YES WE CAN

I have never been more inspired in my whole adult life!!

Please listen carefully.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/01/26/barack-obamas-south-caro_n_83417.html

Now that the arm is getting better...

I have been in physical therapy for 2 months. I am doing so much better since they fired my sadistic therapist who bruised my arms and set me back 1 full month of recovery. Apparently, quite a few folks complained and when I did I guess it was the last straw for them. I felt bad for a minute and then I snapped out of it. What she was doing to me could have caused me so much more damage. Hopefully she is not tormenting others at a new place!

For the first 2 weeks of my recovery, I don't remember a lot. I was living in a Percocet fog.
I have had 4 back surgeries and this was much more difficult and painful.
I do remember the pain and I really remember laughing a helluva lot with my husband.
Hard to imagine laughing so much when you are in so much pain but my husband will do that to me as well as the drugs.

My right arm was in a stabilizing sling for 4 weeks 24/7. Think sling but held at 8 inches away from your body.  Because of this sling, I could not pull my pants up or down completely by myself.  Not what a grown woman wants to have to deal with. 

The first day I had to go to the bathroom I got my sweat pants down a bit on the left side but the right was impossible and I was struggling. Rick asked if I needed help and I thought about my dignity but then thought, "hmm....how much dignity will I have if I pee my pants anyway?"  So of course I said sure! 

He came to the bathroom and thinking he is helping me so much he pulled my sweats and panties down to the floor and I burst out laughing. 

I asked him what the hell he was doing and he responded with, "well you don't want to pee on them do you?"  HUH? 

I explained that women do not drop their drawers to the floor but stop somewhere around the knee area. That cracked him up for some reason.
When I was finished I couldn't get my pants up all the way by myself so there I was with said pants and panties on my thighs. I am holding them up by keeping my legs apart and trying to wash my hands at the same time. I continue to try to pull up my pants but it's not working.  I need my right arm because my left arm is too damn short and I can not reach around damn it.

I had to walk out of the bathroom with pants not even up far enough to cover my butt and ask for help. Dignity completely out the window at this point!  He did pull them up but something wasn't right. I stood in the hall wiggling and adjusting as much as I could with one hand but they just didn't feel right. I went into the kitchen where my wonderful hubby was preparing dinner and he asked me why I was wiggling. Thanks to the Percocet fog I couldn't stop laughing but when I did I told him that my panties were literally in a twist. That made us laugh some more. Thankfully he came over to straighten them out. After several weeks of this dance, we realized that he is much better at taking off my panties than he is putting them on.  His answer to this problem I was having while in this sling thing was to not wear any underwear anymore.

By week 4 I was so tired of wearing a baseball cap because of being unable to do my hair.
I only have one arm and that makes holding a blow dryer and brush a bit difficult. My hair looked horrific. I do not have wash and wear hair. Thankfully I showered daily with my hubby so he was washing my hair. (yea I milked that one) I have a short layered style that needs to be blown dry with product to have any body at all. I had to go to the dr.'s for a follow up and I begged my husband to help me blow dry my hair. Being the ever wonderful man he is he says he'll try. 

In a matter of a minute or less, he has hit me in the head with the blow dryer a few times. When I asked him to move the heat in the direction of the round brush he blew it into my eye and I swear he burned my retina. Then he got the round brush stuck in my hair.
He let go of the brush and it was still attached to my head and he said, "oh oh"
"You know  Rick it might be safer to just turn off the dryer, get the brush out of my head without tearing out all my hair and leaving me bald.  I'll just wear my baseball cap again to the doctors."
His response? I told you to just wear a cap no one really cares! 
Yes but I do! I was feeling so frumpy I just wanted my hair done and some help with looking presentable in public. It was so frustrating for me.

I really did not want to eat a thing for that first month.
I slept in a chair an hour here an hour there.
But my husband was running around making food like a family of 10 lived here.
There are 2 of us. Only 1 eating anything more than soup. 

He is nuts like this.  
He reminds me of every old Italian aunt, mother, and grandmother I have ever known or had in my life.  When I said to him that I only wanted some soup. He made a vat of delicious homemade soup. He is such a great soup maker. Yes, I said a VAT.
We could have feed the block. He told me much later after I was not in withering pain and that fun swirling percocet fog that he was feeling helpless and he didn't know what to do for me other than make me food and hover over me. Oh and hover he did. My God if I moved in the chair and made any type of noise at all he would fly across the room and say, "Can I do something for you? Are you okay? Do you need anything? Are you hungry?"

Now I know that sounds lovely and wonderful. And I am so grateful for his care and attention.  I love him for it all really I do. But I have to admit it became a bit annoying as hell too.  I knew his heart was in the right place but I would open my eyes and there he was standing over me. It just became another joke for us to laugh at. I called him my nonna (grandma in Italian) We worked out a plan and if he was hovering I was to say something to him. When I would say something about his hovering he would laugh and say, "my God I am aren't I?"   He would say that with such sincere shock in his voice and on his face so that too made me howl. 

The funniest to me was my bra. I wasn't allowed to wear a bra my first 4 weeks.
That is fine when you're home but I had to go to physical therapy and I didn't want to knock an eye out. I could have hurt people. So the therapist told me how to put it on so that I wasn't moving my arm in a way I shouldn't move it. I needed a helluva lot of help with the bra. He was so bad at this as well. This is a man who can remove a bra with a snap of his two fingers and viola it's off.  Putting it on was as difficult for him as blow drying my hair.
After a couple of weeks when he got the hang of it he made it a fondling session.
When I asked that he just please put the bra on me and not fondle my breasts he told me that he was doing it his way and he'd smile. I was trapped. I couldn't move my arm. He was making me angry yet he made me laugh too.  He's frustratingly charming if that makes sense. He kept telling me that as my caregiver he deserved to cop a feel when he put on my bra. Honestly, men are idiots aren't they?

There is still a lot of limitations on me but for the most part, I am back to normal.  I still can't reach the inside the microwave above my stove with my right arm but I'm pretty damn close. And Thank God I can pull up my own pants, blow dry my hair and put on my own bra.....although the last one he stills asks if he can help me with.

I am so glad we have the same sense of humor and laughed through all of this. He has been such a great sport and I know I am going to owe him big time. To be honest I don't think I'd be as good a caregiver as he was to me. I hope I never find out because that would mean I'd have to see him in pain and I know that would be tough to deal with for me.


Here's to Health and Wealth in 2008!

Don't Assume How I am voting because I'm......

I am a feminist. I know that in our society today a feminist is a 4 letter word; however I grew up in a time when it was empowering. I continue to hear from the media that because I am a feminist and a white female I must be voting for Hillary Clinton. I am more than just my gender and my race.

I remember in a high school logic class we had to really learn about the candidates.
Not sound bites, but really read and educate our selves on ALL the candidates.
Teams were chosen for us. (I was on team McGovern.) We had to do our homework on ALL candidates and then debate. To me it was exciting and I was so jealous of the 12th graders who were 18 and who could vote while I was only 17.
I had such pride when I turned 18 to register as an independent. As time went on I became a democrat. Today I am back to being an independent and disillusioned as most of the country is in one form or another.
I am proud to say that I have never missed an election.
Some years I have chosen my leader by the lesser of two evils. It appears I may be doing the same again here real soon.

I have nieces who have had a very difficult life and I have always told them that what has happened to them does not make them who they are, but how they deal with the things that happen to them does make them who they are and will become.
This really can be applied to what is going on today in the election in so many ways.

Which all brings me back full circle to Hillary. When she feels trapped in a corner or someone one "upping" here the way she behaves speaks volumes to me and my God I wish more would pay attention to that.
When Barack was ahead, she cried and pulled out Bill. He was on all the talk shows speaking inaccuracies and despicable things about all their opponents. Not discussing Hillary’s plans or vision except in saying it was experience. Experience in what?
Not one candidate has ever been president before and none of you can say that any of the experience leading up to this is even remotely close to being the President of the free world. (And why isn’t this brought up for Guiliani? He was only a mayor… because Hillary isn’t debating him that is why!)

How is she change? Let’s see we’ve had a White House of Bush, Clinton, Bush, and possibly Clinton? No thank you. I want real change.
We are hated more than ever around the world. This behavior of hers will continue to raise it’s ugly head and do we really need more of the same hatred with her “W” like smirk, her too similar holier than thou “W”attitude? If she behaves in this manner now with her “peers” how will she be when sitting across from a country that doesn’t agree with her?
OMG wake up America!

Don’t listen to the sound bites – read – educate yourself. Do not vote because of gender, race, religion or hair. Vote on their record, their ideas of change, and for God’s sake not because someone’s husband, father, or wife was a good leader. I would not want to be judged by my father or my husband. I am my own person. So they too should stand on their own. It rather reminds me of high school. The “mean girl” is popular and her boyfriend, the high school football star who has graduated comes back to help her put down those that she doesn’t like and continue the “high school game” of bullying in one form or another.

So please don’t tell me because I am a woman I am voting for Hillary. Don’t assume I vote with my anatomy. Please don’t assume I am apathetic because I am fully disgusted with America of late and American’s short attention spans and please don’t assume because I voted for Bill Clinton his wife gets a free pass. What we really have to be afraid of is what my republican co-worker said to me a couple of days ago. You guys can keep voting for Hillary, we’ll then win for sure. Sadly that reality seems to be becoming too true for me.

Feminism is not a dirty word

I have always considered myself a feminist. I do not think that is a bad word like most men and women do today.
In the 70’s there were so many women to admire and look up to who were forging this fight for me. While I looked at most as having radical views I also realized that without those radical views of the time and their hard push for change I wouldn’t have had the career or most of the opportunities that have defined my life. The best way I can describe my take on this is a friend who tells me she is a vegetarian but she eats fish all the time and bacon once in a while. Okay in the real world that is not the definition of a vegetarian. For me it’s been a bit of the same. I did not want to “burn” my bra per se because God knows I needed it even in the 70’s. However the reason for the burning I understood very well and agreed with in theory. I know it’s the same for my vegetarian friend.

When I was growing up I remember absolutely loving the television show THAT GIRL with Marlo Thomas. I wanted to be her. At that time it was such a radical thing to see on television - A young woman forging ahead with her dreams independent from her parents or a husband. She lived alone as a choice instead of choosing marriage. All the while she loved clothes and being feminine. Having nice clothes and pretty highlights didn’t diminish her brain, her strength, her beliefs, her conviction to her career or her fight for equality that would arise on a daily basis.
These women of the 70’s with their hard work and dedication to the cause gave me a career like any man had a choice to have and while today I believe we deserve the same pay and opportunities of a man yet it sadly is still not equal. It still isn’t equal on so many levels and today’s young women don’t do anything to further the cause but seem to be good at having role models that hurt the cause....but I digress.

Now having said all of that you would think I would be above looking at a woman and how she dresses. But I am not. I am a feminist who likes a good pair of shoes and personal appearance does mean something to me. I do not think that she should be treated differently because of her dress but that her dress should not take away from what she is saying and doing.

In certain situations I believe that how you are dressing speaks volumes not only about you but the level of respect you have for yourself as well as those you are working with and who are around you. Like a young man wearing his pants below his arse to school, church or a funeral. I've seen that. It's disrespectful on so many levels and it causes you to not see the young man but the clothing he wears. I am not saying that as a woman you have to wear makeup and heels all the time. But my God make an effort to look the best you can with what you have to work with so you are heard not just seen. And that brings me to Hillary.

Same pant suit, different color, different day. For heaven’s sake Janet Reno dressed better than Hillary. The men in both parties are changing it up but not our Hillary. Guiliani even got a makeover before hitting the campaign trail and removed his comb over. Edwards, MCain, Obama you’ll see in jeans, nice pants and a shirt, a suit, casual shirt and tie without jacket. They change it up. Hillary needs help in this area and I would gladly offer my help and do it for free. My God she has the resources.

I have read about her pant suit issue in the Washington Post, Huffington Post, even magazines in my doctors office. I have been at cocktail parties where the only thing about Hillary that is mentioned is the way she dresses. People are making jokes about her pant suits instead of talking about her position on the war or health care. They didn't write about Prime Minister Thatcher that way.
While I do not intend to vote for Ms. Clinton I still think we need to hear her voice not her clothes. Am I contributing to it? Maybe, but I want to help her be heard not made fun of.

C’mon Hillary I don’t live that far from Georgetown so when you’re in town let’s go shopping. I’ll buy lunch and we’ll have a great day of discussing the issues while buying a nice skirt and a great pair of comfortable campaign boots or shoes. I know you have it in you!!

I hate people....

It’s no wonder that everyone fusses over my husbands company's great customer service...Honestly, EVERYBODY SUCKS!
That will be my new 2008 Mantra – Everybody Sucks.

We have not had heat since yesterday. Last night they were here until 10:30p trying to fix the HVAC. Shawn, our service technician said he did not have the last part necessary. He said he’d call by 10am this morning and gave us his cell phone number to call him in case we didn't hear from him. No surprise - No call. I called the office and the young woman said they were looking for this part. (where the hell are you looking?)and she would call me back in 3 minutes to let me know what was going on.
1½ hours later I call the office again. I am freezing. It is 48 degrees in here and 11 degrees outside. They tell me they may have to order it – oh sure let’s wait another week for a part and they will find this husband and wife frozen together like a popsicle.

I tell him that is unacceptable and that if I do not hear from someone by noon today letting me know if you have a part on another truck as you stated I will assume you have not “found” the part and I will have to call another company. We really can not go another day without heat. (let alone what this does for our pipes etc)

Okay so the guy on the phone tells me that, “hey they found one” hmmm.....just like that while you’re talking to me? Yea, he’ll be there between 1 -4pm.
I said okay I will wait until 4p but if I do not hear from someone by 4pm either by phone or in person I have to go elsewhere because I am not paying for another “emergency call” after hours. That got him all pissy with me and he told me that if I couldn’t trust this company then maybe I should go elsewhere. WTF kind of comment is that to make to a customer?
Well let me tell you the nice hat then came off. I went ballistic on his ass. (we even have a service agreement with this company) We’ll see if someone shows up. I have my doubts.

I am so not in a good mood. Too cold to even sleep last night – let alone the fact that I am in so much damn shoulder/arm pain right now.
I HATE PEOPLE...oh wait that was my mantra from 2007.
EVERYBODY SUCKS!!

Time sure flies when you're having fun

Okay so I wasn't really having any fun the last 2 months.
This surgery turned into a lot more than just a torn rotator cuff.

I got a lot of emails and phone calls asking why I wasn't updating my blog. Okay folks why not comment on the blog then? Just curious.....sorry I digress.

Once they got in my shoulder they also found a SLAP Labrum tear. This one is the killer.
I wore a stabilizing sling for 24/7 for 4 weeks. Only time it could come off was to shower. I had to even sleep in it - if you call sitting in a chair sleeping.

I have a sadistic physical therapist and I am not exaggerating. I understand her job is to get me well and to have full range of motion and not get frozen shoulder. But she likes to hurt me for no apparent reason. Week 5 of PT I actually woke up with movement and hardly any pain. It was like a light went off and I was thrilled. My home exercises no longer hurt. While I was only at 50% range of motion it was better than 5 weeks prior so I saw light at the end of the tunnel - finally.
There is one particular exercise she does to me when I am flat on my back on the table and it makes tears come to my eyes instantly. It's the labrum here we're working on and she tells me this particular movement will be the last thing I recover. She pushes my arm back and I am to tell her when it hurts and she then is to go a little bit more. But she doesn't go "a little bit more" She goes so much more I am moving all over the table and instantly cry, it's like I can't control the tears they just fall. I ask her to stop and she says no. I have to do everything in my power not to hit this woman or swear at her. You have no idea. But while I believe she is doing this to me on purpose and I don't think it's protocol I go along like a sheep and think she must be right she's the doctor of physical therapy.
(which she brags about all the time - BFD)

Then the Friday before Xmas she was off.....I had another therapist. It was heaven. This woman did the same exercises but I did not leave there in need of a percocet drip for the next 24 hrs. She did that same exercise I mention above and when it hurt she went a tad bit more and held it for 30 seconds and then let it go. NO BIG PAIN - NO CRYING - NO TORTURE. I asked her about it and she tells me you shouldn't go to that type of pain because it will not be beneficial for you. HALLELUJAH!!!!!!

The following week after Xmas I had my sadistic therapist again and I asked if we could talk about this pain she inflicts on me. She rolled her eyes and said to suck it up if I don't want frozen shoulder. She did an evaluation that day for the Dr.'s report and we didn't do any exercises that day. But at the end of the evaluation she did dig her 10 fingers into my arm/shoulder so hard and when I yelped "what are you doing?" She tells me she was checking to see if this was XYZ or ABC. I said where the hell did that come from? She just rolls her eyes again at me and walks away. Session over.

By that afternoon i was in so much pain i could no longer do all the things I had progressed to doing....like typing....holding a cup of coffee....moving. Now normally I would exercise at home on the days of no therapy. I was in so much pain it was like the 1st week. I was eating percocets like Pez and not getting much relief. 5 days of mind numbing pain. When i went back to PT yesterday I asked the PT aides about this. The one whom I have bonded with tried every so delicately without incriminating herself that this therapist has had this issue arise before and if I would like to change I should ask the lead therapist...her boss.

Do you know how difficult that will be? Man, I hate those situations. The place is small it's not like I won't see her again. I am seeing my Dr. on Wednesday so I am going to start with him. Then I will go to her boss if necessary. I am hoping he will change the therapist for me since his practice owns the therapy center as well. All I know is that I am having an enormous set back and now my left arm is in pain. She tells me its tendinitis from over use to make up for my right arm being inactive. I don't know what to believe anymore.

So moral of this story.....do not fall off an empty 5 gallon bucket.....for that matter don't do any physical labor. Hire big strong men to do your work while you drink a glass of wine and watch them!! Less painful and it's nice on the eyes.

I'll fill you in on my great caregiver later.....he was great!
Happy New Year.

Pre-Surgery

Tomorrow is the big day. Torn rotator cuff repaired. Arm in a sling for 24/7 for 4 weeks. I will not be able to type or much else for that matter.
I have had surgeries before but for some reason this one is scaring me. Oh well.....soldier on.

We closed up the lake house this weekend. It is always a bit sad to do. All the colorful adirondack chairs piled and stored away along with the umbrella's and floating lounge chairs. All the summer fun with those items, all piled away for the winter.
On a happy note - the leaves were gorgeous reds, oranges and yellows. It smells so delicious. I love the smell of fall.

We are surrounded by trees on this 1 acre of land on the water and while it is beautiful it also means a ton of work. We spent 2 days blowing those leaves off the wrap around deck and driveway and yard. It's never ending. I am sure if we could go down this thanksgiving we'd find another pile on the deck that was calf deep. This will be our first thanksgiving not at the lake in years. It will be weird. But I know I will be unable to make that drive next week.

I've been running around busy as hell before the surgery tomorrow. Preparing food so hubby has something to come home and just nuke for dinner. Laundry, bills paid, food in fridge and cupboards, all errands run, make sure all his work clothes are there for a few weeks from cleaners and laundry. All of this before I can leave for surgery. Got me to thinking about when I traveled all the time for work. Same thing. When my husband traveled for work he packed and left. I went through a week of prep for being gone. Same thing here. I got to thinking what would my husband be doing if his surgery was tomorrow morning. NOTHING. He would get up and go to the hospital. End of story. I've been preparing everyone and everything for a week. Jeez, this may end up being a vacation for me after all.
:-)

See ya all soon.

Weekend

Just came back from the grocery store to load up my house with food I can't eat for company that is coming. Hubby and I are a couple without kids so we don't normally have "kid" food. Hell when I was growing up my parents didn't give us "kid" food we ate what the adults ate or we didn't eat. But I digress.....

I got a couple bottles of wine in hopes that the adults could have a nice evening of drinks and conversation but I know that would never happen when I suddently saw the aisle with baby benadryl and I got to thinking....
I could put this in the kids beverages so the adults could actually finish a complete thought without interruption or have a full conversation this weekend ....hmm....is that wrong?

Left Over Halloween Candy

Okay it's been awhile since I've written I know.
I was emailed yesterday to ask if I was okay.
I am.

I have to admit that I am not on top of my game right now. I am in a lot of pain with this damn torn rotator cuff and it's not getting any better. I can't sleep and my ass is dragging 24/7.
So between being exhausted beyond belief and in a great deal of pain it's been a real ball of fun.

My surgery is the 13th and I am actually looking forward to it because I think I'll at least be out of pain....or so I hope I will be afterwards.

I have family coming this weekend so I have a lot to do to prepare. The stress of it all.
The food, the activities to keep the kids amused so every now and then we adults can get a conversation in. You know the drill- clean, cook, amuse.....stress.

We only had a small amount of trick-or-treaters last night. Very very odd for us.
At first we thought because of ole W's smart idea to move daylight savings time up a few weeks and it was now light outside no one was ringing our doorbell. But it never really picked up later either. We live in a development of nothing but little ones running around so this was so weird.
Where did they all go?

We have so much candy left over it isn't even funny. Thankfully I only buy what I don't like so there is no chance in hell I would eat any of it. Know anyone who loves full size Kit-Kats or Reese's Peanut butter cups send 'em over - my husbands waist line depends on it.

Monday Morning Blues

I've got the Monday Morning Blues.

• The Sox won the World Series. Not only is that hard for me to say out loud but to even type it, I get nausous. Yes that is enough to make one jump off a ledge. Oh God.
• We got our first frost last night and when my feet hit the floor this morning I actually let out a tiny yelp. Had to turn on our heat this morning as I wrapped my cold hands around my warm coffee cup. It's only October what the hell is happening? It's suppose to be in the high 60's right now.
• A-Rod is leaving the Yankees and something tells me this is the beginning of the end of many great players leaving. I am heartbroken and have a terrible feeling I am going to feel like this for awhile this off season.

I think I'm going back to bed....may be all of this is just a horrible dream.

Fires

I am glued to the TV watching these fires. I imagine like most folks are.
I can not fathom the fear this would invoke. All of it is just too much.

What I found so interesting last night is that it appears to have happened to white upper middle class and above. When they showed all the people at the stadium in San Diego the newcasters wanted to point out over and over again how it was a "fun" place to be. They had everything they needed. Then he showed a woman who said that they had so much food and water that they didn't know what to do with it all. (then give to those that don't have everything like the City Mission - duh! bragging about your riches really bugs me)

None of this sat well with me. I turned to my husband and asked, "is it me or are they putting a spin on this that is not the reality or to prove that a lesson was learned from Katrina and they are indeed in need of nothing?"

I so want to believe that "we" learned our lesson. However I don't believe that to be the case. Am I being cynical? Perhaps. But perhaps the fact is that they are not showing a full picture. Perhaps if this happened in South LA there would be no more food and fun at the stadium. Perhaps if it had happened in Compton no one would come put out the fires. Perhaps if in a poor community of LA instead of Malibu or San Diego or Orange County the warnings of evacuating wouldn't have been so quick and swift.

I know, I know, there are still hardships and having no fire trucks anywhere near you when you see the fire in your back yard has to be so damn frightening to say the least. My friend who lives in O.C. said that they can see the fire about 1/2 mile away and there were no fireman, fire trucks, no planes overhead. How scary is that? No help and not even from the National Guard who normally are on our land to protect us - but where are they? .....in Iraq for GW doing his dirty deeds.

I hope that I am indeed just cyncial and we all learned our lessons from Katrina. But with this administration it is hard to believe that they can get anything right other than patting each other on the back, deflecting, lying, and controling the media.

Friday Ramblings

The weather here is nuts. Hot, humid and a whole two minutes of rain. Doesn't much help the drought I'd say. I wish we could get 2-3 days of a nice steady cool rain. Is that so much to ask for in October - cool weather? Like 65 degrees would be swell. Seriously I did say swell didn't I? Well it would be swell to wear a sweatshirt in October, not shorts and a T-shirt and have my air conditioning on. Damn Global warming......oh wait the administration thinks that's all phooey....and we know how smart this administration is so they must be right. Yea, Halloween wearing shorts is what we all remember here in the east.

Joe Torre today was a class act in his press conference. Telling us all why he walked away from the 1 yr offer. But what else can he be but a class act? I love that man. I love that he never utters a negative word about those that didn't treat him well....and he could. He was treated like shit and I love that he rose above it all with dignity and class and told the Steinbrenner's and Levine to shove it up their ass...so to speak.. by not taking the contract. Go Joe. He would have been a fool to take what they were offering because it would have meant they had no faith in him. How could a man or a person with any pride do that? I believe they did it knowing full well that it was a slap in the face and that he would refuse it. Cowards! They would rather have the fans think Joe walked away vs. them being the bad guy. But we fans aren't stupid. If he had taken it I would have been thrilled for myself of his return but my God it would have disappointment me that he would have thought so little of himself. I will miss him and God knows the Steinbrenner's will to....you wait and see.
He reminds me so much of my Uncle Angelo and my hubby. A quiet steel reserve of a strong man who is a big marshmellow. Who is not afraid to cry in public and say wonderful things about his family and friends. They don't make 'em like that anymore. He deserves to toot his own horn but he doesn't. It's always a we mentality and it's always from his heart. He is straight up no chaser without having to be hurtful or mean. Doesn't get any better than that. If I had a son that is what I would want him to be like. But then I am married to a man just like that so I guess that explains Mr. Torre's appeal to me. Where are those type of men these days? I don't know any other than my hubby and Mr. Torre. They are a dying breed indeed. (my Uncle has since passed too)

TGIF

Right brain vs. left brain

I sent this link to my friends and all say it goes either clockwise or counter clockwise.
http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,21985,22556281-661,00.html
I found it did both. Hubby says I’m nuts and need a padded room...to him it only goes clockwise. Then I find that 2 of my friends think the same thing as me and they see it go both ways. So are we 3 nuts or are we the ones who are completely enlightened? Hmmm......

Hubby wants to learn Spanish/Mexican whatever.
Every time that damn Rosetta commercial comes on he talks about us either taking a class or ordering these tapes. Everyone including the cleaning woman speaks spanish and we should learn he says.
I just feel it would be easier if they learned English.
I am old and don’t think I can do it.

Besides I do know another language other than American English and that’s Italian.
None of which I can say around those that know Italian but it serves me well in frustrated situations or when I want to refer to someone in front of them and not have them know what it is I am saying about them.

When I was growing up I heard my mother speak Italian all the time. Sometimes when I asked what she was saying she would tell me. But I didn’t find out until I was years older that most of the time she was lying to me. She was either swearing or calling someone something that wasn’t appropriate. My sister and I have come to find out she was even swearing at us at times. Who knew? For some reason I find that funny now as an adult. As kids we used pig latin, in my household my parents used Italian to talk so the kids didn't know what was being said. I bet your parents spelled huh?

My mom always told my sister and me to never say, “shut up” to one another or anyone it wasn’t polite.
“We don’t say shut up to one another, we say please be quite.” My mom said a phrase to my sister and I often when we were arguing over whose turn it was to do the dishes, or her stuff being on my side of the room. My mom would get us quiet by saying something that I couldn’t spell for the life of me here. But we knew it meant to be quiet and stop what we were doing INSTANTLY.

My mom died when I was 13. I found out at age 22 that the word she always used was shut up in Italian. For some reason that still makes me laugh.

Oh how I learned the hard way. I learned that the word she used in frustration was actually fuck you or a variation of and once while playing old maid’s with my cousins I said it. I swear to you my mother’s feet didn’t touch the floor as she flew into the room to slap me and put soap in my mouth for using that word. I didn’t even know what it meant. But I was frustrated, I was the Old Maid 2 times in a row and she said it when she was frustrated...and I was now frustrated.

I was watching Rachel Ray the other day and she kept calling her dish cloth a word in Italian that I had heard for many years by various people in my family.
I smiled because I knew that word. It was actually slang. My mom said it all the time. But did the audience watching know what she was actually talking about? I felt a sense of accomplishment like I had actually done something worthy of such pride.

Right then I realized I did indeed know another language.
So tell my husband to back off I don’t need anymore classes or tapes.
My brain is full.
There are only so many swear words even I can use.

A Nyquil Float

Okay it's been awhile and here are a few things that have been keeping me busy.

Husband is doing better.....lung infection has been kicking his ass but he is improving and I couldn't be more thankful about that!
My parents have become my kids and it is so damn stressful.
The weather is wreaking havoc on my allergies and I am feeling miserable!

I actually went to bed last night at 8:15pm and I'm tired right now. Go figure.
I don't think I've done that without being drunk or 6 yrs old. And since I was not either you know I was feeling rough. I woke up a bunch of times through out the night to cough or try to be comfortable on this damn torn rotator cuff but always managed to get back to sleep for a little bit.

Tonight may require Nyquil so that I won't wake up and cough. You know if I could I'd put a big scoop of ice cream in my Nyquil and I could feed 2 addictions at once. See, I'm always thinking....no matter what they say.

Ramblings

Hey I found something that is good about being 50. I turned on my tivo’d to watch Ellen last evening while making dinner. Rita Wilson was a guest and she said how she loves the freedom of really saying what she feels now at 50. It feels like she has been given the right to do so. The story she told was hilarious and I could so relate. I also realized she was spot on, it is freeing and something changed for me at 50 as well in that regard.

So there ya go.....A great thing about being 50.... The freedom to speak your mind because you feel you have earned it. Amen sister!

When I find more positives I’ll let you know. In case any one is counting that is like 150 to 1. Okay 150 to 2. Being alive certainly counts as 1 even if limping, sagging, wrinkling and being in pain right?

I am buried with work today and it’s sunny outside my window......I’m distracted.

My Dr. McDreamy

Okay it’s official I will be unable to pitch for the Yankees. And God knows they need pitching!

After months of aggressive physical therapy otherwise known as pure torture that is considered legal – Hey GW gets away with it.....I am surrendering and having the surgery.

I can not sleep for more than an hour. I can’t find a place of no pain. It really does suck.

I was told I have to wear a sling for the first 4 weeks after surgery and not drive. I asked my oooh so cute young doctor when he told me I couldn’t drive during my sling wearing days that I thought that was rather obvious. He laughed and said, “Yes you would think so wouldn’t you?” So I guess it isn’t common sense to most to assume you can’t drive while wearing a sling. But as we all know if sense were common more people would have it.

So I got to thinking about the surgery on my right shoulder. Oh not the pain part, or the rehab after it, or the actual arthroscopic surgery part but the really, really important things like...... Who is going to blow dry my hair? I don’t have the kind of hair that is wash and wear. Will I have to wear a baseball cap for 4 weeks for heaven’s sake? I can’t go out in public like that. Who will put on my make up? Oh my, if my husband tries to assist with makeup I will end up looking like a tranny or Tammy Faye. Who will drive me to the nail salon? I can not use my left hand for anything more than typing so this will be a very ugly 4 weeks I see coming my way.

Oh but on an up note – there will be pharmaceuticals. :-)
And I also get to see my doctor a few more times.
Hubby thinks I hurt myself on purpose because I told him that the young orthopedic surgeon I am seeing is a hunk-a-hunk-a burning love. Oh ladies (and some boys) this man is so good looking. He is tall, muscular, tan, fit and blonde. Hummina hummina hummina is really all I can say about that.

So if you are going to be in pain and need a physician he is McDreamy. My very own Dr. McDreamy.

Now if only my physical therapist wasn’t a mean old woman!!!

Much better day.....sort of

What an amazing day!
I got to see a friend from Seattle that I haven’t seen in a few years whom I adore. I finally got to meet her partner which was long overdue and she too is wonderful and a perfect fit for my friend Jamie! Ah, ain’t love grand? I love it when you see it and it’s working. Love ‘em.

While we’re on good news, the company who sent my husband and I that awful tech to repair our refrigerator called today to apologize to us and tell us that when they return with the new parts next Thursday they will be sure not to send Mr. Cranky Pants. Halleluiah!

On a sad note I am wearing a black arm band today to show my mourning for my Yankees getting their asses handed to them on a plate last night. My Yankees lost last evening to a great Cleveland Indian Team who were tenacious and who so out pitched us it was sad. What the hell has happened to Wang? Was it pressure of the playoffs? (Well he is only 1 person there were a lot more issues than just him in pitching that is for sure.)
I’m also wearing it because my team will be dismantled from what I read and I can’t handle it. Why must Joe go? He wasn’t pitching for God’s sake? God how I dislike like Steinbrenner! And A-Rod, now that he is finally saying things like “we”, and “the team” instead of me, me, me and I, I, I, all the time he is going to leave us? And Marino, Jorge, oh no the thought of no Jorge is enough to send me to the doctor for antidepressants. (hip hip Jorge! love him!)
Let’s hope my boys can come out of this unscathed as possible with ole George at the reigns.

Now if only Cleveland can kick some Boston Ass big time so I can root for Cleveland in the World Series my month would be complete!

Mr. Cranky Pants

Oh it just kept coming at us on Friday.
It's not like my Friday didn't start off badly with the doctor's offices and my fear of my husbands health but then I had to deal with Mr. Cranky Pants.

I came home on Wednesday night with several bags of groceries only to open the freezer and find things melting. By the time Rick came home he discovered that the fridge was now only keeping things Cool vs. Cold. Rick was convinced it was the compressor. But since I don't know a compressor from a evaporator I decided to just look for my warrenty, receipt, and manual and see what we should do next. (My refrigerator is just under 5 yrs old.)

I called Amana to see about our warranty and service. I took copious notes and asked the young woman’s name. I repeated everything back to her that she told me. She agreed with everything I said and told me that the information was correct. Now the important part of all this is that she told me it would fall under warranty if it was a compressor, evaporator, dryer, door liner, etc. was the issue. She (Kathleen) stated that they would probably ask for $65.00 for a diagnosis fee or some fees and that if the technician did then I should call her back while he is there so she could talk to him because I should not have to pay for any fees because this is under warranty.

She made us an appointment and was nice enough to aplogize for the fact that they just couldn't have anyone out to our home until Friday. I said I'd take it....and she said I had to sit at home from 8a – 5p to await the refrigerator repair man. Okay so you do what you have to do but pray to God he shows up sooner so you can get back to work and your life.

At 5:30pm we called Amana and asked if indeed someone was coming or was it to late and would we have to reschedule? They said he had several appointments before us but that he would definitely be there. Okay that was great to hear. My Gin that is kept in the freezer would be cold again for the weekend. YIPEE!

At 5:45pm we got a call that he was running late and we were indeed his next appointment after the one he was currently just begining to work on. Rick thanked him for calling to let us know and we would be here waiting for him. We actually think now that they probably called the tech a.k.a. Mr. Cranky Pants to see where he was and asked him to call us. Either way we were happy with that service!

At 6:45pm Mr. Cranky Pants rang our doorbell. I was just rounding the staircase and as I stood at the bottom step my husband opened the door. Rick being the ever cheerful warm guy that he is smiled & said, “Hello, welcome....” And as he was talking Mr. Cranky Pants pushed by his arm and walked through the foyer down the hall to the kitchen without more than a grunt. My mouth was agape and my husband and I looked at each other like what the hell just happened here? We walked into the kitchen and I said hello to which he said nothing and kept his back towards me. He just opened the refridgerator and never even looked at me once.

At this point Rick and I are both standing at the kitchen island looking back and forth at each other then at him at the fridge. I think we were both speechless at his behavior at this point and Rick rolled his eyes at me and that made me laugh. Then Mr. Cranky Pants looks at Rick and says, “What exactly is wrong with the refridgerator?” I thought that was odd but Rick knows so no problem. Of course Mr. Cranky pants says,"well we'll see." And not in a nice way but a swarmy rude curt way.

Mr. Cranky pants opens his laptop on the island and finally makes eye contact with me and says this is going to cost you did anyone tell you that? Now that sentence or question sounds harmless enough but I have to tell you he was saying it in such a rude nasty way that took both Rick and I off guard. I shared with him that I spoke to someone named Kathleen from his company. She told me that if you should ask for money or a check that I was to call your company because that was not the case here because this was under warranty and they could discuss it with you.

OMG that about sent Mr. Cranky Pants into orbit. His face got red and he was now screaming at us. I don't even mean talking louding I mean SCREAMING.....About what I don’t even recall at all – he was now a full blown lunatic!
We asked him to calm down but he was on a roll and he was bitching about the long day he’s had and the traffic and it’s 7pm now and he’s still working.
Okay that last one did it for me.

I said, “Okay Mr. Cranky Pants (insert his real name here) I have had to be home all day to wait for you first of all. You are late. You come into my home with an attitude from the get go. You were rude and when you were greeted at the door by my husband you pushed him aside and walked into our home like it was yours and he was an intruder. You never uttered a word to us even after spoken to. When we spoke to you, you either chose to ignore us or grunt and never once did you look at either one of us in the eye. I am sorry you had a bad day but by God that is not my problem. I have bad days all day long and this one isn’t getting any better but I didn’t take it out on you when you walked into my home did I? Now if you would just allow me to call your company we will work this out I am sure.”

He then went off on a tirade about the traffic and having to work this long of a day. And if I thought he was so rude he would leave right now and I could get someone else. He said this twice and I knew that is what he wanted to be off the hook.....not on my watch mister.

The wrath of Margaret was now here....Now the gloves were off with me and I say to him, “I’m sorry your day is long but that is YOUR JOB. Your customer only wants good service and your problems with your job you should bring up with your boss and not take out on your customers it is not their fault. I have been without a fridge for a day and half and am not happy but I am not taking it out on you. As for you leaving right now because we find you to be rude and cantankerous, well you are NOT getting off that easy. That would make you happy but You are here and YOU are dealing with this NOW. We have been waiting for 1 ½ days for you to show up. I am going to call your company now and I am sure we will get the money issue straightened out but you are NOT leaving and being let off the hook.” At which point my husband stood up and is nodding and smiling at me. Hubby is a big boy – Numb nuts is a small fry – hubby is a big teddy bear but if you don’t know him he can look intimating and it worked.

We called the company and got all of the money issues straightened out and then Mr. Cranky Pants got real nice after he got off the phone with them. Hmm...imagine that.

When Mr. Cranky Pants wanted to discuss or ask us something about the issue of the fridge he would only speak to my husband because he was “the man.” Even if I was there and Rick wasn't in the room he would call out for Rick. And each time my husband would tell him to tell or ask me – he did this on purpose because he could tell that this southern redneck felt that women should be seen and not heard.
See why I love this man?........my hubby is the best feminist I know.

Cranky Pants will be back this Wednesday and if he is nice he’ll see that we usually offer things like food and beverage to service people who come to our home to do work. When you act like Mr. Cranky Pants you only get the wrath of Margaret. You've been warned.

Bitch Slapping People

I am so damn angry right now I could spit fire! OMG it is such a good thing I don’t believe in guns because there would be a bloody corpse at the doctors office right now....and her name is Lindsay.

Some of the back story. A few years ago my husband had what is called a “virtual physical”
As my husband and I gathered around the computer the radiologist put his image on this big TV size computer screen and she began to go over his body starting at the top. As she got to his lungs she says oh so matter of factly, “these are nodules all over your lungs it appears you have stage 4 lung cancer you may want to get your affairs in order” and without missing a beat she goes onto the next body part. At this point I was like a Charlie Brown show only hearing, “Wah wah wah wah wah” My husband has the where with all to say, “Whoa back up a minute what did you say?” Again this “professional” says you have stage 4 lung cancer and continues to move down his body on the computer screen without missing a damn beat.

We never heard another word. We walked out of there in stunned silence. My world immediately began to collapse. My husband asked me to drive us home. It was a silent trip at first and then I got into cheerleader mode. I said, “Look you are not a smoker. You have asthma but you are young and healthy and maybe she just read this wrong.” He gave me a look like he appreciated my attempt but stop it. I said, “Before we take this all in we are going to call another doctor and Johns Hopkins. And that is what we did.

The 1st pulmonary doctor did a CT Scan and said that the “spots” on his lungs were not cancerous and began to ask my husband a series questions. Come to find out he had something called silo fillers disease. Apparently when he was young his first “attack” was after playing with his cousin in a corn silo. I guess this left some residue scaring or something like that. (Too much medical jargon for me to explain but google it you’ll see) Bottom line he did not have cancer but to put us at ease she recommended that he have another CT scan later in the year to see if they changed at all to be sure. She knew we were getting a 3rd opinion and said that she understood our need to do that and wished us the best and to call if she could do anything for us.

We then trekked to Johns Hopkins in Baltimore with our CT Scan in hand as well as our legal notepad of questions. We saw a team of Pulmonary specialist that was right out of a movie. Man they were thorough, thoughtful and explained it all so we could understand. They were patient as we asked all our questions. The team told us that they see a lot erroneous diagnosis with the “Virtual Physicals.” They too suggested we have another CT Scan down the road to be absolutely sure but like the 2nd doctor said we had to wait because too many CT Scans are not good for your lungs either. But they all touched my husbands shoulder and said they were very very confident that he was fine aside from his issue of asthma. Whew. That was 5 years ago and he is just fine.

He continued to see the local doctor here every year. Last June was his last visit with Dr. Marla and she told him that he didn't really need to see her every year unless there was an issue. Those were wonderful words to him so he hasn’t needed her until now.

Fast forward to this week. It began with him needing his inhaler. After his prescription inhaler was out he bought an over the counter one. I asked if he thought we should make an appointment with the dr but he said this is probably just the ragweed and the season and no big deal. Well it has now become a big deal. He is sick, he says his lungs fill “full” as of last night he began the coughing & hacking. I mentioned that he has an open day on Friday because we were to go out of town – how about we get you into your pulmonary doctor first? He agrees......so I know he is feeling very badly if he agrees so easily to see Dr. Marla.

So this morning the first thing I do is call the doctor’s office. The little young unprofessional chirpy that answered the office phone is who I would like to bitch slap into next year. I picture her as not educated, nail polish chipping off her chewed down nails, snapping gum and with big hair. Think Brittany Spears without the money......still trashy but can’t go shopping outside of Wal-Mart kind of thing.
Okay this twit says to me that my husband can’t get in the office to see the doctor tomorrow because he hasn’t been seen in a year. I said well that is because he has had no reason to come in to see Dr. Marla. The Chirpy cops an attitude and goes on a tirade about how the office policy is that if you are not seen in a year then it will be more than a 15 minute appointment. HUH??? WTF does that have to do with anything? So I politely ask, “What does that mean exactly?” She actually HUFFED – NO SHIT she HUFFED at me.
Then she says LOUDER as though I was deaf vs. unable to understand this policy, “it means it’s office policy and you will need more than 15 minutes and we don’t have any such appointments for you. I then repeated to Miss Chirpy that Dr. Marla had told Rick on his last appointment that he didn’t need to see her every year unless there was an emergency. This is an emergency.” She said, “oh well. That is our office policy.” (I want to hit her so badly) I said, “your name was Lindsay right?” Lindsay says, “Yea” (oh again that professional grammar taking place) I say as calmly and nicely as anyone could muster, “Lindsay, I would like to suggest that you mention this policy to Dr. Marla so that she doesn’t continue to tell her patients not to come in if this is something that you insist on as an office policy. Can Rick then see another doctor in the practice. He is having trouble breathing, sleeping and he is very sick” To which Lindsay retorts, “No. I already told you that we can not see him and none of the other doctors in the practice can see another doctors patients. And I don't have to tell the Dr. anything!”

I was livid. So he could be bleeding in front of them from all of his orfaces but “oops we can’t see you because it’s been 15 months since you’ve been here and the other doctors are not allowed to help you.” WTF kind of professionalism is this?

I then called Rick’s internal medicine/family doctor who is golfing today and tomorrow and is not taking appointments, but he can get him in on the 15th. Gee thanks.

I suggested Urgent Care to Rick to which he snorted and replied, “you’ve got to be kidding me right? We went there in July when I fell down the stairs and broke my foot and tore tendons in my foot and they read my x-rays and said I was fine just a bruise.” If they can’t read a fucking x-ray do you honestly think I want them to look at my lungs for heavens sake?” Good point.

So in the meantime our choices are to:
1. Suffer.
2. Go to the ER and wait for 6 -10 hours amongst all the illegal immigrants who use the ER as a doctors office and real emergency have to wait.
3. Suffer until you are taken in an ambulance.
4. I don’t even want to go there.

And to that bitch Lindsay, I say this to you in all seriousness - Get a job where you don’t speak to the public. You do not have social skills young lady.

I will be writing a letter to the doctor because damn it I am so fucking sick of people and the way they treat others. It will do nothing I suppose but make me feel better. I have to calm down first so that I can take out the emotion in my letter and insert just the facts. But by God this doctor is getting a letter. It reminds me of an episode of Designing Women when Julia took everyone’s name during a trip to write letters to all the airline employees, hotel clerks etc along the way who were never helpful and were rude. It was funny then, but not while it’s happening to you believe me!

Customer service people – customer service....ever hear of it? A Faint memory to us all in our current society. For God's sake they could at least fake it in front of me. Hell I do it all day long.
Even when I know my customers are wrong or a fucking pain in my ass or both I still agree with them, have empathy, we work on problem resolution until the customer is happy and they think I’m great. I then hang up the phone and I scream and I rant and then I write it in a blog but the customer never knows how I really feel they feel they have gotten good service and I made it right for them – do you hear me you little asshole Lindsay?

Tom Selleck

A little back story here......
Since being downsized I now work for my husband as his office manager answering his company phones, dealing with customers, scheduling appointments, etc. I use my maiden name and never say I am his wife. Makes life easier that way for a number of reasons that I will elaborate on another time.
And yes back in the day of Magnum P.I. I too saw the resemblance but now.........not so much.


A customer called about 3 weeks ago and she had 2 bathrooms that needed done.
She asked about prices for the bathroom walls that were tiled, the tub and the tile walls surrounding the tub in both bathrooms but different sizes.
I suggested that she have an in home estimate first due to the varying size and height of the tiles in both bathrooms etc.

So Rick goes out to her home and when he left she called me immediately and said......."OMG he was early and I didn’t even get my makeup on and he is soooo cute. You didn’t tell me your boss was so cute. He looks like Tom Selleck. My husband even thought he looked like Tom Selleck. Ooooh he is so cute... and he was so friendly and warm”......yada yada yada."


Okay here is where I burst out laughing.
I was laughing so much that she asked me, “Well don’t you think he is gorgeous?”
I went along and said, “Um, gorgeous? Well he’s my boss I don’t think of him like that.”
She said when he comes back to do the job she was going to be sure to be dressed better and have on my makeup so he doesn’t see her like this again.  Then she asked, "How soon can we schedule this job?”

OMG this woman cracked me up so when Rick got home I asked him about her...of course without telling him about this conversation at first.
He said that she was in her mid to late 60’s and frumpy,why?
That cracked me up to find out her age because I knew that would bother him so I told him what she said.
He too laughed his ass off at this one.

Here's the thing I find about men. No matter their age they always look and drool over yound women. They may not doing overtly but they do it. They still think they can get that young lady even though the young lady doesn't notice this old man. That is where I find it funny.


So this particular morning as he was leaving to go take care of her bathrooms I reminded “Tom” that he better not be early so she can have time to put on her face.
He is not dressed on this day in his estimate nice clothes but in his white painter paints and his logo T-shirt with his logo baseball cap. I don’t think she will see the Tom Selleck resemblance today.

We had a good laugh – I told Rick that if she begs for IT baby make sure she at least pays very well for it!
He wants to know why this doesn’t happen with 30 year olds? (see what I mean?)
I don’t much care why- just happy and thankful it doesn't mister!


One of his recent young customers was playing what he calls really good music as he reglazed her bathtub and Rick said to her, “This music is great thanks.”
She smiled at him and said, “I thought you’d like it my dad made me this mixed CD of rock ‘n roll from back in his day”   That made his ego deflate very quickly. He laughs but as most men it bugs him.  I get it women of a certain age become invisible.

Back in the day, 20+ years ago, when he was  helping our delivery people at the Cookie Mug he had a woman come to the door without a shirt on.  That made him happy. He couldn't wait to tell me and some of the other male drivers. Today as a tub and tile reglazer he has witnessed a man who thought nothing of just bending over naked to put on his tiddy whities in front of him and now this from a 60 something woman.

He says to me that his life has taken a very very bad ugly turn. .....and being the bad wife I am I giggle through all of this.

Babies Laughing

Ever watch Bravo's Inside the Actor's Studio? At the end where James Lipton asks them questions like what is your favorite sound? swear word? etc.

This is my favorite sound. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oz-q17TV9fA
I know you didn't ask me but this would be my answer to Mr. Lipton when he asked.
I defy anyone to watch this and not at the very least smile. That laugh is sheer joy! How often do we have that in our lives?

Next time you feel like shit or someone makes you so mad you could scream - watch this kid. At the very least it will lighten the mood but I bet it will make you smile or laugh yourself.

Now if only I could rent a kid when they are like this and then give 'em back......

STUPID OR JUST BLONDE MOMENTS?

I am blocked......I'm stealing from myself as I have done in the past on things I wrote before there were followers. I haven't done that in awhile and Raquel gave me the idea. thanks Roc.
This below is from 2007...
_________________________________________________________

I read a few blogs and I have to say I really enjoy a lot of funny men and women bloggers. There are several that never fail to make me laugh.

One such blog taught me a new word.  That is always fun even if you aren't playing scrabble. But here is what I want to know. How in the hell could I have never known this word? I am the mere definition of this word. How could I not have seen it or read it in all of my years when it defines me. Was my picture not in Webster’s next to this definition?
How could I have done so well on the ole verbal part of the SAT's if I didn't know this word?

I read her profile and I said to myself she must be my long lost younger sister. My parents had a child that got away....or perhaps I’m adopted. Who knows but could there really be two identical people out there that are open minded, kind, do-gooders by nature that yet have such a disdain for most people? Two adult females who feel the way they do about people and yet work in a people person and customer service oriented industry? Hmmm.....


My new word is misanthropic. An entry I found for this word was as follows.
Function: adjective
1: of, relating to, or characteristic of a misanthrope. (really does Webster think this helps if you don’t know what the hell the word means. Honestly)
2: marked by a hatred or contempt for humankind. (Bingo- see previous blogs below)
Synonym see CYNCIAL


I said to a good friend over labor day how I hate people. She laughed and said, "Oh you do not you are always smiling and laughing." Okay true for the most part but does that mean I have to like everyone because I am generally happy? Can’t I be a curmudgeon with a smile? Another friend said that she knew I felt that way but it was the exact opposite of how I live my life so it wasn’t making sense to her. Oh c'mon let me have this one thing, why the hell can’t I be both? No one is 100% anything are they?


Okay maybe W is just stupid and only stupid -he may be the exception here.
My husband says it’s really stupid people that I dislike.
I am not so sure that’s the only ones but they are sure as hell right up there. Here are a few of those Mensa’s that I have run into this week – tell me what you think.

• A vegetarian who smokes cigarettes like crazy and then tells me that if I eat that steak how bad it is for my body –Vegan’s who smoke giving me a lecture about health!
• How about the nut jobs who think that I should not be allowed to do what I want with my own body. People who call themselves pro-life but believe in capital punishment? Oh so it’s okay to kill once they are out of the womb but not before they are actually formed into a human.
• How about that dumb grocery store clerk who couldn’t give me change because the cash register was broken.  The drawer is open so she can give me change if she knew how to count it back to me. She just stared at the machine hoping the numbers would pop up there until I finally told her what amount to give me back. I could have told her anything and the bubble head would have given it to me.

Those are a few examples of my week. Sadly there are more of those morons by the minute. Who is to blame for this?  Or are these stupid people breeding more than others? 
We need to get them birth control - stat.

Now none of this can be confused with having blonde moments. Blonde moments are funny. Blonde moments don’t hurt anyone. Blonde moments if only moments are not a bad thing.
If you're blonde and Paris Hilton – then it’s not a moment it’s just Stupid.


I am not embarrassed to tell you that I have a ton of those Blonde moments myself.
Two I will repeat here –


It was October a few years back. I was living at a home at the time with a staircase up to our front door. There was an olive bush at the end of the staircase right by the driveway & garage door.
We had friends that had just arrived from LA. They were getting out of their car and my husband and I walked out the front door to say hello. As they were removing their luggage from the trunk my husband and I were waiting for them at the top of the stairs. I got a heavy whiff of the very fragrant aroma coming from that olive bush. It was such a sweet beautiful smell, almost like perfume. My friends down below had just reached the bottom of the staircase by the olive bush when I said, “Rusty can you smell my bush from there?”
At which time he and his wife began to howl and he replied, “Oh Margaret not now, I am standing here with my lovely wife.” And everyone began to laugh. I didn’t even realize at first what I had said but it still cracks me up.

I was driving down the street in my little convertible that I had at the time.  It was a gorgeous sunny day.  The day before my husband said he was going to clean the car and do the windows for me. I struggle with the windows for some reason and he does such a great job of getting them streak free.
As I am driving down the street I look in my rear view mirror and think to myself, "wow he really must teach me how he gets these windows so streak free" 
I go a bit further and I look in my rear view mirror again because seriously I can't get over what a clear window I now have.  I get to a stop sign and can't stop looking in my rear view mirror at my back windsheild. When suddenly I realize the top is down and there is no friggin' window/windsheild right now.  I laughed out loud and the woman crossing the street with her dog heard me and looked at me like I was crazy.  Hell I was! (am)
Now the fact that I went home and told my husband may make me lose a few IQ points I'm afraid.


See not stupid, just a blonde moment.

The New York Yankees Win

You either love them or you hate them.
I happen to LOVE THEM!!
My Boys of Summer....My hunks in pinstripes.....The New York Yankees.
(add sigh here)

When we play Boston my stomach is doing flip flops. The games are long and I am so exhausted when these games are over that you would think I was playing short stop instead of Jeter for heaven’s sake.

I sit on the edge of my sofa or chair and when it’s intense....and it always is when we are playing those dreaded Red Sox .... I pace and rock and scream at the TV at the lousy ump who said Damon was out when he was clearly safe. You know stuff like that.

I am exhausted today. But we won 2 of the 3 games of that series and we swept them last time. So I am tired but sure as hell happy about the outcome. I honestly feel sometimes that as long as we sweep, kick ass, pummel in scoring and humiliate the red sox all is right in the world. They have become too good a team over the last few years so it’s become harder and harder. But can I tell you how much I dislike Curt Shilling? Didn’t like him when he was a Diamondback either. A diva for sure and a big mouth one at that. Although I must admit he said something a while back in an interview that actually gave me a bit of respect for the man. When asked by a reporter if he would go play for the Yanks if Boston didn’t renew his contract he said No (and I’m paraphrasing here folks) because doing so would make his years in Boston mean nothing. I really thought that was classy especially classy coming from a man who I don’t think is classy in any form of the word. So bravo to him for that....but it ends there.

I drive my husband crazy. When I met him he told he wasn’t into sports except boxing. He loved the fights. Great I thought I hate watching people get hit or worse yet the horrible sound of getting hit. Oh jeez.

But he nows is a lover of all things Yankee. When we lived in Seattle during the playoffs with the Mariners he thought he would cheer on the home team since he didn't much care for baseball at that point in time. (not married long at that point)
Oooh that was ugly. He learned a valuable lesson....married to me you can not be a Red Sox fan or cheer the opposing team if you don't care either way. Whew.
He is now bleeding blue and white. :-)

I don’t care for all sports. Football makes me cringe....Neanderthal.
Golf is good for a nap and basketball and hockey are something that I can only enjoy if I am there in person and honestly I don’t much care to go because I’ve done it once that is enough.. Nascar – well that isn’t even a sport to me. For God’s sake you are driving around in a circle. It’s like the dumbing down of a real sport!

For me it’s baseball. A great double play is like ballet to me. To me that is pure beauty. The sound of the bat hitting the ball....aaah nothing better.

Between the NYY game stress and the stress of life right now it was an exhausting weekend. It’s only Monday so I have to recuperate.....But tomorrow is another day of physical therapy and boy that woman kills me. Torn rotator cuff – so you see my days of pitching for the Yankee’s are over now for sure ! They will have to win that pennant without me.

O.J. Simpson & Other Assorted Cranky Rants

I watched Oprah yesterday talking to the Goldman’s. It was painful to me. I am not sure I understand completely their thinking but its how they need to work through the pain so as long as OJ is not benefiting any more than he already has from this book I guess it’s okay to them to publish this book. But on the other side why the hell would anyone want to read this trash? Why would you want to allow it to be put out there for the world to see? I know if it had been my loved one I couldn’t bear the thought of everyone reading what the killer of my loved one did to them or to give the killer an audience.

Denise Brown was on Oprah as well and I completely understood where Denise Brown was coming from. (the Goldman's did make me see their point I just instinctively felt the same as Denise) In the end I would never ever buy this book nor would I ever read this book even if given to me for free. I would just burn that sucker.

The questions that no one asked yesterday that I kept thinking was how do Nicole’s children read this book and justify it with who their father is to them? I wonder if they too believe he didn’t do it? And putting aside if he did it or not - why in the hell would you put your children through something like this and say these horrific things about their mother as he did?

And then in today’s paper I read that O.J. is again in trouble. Big surprise huh?
I read that it was a break in at the Palace Station Casino in Vegas. Apparently the break-in involved sport collectibles that O.J. believed to be “his”. It said in the article that the police said they were getting 2 sides to this story. Hmmm....another big surprise there.

The only thing that surprises me when it comes to this person is that he is allowed to walk the streets as a free man! I can't wait for Karma for this guy.

A few more rants from Me, The Big Ole Curmudgeon........

• Can this election be over so I no longer have to see these TV ads telling me the war is wonderful? I know, I know, all this shit is going to get worse the closer we get to Election Day. I may seriously have to move to Canada until it’s over I swear.
• Why must people talk on the phone everywhere they go? Why? Why? Why? What the hell did these people do before cell phones? Did they just never leave their house so as to not miss a call? I was in the bathroom at Lowes last night for God’s sake and this woman was chatting up a storm while peeing – my God! You can let it ring and do your business and then call them back honestly you won’t die if you miss a call – honestly!!!!
• And while I’m ranting about phones – people can hear you if you talk in a normal tone – no need to scream people. I don't need to hear you - only those you are speaking with on the phone need to hear you.
• Why is the writing getting so small on all labels? Oh wait...that could be only me that notices that one.....oops sorry....”My Bad”
• Yeah C'mon - What is with this whole “my bad” shit. Hate it – stop saying it and for God’s sake if you are over 30 stop it now - it’s stupid, juvenile and you probably are more articulate than using that phrase would lead us to believe. Remember that thesaurus your Aunt gave you when you were going off to college? Open it up, find a new word or phrase for heaven’s sake. Be an original.
• Why do people let their small children leave the outgoing message on their voicemails? It’s not cute. You love your little Johnny and Mary but no one else understands them or finds their cutesy talk adorable. You’re the grown up and the phone is for grown ups. Leave your own damn message.

Have a good weekend everybody!

Take a Little Time to Enjoy the View....From My View

We “girls” were talking about The View and it got me to thinking.

It had such promise to me didn’t it to you?
5 women talking about topical news items and cultural events.
5 Smart Women discussing topics in the news sounded great to me. You don’t get to see smart women let alone talk about something other than folding my fitted sheets properly or making the perfect pie crust.

It was a Tivo staple for me for many years. I watched every show from the beginning. I never understood why the “young one” (Debbie) was fired because I used to watch and think Star was the annoying one. No I couldn’t relate to Debbie but I wasn’t suppose to I was not that young. Aside from Star's diva attitude each time she attempted to talk I couldn’t hear what she was saying I only heard her breathing – I was too focused on her loud labored breathing....and her “divadom”

Then Lisa Ling arrived. No real change and while I could never relate to her because of her youth and outlook I admired her. She was smart, attractive and very informed. (when she left to pursue her journalistic adventures I admired her immensely). To me Star was still the annoying one. Such a diva.

With every change I still enjoyed the show that described itself as a drinking show and not a cooking show. So I toasted that with my glass of Tanqueray and sat back and enjoyed the women on the View even though I never could relate to the “young one”.
It didn’t matter I wasn’t suppose to.

I watched as they had on air auditions for the new young one. I remember this woman/girl who was on MTV’s The Real World in I believe San Francisco. She was narrow minded, bigoted and looked like she was being goosed all the time with bulging eyes. She was mean to the young man who had AIDS and I disliked this girl with every fiber in me. She was so inflexible in spirit and mind that it was actually heartbreaking at times. When they had her on The View several times I would scream at the TV, vowing never to watch again if they picked her. They didn’t choose her thank God. Instead they picked someone I had never heard of because I didn’t watch Survivor at the time. She looked nice enough and was quiet most of the times when she was on so you didn’t know what you were getting.

OH BOY did we find out. I dislike Elizabeth Hasselbeck with every fiber in me.
I have never felt so strongly about someone I haven’t met. (Ok maybe I lied on that one , I felt this way about bulging eyes MTV girl and Bush, Cheney, Karl Rove, Trump, OJ Simpson to name a few) She is so sanctimonious, narrow minded, inflexible in spirit and mind as well as she appears mean and she just seems to me to be manipulative and backstabbing.
Hey I could be wrong...it’s just my opinion...on my blog.
I only know that when I see her I want to hurl things at my TV. When she speaks I want to cry and hurl things at my TV. It scares me that people actually think like her. My God that alone makes me want to cry.

She has no gray area and to me that is so sad and scary. That is the only thing that makes me feel badly for her. Because one day something can and probably will happen to her that will rock her world. And to get through it you need to learn to forgive, make amends and move on and see a gray area. Nothing is black and white. It reminds me of how the public liked to see Kathie Lee Gifford fall when her husband cheated on her. It was horrible and repulsive that people loved her misery. People would say to me that she was always going on about her perfect marriage and how she wouldn’t tolerate that etc and this was her just desserts. WTF? I don’t think that is a reason at all to feel happy about someone else’s pain but I did understand it...sadly enough.

Well guess what, you don’t know what you would do until it happens to you. You don’t know how you will feel until it happens to you. You can’t say a blanket statement on that. So when EH is on her high horse and being all sanctimonious as I call it, then when God forbid something happens to her she will be wondering why every one in the public is loving her bad fortune. Do I think that is nice or the right thing to do? ABSOULTELY NOT. I hate that about human kind. I will get no happiness for it. I just know that you can’t go through life throwing stones and not having a few thrown back at ya. I believe it’s called Karma.

But I digress....
I watched as Star was given the door. I felt uncomfortable like the rest of the world who watched. Why couldn’t she have had the dignity to walk away quietly and say her piece after the show? Why embarrass Barbara who gave you the job and the opportunity in the first place? Just another reason I don’t care for Star. It’s always about Star and don’t you get in her way. She was hell bent on upstaging and one upping BW. It was sad and pitiful to watch.

I was excited about the possibilities. I watched all the auditions and was THRILLED when I heard it would be Rosie.

I thought Rosie brought out the best in Joy too. I think Joy is very smart, quick and funny in a curmudgeon sort of way. (curmudgeon like me). I thought the show became more topical and I really enjoyed that.

I don’t always agree with Rosie but I love her passion. Sometimes I would think, “you know I agree with her but I sure wish she could have softened it or toned it down so she would be really heard.”
God knows why people, especially hetero men, can’t hear a woman let alone a woman who is loud and sometimes rough around the edges. But I realize that wouldn’t be Rosie if she toned it down.

The day of the split screen had nothing to do with the political topics. It was about a friend who was betrayed and the hurt I saw in Rosie’s eyes broke my heart. How didn’t the world see that? Was I the only one watching the show? Why was the focus on everything but that. You can be a very strong woman and still be sensitive and hurt by actions and words. Why wasn’t anyone seeing this?
I also thought – why are they doing a Jerry Springer type TV now with this split screen? And how much I really believe that EH is a manipulative bitch and why is she so protected there?
Or are the powers that be the type that are that manipulative or enjoy that type of work? Hmm......

Now the era of Whoopi. I love Whoopi. I love everything about her. Do I agree with her? Hell no I don’t agree 100% with anyone but me. But that doesn’t mean you can’t like them. She is warm, articulate, funny and cute as hell. I think it’s a bit more beige like the set. Vanilla shall we say. I haven’t watched them all because..well....EH makes me sick. But I will tune in from time to time I am sure. I am also sure that when EH goes on maternity leave I will watch it regularly again to get my dose of The View and see how Sherri is doing. (on first impression she is a bit like EH in view points only funny and she doesn't appear to have an agenda.....like EH.....yet.)

I did watch the other day to see how Sherri was doing. I saw an interview where Barbara once again interrupted the celebrity who was talking and who was answering another host’s question to ask the celebrity an insipid question like only she would do and I thought...okay Ms. Walters it’s time to think about retiring. (are you dating anyone?)
I have seen her do this several times. I do admire Ms. Walters and all of her hard work, her achievements, and her difficulties as a woman coming up in the era she did. Please understand how much I admire her for all the trails she blazed. But sometimes you need to look over your life and realize it’s time for you to stop and just enjoy the View from your perch and relax. I think it’s time now Barbara.

You’re probably wondering how the hell do I see so much tv? Tivo mainly, as well as I work from a home office so I do get to see some TV during my lunch etc.
There isn’t a lot of television during the day that doesn’t pertain to domestic chores for women other than soaps and trash TV like Springer and his like. I don't care for either thank you.

I had such hope for The View. Barbara had a great idea. It did a lot to make us think and laugh.
Did it turn into a bit of a cliché?.....I'm not sure....maybe but once again it was trailblazing.

So take some time and enjoy Your View in your world!
Keep an open mind – there is a lot of gray out there – you’d be surprised what you’ll learn in that gray area! Now go talk amongst yourselves!

And as Rosie would say....
Peace - Out

Back to the Ole Grind

Just back from a weeks vacation – oh God is it tough to get in the swing of things today.

Still a bit groggy.

Some pop culture musings.....
I heard that Caroline Rhea is no longer the host of The Biggest Loser because she was chubby. Wonder if that is true.

Why is Sen. Craig more interested in screaming he’s not gay than saying he didn’t do this? I find that interesting!

The View is starting it’s 11th season. I think it’s time to go off the air. Barbara is 80 and by God she just doesn’t “get it” and get rid of Elizabeth for God’s sake! I want to punch Elizabeth in the face and normally I don’t believe in violence... until I see her face that is. Hmmm....

Today is called Black Tuesday here in the DC Metro area. August traffic is down 10 – 15% “they” say with congress on vacation as well as we mere mortels. What takes you 25 minutes in August takes you over an hour in September. Today everyone is back to work and school and traffic is back to being the nightmare that we all learn to deal with. Aah life in the city as my mom would say. The price you pay to live in a great area.

You know what? I can’t do much today. My mind is still in vacation mode or perhaps I killed a few too many brain cells while on vacation. I am thinking about being back on the water today with a gin and tonic but instead I am in my office looking out the window- the blue sky and the sun shining trying to get moving to do the things that need to be done. I bet this is a very unproductive day for everyone just returning to school, work etc.

Oh the grind of it all.

Where is the Outrage?

I have been reading the Washington Post this morning and seeing bits and pieces on the news about Michael Vick and the felony he committed.
People are truly outraged by the killing and torturing of these animals. People are protesting and asking for him to get the most punishment that he can receive by law. People are in the streets carrying signs about this. They were outraged enough to give of their time to protest this topic and that is what has gotten me fired up today.

Okay let me say this before I go on my rant....
I think that torturing of any animal, breeding an animal to kill or to put it simply- being mean to an animal in anyway is DISPICABLE! END OF STORY NO EXCEPTIONS.
(didn't Jeffrey Dahmer enjoy doing that?)

But where the hell is this outrage that everyone is giving over the animals when an agressive football player takes his agressiveness off the field to his home and pummels his wife, his partner, his children? Where are the protests then? Where is everyone when the wife/girl friend is shown with black eyes, broken bones and bruises on the news? Oh apparently that's okay as long as he doesn't kick the dog?

I don't mean that one is more important than another but I am asking why does the general public appear to think so? Dogs seem to be more important than people.
Are they the same people who let OJ get away with murdering 2 innocent people?
Can someone please explain to me why dogs will get everyone in an outrage enough to protest in the streets but not humans? And please don't use the excuse they can't defend themselves because that would be a bullshit answer.
Neither can a woman who is being pummeled by a man 2x her size or a child.

This just pisses me off. I love dogs. But my God why is this nation so much nicer to dogs than people? C'mon people use this rage to vent and protest the thousands that are being killed in this senseless war! Protest the agressive behavior of all who hurt innocent women, children and who cause hate crimes. Where are the protesters then?

I read some dumb ass celebrity (jamie fox) say that Vicks was a "brother" and that is done in the community? They were being too hard on him this was just dogs. HUH??? He is an educated man of 27 or so and went to college at Virginia Tech. He is not stupid. He knows right from wrong. Obvisouly not a nice person but that doesn't equate to stupid.
You commit a crime you do the time as the saying goes. This is a felony. You commit a felony you pay the consequenes.

Back to my original rant - Can someone please explain to me why dogs will get everyone in an outrage enough to protest in the streests but the torture or killing of a human being will not?

My Mantra

As of late I have begun to dislike people. Sadly this has become my mantra. I used to try not to be like this but it seems to be getting more and more difficult to feel another way. So I have decided to just succumb....I don’t like people – period end of story.

Ever spend time in an airport? Then you know why.
But I digress.....

I am not prejudice with my dislike toward people these days – just seem to dislike them all.
The other day I came home early. I had just walked into the house from getting the mail and heard the door bell ring while my hand was still on the door. There was a very nice looking young man standing at the door with another good looking young stud behind him. They were both dressed nicely and were wearing chains around their necks holding pictures that appeared to be an official looking badge type thing that they shoved in my face and began to speak so quickly you would have thought this was speed dating. He told me they worked for Unity XYZ (I don't want trouble so I will not reveal their company name here) and Unity XYZ’s idea is to motivate young people without means to learn on the job business skills by going door to door selling magazine subscriptions and receiving these points and these points would get them yada yada yada........

To me this sounded like something I saw on Dateline, 20/20, or 60 minutes - one of those shows. Because I have been scammed before I summoned the courage to say, No to them this time and I would not buy anything from them unless I checked them out online first.
I told them it sounded like something I had seen on TV. I would like to go online to verify and if this was indeed a positive role model company trying to help disadvantaged young people then I would be more than happy to order magazine subscriptions if they would give me a minute or come back.

Well you should have seen their faces. They both looked at one another and back at me as though they didn’t understand my language. I told them to give me time to check this company out and since they were in the neighborhood they might want to just stop back before they call it a day and I would buy something if it all checks out as they stated.
Then they asked for some cold bottled water. Hmm....appeared to be stalling for some reason but why? Or were they really thirsty and if so I couldn’t just say no it was hot as hell out there - I don't like people but I am not mean. I said I didn’t have any bottled water which in fact was true but I had just made some Kool-Aid so I gave them Kool-aid in disposable plastic cups and on they went.
I know I know - you're thinking sucker!!...and why does a grown woman with no children have Kool-Aid? Well, truth be told I always have rasberry Kool-aid in warm weather....you know for my gin!....a little trick from my younger very poor days when I was too broke to even go to the store to buy tonic and before I learned to LOVE straight gin chilled with 3 olives...hey old habits die hard.

I checked the website - it wasn’t even in English. I then went to BBB and there were complaints. AND SURPRISE -they never came back.
I told myself for days that they never returned because they were a BIG FAT SCAM.
BUT I have to admit my bleeding liberal heart thought perhaps these poor kids really could have used my lousy $20 subscription and for heaven’s sake I spend more than that on a bottle of wine. How awful can I be for heaven’s sake – I need to stop seeing the negative in people! Bad, Bad, Margaret.
So there I am doubting myself even after I saw the website thinking I MAY have been wrong and I should have helped them.

Well today I received vindication that I was right - I guess I dislike people with good reason. This was a big fat scam. My neighborhood watch and sheriff have informed us of many who did donate and after further follow-up by the sheriff’s department this is indeed a scam. A great many of the people here paid them money and lots of it. I bet they never see a magazine and if they used a check they have their account number. Yikes.

While I was feeling terribly guilty, thankfully I was right.
For some reason being right on this isn’t as rewarding as one would think.....I still dislike people but sometimes it pains me.