin it is and he laughs.  He really doesn't believe me. Then he sees a photo. 

Now he's in shock.

Honestly, he's exasperating.

His clothes don't fit so he gets bigger ones. He doesn't see this big belly he has amassed in retirement.  I say something about cutting back. 

He gets upset. So I did a bad wife thing. I took some pictures of him in the workshop. I showed him the pictures a few days later. 

He asked, "is my stomach really that big?"  

"Yes, I'm sorry it is."

"OMG!" is all he says.

Now he will diet. He will make an attempt and that usually last 2-3 days and he quits.  I don't understand him. It's not like I'm eating junk while he's dieting either. He just does what he wants in this area and won't listen to anyone.

I wish I could be as clueless as him. Gee going up to a size 40 waist and soon to be over, didn't give you a clue? All your jeans don't fit didn't offer up a hint? He can carry weight more than most due to his sheer size. Big broad shoulders and 6'2". BUT...

I want to be as clueless as a man some days.

Your Peanut Butter Box is Here!

My husband is amused by this stupid Chewy commercial.

I'm sure you've 'heard' it.

"Georgio, the Peanut Butter Box is here. The peanut butter box is here"

My husband now walks around saying this in the accent the dog uses. 

JC, It is very annoying. Very.  I told him if he didn't stop I'd give him a peanut butter treat that would make him go to sleep for a very long time, very long.

He just laughs. He thinks I'm joking. 

Keep it up joker boy and find out. 

In other news - 

My hair appointment for a consultation was a bust. 

It was Friday at 2:15p.

I got there 10 minutes early because I wasn't sure where it was and I'd rather be early than late. 

She is in a Salon Suites type cluster of offices. 

If you are unfamiliar - The stylist rents a 'room' and they have their own "shop" without the huge overhead. There are a ton of them in one building. Anyway, her door was locked and the lights were off. I sat in the hall on the bench waiting. Now it was time for my appt and she is still not in her studio. The man/barber across the hall has been chatting with me. He asked what time my appointment was scheduled. I told him 2:15. 

He looks at his watch and says it was 2:25p. 

Yep, I'll wait until 2:30p. He asks if this was my first time here. 

I reply yes it was. He made a face and said, "geez I'm sorry"  

He goes back to his studio, gets a bag of garbage, and takes his trash out. On his way back he said, "I just saw her and she went into the bathroom, she'll be right here" 

I say, "thank you" and I wait.

She comes around the corner and says in an oh-so-snippy snarky way, "hi, you're very early and I can't take you just yet."  No smile. Just cold as ice.

I said, "early? my appointment was 2:15p"  

She snaps, "No, no it was at 2:45p" 

No smile or politeness at all. 

This is how you speak to a prospective client? Really?

I look at my text from her. I automatically assumed I was wrong. 

I've been known to do that. I show her and say, "Stephanie my appointment was at 2pm and you texted me to ask me to come in at 2:15p if I wouldn't mind."  

She is fumbling with her phone and looks up shocked. I mean, her mouth was open for real like in a movie. She just stared at me for a minute and said nothing.

Now let me tell you how much her face changed from bitch face to omg egg on my face. She changes tones so fast it was shocking. 

She begins to apologize. She really thought her next appt (me) was at 2:45p. She walks into her studio and looks at her calendar and freaks out that everything is off from what she thought. Her whole afternoon is a cluster !@#$ right now. She is spazzing. Her client appointments are all messed up.

So apparently now I was squeezed in with someone knocking at the door. She had another appointment & I barely had enough time to discuss it. 

She just kept apologizing. Now, this would only be a consultation and no cut because of her mistake. I said, "we have all done it, it's okay. let's move on."  Okay, you messed up but let's do at least part of the appointment. 

She thanked me for not being a Karen but the whole thing was a cluster. Rick said it should have been my first sign that this was not for me. 

Then on the way home, there was traffic. I have never encountered traffic here since moving here 1 year ago. It took me 1.25 hr to get home. Took me 28 minutes to get there. There was an accident on I-40 so I was just sitting on the highway and not moving for a very long time. I had to pee too and even contemplated pulling over and peeing outside which I have never done in 66 yrs. I had to pee that badly.  But I just wiggled in my seat until I got home.

The traffic was strike 2 for me. I came home and talked to Rick about everything. He told me her being late he would have already left why did you stay? I stayed because I have been late before. Yes, but wouldn't you have texted the person? Yes, I would have but I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, driving maybe she can't text me, you know stuff like that.

He kept shaking his head. In her defense she didn't know she was late was my thought but I wasn't going to debate this with him.

Then I bitched about the traffic on the way home and maybe I don't want to go that far north every 6 weeks I whine. He began to belly laugh. 

"Margaret who are you? You have been here 1 year, 6 months of it in a coma, and you have A traffic situation once and you're complaining about traffic? How long did it take you to get to Tracey's with no traffic? Oh wait, was there ever no traffic up north? NO, and it was 10-12 miles and took an hour or more. Listen to you!!"

He's right and I hate when he's right. I did adjust to no traffic quickly didn't I? 

Then he adds, "I think this was just a sign. Someone is telling you to move on, so pay attention! I wouldn't wait for strike three it could be the haircut"

Ah, geez, he's right again. Too many things off. And when I asked her opinion about this or that she'd say, "whatever you want" NO, I told you upfront I want some opinions and choices and I don't get offended by anything you can say. I told her that so she'd be brutally honest. But...

So I'm trying someone else for another consultation. 😊

Here we go again. And I think I'll just cut it all off again.

I am always going to have short hair because I do not have the patience to grow out my short hair. This ugly frumpy stage is not good for anyone. '

You to view and me to wear!

Special Forces

Of late my husband and I don't seem to like a lot of the same television shows.
This is a new thing. But we have enough TVs that we don't have to worry about it, it's just a new thing over the last 2 years it seems.

I was going to read one evening and I curled up into the corner of the L-shaped sofa with my book and my blanket and I was all set. Rick came in to watch TV. I said go for it, I'm reading, it won't bother me/

He began to watch a program called Special Forces. I'd hear something and look up and before you know it I am asking him what the hell these people are doing. Well, fast forward a couple of weeks and I've seen every episode now. From the outside, it sure doesn't appeal to me. But then you get these people who are such wackadoodles it's hard to look away.

Special Forces is exactly what you think they are. 

Wikipedia says, "Special forces and special operations forces are military units trained to conduct special operations. NATO has defined special operations as "military activities conducted by specially designated, organized, selected, trained and equipped forces using unconventional techniques and modes of employment".

This is the synopsis of the show by the channel it airs on.

Selection for the Special Forces is a test unlike any other. Sixteen celebrities from all genres will take on, and try to survive, demanding training exercises led by Directing Staff (DS) agents, an elite team of ex-Special Forces operatives. In this unique series, the only way for these recruits to leave is to give up on their own accord, through failure or potential injury, or by force from the DS. Viewers will see the recruits face the harshest of environments that simulate the highly classified selection process, pushing themselves in the ultimate test of their physical, mental and emotional resilience – revealing the celebrities’ deepest and truest character. The 16 celebrity recruits include Danny Amendola, Mel B, Hannah Brown, Tyler Florence, Kate Gosselin, Dwight Howard, Montell Jordan, Gus Kenworthy, Nastia Liukin, Carli Lloyd, Beverley Mitchell, Kenya Moore, Mike Piazza, Dr. Drew Pinsky, Anthony Scaramucci and Jamie Lynn Spears.

Now here is what I found so interesting. The younger athletes all behave as though they have always gotten participation trophies because when they get yelled at it's not their fault, you're being mean to me. It makes me laugh.

Also, the dudes who say things like, I'm tough this can't break me. The one fella who said this was the first one to say, "Nope I'm outta here" on the first episode. That made me laugh too. The older athletes don't behave this way.

I find the personality struggles very interesting.

I've been very impressed with some women, most who's names I can't recall. But Mel B. (spice girls) was stronger than I ever thought.

Would you have thought she would be so tough? I didn't and I was wrong, but something triggered her in an episode and she was never the same. One of the women was something I would assume you'd see in a victorian movie, she got the vapors, or she is going to cry because it's hard. Stuff like that. Hasn't even done anything yet or knows what they are going to ask of her but it's hard and it's scary and she will burst into tears. Not just tears but the ole Ugly Cry. She was always crying and whining and I just wanted her to go home if she couldn't straighten up and fly right. I get it, I'd cry too sometimes, but if you saw this young woman you'd want to slap her to get a grip. I felt bad at first, but then I saw she was her own worst enemy. She got what she wanted when she behaved that way. So it works for her I suppose. But some of the women like Kate Gosselin from the reality show Kate+8. Well, she is just like you'd think she would be.

I could NEVER EVER do any of this. Heaven knows I am not saying I'd do better. Nope but then I would never apply to this show.

115 degrees and you want me to run? I don't think so!

Dangle from a Hi-wire? No!

Sinking a vehicle while I'm inside and I have to get out before I die? No F'ing Way EVER!!

So I'd be the person who would say, Here's my badge, I'm done, I'm a wussy and you can call me names. Not gonna do it. The first hour I'd be gone.

They are dropping like flies on the show as well. No one thus far has been asked to leave they have all left on their own accord because it was too tough or as the one kid said, "The Staff is not giving me respect." Yes, Special Force Staff is to give YOU respect.

Again, another participation trophy kid, you can spot them a mile away.

But the one who really got me. Using your kids. It's so hard, I've never been away this long. (bullshit, you're an actress, like you don't ever leave home to work?) So she wanted to leave because she missed her kids so badly. I would think she knew before she left that it would be 10 days away and she cracked in the first 8 hrs. C'mon, what did you think was going to happen? That kind of thing annoys me. If you know you'll miss your children, then don't sign up! Or miss them but do what you signed up for. It was an easy excuse to leave as far as I could see it.

Anyhow, I did finally finish my book but now Rick has got me watching this crazy stuff. Have you seen it?

A Different Event.

Since moving here we haven't done as much as we'd normally do. 

First the trauma of the move and finding where to put 2300 sq ft of stuff into a 1300 sq foot home. Then the dog was ill and died, then I got sick and that was a full 6 months of nothing. So when I saw this local event being held at the local Yoga Studio on Thursday night I thought why the hell not?  

I'm feeling better every week and I want to do stuff. 

Money is always our issue these days but this didn't cost a thing so why not give this a shot? 

It was listed as an event for sound therapy, Reiki, and there would be free wine. Well, I thought I've always wanted to try Reiki and free wine is always a perk so why not? 

What else did we have to do on a Thursday evening? 

I did not think Rick would wish to go but I asked him. He laughed and said no thanks. Then a day later he said, "You know what I'll go with you what do I have to wear, and do I need to find my yoga mat?"

I told him to wear whatever is comfortable and since it was 75 degrees Thursday he wore shorts and a T-shirt and I pulled out our yoga mats. I told him to not make smart remarks because he may think this is all new-age bullshit. If he is going with me he can feel that way but keep it to himself until we are out of class is that a deal? He laughed and agreed. 

We had to be there at 7p. Because we were not 100% sure of this location we left a bit early and we're glad we did. We knew the street but we just couldn't find the building to #104 on this street. We saw 101 and 105 but no buildings for 102, 103, or 104.  We were in an alley of sorts, the road was a dead end off the main street. We'd turned our car around and tried again.

Then we kept seeing the same cars and people walking with yoga mats aimlessly so we pulled over and asked a man who we saw on the corner when we first made the turn off the main street. He laughed and said, "I think we need better signs" (like I haven't been saying this I got here!)  He directed us. A couple was walking and saw our mats and asked if we were going to the yoga studio. So they followed us. Before you know it we had a line of people following us and we had no idea what we were doing so we found that very funny. 

We get there and they were very unorganized. Couldn't just walk in. Apparently, the registration was not only on the Eventbrite sight it was on their yoga studio website and she had to keep toggling back and forth to get our info and to be sure we signed up because there wasn't a lot of room. Then she just said, the hell with the Eventbrite site just give me your info and I'll start again. Oh my goodness.

The bitch that I am, finds this so unorganized and so unnecessary. If you own this yoga studio, which the woman doing our intake info does, she should have gotten the names from the Eventbrite site and put those in her spreadsheet prior to the night of the event. This way there would not have been a wait to get in while she typed new data into her computer. C'mon, I wanted to yell, you knew about the event for 4 weeks or more, get it together! This was such a cluster the way she did it. We began 30 minutes late because of her being so unorganized.

Okay, we get inside and there are way too many people for this small room. 

But Rick and I set up so we are sitting on the floor against a wall. They said upon opening the doors to grab a place to sit cross-legged on the floor. I prefer to lean against the wall for 2 hours than just to sit cross-legged on the floor in the middle of the room so we grabbed ourselves a couple spots against a wall. If it wasn't sitting all night then no problem but we just weren't sure what the hell we were going to be doing so I chose to sit upright with the wall behind me. 

The Reiki person who held this event in the woman's Yoga Studio introduced herself and tells us what to expect for the evening. The sound was for your chakras.

I did not find the sound soothing and at one point one of the bowls made a sound that hurt my ears so I stuck my fingers in my ear. Rick found that odd but hey, I'm odd. I did not like it. I know everyone else seemed to enjoy it and found it relaxing. I found it anything but relaxing and very annoying. 

Then Reiki. God, I thought this was utter bullshit but after one gets over all the new age shit it was remarkable. We had a quick 5-minute reiki session apiece. Normally it is an hour or longer. But for the class to learn and with all of us to have a turn if we wanted it, this had to be done this way. Those who were not lying on the table were to do some of what the reiki master did. The person on the table sets the intention. For example, a woman got on the table and said she'd like help with her anger. Okay.

We all cupped our hands together over her. Rick got a jolt so hard he moved his body back. I looked at him and he made a face that I knew was going to be a good story when we could talk.  There was also a woman who got on the table and I couldn't hear her intention so I don't know what she wanted to be helped with. But again, Rick got goosebumps and I saw the hair on his arms stand up. I saw him shake his head. I should say I felt this and opened my eyes and watched him shake his head and I saw his arms at that time. When it was over he told the Reiki master what he felt. She told him after the event he should study Reiki.

He laughed because he was the biggest skeptic about all of this "new age shit" as he referred to it.  Hey, I was happy he went with a somewhat open mind. We both were very skeptical but figured what the hell. Still skeptical in all honesty. But things happened that I can't explain.

Rick got on the table and he set the intention for his heart. When her hands were over his head his eyes are closed and he can't see any of us. I kept my eyes open since it was him. I wanted to watch it this time. He got a jolt to his chest that was odd and he opened his eyes and then closed them again. When he got off the table he told her he opened his eyes because he wondered who was touching him. No one was touching him that is the point. He said it felt like someone hit him in the chest. Weird stuff. Do I understand it all? No, I do not. All in the person's head? Who knows.

It was fun though. It was interesting. It was something new. 

Afterward, we each had a small glass of wine and mingled for a short bit. 

I felt so tired and I wanted to go home.

I came home so relaxed I could barely stay awake and it was only 9:30p. 

I sat on the sofa and I could feel that I was going to fall asleep. So I got up and went to bed at 9:45p. I just couldn't keep my eyes open. Even today my shoulders are down and I feel so light and less stressed it's odd. (I'm writing this on Friday morning) 

I feel like I'm on island time. I am relaxed and chilled as I normally only get after 2 weeks in the Caribbean. 😉

I don't know what the hell all that was. It was interesting and it was sort of fun.

We got out and met fun people who knew nothing about this just like us. So it was nice to be out of the house amongst people who were not annoying or gross like the woman in my CVS earlier in the week. 

I do want to share that the gorgeous black woman sitting next to me made comments all evening that made me giggle. She came with a friend who was sitting on the other side of Rick. She said she thought this was all 'horse shit' but her friend asked her to come along. She ended up loving the sound therapy. I guess it was just me that hated it.

When this man got on the table she made a comment about how fine he was. She was funny. I told her I didn't see a wedding ring and she winked at me. I saw her talking to him later when everyone grabbed a glass of wine. So if it was horse shit for her at least she looked like she made a new friend. I said goodbye to her and said, 'go for it' he sure is handsome. She giggled.

But it's still all a bit of a head-scratcher to me of what the hell I just did and witnessed. But I am not saying I won't do it again. I honestly don't know if it's in my head or what but I am so damn chill today, Friday after all this was done. 

Ever have Reiki or a sound bath therapy session?

Diggin' For Gold

I had to go to the pharmacy this past Wednesday around 5ish. 

You know when everyone is stopping by after work and the lines are long.  

I stood in line forever. (okay not forever but 20 minutes too long)

I don't know what high-end multi-tier bullshit was going on in front of me but both registers were with the same 2 women the entire time. Hand gestures flying and it was insane. The line was down an entire aisle. 

I was finally next in line but it was taking so long that I was at the point of thinking, just leave and come back. Then all of a sudden I see the woman in front of me on the left register begin digging in her butt. 

I mean to tell you, she pulled the fabric on her dress and she was digging for gold. And for a long time - yikes!! 

She had an itch and public be damned.

The man to my left looked at me & made this face that made me laugh. 

I said, "Welcome to Johnston County"  He then laughed too. 

Then the itchy-butt woman handed the gal at the register her money with the same hand. We both said, "Eeeewwww" at the same time and laughed.

I was up next & honest to Pete I did not even want to stand there.

When the person went to get the medication I was picking up, the guy who was now next to me at the other register leaned over & says, "got an itch?"

OH my god, that made me laugh out loud. He winked. 

He grabbed his Rx and said goodbye and have a nice night.

Yeah, after I get that picture out of my head! 

I wish I had gotten out my phone and videoed this to show you and Rick. Rick kept saying, "in the store? in front of everyone?"  

Yes indeed in the store, in front of everyone and it wasn't a quick scratch"

OMG was all he said.

So that was my fun day at the pharmacy.

Work Ethic

I read an article in my Instagram feed by Humans of NY. I thought it was excellent. Rick complained about this when he was in HR and this is what was burning him out. The whining, the poor work ethic. Before his company folded he thought he couldn't take millennials and younger anymore they drove him crazy with the whining and complaining about everything. 

Work past 5 without you feeding me? So the company had a budget for their kitchen of breakfast, lunch, and dinner. When money was an issue, budgets were slashed. No more breakfast was how it started. Oh, the whining. People threatened to quit. Mind you they were all making a 6 figure salary - to me, that should have been cut first.

Then they got rid of the huge lunch budget and made it smaller. People were quitting over not being able to eat 3 meals a day. Rick said fine if you find someone who will feed you 3 meals a day and pay you go for it. Are you sure you wish to leave due to not being feed? 3 of them said yes and left. He was so frustrated. 2 came back asking for their jobs back but Rick did not hire them, they had been replaced by people who went out to lunch or brought their own lunch. 

Granted working past 5 and sometimes into the night they wanted to eat. There was lunch food to eat and a credit card so they could order food in if staying late. Rick monitored that as well. They took advantage at times but he let some of that slide. If you have a deadline and they are there until 8pm, he felt they should get dinner delivered. The vodka they had delivered did not fly!!!!! 

This company put private citizens in space. Deadlines were a big deal. Sometimes dealing with the Russians at the space station they shared was a headache. One, being they were Russian, and two being time differences. so he understood the late nights etc he would never have begrudged those. It was the ones who stayed late, did not work just ate!

The young whipper snappers bitched a fit because the coffee maker was antiquated. You know like a Keurig. They wanted an espresso machine like in Starbucks and they got one. They still whined. He gave them 3 options it was voted and he got the one with the majority votes. 

This woman's experience is what he dealt with. He and I have the same work ethic as this woman. So I know it's an age thing.

Here is what I could copy and paste.

Her photo was attached but I don't think I'm allowed to post that. A young looking 77 yr old. 

humansofny

Verified

“I worked as a legal assistant for 50 years. And I’ve always been lucky to work for honest, kind, brilliant attorneys. All that paperwork might seem boring to other people. But I never even took lunch, that’s how much I loved it. I loved the law. It’s very precise. My work needed to be exactly right. And there was a lot of pride there. But something seems to have changed in the culture. So many of my coworkers would rush out the door at 5 o’clock. With important, unfinished things on their desk. In law, you have to get things out quickly, but it’s like they just didn’t care. Maybe it’s a generational thing. I’m older, I’m 77. So maybe there’s something I don’t get. ‘Quiet quitting,’ and all of that, I just don’t understand it. If it’s just a paycheck to you—if you’re getting by on the minimum, and not trying to be perfect, or God forbid, if you're screwing it up on purpose-- why are you even going to work? Save your pennies and quit. Find something else you can take pride in. If you’re spending eight hours a day on something you don’t take pride in, it seems to me that somewhere, deep down inside, you’re a phony. Maybe not a phony. But you’re deluding yourself. It’s going to spill over into the rest of your life. And there’s not enough money for me. Well, $20,000 a week maybe. But otherwise, there’s not enough money for me to not take pride in my work. I couldn’t do it. I know that sounds ridiculous, but I can’t. You know how people text, and there’s like spelling mistakes and grammar mistakes and everything? Not me. I’ll reread everything. I’ll go back and fix it, I’ll put in the comma. That’s who I am. You either have it or you don’t, and fewer people have it now. I think it was the digital revolution. When I first started working there were typewriters. If you made a mistake, you had to redo it. You had to be careful, you had to get it right-- until the computer came along. I remember my boss was so excited about the computer age. He said: ‘It’s going to be great! We’re going to have a paperless office!’ I knew better. I told him: ‘There’s going to be a lot more paper, actually.’ Because you can reprint everything. And nobody’s going to care anymore.’”

And just 'cause.

Company

I have company coming. Dear Lord.

Look I am happy to see people but honestly, it's never a good time when it's sprung on you.

My cousin's kid is in Florida and driving up this way and stopping by. Her mom got me something when I was in the throes of my medical nightmare this past year. She is bringing the gift her mother never sent. Her mom would text me and say I just walked by your gift on my dining room table. I'm thinking of you does that count. It made me laugh. of course, it counts and I don't need any gifts!! Her mom has been ill and will be having surgery so she doesn't need to worry about me.

But her daughter messaged me this a.m. that she would like to come by on her way north tomorrow around 10am. 

Let me tell you what we did the last couple of days.

We had a room where the door was shut. It had boxes that needed unpacked. It had pictures (walls) it had everything I didn't get to before crashing. 

Now I am better and I want that done!  Paint and put the bed together etc. We pulled everything out. I have no need for twin comforters and duvets since I sold the twin beds. I wish I had these at that time I would have made her a deal to sell those with the beds.

Anyhoo we pulled everything out. Some things piled in the hall.

Most are in the foyer/living room. I have a throw-away pile, a sell pile, a what the hell do with do with this pile? Stacks of books that I may ask the library about (cookbooks) The list is long and it is spread all across my house. Will it get done by 10a tomorrow? Not likely. It is what it is I suppose.

Thankfully she has been to my other house many times and she knows I am not a hoarder or messy so she will just have to deal with it. She was warned. 

I just don't care for people just stopping by. I mean a friend for a quick visit or something but honestly my family always has to stay overnight.

I told her we have something Thursday night. That got us off the hook.

And we do. Which I am sure will be a blog post because this event we are going to is definitely new age and different. 

Anyway -

I mean she gave me a day's notice I suppose that is good but...

I feel like this a lot lately. 

YIPEE

Hi, I'm an idiot.

As I mentioned in a previous post my doctor's office canceled my appointment with the shoulder/ortho doctor twice. They suggested another doctor since I wanted to see someone quickly. We discussed the time and I recall saying around the same time would be great if possible. She said we can do that. End of call.

They text me a reminder & to confirm and they said the address and time again. But the idiot I am didn't bother to read it. I pulled a "rick" 

I hit the yes to confirm and went about my life.

I get there at 10:45am Tuesday morning for my 11am appointment. 

I check in and she says, your appointment is now at 2pm. Oh no!  

I take out my phone as she is searching the computer. 

I see clearly that it stated in the text to be there at 1:30 with a 2pm appointment.  I sighed.  I'm an idiot.

I tell her that I see what I did. She said, yes but we canceled on you twice and I see that she has you down for 11a with Dr. D. which says canceled but wasn't removed, and then they put you in here for 2p with Dr. M. 

So it's no one's fault, we all screwed up it appears.

Wow. 

I told her that was very generous of her because I'm the idiot here. 

I asked her if I could just make another appointment and not sit here until 2pm. 

She replied, "Would you be willing to see Dr. M's P.A. (physician's assistant) 

I told her that I'm not having surgery today so that is just fine.  

She then said they could get me in at 11:15AM.  

I told her that was fine I can wait that long.   Whew.

I did not want to drive back home and come back.

I was called back at 11:10a. Great! That never happens.

While getting dressed in the morning I assumed they would want X-rays.

So I thought instead of my normal underwire bra I should wear a sports bra with no wires. As I am getting dressed and putting on my sports bra, my husband comes in and inquires, "Aren't you going to the Drs? You never wear a sports bra out of the house."  

Good God people when it comes to my all boobs this man is sure observant. 

If I had asked him to look away and tell me what pants I was wearing or if my hair was on fire he'd have no idea. 

I swear boobs are eye magnets for this man.

I digress...

I am brought back to a room at the doctor's office and she gives me a gown and tells me to take off my bra with wires. I told her I wore my sports bra for that very reason. She said, good deal, keep it on!  Hey, I'm old, I've been through this before. I prefer to wear something under that dreadful gown.

She tells me to tie the gown at the top and side. I say okay and she leaves. Well, I am fighting with this gown. And it hurts like hell. I can't feel the string/tie and just before I am about to take it off to see it upfront she walks in.

She comes in and says, "Having a hard time?"  

I said, "it's not nice to mess with the patients telling them to tie this behind them when they can't move their shoulder that way and I can't find a tie string."  She laughs and tells me to turn around and she'll do it for me. 

Then in the sweetest southern accent says, "oh dear. I'm so sorry, the tie is ripped off no wonder you were struggling. I'm so sorry. That hurt too didn't it? Ooh, I'm so sorry"  

I said, "I was beginning to think you guys were messing with me"  

She laughed and said, "Oh honey, Not yet!"

I went for X-rays and had my pictures taken. 

They take me back to the room.

A beautiful redhead comes in who I swear is a child. She is gorgeous with Julianne Moore's red hair and green eyes. She was so nice. We viewed my X-rays and she believes this pain is a very bad case of arthritis. Gee great.

She showed me the "shards" as she called them. That even sounds painful. We went through why she felt this and showed me things. It was not anything with my rotator cuff which I already knew because the pain was in a different place but again I'm no doctor.

We decided that a shot of cortisone was going to be a good place to start along with Rx anti-inflammatory drugs. (YAY, YAY, YAY)

She asked if I did anything recently to cause it to hurt more.  I said yes I was painting yesterday but quit early and made my hubby finish because it made this bark and last night it had a heartbeat. 

She said no painting, Drs orders for 3 days. Okay if I must. 

She saw that I had been on chemo and steroids and she asked about that. She said I bet nothing hurt when you were on the steroids. Well...I didn't feel great with them and chemo but I know you mean my joint pain. Yes, I had no joint pain in my hands, feet or shoulders as I normally have but as soon as I stopped it all came roaring back unfortunately.  

Physical therapy she told me wasn't an option for this. (again, YAY!) 

So I got a shot.

It felt great but once the lidocaine wore off I am hurting a bit more right now. But in a couple days, it should be great if this is the issue. I hope so. I know you can't do many cortisone shots because it will weaken the joint area so I hope it works and lasts a full year. It would sure help me to sleep.

If this doesn't do the trick I know next will be an MRI which I HATE.

It's like being buried alive. 

In all honestly once I turned 51 it's been a medical crap shoot. WTH?

As I told you Dr. Tall Tan and Gorgeous told me at 51 that the warranty was out on my parts. This was all normal. It doesn't feel normal.

But here's the good thing. I am learning my way around Raleigh just by going to my doctor's appointments. 

Now isn't that just damn sad and pathetic!😀

The Blog

The Ortho group seeing me for my shoulder asked for my films and any info on my shoulder repair.  I called my former doctor's office and they have no record of me having this surgery. They kept asking me dates of which I knew none. I can barely remember when it's garbage day how the hell do you expect me to remember what year and month it was that I had rotator cuff surgery.

The woman on the phone told me they had a ransomware attack and they have nothing before 2008. Great. I can't remember the dates and they say I don't exist. She again asked my doctor, I told her Dr. Tan Tall and Gorgeous and she said she didn't find me under his records. Not even for my torn meniscus, I asked? Oh, there I was for the knee in 2016. Whew. 

I was beginning to think I just dreamt all this and Dr. TT&G.

I told her I would try to find dates and get back to her.

Well, I came to the blog. I'm glad I share everything because I found out when my surgery was for my arm. I found out the exact date of my surgery for both my arm and my knee. Yipee for the blog. I knew I existed!

I called back and told her that indeed my shoulder surgery was in 2007.  She suggested I call the hospital where it was done to at least get the surgery notes for this new doctor which I will do on Monday morning. 

In other news.

When we had Izzy she had trouble with our hardwood floors. Before the flooding we had hardwoods. She'd slip and slid but she was young and we dealt with it. Then after the 2nd flood we went with LVP since we were tired of replacing hardwoods and this would be far better than wood (LVP is luxury vinyl planks) These floors were worse in regards to slipping. For everything else they were fabulous. But Izzy had a hard time getting up off the floor with them when she was older. She slipped a lot. 

In talking to our neighbors we found that all with dogs had the same issues if they had LVP or hardwoods. Rick tried the socks on her feet. Izzy would have NONE of it. We tried a good many products but none lasted or she would tear them off.

Rick and our vet were talking about the need for something. He too sees so many dogs coming in from slipping on these floors and tearing an ACL or hurting themselves in some way. He said it has become a real issue. Rick was sharing with him what he was trying to do. The vet, Dr. M, told him that if he came up with something he'd love to test it for him. 

Rick contacted Dr. M with a couple of questions earlier in the week and he called Rick back Friday night. They were chatting about this and every question Dr. M asked Rick had an answer. I could hear Dr. M. say, "man the only thing left is the SPCA.  I'm excited about this Rick. I just love when a dog owner sees a need and invents something. After you speak to them, keep me posted via email or call me." 

Rick and our vet Dr M. bonded from the very beginning. I just saw this wonderfully compassionate vet and the oh-so-handsome man who adored our dog. Previous vets were never this thoughtful with our dog and he adored her. He told us he'd adopt her if we ever - we stopped him and said, we'd never!  Once while in the room he kept holding her and petting her and loving on her and I was thinking, "hey this is our dog" but Izzy was loving it. She loved men. And she was a whore for love from them. 

I said after our first day of meeting him that he was like Rick's brother. Both are tall, dark, handsome, and funny. Both played drums and they both talked about music, drums, and dogs. Rick said if he wasn't my vet I'd ask him to go get a beer with me. That kind of guy.

Well, Rick has been working on this even though our dog is gone. 

When we dog sat we saw the issues Mikey was having getting up from the floor or going around the island. We asked if he had this issue at their house and they said, "OH MY GOODNESS YES!"  We asked if we had something would you let us try it on Mikey. They said yes.

Rick finally found a substance that is sticky but doesn't leave a stain, doesn't make you stick to the floor, it just grips it, it doesn't wash off either. You only need a smidge on the side of their paws to work. It dries quickly. 

This is used to adhere prosthetics to human skin. 

So we know it isn't harmful to human skin but what about dogs?

But what we do need to know is if it is toxic if ingested? 

If you use it for a long time will the build-up hurt the dog? 

So Rick is now contacting the company for the MSDS info (Material safety data sheet) the MSDS basically will outline all the ingredients in it. Then he will go to the SPCA poison center with this list so they can tell him if this will or will not harm a dog long term. Dr. M gave Rick a contact and told him if he can to speak to them about this and what you're doing. They should be very helpful.

Dr. M said once he does all that and gets the okay then he is all set to try it on his own dogs.

Dr. M also asked Rick how we were liking it here. Rick was honest. He started with no vet like him. I heard Rick tell him that when Izzy was dying we called the vet's office and were told we had to wait a couple of days before we could get in to euthanize her. He gasped. We told him we knew that wasn't something we could do so Rick explained what we did end up doing. He was so glad we did. Then he said, "God that was one special dog." (yep we know)

He also told Rick that the traffic up there in the past year has gotten worse. He lives 11 miles from the office and it takes him 1 hr 10 minutes. He said it is getting so very big with all the companies building here that you left at the right time. They talked about housing and how this tiny house up there would be 1.2mil in the same neighborhood we used to live. When we told him it was less than 400K here he laughed and said for 400K you wouldn't get more than an empty plot of land here. We know!  He told Rick that his wife and he talk about retirement and how they can get a boatload of money out of their house now but what could we buy? (we know that too!) He said for the first time we too are thinking of leaving the area and we sure don't want to do that but...

We understood. Then he added, but hell you've got great medical down there.

Yep, and we've used it already. 

I shake my head at Rick and all his tinkering. He talks about this chemical and that substrate and let me tell you, my eyes glaze over. He is always tinkering with some idea and working on something. 

It sure keeps him busy though. In retirement, I don't know what he'd do if not tinkering. 

But beginning on Monday I told him he has to work with me on that bedroom. It's been a year now. We have to take everything out of there. Unpack those damn few boxes and make piles. What to sell. What to toss. What to keep. I kept the door shut for a year. I'm better now so I have no excuse except laziness. I want this done before spring because our yard and house outside are in dire need of work. I want this done before we start that huge project. And I want some help doing this. I'll paint the room myself but the rest I'd like him to be helping me with it all. It's his stuff too.

I honestly hate selling all this stuff. Not because I want to keep them. Because it's a pain in the ass to sell stuff. I wish someone I knew would just come shopping in my home and take things. When my niece was in Raleigh a few weeks ago I was telling her something I was selling and she gasped. 'But Aunt Peggy those are so nice.' I asked if she wanted them. She said my God I would love all that stuff. Okay, find a way to get them out of my house. See? That's the problem. You live in Florida. The others live in PA. 

I live in a tiny house now. I need to purge all this shit no matter how much I love it. No matter that it was expensive. 

No matter anything - it all must go.

SOLD

I read a Toronto online newspaper. 

I read a few weeks ago about a couple who went on a vacation/holiday and came home to find out their house was sold out from under them. 

Someone pretended this home was theirs or a realtor was involved in the scam,  I am not certain, the story was convoluted. But nonetheless, this is in court and the owners of the home are not allowed into their home.

Friday morning I read there was another house sold in Toronto but in the nick of time, this was stopped and discovered. In this article they named the realty office that was involved. It did not mention if they were involved but it was left as something they were looking into but didn't think so right now.

How does this happen is what I want to know?

Are the agents involved or hoodwinked? How do the scammers know the people are not home? So many questions. Are there showings? Photos for online? 
It's a head-scratcher, isn't it?
I do not like my new house in NC. But if someone sold it from under me I wouldn't be happy either for a multitude of reasons.

Have you heard of such a thing? 

Funeral Flash Mob

I don't know her but her death hit me.

As you know who have been reading me for years know I love to watch the award shows for the clothes. As I have aged the actors/actresses have not, so most of these "kids" I don't know and frankly don't much care. 

They don't dress all that well most often and think showing everything you've got is the way to go, which means very little clothing to see. 

"Who are you wearing?"

"My birthday suit from God"* (*insert higher power you believe in) 

Remember Cher's outfit that garnered gasps from the Oscars, I think it was a Bob Mackie "gown" 

Cher had on way more clothes than most the young women wear today on the red carpet. But some were fabulous. Heidi Klum - not so much. Who does she think she is a supermodel or something? 😉

Since the Golden Globes were on regular TV, the dish network will record all prime-time shows from 8 to 11p and put them all in a folder called Prime Time. We normally will watch them later and then we can also by pass the commercials.  I did not watch it live this year or I'd have driven off a cliff. 

But I did go back the next day and FF through stuff. I stopped and watched what I wanted to watch. Rick was in the room but not paying any mind to the TV unless I made a comment then he would look up.

Rick and I both liked the movie Elvis and thought Austin Butler should win as he did. They interviewed Lisa Marie Presley on the red carpet and she was wobbly and looked awful. Pale, her hair looked dry and she held on to someone as she walked to and fro. I pointed it out to Rick and he looked up. We wondered if she was sick or if she was just having a bad day. Or just a celebrity being a weird celebrity. One never knows. But she did not look like herself or well. 

Then to find out she died today. Wow, that blew my mind. 

I wonder if she was ill that night. If that is why she was talking so slowly and moving the way she was moving. It's just all so sad, isn't it?  She was only 55 years old. Granted she lived longer than her dad but not much longer.

She said in a recent interview I read that she has had to endure enough death in her life since the age of 9 to last many lifetimes. Her dad and her son to name just 2 of them. 

RIP Lisa Marie. 

In another bizarre story I read. A woman named Sandi who was a bit of a rebel (that's what her friends called her) made arrangements for her funeral when she found she was going to die. 

She hired a dance troupe to do a flash mob at her funeral to the song, 

Another One Bites The Dust by Queen. Apparently many, many dance troupes refused. But they found one who would do it since it was her request for her funeral. 

I laughed and at the same time was a tiny bit horrified. 

If that is what she wanted that is what she should have. 

The video showed the people in the church gasping when the music came on then some stood up and took off their coats and began to dance. 

Can you imagine being at a funeral and everyone around you is weeping and then the music comes on? You see one, then 2 people stand up and dance in place. Before you know it others are dancing. You can see the 'what the hell is going on here' looks on everyone's faces. By the middle of the song, everyone is clapping and moving to the music. What a hoot. 

She also had her casket arrive late on purpose. She said she was always late in life so why stop now. 

Sandie had a sense of humor that is for sure. 

I handed my phone to Rick to read this and then he closed it. 

I can't find it now to post it here. I'm sure if you want to see it it's somewhere if you google it.  

I know my plans are very, very different from what my family does or would want. But it's my life and my death. 

As Frankie said, "I did it my way!"

Round of Cortizone for Everybody!

I know if you've been coming around these parts you've heard me speak of my Dr. Tan, Tall and Gorgeous. He was the surgeon who fixed my torn meniscus and who repaired my torn labrum and rotator cuff over the years. 

My same shoulder is bothering me again and I don't understand why. 

Painting about kills me. (yes, my right arm) It is not the same pain as my rotator cuff so I think that's good. Everything I do including pulling up my underpants is difficult and painful. I came out of the bathroom with my pants up on the left but on my right side, my pants and underwear were almost up and all scrambled. 

I stood there struggling. 

So what does Rick do? He offers to pull up my pants.

No, you'll pull them down I tell him. He promises me he won't and he snickers. No, I'll get it, I say as I am twisting and struggling and in pain. 

But Mr has to fix everything came over and pulled them up correctly. 

I was in shock.

I said to him that I didn't think he had it in him. I mean when I had rotator cuff surgery you could never put on my bra, only take it off etc. He laughs and said, "well I can't have you going out today with your pants all twisted it's a poor reflection on me."

OMG, I had just taken a sip of coffee and I did a spit take. 

"A poor reflection on YOU?" 

Oh my goodness you are an ass. But a funny one. 

You see I have used that phrase from my parents on Rick when he is all disheveled and he thinks nothing of going out in public with the stains on his shirt that looks like he took it out of the hamper it's so wrinkly, etc. 

So he just had to give it back to me. Touche and good one Mr. H.

Tuesday morning I made an appointment with a new Ortho doctor. 

A different one from my broken ankle this past year. (wally cox) 

I didn't pick him at first because he was so handsome but then I read his bio and boy this man has worked at as well as having had fellowships at prestige hospitals, graduated top of his class, and went to great medical schools (not in Guatemala) and he had over 180 reviews and only 1 was a 4 star. 

The 4-star review complained about the practice's front desk and nothing bad about the doctor. None had the reviews this man had or the awards so I went with another handsome ortho doc.

So if he's tall I may have myself another Dr. Tall Tan and Gorgeous. 

Okay, he is not gorgeous like Dr. N. but he is good looking and his picture is very tan. What is with that? Like George Hamilton Tan.

Honestly, these sports medicine docs are always tan and good-looking. 

I guess it is from all the outdoor sporting events they do.

I picture all of them swooshing down the mountains in winter snowboarding and golfing in the summer and running marathons because they are always outside they are perpetually tan. 

Oh you know, like those maxi-pad commercials or tampon commercials. They make having your period look like such fun, frolicking in the pool, doing a triathlon, and surfing at the beach. LIES. All lies I tell ya.

All I know is I hope he is skilled and I hope he can make me feel better with a cortisone shot. It was bad while in the heat of chemo and steroids but I felt so bad all over that the pain didn't stick out as much as it does now? 

I know that probably makes no sense to you. Pfff. 

In my twisted mind, it makes total sense!

I tried to ignore it I really did. I told you that the final straw for me with the torn rotator cuff and labrum was when I couldn't pick up my Gin and tonic with my right hand, and I'm right-handed. THAT finally made me go to see a doctor. This time I can't hold my coffee mug comfortably. I also can't dress easily. I can use it which I couldn't do when I tore my labrum and rotary cuff but it hurts like hell. Putting on a top over my head is so painful I am asking for help. Not good.  

It always wakes me up in the middle of the night and usually I can't go back to sleep after that.

I know I shouldn't wait until it's this unbearable. Ah, but what fun would that be?  My entire last year was medical issues. I just don't want to find another one damn it. 

I need a month of absolutely no doctors in my life.

That shouldn't be so much to ask for.

No Dr.Tall Tan and Gorgeous or no to a Dr.Short Pasty and Tubby! 

Nada.