My husband calls this my “blog world”
I speak about my blogger friends as though I was having lunch with them he says.
Well I kind of do.
On my lunch break I am reading blogs so you can assume I am having lunch with my blogger friends then right?
He has asked me about this one or that.
What are they like, where do they live, what do they write about.
I show him the stages of someone new home or kitchen renovation.
I show him pictures of adorable kids.
I have told him sad stories and happy stories.
I have shared with him some funnies and thought provoking posts.
He was being very curious George this past week.
Then he asked me a good question after I described someone.
He asked, “Margaret if you just met this person say at work or a party do you think you would be friends?”
My knee jerk reaction was "Of course they would be my friends, why wouldn’t they?"
But I admit that really got my wheels turning all this week.He just said to me, "Think about it."
And that is all I’ve done is think about it.
But you know as the days went on I kept thinking about it and I had to admit that I may not be friends with some of the wonderful people that I really connect with via their blogs.
And that would be my loss. My Big Loss.
We tend to judge people by how they look. We tend to see how they are dressed and immediately judge them. (I say We here but I am talking about me too at times)
You may think she is so different from me and you may not approach them yet in the blogger world you see the real them not their clothes, their homes, their career.
In the blogger world it may not matter that they are Birckenstock people and you prefer Christian Louboutin. Hey someone could actually enjoy wearing socks with sandals and others find that a crime that should be punished!
Because in the blogger world you really get an essence of who people are without the outside making you prejudge.
I mean haven’t you read someone for awhile, maybe when you read me, and you’ve enjoyed them and then it takes an ugly turn for you and it begins to be things you are just so not comfortable with? So you slowly move away from their blog. Doesn’t mean anything bad, it just means it’s not for you. But isn’t it better that we realize that the person isn’t our cup of tea instead of an assumption by what they look like, wear or their social status?
I have always tried to not do all I have just mentioned but I admit I do fail at it at times.
I remember when I first met my husband who I thought he was by how he looked and who he really is so vastly different. (thank goodness)
There are some blogger friends I would love to meet and just give a big ole hug to.
There are some I would just love to sit and chat with because I find them so interesting.
There are some I wish to do both.
Then there are some blogger friends that are 180 degrees from my views but I really really like them and I admit that I may have walked away if it hadn’t been “my blog world”
How sad for me. And that has been really bothering me.
So I guess I am growing from this and I am thankful.
Can I tell you how much I hate it when my husband does this to me? No one likes to admit anything ugly about themselves.
But I am glad he did. Just another damn thing I have to work on here in life.
Have you ever thought about it?
Would you be friends with your blogger friends if you met them and never read them first?
So thanks for stopping by and reading me.
Thanks for all the times you comment and come into my world.
Now enough serious shit I'm off to the lake house to drink gin martini's and relax.
15 comments:
yes I would totally be friends with many of them..you included...and I want to be off to the Lake house as well...with my tequila...its true that sometimes we never get to see the real part of people because we judged on the fake parts....I must admit Im pretty open and usually give all a chance..Ive never been one to judge on appearance...but sometimes people use outer appearances to keep folks away...and to keep themselves on a pedestal...Im not really into people who use material things to describe who they are...I like to use descriptions like funny, intelligent, clever, empathetic, interesting, compassionate adventurous....and so on...and I think in the blog world..we get a glimpse of those things...!Great Post Margaret..Thanks to your Hubs as well..!
i love this and i couldnt agree more. i have an awful time making friends in real life. in a lot of ways im scared of being judged, but i know i do a lot of judging myself, although i try not to.
the blog world has been wonderful for me. ive made more friends, more good friends, in the last two years than i have in my entire life.
Hmmm what a thought provoking post! I have just come from an hour of punishment with my trainer and put R. to bed so this kind of thought is making my brain hurt! hehe. There are a handful of bloggers who are just that 'extra' special to me and I just know that we would get along in the 'real world'. My hubby does not know the extent of how I blog. He is an extremely private person and if I told him that I was going to meet a blog friend he would freak. I like having blog friends. I can bounce ideas off them, share with them and find it cathartic. And I am totally hijacking your comments. Sorry. I do not like to name favorites but I do have one blog friend who, when I feel like quitting blogging is the reason why I stay. She lives in Rhode Island and likes Gene Wilder as I do. :) Enjoy your G&T. I am drinking water after working out and thinking about a shot of whiskey to follow
SmArtee - I agree with all you said. I love funny, warm, open, empathetic, smart women. I find them here. But hubby did make me realize that at times I may see let's say a biker gal and I may just smile and say hello and not pursue what could be a great friendship because we are different. And btw, back at cha - you remind me of all my family and friends growing up. So you know I'd be stickin' to ya like glue.
Tammie - I do as well. But here it's been so easy. And whether you want it or not you're stuck with me. :-)
Clare - I know who you are referring to and she's a great pic for a good friend! Good taste my dear! It's funny how we all read one another and there are days we feel each others pain or happiness or sadness. I am blown away by how that has happened to me. When Nashville flooded I thought of you. Silly isn't it? Thanks for commenting.
i love this post peggy! and i think we would totally be friends in "real life". i'm with tammie, i kind of have a hard time making friends. i have no problems with acquaintances...but i seem to have difficulty relating to people (or them relating to me) on a deeper level. i don't have a whole ton of regular readers...really just you, tammie, and cousin it. obviously cousin it i am friends/family with in the real world. but i consider you and tammie real friends as well. so there, you're stuck with me ;)
Oh my! I often wonder what picture of me is painted by my words? Would people like me in "real" life.
The truth is I had a terrible time making friends growing up. I always felt so isolated. I feel like I belong to a very large world now.
I think one of the reasons I use my picture on my blog and Twitter is I want to put my image in people's head. I think my blog is an accurate portrayal of who I am.
However, my job requires me to not have purple hair so my rebel streak doesn't always shine through to my everyday life.
Those few times I have met blog or Twitter friends I don't want them to be shocked bu the super model they are seeing. Don't judge me because I am beautiful. (by the way this is what happens when I am up too late and I let the voices in my head write notes on people's blogs).
Oh,Chris but it does. That is what is so cool about blogging. If one really pays attention the person is loud and clear, which is vastly different from how one would behave in a public setting.Holding back etc. One would tend to be cautious in that situation sometimes for a lot of various reasons.
This is what fascinates me about all of this…..btw thanks for stopping by and reading!
This is definitely something to ponder. I do love the friends I've made through blogging but, in real life I would never have the time to actually keep up with these friendships. Also, we do tend to spend our time with the people with which we have the most things in common. I don't think you and I have a lot in common however, I love your blog, your comments on mine and how you've been there for me bloggy wise. It just goes to show that looking or beliving a certain way is not the important thing. Who a person is becomes more evident when they write down their innermost feelings or even their every day lives to share with others. Whatever the reasons - I'm sticking with you and I hope you stick with me.
So true. I've made friend through blogging that I don't think I would normally "hang out with" face to face. I had the chance to meet one lady that is a blogging friend. It was an interesting encounter, but I think my wife and I enjoyed our brief time with her. There are others that I think I will meet someday—I've got to meet them someday. They've become good friends.
You and me? Why sure we'd hang out! Your husband would have to take me fishing. :-)
okay Rick so it's not me that you'd want to hang out with it's my hubby Rick so you guys can do all that fishing. See how you are?
Well, I can't put on here that I want to come and hang out in the back of the boat with you and the bottle. :-)
Gee when you put it like that Rick......
:-)
More col (Chuckle out loud).
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