Friday, June 11, 2021

Adoption


 FLASHBACK FRIDAY

Click the link of flashback Friday to read this little ditty about Rick finding his birth mom and all the interesting things that brings.  He eventually found his father through ancestry.com when he did all that entails. He found he had 2 sisters and he found out his dad had passed 20 years earlier. This was written long before Rick found any other family members other than his birth mom.


11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, thank you for sharing. I've only started reading you but now I'll have to go back to older stuff.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Anonymous, thank you for stopping by. Skip years one and maybe 2 :-) Although they do lay out who I am and how I got here. Have a wonderful weekend.

Cruisin Paul said...

Oh my God Peg. I just want to give Rick a big hug. How can a woman act like that? Thank God that Rick has you Peg. There isn't much more then I can say but Rick seems to be a strong man. Give him my love. See ya.

Cruisin Paul

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Paul, thank God he had GREAT adoptive parents. Those are who he feels are his mom and dad. Some people shouldn't have children and this is one woman who should have tried birth control instead of having children and giving them up. (he has a half brother out there)

Bobi said...

This was an interesting read. I'm currently working through a situation with my father's wife. She is a lot like Sally and has spent their entire marriage trying to erase me from his life. Some people are just evil and toxic. My mom always said you can pick your friends but not your relatives. What she didn't teach me was how to extricate myself from the relatives who would not make worthy friends.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Bobi, I am so sorry to hear you have to deal with this type of person. I have them in my family too and I can't write about it because some know about my blog. No one in my family can keep their mouth shut so I get it. Does your father see this? Have you discussed this with him? For self reservation sometimes you have to eliminate them but that means your father and that makes you in a pickle! I'm so sorry.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

I meant self-preservation. :-)

BootsandBraids said...

Wow! I'm stunned that there are women like that out in the world. So cold, so devoid of feelings for others, especially towards a human being she gave birth to. Looking at the man Rick has become, due to the influence of his adoptive parents, I shutter to think how he'd have turned out under the care of his birth mom.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Boots, he always said he'd have ended up on jail for his rage and behavior against her.

betty said...

I'm so sorry Rick had this experience with his birth mom but I rejoice that his adoptive parents, especially his dad, had such a great influence on him and it seemed like he was raised very well by them. His birth mom was totally narcistic in my opinion with just wanting to talk about herself. Most people tend to know how to reciprocate in a conversation and ask questions about the other or at least not manipulate the conversation.

This post of yours from years back got to me. Both of my kids (now 35 and 32 years old) are adopted. They always knew they were and they knew when they turned 18 we would help them find their birth parents. Neither one at 18 wanted to but this past year through a variety of circumstances both came to find their birth parents' names. I always knew my daughter's birth mom's name (she is the 35 year old). We adopted her when she was a year old and she had some health problems so we got medical records from previous treatments. On one of the medical records they had not blacked out the birth mom's name so that's how I found out her name. I was able to confirm that was her name and find a yearbook picture of hers from high school and her grandmom's Facebook page. I have a tentative address of hers but for a variety of reasons for my daughter it was just best to give her the name of her birth mom and if she wanted to do more research it was up to her.

My son started having some health problems a few months ago and one of the things the doctors were investigating could be a hereditary thing. I suggested we try to find his birth parents to see if things ran in the family. He was born in Oregon and Oregon law says if an adoptee requests a copy of their preadoption birth certificate they can get it. So he filled out the papers and 8 weeks after he got the preadoption birth certificate with his birth parents' names on them. He text me a copy of it and I started looking on Google to see if I could find them. I did but it was interesting what I found. Because it is his story I'm reluctant to share it but sometimes stories like this don't have happy endings. I know he has siblings out there, both full and half, so one day we are going to do the Ancestry.Com to see what shows up. In the meantime his health problems have come under control for which I'm grateful.

I wasn't the best parent but we gave stability to both of the kids. That would have been missing if they had stayed with their birth parents I think. I am grateful their birth parents made the decisions they made at the time. It did give us the ability to raise a family :)

betty

Mike said...

My original comment still stands.