😪

I got a text on Wednesday night from my dear friend in California. You may recall when we went out to visit Rick's family in Orange County we stopped and spent a day with our friends Rusty and Therese in Mission Viejo. 

We have been friends since 1995 when we met in Seattle. It's been a long crazy friendship. We would meet in Chicago when she attended an interior designer event each year. I would go into Chicago the weekend before the event so we could play over the weekend and then she would begin her conference on Monday for the full week and I'd head home.

She always had business in DC so I got to see her a lot from that as well. She did interior design and office modules etc for government offices around the country.

Anyway, my dear friend texted to tell me she was diagnosed with Dementia/AZL.

She told me that was why she hasn't responded, written, or called me. I am gob-smacked. This is all I've been able to think about for the last 24 hrs. This is too close to home as Rick said. She is 53. Only 53. 

I am afraid to ask too much. I don't know where they are emotionally and mentally. She did say in her text that she has been laying low and trying to come to terms with this. She is enrolled in something at UCI. Which I assume is University of California Irvine.  I did not speak with her on the phone. Last week when I called her she never responded so maybe when she text me back she did so because she can't talk about it yet. So I let everything go. I hope they tell me something when they know more. But my God this is heartbreaking.

Rusty and Rick both worked in the same office in Seattle. Rusty and Rick hit it off immediately. I met Rick one day for lunch and he introduced me to Rusty. I liked him right off the bat.  I saw why he and Rick hit it off.  One day Rick told me he met Rusty's wife. She was a firecracker. You will love her he kept saying. 

We were new in Seattle and the only people we knew at this point where those Rick worked with. We were invited to a party at one of the co-workers home. Rick came home and told me and said that Rusty is bringing his wife. I said, "good I can't wait to meet her"  He said, "I didn't tell you this but she's 22 yrs younger than Rusty. She is in college right now"   OMG Richard, is she a bimbo? Dating the older guy with money?

Margaret no, don't make assumptions. I'm telling you right now you'll eat your words and you two will end up the best of friends.

Okay, you're right. But c'mon 22 yrs younger? Rusty was all of 43/44. I admit I was a bit bummed. Because I needed a new friend here and Rick went on and on about he knew we would be friends but I'm thinking she's only 21/22 yrs old. I am 38 yrs old at the time.  Fast forward to the party. I met her and after talking to her I said to Rick, "Okay so she's the mature one!"  They all laughed.  She never once seemed like a kid to me. She was funny, smart, sassy and boy she had Rusty's number. When they met she was in school and waitressing. Then she took off a year to just work so she could get more money. She had a very meager upbringing with a single mom. This girl understood working. By the time she married Rusty she was in school full time and she finished shortly after we met.

When the owner of the company Rick and Rusty worked for was taken out in handcuffs for embezzling amongst a shitload of equally horrible things they were out of a job. But Therese knew what she wanted. She began working as a designer at a firm. But she knew she wanted her own firm. They decided to move to California after the job loss just as we moved. That is where with Rusty's help they built their business. Or as we tease her, Her empire.

It has grown into a multi-million dollar company. Then after we moved here last fall she told me they were going to try to sell the business. I realize Rusty had stepped back due to his health and age but I was surprised to hear this. He was still working just not 60 hrs a week like she does. Now that makes even more sense to me now. She can't continue. I know they have great long-term employees but she can't work like she did anymore. So now I understood why she was selling her "baby" 

Therese and Rusty never had children. Rusty has a grown son who lives in Europe.

So it is just them and their cat. 

I want to fly out there and do something. But I know logically there is nothing I can do for them at this stage. I wrote to Rusty to ask him some things and to let him know Rick and I are both here even if as a caregiver he just wants to unload and vent.

 I can't even begin to understand what Rusty must be going through. My heart aches for them both.

Okay, these are the only pics of us together I could find that we weren't on a boat looking like wet rats, in bathing suits, or laughing so hard only the roof of our mouths was showing. This was in 2016 or 2017 in Chicago for a fun weekend. Since we look so serious I will assume it was right after arrival and our first cocktail.  This is why I don't let people take my photo!