You can call my husband any name in the book.
Nothing bothers him. But for some reason when these kids stated online that they should ask the elderly gentleman with the brown dog if he saw the dog that was missing because he was there.
That description of him made him go ballistic.
Now, this was months ago. He will still mumble this in utter disgust as he did last night. Rick and I were out taking a stroll with our dog. It was a perfect fall evening. We had a light dinner and then headed out for a walk.
We made our way to the park area where kids hang out. There is a path in the woods there that we have followed and found a bunch of logs set up around what looks like a firepit.
(Not the smartest thing to do in the woods)
There is always a bunch of litter and pot paraphernalia. As we walked back onto the path last night commenting on the great smell of fall leaves and trees we see these kids running.
I assumed because they were probably doing something they felt they shouldn't be doing. Then we hear another kid about 14 years old yell, no big deal just that elderly man and his dog. Hey, what about me? I'm standing right next to him? I said to Rick, "guess I'm not as old as you buddy" I'm cracking up.
Rick looked at me and said, "Damn it I don't even have any gray hair yet why are they calling me elderly?" The fact that these kids were running further into the woods away from us didn't concern him at all. It was the fact that they think he is an old fart. This is what pisses him off and makes me laugh.
I explained that to them you could be their grandpa so of course, you are elderly to them.
Rick says that my father is elderly not him.
Okay, big man, let me stroke your ego.
We turned around and left the path allowing the kids to continue smoking pot or whatever it was they were doing back there.
All the way home he mumbled and grumbled about being elderly.
As we came around a corner towards home, Rick's foot hit the sidewalk that was lifted up from a tree root. His foot caught it perfectly making him stumble. I grabbed his arm and said, "C'mon you old fart let me help you walk home"
Of course, I am laughing like crazy he was just mumbling.
I told Rick that all this mumbling is what an elderly person would do.
Yea, I was cracking myself up. He then says loudly with great enunciation, "I AM NOT THAT OLD, I CAN WALK HOME WITHOUT YOU SO LET GO OF MY ARM AND DAMN IT I AM NOT ELDERLY YET."
He too is now laughing as we 3 walked home.
When we got inside I saw an email telling me that one of our favorite comedians is going to be in town next Saturday. I read this out loud.
Rick said, "let's go that would be fun"
I replied, "Ooh, It starts at 10p"
mumble mumble mumble....
I ask, "too late for the elderly?"
Big sigh from Rick, "Damn it! It is."
12 comments:
Whahahahaha! Thats actuallly pretty adorable.
My rule #1: You're not elderly until a doctor asks you if you have throw rugs in the house. No kidding, it's on some of the questionnaires they ask on medicare forms.
I call myself elderly just to beat others to the punch. Then they say, "Oh, you're not old!" When my husband turned 50 he told everyone he was sixty then listened to them fawn all over him about looking so young for his age. He had a great game going there for a while. LOL
Jean, what do throw rugs have to with anything? Sort of like your husband I always say my age, but I do it so they don't think I'm older :-)
It's the same when people start to call you ma'am, we are all in the same boat, sigh!
Peg - Throw rugs are slip and fall hazards. Even with a backing on them you can still trip on the edges.
This post was a hoot. I laughed all the way through it. Thx.
Throw rugs are viewed as hazardous by the medical community. People slip/trip on them, especially elderly people. You should think about removing all of them for Rick's sake.
Margaret, actually throw rugs put a lot of elderly people in nursing homes because they shuffle walk, trip and fall on throw rugs. Give them the wrong throw rug answer and you'll get the "lecture." LOL
Oh those young whippersanappers! Now saying things like that is a sure sign . . . ouch.
I'm with Jean; I often joke out loud that I'm an old lady/old fart, etc. Better to jump the gun than be accused. LOL (plus, it's nice to do the set up to occasionally having someone else say 'oh, you aren't old yet!' I set 'em up, so that they can knock 'em down...)
Haha but 10 is pretty late lol
Im not elderly, but like Ive called myself and old biddy and an old fart. My husband use to turn to people and say "Mr Bomberger is my father, I'm John". And this was even with work underlings. I've decided that Ma'am and Mrs are okay, but dammit I am not your honey, sweetie or dear. Especially when you are like 20 something years old and you are waiting on me!
Oops, I did not read all the comments. Yes, small , low dogs and throw rugs are two of the primary causes of fall and injury. the only rugs I have after my bad fall (although it was outside) are the ones that are under furniture.
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