Short People Got No Reason...🎵

My feet have never touched the floor when sitting on anything.

I once had an interview that was extremely important to me. I met the woman at the Mayflower Hotel in DC. She and her team were in DC for a 3-day conference, so it was arranged that, since I lived there to meet there for the final interview instead of flying to Boston.

We sat in this big lounge area. 

We were in an area that had tables with very high-backed upholstered chairs.

Our table was a bit to the side of us, so neither of us had our legs under the table.

I sat on the edge of my seat with my legs crossed at my ankles. Hands in my lap. She kept telling me to relax and sit back. 

I said once, "Oh, I'm comfortable, thank you." 

The 2nd time she told me to sit back, I asked, "Is it bothering you if I don't sit back?"  

She told me it was making her uncomfortable.

So I said, "Okay, then I'll move back, but now you can't laugh."  

I smiled, and she looked at me like I was so not getting this job.

I sat all the way back in this big chair.  

My feet were so far off the ground, and my knees were above the seat cushion. Thank God I was wearing slacks. I looked like Edith Ann.

I felt ridiculous and embarrassed.  

I said, "I don't appear as authoritative now, do I?"

She laughed, apologized, and laughed some more. 

I went back to sitting as I was originally and said, "So you can't not give me this position after I humiliated myself."

She said, "You're right."

I got the job. But if I had been 5'8", I would have too.

You get it, short people can't reach anything except the baseboards.

When I was a kid, my father, the plumber, came home with this new toilet, and it hung from the wall. It had no pedestal. 

It was the same ghastly green color as our tub and sink. 

He probably got it for free. 

Or it "fell" off a truck, and some guy gave it to him. uh huh.

Anyhoo, being that it wasn't on the floor, I had to have a stool to get up and down.

When I got older, I did not need a stool to get on or off; I could jump. 

However, dangling legs and feet when sitting to do your business isn't fun either.

Then, as I got older, I realized that even on a commode that was a normal pedestal toilet, when I sit on it, my feet do not sit flat on the floor. My toes touch the floor. 

So imagine my surprise when we got to our hotel last week and I rushed in from the car to use the bathroom.  I went to sit down, and I turned around because it wasn't there.  The toilet was so low to the ground. Was this a grade school toilet?

But then I sat, and oh my goodness, my whole foot was flat on the floor.  

I came out of the bathroom and said, "My God, that is what you people have had all your life?" Rick thinks it's funny. What the hell does he know he's over 6'

That week, I only used that bathroom. 

Or as my Big Guy called it, 'the baby potty'

I don't care what he called it; my feet touched the floor for the first time in my life that I can even remember.  

I had blocks on my tricycle for pete's sake, just so I could reach the pedals.

You all just don't understand when you're a normal height. I'd give anything to be 5'10" and I'd wear heels! 

My next life - tall, thin, and blonde.  I just know those bitches get everything!

Meatballs

Rick made meatballs on Wednesday.

Rick made enough meatballs for a family of 6 with teenage boys!

Rick likes to cook in mass quantities when he cooks. The only time that was to his advantage was when he cooked at the city mission. 

A vat of anything was perfect there and he was in heaven. 

Rick's meatballs are delicious.  

As close to my grandmothers as anyone has tried.

Many years ago, when my grandmother was having a difficult time standing for hours in the kitchen, she wasn't cooking as much as we were all used to.

One day, Rick asked her if he could buy all the ingredients to bring to her house, and could she show him how to make her meatballs?  

He told her she could sit at the kitchen island and tell him what to do.  

They did just that.

He brought over everything she told him to buy.

I watched her walk him through it all. She was so cute and patient.

I learned she soaked the bread in milk.

No bread crumbs, she claimed it made them hard and dry.  Okay then.

He put them in a pan as he was told and poured tomato sauce over them.

They baked for the allotted time, and voila, they were tremendous!!!

Once home, he made them a month later. The exact same way!

Almost, but not quite.  We kept wondering what it was that he did wrong.

He was damned determined to make these like her because she was not going to be around for long and someone had to make these meatballs. The family loved them.

We called them Grandma Gertie's Garlic Balls. Her name was not Gertie, it's a goofy name my dad gave her, and I don't recall the story behind it. 

Anyway, as the title of her meatballs says, GARLIC.

When I found out how much garlic was in these, I almost died.

No one would know or did know, for that matter.  Is that the flavor we like? 

The fresh parsley? She would say it had to be fresh, not dried.  The parm? 

The pork/veal/burger combo? What was it, and what did he miss?

Over the years he has made these and each time he eats one he says, "Damn close but not her meatballs."

Once we were at a family gathering, and Rick brought them to the house. 

Grandma had passed at this point.  

My sisters and parents loved the meatballs, but they just were missing something, maybe?  What is different? So damn close my dad would say.  

We all devoured them because they were damn good.  Nothing like a great meatball hoagie.  My niece said it was the love that was missing. 

"Hey, Rick said, I put love into them." Everyone just laughed.

Who knows what she did, but Rick's are a 9 and Grandma's are a 10.

So Wednesday night, Rick had a big ole meatball hoagie with melted mozz, and he was in heaven.  

I had just the 2 meatballs plus some caprese salad.  

I went back for a 3rd, oink oink.

They are so damn good but I wish Grandma told us the secret not just the recipe. 

😋

Sun and Sand

Our resort was said to be at the end of an inlet.

Nothing around us but water, sand and sand dunes.

All rooms were facing the ocean, and all balconies faced the ocean.

There was a bar and a restaurant.

An outdoor and indoor pool.

I read the reviews, did TripAdvisor, etc. 

Sounded good.

From the moment of check-in, we found everyone to be very professional, friendly, and helpful. 

Our room was a small 1-bedroom 1.5 bath condo-type setting with a kitchenette. We had a stove top and microwave as well as all you'd need for a vacation.  It was well stocked. 

We had a nice small balcony and we loved sitting there in the evening.

Or when Chatty Cathy was driving us nuts.

Rick loves seafood. I don't eat seafood. This was seafood heaven.

Since this was his birthday, it was all about him. We ate at a place that was highly recommended by the hotel staff, and it was everything Rick wanted it to be.  If Rick eats a lot of seafood and has drinks, he will get gout. 

He brought his gout medicine - that was his solution. 

He knew he was going to have lots of fresh seafood, and he did. 

Angry Mussels, the best scallops he's ever had, some kind of fish and of course shrimp.  

I had a steak and salad. :-)

I wish I had brought my camera because my phone just doesn't do it.

One evening, I awoke at 2am, but I thought it was like 6am. There were no clocks anywhere. Phones were in the kitchen on the table, charging.

I was going to let Rick sleep, so I went into the master bath and, in the dark, got my toothbrush and paste to bring to the 1/2 bath so I didn't wake Rick.

I brushed my teeth and walked into the kitchen/living area, and I saw out the patio door that it was pitch black out. I went to the table and got my phone, and saw it was only 2:23am.  OMG. I was wide awake. I sat on the balcony and attempted to take a photo of the glorious moon beam on the water. It was spectacularly beautiful. The phone camera speed was not fast enough for me to get an unblurred photo of the moon.  I gave up and left my phone in the room for the majority of the time.

The weather was fabulous the entire time.

Rick's birthday falls in the low season.  Low season is when it's cheaper. The price of the room went up $200 a night beginning on Memorial Day Weekend.  

Normally, low or off-season is not the best weather, but being in the south, it was hot.

It was 80s/90s and low humidity. Can't beat that for the beach.

And since that doesn't last long around these parts, we enjoyed every minute of it.

Soon enough, that dreaded high humidity will be here.

It was exactly what Rick wanted and said he needed.  Swimming, sun, and toes in the sand.  We spent a lot of time at the pool, honestly. We explored the area from dinner time on. We took a wrong turn to a restaurant and saw a bit more of Wrightsville Beach, North Carolina, than we planned to see.

But an adventure. Not a single road signs, and the roads are not straight.

We asked about the signs and the road, and the woman at the front desk told us that is how they keep us there. She laughed.  

I said, "So like Hotel California."  She said, Exactly! You're the first one who got that." (I seriously doubt that)

She said that is the biggest complaint from all visitors. So I guess it wasn't just us. Then criss cross over each other and no signs and it was just a crap shoot. Thankfully, we enjoyed staying at the resort. 

One afternoon, Rick was on the beach.  I was a bit further away. I see all these young women go by him in thongs. I laughed and thought to myself, Happy Birthday, Fella.  

When he came back to where I was he told me that the one girl had her whole butt tattooed. I saw that I said.  I asked if he was reading it since he was staring for so long. He laughed and said, "Yes, that was exactly what I was doing."   I just shake my head.  Enjoy the scenery boy, is my thought.

Rick said, outside of being 70, he really enjoyed this birthday.

That's all I was going for.

Memorial Day.

 

People Repellant

Why? Why do we attract such creatures?

We are just looking for some time to reflect, relax, laugh, and enjoy the ocean.

And we did those things, but there was a fly in our ointment.

I'll start the blog with the worst and go back to the best on the next day.

Rick said as we parked the car - here's to another adventure together.

Our hotel was on the ocean. 

All rooms at this place were oceanfront. 

There was an outdoor pool, bar, restaurant and a set of stairs to the sand with a landing.  Not too many steps it was perfect for Rick.

Her name was Chatty Cathy. 

She was very tall.  I know everyone is taller than me, but she was the same height as Rick at 6'1" (yes, he shrank). She was LOUD, she was very southern, and we couldn't shake this woman.  

We had come up from the beach, and there on the landing was a shower. 

For everyone returning to their resort/room, they rinse off their feet, etc. 

Across from this shower is a bench.  I was sitting on this bench as Rick was rinsing his legs and feet. This loud woman gets to the last step and says something to me that I don't understand.  

I say, "Pardon me?"  Oh, she was loud, but her Georgia accent was deep, man. I needed it said one more time.

Rick turned around because he was done, and she looked at him and said, "Bob! Where have you guys been?" 

Rick: I'm sorry, my name is not Bob, it's just a T-shirt.  

He looks over at me and gives me the look of, "This woman is nuts." I smile.

"Okay, we have to go," and grab Rick's hand and turn our backs, and begin to walk the boardwalk to the hotel.

She followed us and talked the whole way.

'She's a nurse, you know, her husband is around here somewhere, oh, he doesn't like to go to in ocean, he's probably reading a book.' (he's hiding from her I'm certain)

Never taking a breath or being asked anything, she just blurted shit out.

We never said one word. 

We got to the elevator and she acted like a middle school girl and she shrieked, "I'm going up too!"  Rick squeezed my hand. We both smirked, and I was trying not to laugh, and I knew he was doing the same. We just kept our eyes down because if we looked at one another again it would be over!

She pressed the button that said 2. OH MY GOD WE ARE ON 2!

Rick held the elevator door for her, I got off too, and he made a noise, and when I finally turned back to him, he was getting off. Boy, I missed the cue, stupid Peg, he was trying to get me back on the elevator and ride it a bit to get rid of her.  

I apologized for being a ditz, but she'd know we'd be coming back eventually, I told him. I also think she is one of those who might still be there when the elevator doors open hours later. Rick laughed at that and said, "Like a horror movie, the doors open and she is still there and she's still talking and no one is there!! 

Exactly!

(After a few days, we KNEW she was that person)

We were enjoying lounging at the pool one afternoon. Rick was in the pool when I heard him say, "Margaret."  He just yelled my name, he knew I'd look up.  I saw her at the gate. I buried my nose in my book.  I put on my hat.  God love him for warning me.  Rick went underwater.  She saw us.  OMG. 

At one point, I told her we'd like to be alone; it's a special week for us. 

"Oh sure, she says, I'm here on my anniversary too."

I never said it was our anniversary, blogger friends, but I didn't correct her either.  And she just sat there. She sat there and yammered. This woman does not know my name, oh, she told me hers, but I don't recall because I do not care. We called her Chatty Cathy from day 1.

Rick finally got out of the pool, realizing she isn't going to budge.

He comes over and grabs his towel, and says, "We picked this corner to be alone, do you mind giving us some privacy?"  She said, "no, like I told your wife, I'm here on my anniversary too," AND SHE JUST SAT THERE.

Now I see Rick gathering all of our things.  

He says, "I'm going up, Margaret, wanna join me?"

"Yep"  

I said bye, and Rick had a fit. I didn't want to be rude, and he said, "WTF do you think she is being?"  He was not having this woman on his beach time.

We grabbed a drink and went upstairs and sat on our balcony for a bit and just laughed.  Why us?  Can we spray some repellent on us to keep that away? I'd bathe in it at this point.

The next day, she sees him. Rick has on his "I've had a stroke, what's your excuse?" shirt.  She comes over and slaps his chest so hard I thought his pacemaker would pop out. Rick grabbed her hand and not nicely said, "Don't ever do that to me, got it?"   I froze.

She ignored him and plowed on as if it didn't happen - "You have not had a stroke, I'm a nurse, I'd know."  

He just smiled and walked away.  

She asked me if he was feeling ok. 

I told her he was fine, but I think she needs to back off, okay?  

She did not follow us but had a few more comments for us, "Oh, since his stroke, does he not like crowds, a lot of stimuli, etc? I've heard of that can happen before".

I told her yes. I lied. I'm going to hell.  He just couldn't stand this woman always being around and interrupting and showing everyone at the bar her boo-boo. No one cared!!

The next day he had on a nice swim shirt, and she said, "You're boring today."  Rick kept walking, and she was next to him in no time.  

We see her husband, and he walks over.  Chatty Cathy begins to tell him how boring Rick's shirt is today.  Rick gave her husband a look, and God love that man, he understood, grabbed his wife. 

Rick nodded, and he did too, and poof, she was gone. 

I don't know what kind of man speak that was but it was damn impressive!

As Rick said later, "If he were around more, we wouldn't be bothered, but if that was with me 24/7, I wouldn't be around much either." 

Oh she was a royal pain in the ass but we joked about.  

We had chatty cathy sayings the whole time we were there.

Rick was in rare form.

On our last morning in the hotel restaurant, we had breakfast before hitting the road.  She walked in and came over to us immediately and Rick is whispering, Don't look, don't look, no eye contact.  I'm trying not to laugh or smile, he is not helping me!

I'm laughing—but not looking. We could feel her getting close, and her hubby was with her. Rick just leaned in and kissed me, hoping she'd get the hint. But nothing gave her a hint. She says, "Oooh, how nice, look, honey. He just leans over at breakfast and kisses her...and she goes on."

On the way home, Rick said that there could be an SNL skit with a character like her bothering people. 

The skit would be an ad to sell People Repellent. 

Next, the good stuff.  

Wednesday

Rick has been having some side effects from the ole stroke.

He went to the doctor, and he told Rick, "Well, that happens after a stroke."

Rick said, "I gather that, but how do we deal with this, or what can be done to help with this or can anything be done?"

Doctor:  I don't know.

Well, that's helpful.  

Now looking for specialists. A stroke is a gift that keeps on giving.  

Rick will be having a big birthday on the 19th.

He hates this birthday, he tells me.

I tell him the number sucks but I'm glad he is alive to celebrate it.

I got a 'hmpf'

In 6 months or so, I'll be feeling the same way. 

But instead of going into hiding like me, Rick wants to stick his toes in the sand. We are both beach people, so I am taking him to the shore for his birthday. I booked a hotel where all the rooms are small condos. 

The hotel is on the ocean, and there are two pools, one inside and one out.

Since it's 90 degrees, we'll be doing the outside pool. Neither he nor I wishes to dip our toes in the ocean. We saw a report last evening on the local news of a shark close to the shore. They were warning people for the upcoming Memorial holiday weekend. 

Nope, no ocean for me anymore.  

I prefer to feed the fish and not be the food.

Because Rick can't walk a lot, or for a long time,  I am not certain what we are doing, so I am playing it by ear. I have done my research on things to do. But we haven't traveled since his stroke, so I'm prepared for everything...I think.

Because it only takes 1.5 -2 hours to get there, we are betting on 2hrs since we aren't sure of where we are going. 

He is very excited.  It's cute. 

Because he has lost 75 lbs, we spent the day trying to find a bathing suit to wear. I got him a new one last year for the Y.  Thankfully, it still fits.  

He pulled out all his swim trunks. Some that were way too small last year, and some that we think will now be way too big.

I sat on the bed as Rick did a fashion show. He stomped out of the closet like a runway model and made me laugh. But what I laughed at was as he ''model stomped' into the bedroom, his swim trunks fell off. Okay, those are too big.

He has 4 pairs that do not fit. All too big. 

I want to have his problem that everything is just too big. 

I forgot to post this one the other day.

I defy you to not sing this as you read it. (well if you're old enough)

I couldn't.

tRump dump

Some memes to remind us of the hell we're in.

I have never laughed at others' misfortunes, but I admit when I saw a trump voter who lost her job crying on TV, 'she never thought he'd do this to us' 

Clearly, she's just plain stupid. I'm awful because I smiled.

 

Enjoy your weekend.

This and That

 Today, 'a little this and a little that' as my grandmother used to say.

Let's start with, I have been released from my spine doctor's care.

I now begin Physical Therapy. YEAH. I can't wait to move more.

I called and must now wait until June 30th. Crazy

I am able to get in earlier if I wish to travel to do so. I don't want to drive 1 hr each way for PT.  I'll wait.

_________________

Do you wear gloves when planting and gardening?  I start out doing that, but I end up ripping them off. Then I spend the rest of the day cleaning my nails even after a shower. This time, Rick suggested I wear his surgical gloves that he wears in the workshop with his epoxy. So I did.  It was a lot better, but just before I was finished, my fingers went through a couple of glove fingers, and I got dirty anyway.  I say, just get in the soil and deal with the cleaning later. I prefer to feel what I'm doing, so I guess gloves just don't work for me.  But everyone has an opinion. A neighbor who cuts through our yard saw me the other day and said, "Oh, wear gloves, honey, your nails will be a mess if you don't."  (You read that with a southern accent, right?)  

__________________

I watched the new Tina Fey Netflix show, Four Seasons. It was okay. 

But if you watched the original one, don't watch this. 

It is not much like the original. 

What is the same is that it is 3 couples who take 4 vacations a year together. 

The issues with the couples are entirely different.

I liked it for what it was, and if I hadn't seen the original, I am certain this would have been higher on my list. 

The original is streaming, I'd suggest you watch that one instead.

It reminds me of the ole, "if you read the book, don't watch the movie."  

For me, that always ruins the movie.

Your thoughts?

______________________

Is it just me, or do any of you spend a good portion of your day looking for your phone or reading glasses, etc?  Just me?  Okay, well I do look for one of these every friggin' day. On a really good day, both. 

Sometimes the phone is in my boob or my glasses are on my head. 

I had Rick call me, and my left breast vibrated - FOUND IT.   

When I asked if he saw my glasses, he pointed to my head.

OMG. 

What is wrong with me? 

I recently had another injection into my eye and also got a new Rx for glasses.

Now I have only worn reading glasses up until now. But at this ripe old age, which is difficult for me to type or say without choking, I now need glasses as well as reading glasses or bifocals. A Shot to the Heart, as Jon Bon Jovi would say. I guess if I have to wear them all the time I will know where they are, but I think I'll opt for contacts and reading glasses.

When you're a kid, you just realize you're a kid. It's just carefree.

Why must I be told in one way or another daily that I have become an old person? What I thought at age 45 was that this age was elderly.

I'd go back and slap myself if I could. 

Then I'd slap Trump's mama and her ovaries.

_______________________

I was sent videos and Instagram links from a friend who said this couple was our twin, and she thought of Rick and me each time she saw them come up in her feed. Then I had a cousin in Florida send me a link after watching them dance in the kitchen saying, "this is the two of you, why aren't you making money?  I'll be your agent." 

I think they only remind people of us because they laugh at and with one another.  

But this one particular topic of the two of them is something that has been said in my home by Rick many many many times and we laugh because it's so damn true. 

The most recent one I can't embed because that is one I really wanted to share that was sent to me so many times 

My Annual Cinco de Mayo Post

I've got a busy day. So I am reposting my Cinco de Mayo story.

As we woke up Rick looked at me and said, "Happy 5th of mayonnaise babe." He tried to kiss me but I held up a finger. You guess which one.

He never let's it go.

I appear to be here for his fodder. 

Thursday, May 6, 2021

5th of Mayonnaise.

What did you do for Cinco de Mayo?

I spent hours looking for this subject because I assumed I must have written about it, in fact I swear I did. But it can not be found.

I grew up in a small town. It was a very damn big deal when the restaurant Chi-Chi's came to town. Back when this happened there weren't a lot of food choices in town. No Thai, no Mexican, no BBQ etc. 

Chi-chi-s was my first introduction to Mexican food. Hard to even imagine today but this was many moons ago.

Everyone went to Chi-Chi's if for no other reason but to get a margarita and eat some chips and salsa. Authentic Mexican cuisine, I think not. 

But I did not know that then. It was all new to me. 

When I made the move to a bigger city I was exposed to so many more food choices. When I began working in the travel industry that helped expose to a lot of foods and people which I loved!

But this day we were visiting Seattle.

We arrived at a Red Robin for a quick lunch in Seattle. 

On all the tables there were little placards saying Cinco de Mayo.  

From 6th grade Spanish I knew Cinco was 5. 

But 5 of mayonnaise? I didn't get it. 

I kept reading the placard and Rick asks me what is so interesting. I say, like a fool, what the hell is the 5th of mayonnaise?

He looked at me and in all seriousness says, "Margaret, you die your hair brown don't you?"  I know that meant to him I'm being a dumb blonde.

Nope, being a dumb brunette!  

Again I ask, "well, what is the 5th of mayo? I don't get it."  

He is laughing like a fool. I was getting a bit perturbed by him. 

When he came up for air he told me it was The 5th of May. He went on,

"It is a Mexican celebration about a battle they won over the French empire he thinks in the 1800's.  So it is celebrated on the 5th of May. 

Mayo= May Margaret. The 5th of May" Not mayonnaise.

Okay, who feels like the fool now. So of course I too am laughing at myself. 

That was so many moons ago but Rick brings it up every year. If you know him you are saying to yourself as you read this, "why of course he does"

Yesterday he text me and said since it is the 5th of mayonnaise how about taco's for dinner and some margaritas. Of course, that sounds fine to me.

But just once I wish he'd forget that I ever said that. But he won't. 

Picking on me is a sport where he is MVP.

So what did you do on your 5th of Mayonnaise? 

Dementia? or Uncoordinated?

Since moving and retiring, things have changed.

1. I could never sleep past 6am - who knew I could?

2. I could never imagine taking a nap at 3pm

3. I never knew I could be this lazy

4. I hurt everywhere. :-)

5. Since I had worked with Rick, I thought I could handle him underfoot 24/7. HA!

In all seriousness, Rick and I used to laugh daily. Even when we worked together. Most often, we were laughing at the customers, but we laughed nonetheless. Once a week, we'd have a good ole belly laugh that would leave us speechless.  

Then it all fell apart. Moved in late October. Izzy went over the rainbow bridge in February. I was told I had a mass on my retina. 6 months of chemo and high steroids. fun, fun, fun. 

Then, a fistula as well as the need to remove the sigmoid colon. Then a stroke. Then, spinal surgery and injections. Yes, it's been a laugh a minute since we moved here.

Rick was saying how the laughter in our home has been quiet. He misses it. I do too, but it's not like I was feeling like making him laugh when I was in so much pain. And nothing he could say most days did anything more than make me crack a smile. 

Then it happened.

We got up on Thursday and as Rick tends to do, he was looking at his cell as he made coffee. 

He showed me this video and said, "If you can do this, you don't have dementia."  

So there we are in the early morning over the coffee machine, trying this dumb thing.

We were laughing.

Rick says, "Apparently, I have dementia," and that for some reason that made me howl. Then he looked at me trying this while laughing, and Rick says, "Oh my, you are past dementia, is there a name for that? Just crazy?"  

Now, none of this is funny to read, but if you were trying this and began to laugh, it was just something we couldn't stop. It was a full-on belly laugh like the days before moving here. When we caught our breath, Rick said, "Well if we have it, we won't remember we do."  To which I added, "have what?"

OMG, there was laughter, some snorting and someone peed a little bit.

It felt good to be getting back to normal.

Today we have a date for popcorn, cocktails and a baseball game.

We will be meeting in the living room at 1pm.

It's so good to be feeling good again.

I tried to embed this video with no great luck.

If you have Instagram, click on the blue link and you will see the exercise you should try to see if you too have dementia.