Monday from hell

What a Monday I am having.
I had this “growth” on my eyelid removed this morning @ 8am. I had it done early because I wanted to be back in the office by 9am.

Dear Lord is it killing me right now. First of all I had it removed 10 yrs ago and the little fucker came back. I had no issues last time. Nada. Had it removed drove home. Stitches melted away. No big deal. No pain, no swelling, no bruising.

Well let me tell you they found a way to make this a helluva lot worse in 10 years. Since when do medical procedures go backwards? As soon as they injected the stuff to numb me it began to swell and from the conversation the doctor was having with the nurse it was bruising right away as well. It feels so weird to feel your eye numb. Anyway I am lying there thinking, “Hmmm.....I have to drive myself home and if this swells a helluva lot more I believe I am going to have an issue. Sure enough it swells more so I now have to drive home with 1 eye. Like my driving isn’t bad enough with 2 eyes.....as hubby will attest. Thankfully I made it home safely.

Right now this fucker is burning and throbbing and just hurts like a bear. I’ll tell ya this was so easy last time that its hard to believe it's the same thing.
My God is it because I am 10 years older now? I can’t take much more of this throbbing and I have a high tolerance for pain. I may have to start medicating here soon. Not always good while working and talking to customers.

But on a good note my rotator cuff is healing quite nicely. As of this weekend I can now lift my arms over my head. Yipee! See what happens when you’re old?... you get the biggest thrill from having use of your limbs. My sad pathetic life....God it’s come to this - I'm writing about my ailments. What next, eating dinner at 4pm?

Biscuits and Kegs

Remember when I told you that I love going to our lake home but when I leave the home and go to town and are among the people is when I realize I could NEVER live here.
Oh it’s fine during the tourist season but right now just amongst the locals it’s a trip for this city girl.

Here are a few of the pictures I captured over the Easter Holiday. After being out and about I can’t wait to get back to my sanctuary on the water or go back up north. Now you'll see why I swear our IQ goes up many many points the minute we get back up here among people who have read a book since high school and who can spell license. (see photo)

Check these out....
I know I think guns when I think about having my taxes done!
And then biscuits and beer what a great combo....or did they spell biscuits wrong because they already hit that keg?

Easter Weekend

Late yesterday afternoon we drove down to our lake home. It’s a 3 ½ - 4 hr drive for us. Hubby has a job today down in this area. He was asked if he would train someone about 30 minutes from here and how can you pass up coming down to our lake home and getting paid for it? I forward the office phones to here and bring the laptop and I can still work. It’s nice to work in a different environment. Although I must say in summer especially as I sit here and look out the window at the water and the boat I want to be out there instead of at the mercy of the phone and laptop. But then I remember that it could be worse and when I’m done I can walk down the back yard to the dock and have a cocktail while my feet dangle in the water.

Even a bad work day here is better than a bad work day anywhere else.
You know what else I noticed today?
I am sitting here at my kitchen table as a make-shift desk and looking at my surroundings.
Up north in the city we have a beautiful 3 level townhome. Mahogany wood floors and 12ft ceilings and nicely appointed for the most part. I love our townhome. Here our home is nice on 1 acre lot with 125 ft. of waterfront. We have lesser furnishings and I would say it's definiely a more modest of a home with fewer conveniences but here I am more calm and laid back than most days.

In the city we have all the conveniences that we have come to take for granted.
Little conveniences that I love like a garbage disposal, city water, garbage pick up, stores galore, Costco and people who know the value of time management.
Here I deal with a well so no garbage disposal, a drought last year that had us a bit concerned of a well going dry. We don’t have garbage pickup so every couple of days you have to drive to an assigned garbage area to drop off your garbage. (in summer you can find this place by the lovely aroma of garbage in 100 degree heat)
I miss any type of shopping that most of America is familiar with and God knows I have withdrawal during the summer months here for Costco.
The people here move slowly. If there is a word that means slower than slowly that would be the word I would choose. I don’t know such a word but everyone here doesn’t really pay any mind to a watch or the clock. This can make this city girl and her city hubby go crazy!

This morning I had an appointment for 10:30a.m. It’s already 11:30a.m. I bet they won’t be here until 2:00pm if I’m lucky at all. I called to reconfirm and they said I was the first appointment of the day so they should be here on time. Although they wanted to point out they have a 3 hour window. That made me laugh. 3 hour window and I am the very 1st appointment of the day. See what I mean? If they do show up at all that is more than most down here. We have made several appointments over the years for an assortment of contractors, landscapers, cable, phone, etc and most don’t show up and don’t call. When you call them they laugh in that slow way and say that “we’ll be there” as though my time means diddly shit. (take “slow” any way you want…mental or in rhythm) Usually we only have a couple of days here unless we are on vacation so we don’t have time for them to “get here”. Aaargh!

But having said all of that here is what I notice each and every time I get here.
My blood pressure lowers and my shoulders relax and I am so laid back (for me) and calm it’s like I’m in Jamaica and “every tings irie mon”.

I open the door,I drop my belongs on a chair and immediately walk out back and take in the lake air, sit on the porch and a calm just comes over me. I can not explain it but I so wish I was articulate enough to explain it to you all. As long as I just hang around my small slice of heaven I am a very happy camper. (going into town here frustrates me and makes my blood pressure go up but that’s another day ….)

See the picture on the right by my name? That is a picture of a bottle of wine floating here at the Lake. Yea, do a lot of that here. That view is from our cove off our dock. When I’m here I don’t care what clothes I am wearing but what bathing suit is dry or where my flip flops may be. When I’m here I don’t care about putting on my makeup just putting on my sunscreen. When I am here I don’t care if my window treatments need updating but how fast can I get in that hammock with a good book? When I’m here I don’t worry about what to make for dinner because neither of us care as long as we have ice for the cocktails. I have no cares here and that is so priceless.
But why can’t we take that home with us each time we leave? That’s what I wonder.

Today it is only 65 degrees so I am not sunning but I will be in the hammock later with something to read, a great beverage(wink, wink)and I think I hear a nap coming on.

Now if I can just get my hands on a Cadbury Egg - man the weekend would be complete.

Happy Easter Weekend Every body!

A Yankee Day

I just had a full day of Yankee’s on Tuesday. I am a happy camper.
Still boycotting politics and keeping everything light and happy, happy, happy.

My boys of summer went to play an exhibition game down in Blacksburg VA at Virginia Tech yesterday and the only thing better for me is if I had been there.

It’s been written that within five minutes of watching the TV coverage, George Steinbrenner immediately called the team president with instructions to find out how the Yankees could help. The Yankees donated $1 million to a memorial fund for the victims, had a Virginia Tech night at Yankee Stadium and inquired about playing an exhibition against the Hokies as well.

At yesterday’s introduction prior to the start of the exhibition game VT announced that the Yanks ....you know the Evil Empire as media likes to call them....were the first to call VT to offer condolences and ask what they could do.
VT spoke about how much that meant to Virginia Tech in their healing and how even the die hard Red Sox fans on the faculty had a different view of the Yankees and will forever after their generous show of support both emotionally, financially and the giving of their time.

The stadium was filled with over 5,000 people. Tickets were on a lottery basis. I know I tried to get tickets. I even tried Craig’s List and someone said he’d sell them to me but they weren’t letting anyone in without a VT photo ID did I have one? Ah, no. I called the school but they said No to any outsiders unless I knew someone. Nope, don’t know anyone. I was disappointed but realized this wasn’t for me but for the healing of the VT community. That is the lesson for the whole day and event.

I did find out yesterday that MLB.com was streaming it live and for FREE. So I got to watch it live and that is pretty damn good too. Oh hell who am I kidding, I was giddy and it was great! Not the game certainly. I mean these are college kids playing Major leaguers so how good could the game be. But the whole feeling of it....The smiles all over these ball players faces on the VT team. I saw some of the interviews and they were so thrilled to be playing with major league players, let alone the Yankees. I actually was rooting for VT to hit a homerun or to rob Jeter from a base hit. I was watching the VT players when the Yanks would get to base – they would talk their ears off and it was so much fun to see.

I watched the fans get autographs and A-Rod playing in a "game show" of sorts with the VT dugout. There were emotional moments as well when they walked around the limestone memorials for each fallen student or professor. One had a Number 2 jersey next to it and Derek Jeter (2) was taken aback. This young man who was shot and killed was a Yankee fan from New Jersey and a student at VT. His finance put the Jersey there and asked Derek to sign it and could she get a picture of the "3" of them together. He said he would but she had to smile. She did. But they both had eyes welling up with tears and I did too watching it all take place.

Aah, the “Evil Empire” doing what they do best,bringing smiles and class once again to another situation.
As the baseball saying goes.....I live for this!

Happines and Puppies (in other words no politics)

Since I am avoiding the real world right now I thought I would share something that happened in a 2 week period and lasted over a month. This true story happened 2 years ago this month and still makes me laugh (poor hubby) and since I am avoiding all things not light and fun right now I thought I would share this with ya'll. Sorry for the duplication to those that lived it with me back then.


Hubby, being the ever supportive husband that he is just gave me permission to quit my job and leave us with 50% of our household income going out the window.(YIKES)
But since I was depressed, crying all the time, having heart palpitations and just plain being a bitch he may just have wanted me to shut up and quit bitching – but I digress, I want to believe he was being ever so supportive.....you know like me.

I had just been off work for just enough time to be able to sleep again and not think about work.
It was dark out and I was sound asleep when I heard a loud THUD. A thud that was distinctively my 6’2” hubby who is built like a linebacker falling to the floor. Being the sweet thing that I am I pretend I don’t hear this because damn it, I can sleep in today! But then the THUD begins to moan. So I say in my supportive wife voice, “Honey are you okay?” He whimpers back, “No” AH DAMN IT, I am going to have to open my eyes and get out of this warm bed ...son ofva bitch!

So I get up to find his naked ass on the floor. He is attempting to get up to the bed. So I assist him to the bed and he is withering in pain. I ask him what the hell he did (all the while mustering support but I just wanna go back to bed)
He tells me he has no idea. NO IDEA? You fall out of bed and you have no idea where this pain came from? Weren’t you fine when you went to bed?
He insists in his macho way that he can get up and shower for work. He tries to stand and gets right back to the bed.....a few times. He can not stand.
Finally he is able to hobble to the shower.
I suggest I drive him to work because this is his right leg – his driving leg for heaven’s sake.
But of course he’s a macho ass man who can not admit that he’s not 25 and invincible.
He will drive and kill himself to show me he’s just fine! Hey, as long as the life insurance policy is up to date then Hubby can go drive into traffic.

He comes home that evening and tries ice, tries heat, bitching, and then finally percocet and alcohol. The latter two seem to work best. I say, “How about I make an appointment for you to see an orthopedist?” “Oh let’s give it a few more days” he says.
As the ever obedient wife I immediately go upstairs to the computer and look for a doctor in our health care network.
The following day I make an appointment for my stubborn husband who is still insisting he does not need to see a doctor.
He whines for a week but secretly loves having my left over percocets with alcohol and acts like I don’t know it.
Yep he’s old, but not so mature just yet....but ya gotta love him.

Fast forward – He goes to the doctor and they give him a shot and comes home all cocky like it’s no big deal.
I don’t want to make him cry so I don’t tell him that this will not last forever – I mean I am the supportive wife right?

Now he thinks he is fine and indestructible. A week or so later he awakes to a throbbing big toe.
I see him limping into the shower in the morning as he gets out of bed. I ask what happened to you overnight for heavens sake?!
He says, “I don’t know but my toe is huge and red and it’s killing me”....”Look at it Margaret!”
Again attempting to be sympathetic and supportive I laugh. (bad margaret!)
But I recover by saying did this hurt before bed? No, was his reply.
Hmmm......that’s a head scratcher.

I’m thinking he has begun to hit himself after I fall asleep to steal more of my percocets.
BUT I am the ever supportive wife so I do not mention this.

He whimpers and limps for a week. On Sunday he can no longer wear shoes and I say for the 315th time that I think we need to go to the doctors or Urgent Care today. He fights me at first about this.
I know, I know, I should have told him they were giving out Vicodin and fishing lures at Urgent Care on Sundays between 1 – 3pm to the first 50 people in the door to lure him there.
But hey I said I was supportive not smart.

We get him to Urgent Care and he comes out with prescriptions in his hand and I think this will make him happy but he looks pissed off.
We get outside and he tells me he has Gout. For some reason I do not even fake support, I laugh uncontrollably because for some reason that sounds like something that an 80 yr old would have. They tell him to stop drinking. I laugh some more. I say, “can you still have drugs?” ha ha -he doesn’t see the humor in that because the drugs they gave him are not fun ones apparently and they only HELP the problem not take it away entirely. Oh I am gonna have a grouch on my hands I see. I will have to give him some more of my left over “candy” to keep him happy I see.

Good thing I have a very bad back. I don’t like to take drugs unless I am close to death and I get a ton of ‘em. I now believe that is the main reason he married me.
Sure he says a lot of sweet nothings every day but I said I was slow not stupid folks!!

Poor Old Man – he goes to bed feeling fine and now wakes up with injuries.
.....and being the supportive wife I am - I remind him of this every chance I get.

It just keeps getting worse .....

It just gets worse doesn't it?
Listen for yourself - please!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/03/12/olbermann-slams-clinton-i_n_91256.html

I promise to stop reading the papers, the internet and watching the news.
I need to go towards the light and a happy place.
Delusion may be a good state to visit.
I promise!

The Stupid People are everywhere of late.

Have we gone back in time? Where everyone of late is racist, homophobic and just plain stupid? Is this 1950 where we are afraid of everything that is different? And lastly I ask you....why must everyone who doesn't get their way be a fuckin' victim?

I read this morning that numb nuts below said the following.

"I wish I were a black man," Ms. Ferraro told CNN's Wolf Blitzer. "That way, I could make all the racist comments about black men that I wanted to and no one would call me a racist."

Ms. Ferraro added, "As it is, being a white woman, when I make racist remarks about black men everyone accuses me of being a racist."

"This is why being a white woman totally sucks," Ms. Ferraro said.

The former New York congresswoman also said that she wished her middle name was 'Hussein,' explaining, "If my middle name was Hussein I'd be President by now."


WTF????? In the first place you want to make racist comments why?

If you hadn’t told me who said this I would have assumed Bill O’Reilly.

Oh yea, being a white woman sucks. Cry me a river. PLEASE.
She is a rich white woman how awful for her.
God how women like that fry my ass and ruin it for all legitimate feminist.
Save the pity for the abused woman, the single mom who was left with 3 kids to support with little financial security, the woman who is working a full time job along with her husband to feed, provide insurance and to be able to send her children to college and then still come home to a full time job of mothering, maid and wife. I will not feel sorry for this stupid woman named Ferraro with all the advantages of life. What a horrific statement. Let alone what being a black man in today's society is like. No comparision. NONE.

Maybe it’s so terrible for her because she is a gigantic stupid white woman!!

Today's Super Idiot of the Day....the winner is

Today’s winner of Super Idiot of the day is amazingly not a repugnant republican; you know of the ilk of say Bill O’Reilly, but instead just an all around Basic Numb Nut Bible Thumping Holier than thou Idiot.
The award goes to.....(drum roll please) “Dr.” Laura Schlessinger.

Let me show you a bit of the Today’s show conversation here...
Meredith: Are you saying that women should feel guilty, like they somehow drove the man to cheat?

Dr. Laura Schlessinger: You know what, the cheating was his decision to repair what's damaged and to feed himself where he's starving. But yes, I hold women accountable for tossing out perfectly good men by not treating them with the love, kindness, respect and attention they need.

Oh my God is all I can say!

Former Governor Spitzer

While watching the Governor’s speech about his “unfortunate indiscretions” I was unable to stop watching his wife. What the hell was going through her mind?
For the life of me I do not understand why these political wives stand there looking so supportive and pained while their spouse has humiliated them in public. What do they have to gain from that? I know they love him but for God’s sake what the hell are they thinking they are proving by doing this? They are not running for office. To me that is such a bad example to show her daughters as well.

I think she could talk to her daughters about this pain and that she has decided that Dad needs to do this alone because it’s about his job right now. The job he does alone.
We as a family will deal with this incident privately. This way she is showing her daughters that this behavior is unacceptable and I am not willing to be treated in this disrespectful manner therefore you girls shouldn’t either. It also shows her daughters by example that this is a private matter that will be dealt with privately after he deals with his job and constituents. To me standing there staring at him while he makes his speech to his constituents gives her daughters, and all women, a bad message.

Look, I am not a complete cold hearted bitch. I get why you may want to repair your marriage, work on the issues at hand, eventually forgive him and stand by your man.
I could see myself doing all of that depending on what was done to me.
However for the life of me I do not get why she has to be there standing next to him.
As a public figure he owes this apology to his constituents. This is not the time for his wife to be there. That is private. She is not in office. He is. This is his job that he mucked up. Not her job. This has nothing to do with her as far as his job which is why he is there to begin with. Isn’t it bad enough that he has embarrassed his and her family already being all over the newspapers etc?

How many husbands do you think would do that for their wives? Okay maybe Bill Clinton since I believe their marriage isn’t real anyway. He would do it as a pay back for all the shit he put Hillary through and to continue their need to dominate the world. Power in numbers I guess is their logic....two against 1. It’s worked for them so far.

But most men would sooner have a swift kick in the nuts than stand there while their wife makes a fool out of them publicly. No man I know would stand by his wife after such an incident....I’ve been asking. I haven’t gotten a yes I would yet.
Oh he may stand by her in private. He may want to work on their issues. He may seek counseling. He may even stay and make the marriage stronger. But I doubt you’d find many men who would stand next to their wife as she apologized for using an escort service for sexual gratification in public and look at her loveingly and supportive. Their ego wouldn’t allow it and damn it neither should a woman’s.

C’mon Kathy (C.) – help me here.... am I wrong here?

This Friday's bullet points

**The phone book company called me back. A nice person this time.
They actually apologized for the problem as well as that lovely woman who called me earlier and went on to talk about how to fix it. Wow..offering a solution without the customer having to ask. Novel idea in the service industry huh?
At the end of it all I thanked him for his time, patience, and assistance in trying to get this rectified. And he actually said, "no problem that is what I'm here for." Holy shit I got service! Needed to tell you since I rant all the time about it. His name was Stephen and he works for the Verizon phone books in Northern Virginia. We love Stephen! Now that is the way it's done.

**I absolutely loved Larry David's take on Hillary Clinton picking up the red phone.
If you haven't read it you may just think it's as funny & sadly as true as I do.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/larry-david/on-the-red-phone_b_90338.html

**Is anyone watching Eli Stone? I must say that it's odd and quirky but I have grown to love it. Just thought I'd share.

**We have a damn chipmunk living in one of our huge pots on our terrace. I hate the little furry fucker. I want him gone. My hubby put out a trap and he sits NEXT to it on the bench. This morning while standing at the back door looking at the damn critter hubby says, "I think he's mocking me" That made me howl. But the shit is mocking us. Hopefully this weekend he can get it out of here. Since we are closed in with fences on either side of the town house it won't be easy. I don't think chipmunks or squirrels are cute....just rats with a furry tail. Rat bastards!

**Why are people allowed to have children? You have to have a license to drive but it's their right to have a child with no thought into this what so ever or license or training. This crazy ass woman took her 2 year old to a car wash and turned the power washer on her for disipline. Gee, what a surprise her skin peeled off. And this nut job woman is pregnant with another child soon on the way. Now last year I was having some gin and tonic's while power washing my deck at our lake house. (note to self: never do that again unless you are sober) I went over my foot by accident (in flip flops) and I let out a scream that brought the neighbors - an acre away. Let me tell you this wasn't just a "ouchie" this was a full fledged wound. It was a big open wound to fleshy parts I did not want to see inside my foot and it hurt like hell. So how the hell could you do this to the body of a 2 yr old?
To quote Bob Barker - Spay and neuter this woman STAT!!

**Still can't get these gorgeous diamond earrings in my right ear. Hopefully getting repierced this weekend. I want to wear this beautiful birthday gift.

**Don't forget to set your clocks ahead before you go to bed on Saturday. I hate that but at least it means Spring is here. YIPEE

American Idol is awful this year isn't it?

Boy Idol is boring this year.
The men....I mean those that aren't genetically women.....I think are horrible.
The women....there are a few that I think have talent but it's not showing.
This season thus far is boring the hell out of me. God there is so much good music from each and every decade and they seem to pick the worst of each decade. And this so called rocker chick - she has to go. She is a cartoon character of a rocker. It's so not real to me.
And what the hell is up with Paula? The chick is one wacko short of Michael Jackson.

I am invited to another baby shower. Ah, Jeez is all I can say. Am I the only one who dislikes attending these things? Is it because I don't have kids? I mean I like kids - I especially love them from age 2 to 14.(then again after 18) But showers are so awful. All the ooohing and aahing over diaper bags and things that make my eyes roll into the back of my head. The dumb ass games - oh how I hate those games. Of course I will be the only person there without children so all the mommies will ignore me. My hubby thinks I should get credit for going to the first baby shower of hers a couple years ago and not have to go to this one. It doesn't work like that sadly. She's having twins this time around and we have to pay for the new clothing and extra items they need for 2 more children.

You know I have a new job where I am paid far less than before and I need a new car amongst a million other things. How about a shower for me? I need new things and I can have a registry too. Not at babies R Us but I am sure that Pottery Barn, Crate and Barrel and William Sonoma have registries and come to think of it most departments stores do as well. I need a kicky new spring rain coat and some new clothes. I've lost weight and all my pants and shorts are too big for this season.
I can do a registry of gifts for me and my home.
I can make my friends bring me gifts that I have chosen so that it takes all the thoughtfulness of gift giving away and is completely and utterly a selfish act for the receiver.
Instead of stupid games we can just drink outselves silly and have a ton of chocolate and food. No one would be permitted to discuss poopy diapers or teething or any mommy chores. We will just be a bunch of fun broads having a good time.

I think I'm on to something here.....

The day after...

Feeling a big sad today.

Maybe 'cause my birthday is over.

Maybe 'cause America is so dumb they voted for Hillary in Ohio and Texas.
Now I knew Texas because well.....you fill in the blank you know why I don't need to say it.
But Ohio? Man I didn't think they were that dumb.
Then again maybe because my allergies are killing me and I'm a year older and I wish I was on a beach somewhere warm!

I got the most gorgeous 2 ct diamond earrings for my birthday yesterday.
Yup, 1 carat per ear. They are beautiful! They are in a "champage" setting.
Very nice. Hubby did good! (as he always does)
The sad thing about something so wonderful you ask? I haven't worn earrings in so damn long that my right ear is closed up. I can not get the earring to go through my right ear. I finally got an old pair of hoops with the thin wire through. I took that out all excited thinking that I would now be able to get my diamond studs in but NO. Still won't work. I assume I will have to have that ear re-pierced. Do they do that shit? I can't believe I finally get a pair of diamond earrings and I can't wear them! Figures though. Something tells me there may be a lesson there for me regarding the wanting of stuff and vanity.

Your thoughts?

Archaic Yellow Pages

Does anyone even use the yellow pages anymore? With Google and Superpages.com I can not imagine why anyone would use them to be honest with you. I know I never even open my phone books when they arrive – they go straight into the recycle bin.

My husband thought it would be a good idea to be listed in the phone book. There were 3 that he thought were necessary. I didn’t agree but since it’s his business I went along. Then the phone books arrived and we opened the books to be sure we were listed under the proper heading. Of course you have to figure with service being the way it is today that 1 of the books had to be incorrect....and it was.

Since I am the person who answers incoming calls into the business I deal with the issue that being in the wrong category can bring.
First off the average person using the phone book/yellow pages is older. They don’t use computers and generally are hard of hearing. (ok that can be a stereotype but it appears that those are the customers who call us) They find us under the heading of bathroom remodeling instead of bathtub reglazing. They call wanting us to remodel and redesign their bathrooms. We don’t do that and when I do tell them what it is we do they get angry. They ask why are you listed under bathroom remodeling then? So I must explain that this was an error that the phone book company made. I generally will get Gramps yelling at me for a few more minutes before he hangs up on me.

There is a fine line between educating someone to your services and pissing them off in this situation. I can sell my little heart out as to why they may need us and sometimes it really can work don’t get me wrong. But more often than not they know what they want and if they wanted my services they would have gone to that heading to begin with. If I push too far they are pissed off and that doesn’t bode well for our company either. So you must walk that tight rope since the phone book made this blunder.

I contacted the phone company to tell them of this error and they said they would have to “investigate this so called error” They would get back to me within 14 business days.
Investigate? I imagine them with their trench coat and magnifying glass combing through phone books. What the hell is there to investigate?

I got a call back today after 22 days (14 days in their world) and they tell me that the heading is “close enough” so there will be no reimbursement for their error. Close enough? She told me that if someone calls and they want their bathroom remodeled then I should just sell them on our services instead. When I told her that this has happened on several occasions and that Gramps gets a bit hostile when I tell him we don’t do what he is looking for. She began to tell me that this was an opportunity therefore I should be thankful and not expect a reimbursement.

Thinking like her for a moment then wouldn’t calling on Pizza Hut to have my General Tso Chicken delivered be the same logic? Pizza Hut could tell me they don’t sell General Tso Chicken but instead tell me about their menu and try to convince me I really needed a pizza and besides, it’s cheaper. But I want General Tso’s Chicken and that is all I’ve been thinking about all day so deliver me some Chicken damn it. It’s all a restaurant that delivers. Close enough right?

Who needs the damn phone book anyway.

I Don't Think So

In the days before GPS...
My hubby and I don’t often fight. There has always been 1 exception to this.....being in the car together. Oh, he can make me so mad when he is driving.
He tells me to be his co-pilot and he hands me the map and then will say, “you’ve got to tell me where to go okay?” I tell him to turn right. He says, “I don’t think so” and continues on his merry way.

I am holding the map and I have the address who do you think is correct? Then after driving aimlessly in circles for 25 minutes he turns around and goes back to where we should have turned right and says, “We should have turned here” as though I never mentioned it.
Oh God, how he frustrates me in a car!

Now having told you this you should also know that he is hopelessly directionally impaired. Oh that is so not an exaggeration. When he used to travel for work I always wondered how the hell he got off a plane in a strange city and ended up where he needed to be on time knowing that he is so bad at directions.  He is a freak about being prompt so I know he was on time but how the hell he got there is anyone's guess including his. I now believe when he did arrive at his destination at all it should be considered another wonder of the world.

Once he called me from Maine. He was there for work. He took a wrong turn. Imagine that will ya? He was on a road he said that was parallel to where he needed to be so he figured he'd get there. I asked how he knew that. A map he snarled. Okay then. (remember this is back in the day of mapquest and maps) He called to tell me that this road was gorgeous he had trees on the left and water on the right and on and on he went.He told me I was right he loved Maine (I sure do!)  I said but if you're not supposed to be on this road why do you continue? Oh, I'll get there no worries. That would make me itchy. I couldn't be late for an appointment with a client and know I'm on the wrong road. He can't be late - EVER so I can't imagine him being so calm about this. But God love him he made it to where he had to be. I just shake my head at that man.

Now hubby is delusional about a lot of things. (for instance, he thinks I’m cute and he thinks he has way more hair than he actually does) But it’s important to note that he isn’t delusional about the fact that he is so directionally impaired. When I suggested he get a GPS when they came on the market he too thought that was a great idea.

Imagine my surprise when one day I get into the car and the woman's voice on the GPS tells him to turn left and he says to her, “I don’t think so” 
He is talking back to this automated woman for heaven's sake! 
For most of that trip, all I keep hearing is the GPS woman say, “recalculating” because he won’t listen to her either. OH MY GOD!

Then a couple of weeks later I get in his car and the GPS woman is now speaking with an Australian accent. I asked him why.
He answers me with a laugh, "because the other bitch was pissing me off".
I ask him if her lovely accent helps him to listen to her directions he responded with, “You’d think so wouldn’t you?” 

Meaning – NO.  Now that made us both laugh out loud.

So now it’s a little less stressful for me when driving with him and with much less arguing.
I always know that we will get wherever we are going in a very unusual way with or without a GPS. I no longer take his not listening to my directions so personally. I mean if he talks back to an inanimate object and argues with her....

In Treatment

I am mezmerized by the HBO drama In Treatment.

I tivo it and sometimes want to watch the same episode immediately again after it just finished. I had a mini-marathon this weekend.

I think Gabriel Brynes is so riveting. His face can say so much in this 25-30 minute show that I can't take my eyes off him. I don't believe I have ever witnessed such a range of emotions from an actors face with so little words being used. I can't say enough about this show and all the actors. I like them all but Alex, played by Blair Underwood, has really grown on me. Something is boiling under that military controled surface that I think when it blows it will be ugly or wonderful. No gray area there - ya just know it will be BIG when he stops holding back.

If you haven't watched this show I really hope you can watch it On Demand or in repeats. But watch from the beginning to really get the full grip of the show.

It's shows a therapist who we watch having sessions with 5 patients. Each patient is a different day of course at 9:30pm. Every Monday Gabriel sees Laura, Tuesday his patient is Alex....you get the idea. Same patient same day....just like in real life.

I think I know where it's going with Laura, this Angelina Jolie look alike with the same smoldering sexuality, but it will be interesting to see how this is tied up for the season. I think Gabriels character is going to cross the line with this chick!

If you enjoy action movies vs. dialogue then this isn't for you. If you enjoy the movie more than the book then this isn't for you. If you hate chick flicks because there is "too much talking" and not enough car chases then this isn't for you.
This programming is smart, dynamic, emotional, raw, adult, and riveting television.
(now that isn't a phrase you hear every day)

But if you think that a really good movie is American Pie or Charlie's Angels then this isn't for you! But if you want to give it a shot it's on HBO every night at 9:30pm EST.

Now if I could only get HBO to pay me for this advertising I would REALLY LOVE THE SHOW!

As the Cable Company turns......

Okay you may have seen the comment from Comcast regarding my post from yesterday.
If you have not they are basically saying to me that they are sorry for my experience but if I would like to email him and contact him he will discuss with me.

Mmmm.....let me see if I understand. I was inconvenienced. I called customer service looking for service and got none. Now you are asking me to stop what I am doing to contact you so you can understand the issue better? How much more do you need to know than what is written?

I always thought since I was inconvenienced and lost many hours of work over many weeks they may want to reach out to me to show that they really are concerned about losing a customer. Obviously not.

Just another window into what Comcast calls service.

COMCAST SUCKS.

Once again the level of customer service I receive is staggering.


Every week I have to call my ISP provider, Comcast, to tell them that I do not have service. Each week they apologize like that is going to make me feel better. They do not listen to the issue they assume they know the issue, which is never the real issue. Aaargh.
For the past 4 weeks I have had to make a call to them at the very least 1 time per week.
The outages vary from week to week. Sometimes only an hour, many more times for several hours like Thursday (5.25 hours today)


Yesterday when I called they told me that they don’t show that I have ever called or had a service technician out to my home since 1999. I never had Comcast until 2000. I got a lecture on how I must call each and every time there is a problem.
Oh my God was all I could think of at that moment because I was so livid.
I asked the person on the phone to please hold as I went to my file cabinet and pulled out the technician work order that I had to sign on January 29th.


I took a deep breath so I could be a bit calmer and then picked up the phone and told the person from Comcast that I was holding the work order from the last week of January. It not only involved a phone call but a visit from a tech from said phone call.
Can you even imagine her response to me? She said, “Oh” Let me repeat that.
She said, “Oh.” She said it like she knew this all along and that she assumed that I wasn’t going to be smart enough to know when they were here last or when my last call was. (btw the last call was on February 11th)


Still biting down hard enough on my tongue so I do not say something I will regret yet just so I do not produce blood, I asked for some financial reimbursement on my bill since I have had so many outages of late. She stated that “we don’t like to do that.” Once again I am completely and utterly shocked at these words. As I type this I am laughing at her balls to even say that to a customer. Have to give her credit for the balls I must admit.
Honestly looking back on this I don’t know why I was shocked there is no longer service anywhere so why does this continue to surprise me? I am hopelessly delusional in my belief that someday I will actually receive any service when I call customer service.


I told this Nitwit that I don’t like to have to ask for reimbursement either and I would much prefer to have service than to have to make this request. (Actually I would rather have a sharp stick in the eye than to have to deal with her but I did not share that lovely sentiment)
I then asked if I could please speak to a supervisor when suddenly she turned into an angel and could find it in her cold heart to give me $20.00 off my bill.


Nitwit continues to say things that about made my head explode. She said to me that since it was early morning (8:45am) maybe I could do something else than PLAY in email or online and when I get back to the computer it may be up and running by then.
At this point my tongue was bleeding. I took a deep breath and with literally everything I could muster to be professional I told this nitwit that I work from home so I am neither playing in email or online. My customers come to me via email and I must respond quickly. I can not retrieve our website and I am working with the designer of said site at 11:00am. This is costing me money. She then had the balls to tell me to upgrade my service to the professional service if this was used for business purposes. I asked what that would do for me and she said she was not sure but she would transfer me.


I personally think that Nitwit just couldn’t get me off the phone fast enough.
So she passed me over to Numb Nuts.


Numb Nuts tells me that the only difference between the service that I have now and what a professional package could give me is that the technicians COULD come out faster to service me if I have an outage.
I asked what the difference in price would be and he tells me that it goes from $46/month to $95/month. I ask if this gives me new cables, new equipment or anything that I don’t currently have in place that would increase reliability and speed and he said, “ No, just that a tech will – and here is the clincher – PROBABLY come out there sooner.” PROBABLY I asked? If they are in your area they will PROBABLY come the same day. He kept saying PROBABLY. So, basically as I see it I have to PAY $50 more a month in hopes that he PROBABLY will show up and PROBABLY be in my area and PROBABLY know what the problem is. It is all a big gamble and I am not a gambler.
I told Numb Nuts that this just doesn’t sound like a value to me so I would have to pass. And then Numb Nuts says something astounding, “yea you might as well stay where you are....sorry”
Great sales pitch Numb Nuts. I bet you are swimming in commissions.


So I orders FIOS and since I get a 30 day free trial I might as well give it a go and keep the Comcast until my 30 days are up to see if it is worth it. How can it be worse? I am meeting a friend tonight for drinks and I think she mentioned awhile back that she was frustrated with Comcast so she was going to FIOS. I may have to pick her brain to see if it is good, bad or just plain indifferent like Comcast.
Right now carrier pigeon would be better than Comcast!

Random Thoughts

*I watched American Idol last night and the only thing that kept standing out to me was how androgynous the American Male has become. I think we have just gone over the line of metrosexual here. Not a lot of testoterone in the bunch.

*Obama won Wisconsin and Hawaii. 'Nuff said.

*Is there anything more disturbing than the Iraqi Vet who is charged with raping a 3 month old baby? The baby sustained brain damage, 17 broken bones and is undergoing therapy. Which I assume means physical therapy since the baby is so young. Jeez. There are no words for this. He says he was drunk and was taking pain killers. C'mon. (insert my mantra here!)

*We are still doing our taxes....thank God there is a deadline because it's beginning to feel as though we may NEVER get done.

*Why do people ask me when they call the business if we are any good? And will the final product look nice? Would you ask the chef at a resturant if he was any good? Would you ask a school teacher if she was any good? Would you ask your plumber if he was any good? And if you did would you expect any of them to say, "hell no we suck but we'll take your money if you're foolish enough to hand it over!" (insert my mantra here!)

*Have you noticed how much weight Oprah has gained since the break down of her thyroid? I feel badly for her. The only good thing about that is that she puts a face to this constant struggle that everyone thinks once you get medication for you'll just drop pounds. If only it were that easy. Wish she would do a show on the topic and not tell her audience that if you hold in your voice you'll get hypothryoidism or hyperthryoidism. That show was harmful to everyone and ridiculous at best.

*The people who live across the street from me are a Jerry Springer show each and every day for me out my office window. A woman lives there with her husband AND her boyfriend. Her kids from both live there as well. (her mom lives there too w/her boyfriend.) There a couple of families who live there and it's like a car wreck outside my office window. I know I shouldn't stare but I can't help it.

*I called a travel agent for some rates or packages to Las Vegas. I told the agent which hotels I would prefer to stay at. She never asked me if I had a budget or an amount I didn't wish to go over. She just started off telling me that the hotels I had choosen were too expensive and kept telling me about packages and rates at cheap hotels that I wouldn't even want to stay in. When I said no I want rates for XYZ she told me again that they were really expensive. I told her that I still wanted to know and that if that is what I want I should make the decision if they are too much money for me. She told me a few rates and then said that she wouldn't recommend them because there really are cheaper ones not much further away. They make a commission so why would she do this? I had a burning desire to ask to speak to the owner but I did not. I said okay and hung up. I'll do the research myself. Aren't they suppose to SELL travel? And isn't the majority of selling listening to what your client really wants and giving him that and perhaps more?
(insert my mantra here!)

Spring Training and My List

Okay the ole arm is able to really move of late. I guess my physical therapist isn't just torturing me. I can now get my right arm ALMOST parallel to my ear.
Now if only my legs could do that. (sick, sick, sick but who you kidding you thought that too)

I am so excited. It's warm out today, my allergies are in full bloom, my tulips are showing their lovely leaves and that means only 1 thing. Spring Training Baby.
God how I love this time of year. I can't wait until the super bowl is over and then I know it's almost here. I am so excited about this new year, new manager, new players. Oh how I love my boys of summer! I bleed pinstripes baby!!

My hubby and I had some friends over for drinks. 3 couples. Somehow we got to talking about his "list". Remember that episode of Friends when Ross had his list laminated? Like he was ever going to meet Isabella Rossellini.
My husband's is lamininated too... in his mind.....he cracks me up.
The normal couple played along with all of this and we all were laughing a good deal. But one of the females thought it was awful that her spouse would even think about having a list let alone have one. When we pointed out that he really doesn't have an actual list written down or laminated it didn't stop her. She actually got mad. She wanted the topic changed because it was pissing her off so much that her face was turning red. Oh please, grow up is what I wanted to shout AND we're all just joking around. Apparently this idea was not funny or worthy of a joke to her.
It's not like we run in the same circles and my hubby will run into Selma at the Piggly Wiggly. Yep when I am moping the floor there is such a good chance thatGeorge Clooney may just be outside my front door with limo to take me away from this drudgery...I hear he likes the smell of lemon pledge.

I made the mistake of saying (before her face turned red) that if Selma Hayek were to bump into him and she just had to have my little pot bellied stallion I would have to say to him, "honey go for it and enjoy"
After I stated that I would "let him go for it" this young blonde thing next to me about died. She shrieked, "how could you? She went literally ape shit at this point. She said she wouldn't even speak to her husband if he even told her he looked at other women let alone had a list."

Okay that's a bit much to me but I didn't share that thought with her. I instead said that while we and Selma and for that matter George don't hang out in the same circles the chances are slim to none that it would happen. This isn't real, this will never happen and we are all just having a good laugh and are joking around. The other couple sat there with their mouths open like they too couldn't believe this was happening. Wow this young thing needs a lesson in reality.....or at the very least get a sense of humor. I mean really Selma would never meet hubby unless she likes to go fishing and George probably won't get the chance to meet me unless he stops by Lowe's or the growcery store....but hey it's just fun to play....just like dreaming of winning the lottery. People need to lighten up. Get a sense of humor and for God's sake if you honestly think your husband will never notice another woman ever again then you need to get your head out of your ass.
Hmmm....is that too harsh?

Valentine's Day

Remember when VD was so much fun? I couldn't wait to read all my Valentines. I remember the night before writing them all out. I so hoped that cute boy would send me a special Valentine. I loved all the ones with glitter. Oh yes, I was a glitter foo-foo girly girl back then. Hmm....what the hell happened to that girl?

I had a cookie company 13 years ago or more. Valentines Day meant 24 hours of work. Literally. I am not exaggerating. We would start work on the 13th of February at 4:30a.m. and work until 6p.m. on the 14th. It was grueling. We used to call it by the company name(which will remain nameless) "Cookie XYZ tired" That meant dog ass tired, loopy tired, delirious tired. All of the above.

To this day my husband and I will refer to being tired and ask, "but are you Cookie XYZ tired?" Hell no....so you can go on.

Because of all that work and all that craziness to give people's loved one cookie bouquets or baskets or mugs we no longer really like this holiday. Even out of the buisness for 13 + years we still feel this is not a holiday for us.

Last month I made him promise not to get me anything for this holiday. I told him this- "besides honey it's so close to my birthday and that is my favorite holiday so save it all for then."

Now before I hear all the sigh's and aww's like we are pathetic for not celebrating this hallmark holiday we are going out to dinner tonight. But to be honest it's more about the convenience of neither of us cooking than it is Valentine's day.

Besides in 3 weeks I expect big beautiful shiney and sparkly things!

The Potomac Primaries

YIPEE !!!!!!!!!!

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

Okay I made it home last night from the frigid north and Dad’s 80th celebration.

The Good:
It was sunny and 4 degrees yesterday when we left! Woo –hoo!!!
Satellite radio in the rent a car so one could listen to comics and laugh on the dreadful drive.
My Dad was sincerely gleeful and thankful for the party and had a helluva good time.
(hangover to prove it)
Hubby and I saw some friends and family that were fun to see and party with.
The food at the party was superb!

The Bad:
It was sunny and 4 degrees yesterday when we left
It was snowing and blowing and frigid all weekend.
It was 50-60 mile an hour winds and that made it -12 to -15 degrees outside on the day of the party.
The snow was blowing so hard you couldn’t see and the wind made it difficult to walk.
The hole in my tongue is from biting it so much around family and other assorted numb nuts.
The hotel bed.
'nuff said.

The Ugly:
It was sunny and 4 degrees yesterday when we left and that was the high the whole time we were there!!!!!
There was a foot of snow that fell and another 6-12 on it’s way when we left.
One sister did not show up for her father’s 80th birthday. There are no excuses for that.
The smell of the car with 50 garlic and butter chicken wings that my husband insist he had to buy from this local bar to bring back home. Oh it was bad. The poor folks who rent that car next.

Overall not too bad of a trip...getting started was a hoot.
My husband was making all kinds of goofy mistakes when we were trying to leave our home. We drove around our development for 45 minutes before we could truly leave. The first time we got to the traffic light to turn on to the highway he says he left his wallet on the dresser....so back we go. Then we get to the last intersection before we leave the development and I ask, did you remember to get the E-Z pass out of the car? He answers so proudly, “I sure did and he removes it out of his sweatshirt pocket as he does a “ta-da”. I look at what he is holding and laugh and say, “honey that is the garage door opener.” Back we go.....again.
I am laughing hysterically at this point because he was so damn proud that he remembered without me having to tell him. C’mon now you all know that’s funny. So as we pull away from our house I say, “Are we really ready this time?” He says we sure are and we try this again. Now leaving our development we should turn left....he turns right. I say while laughing my ass off, “Where are we going?” He says angrily, “Margaret where the hell you think we’re going?” I am laughing so hard because to me this is funny but I am also just a bit scared like my stud muffin is perhaps getting Alzheimer’s? I say, "Hon, we are headed toward DC and we are going the wrong way." To which he responds with a few obscenities and does yet another u-turn and he says to me, “My God my head is up my ass today....and you don’t need to comment any further on that.” I just laughed. No need to abuse the old coot.

Seeing my father have so much fun and be so damn happy was worth all the bullshit and the family crap. I mean really, he’s 80, how many more times will I see him that happy? How many more times will I even get to spend that much time with him? He can truly be a pain in the arse but he means well most of the time. I have to try and remember that.
A few others there....not so much.

I’m home now at one with my stuff and my great bed and where the cold is relative. Today it is 28 degrees....that would have been a heat wave where I was so I am doubly glad to be home. It’s true, there is no place like home.

My Trip Home

I am going to my hometown this weekend. I am dreading it. Most of my friends say they are excited to go home to visit family. Me, I get nauseous just thinking about the dreaded trip. 7 hour drive in what is normally 4 seasons while driving. (no airline flies directly there so it’s quicker to drive) It will be cold, it will be snowing and it will be miserable. And not because of the weather.

When I was 7 or 8 I remember so clearly (I don't remember much clearly these days so that always surprises me) knowing that I would move and get out of this city.
I was laying on the grass with my younger sister looking at the clouds. I distinctly remember saying to her that I was going to live somewhere else. I remember her asking me where and I told her I didn't know but I was not going to be a grown up and live there. I didn't even know why I didn't want to live there exactly but yet I knew I wouldn't be here and that I didn’t “fit in” here.

It's hard to explain that feeling I had that day. I remember it so vividly yet I can't remember what I had for breakfast yesterday. I always wanted "more". I wanted travel in my life and to experience all kinds of people and books and ideas. I didn’t know where I would get them but I knew it wasn’t there even at 7....which still surprises the hell out of me.

Now it was an okay place to grow up I guess. There wasn't really any culture per se. There was no diversity, which I think is horrible for children to not be exposed to others who are unlike them. But my parents were good enough to realize that moving us to the 'burbs for better schools would be good for their girls. That saved me. Had I not gone to a school with such an open minded curriculum with such a forward thinking school district at that time, I not only would have been bored out of my mind but I would have gotten into trouble I am sure out of pure boredom. This school opened my mind, encouraged my love of books and showed me new worlds which are so important when your world is so small. The school at the time had the highest test scores in the state and had the highest majority who went on to college. I am blessed and thankful that we moved those 15 miles away from the city core.

My hometown city is the same today as it was when I was a kid. To some that is nice, to me it is sad. Doesn't everyone need to grow in some form or another? I am not saying it needs to be NYC, San Francisco or even Chicago I am just saying that perhaps doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is rather pathetic.

The city is 1/2 the size it was when I was growing up. It is a blue collar town. It was an industrial city where you worked at GE or Hammermill paper and got a gold watch when you retired. Factories galore. To get a job that was not in a factory you got an education and then you left to secure work. Or you were in the "trades" and in a union.(like my dad) and you stayed.

As the factories closed nothing came to replace them except minimum wage service jobs. So many people have lost jobs but without a college education what could they do? The factories were closing and the jobs remaining were low paying and without insurance etc. Some moved, most stayed out of fear of the unknown. Usually those with some type of training or education moved to put food on the table.

The close proximity to Canada and other large cities brought in the shoppers to save on there being no sales tax so that was a boom to the chain restaurants and malls off the interstate. The beaches on the great lake where the city lay provided for tourism dollars in the summer to spend at the malls and the chain restaurants. Slowly the only people there were the tourists and the old people left behind or those that didn't go to college who are working at one of the remaining factories or service industry jobs. Those that stayed after college generally stayed for family reasons.

The downtown is boarded up. People don't make much money so anything new is generally seen as being too expensive and goes out of business quickly. (Starbucks, fine dining restaurants) They complain constantly. They complain about the lack of jobs, the deteriorating buildings and city but do nothing different. Their motto, "it's worked for us for the last 50 yrs doing it this way, why change?"
The same people are on the city council with the same ideas and archaic thinking. Anyone with a new idea is ridiculed until they leave office. The average income is what the rest of America would consider poverty. The general population is neither well traveled or well read. They think going to the other side of the city in 15 minutes is a big deal and another world and they just don’t ever do it.

Their world has become very small and they fear anything or anyone who is different or new. I believe that fear breeds ignorance and I see it every time I go home.
Races are separated to different parts of town like the 1950's. There is high crime, low test scores, high teen pregnancy and low paying jobs. Yet housing has kept up with the national average which I find remarkable.

So having just stated only a couple of the issues of my hometown you can probably see why every one there is negative. I wonder if I had stayed would I have become that negative too? Anyone who makes something of themselves is "high falutin'"
They wait for those who attain any measure, no matter how small, of success to fail and insist it will happen instead of being happy for them. Everything, everyone and every day is a negative experience that you will see from a family member, a store clerk, a waitress, or even a friend who stayed behind. It's snowing but there is a rainbow - they don't see the rainbow and the sun shine, they only bitch about the snow.
Instead they say, “What rainbow...haven’t you ever seen a rainbow before?:
(That is a true story that happened last year when I was home)
The negativity feels heavy and depressing and I can't wait to leave to shake it off.

Those who live there think this town is a "good place to raise your kids" You'll hear that all the time and see it in the newspaper and on their local news.
When I heard that at a family picnic I about died. Hello? The worst school test scores in the country, no culture, no diversity, a large drug culture. Gangs, and no hope for the younger generation. How the hell can that be a good place to raise your children?

But I am going back to my hometown because my father will be 80 this weekend and he deserves a party. We will all be home to celebrate. I will try desperately to ignore the negative comments and there will be many.....from my father as well. I hope that after 2 1/2 days there I can come home and be thankful for my life, my hubby and the fact that I got to pay my way through college and listened to that inner voice when I was 7 and got the hell out of dodge!

YES WE CAN

I have never been more inspired in my whole adult life!!

Please listen carefully.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/01/26/barack-obamas-south-caro_n_83417.html

Now that the arm is getting better...

I have been in physical therapy for 2 months. I am doing so much better since they fired my sadistic therapist who bruised my arms and set me back 1 full month of recovery. Apparently, quite a few folks complained and when I did I guess it was the last straw for them. I felt bad for a minute and then I snapped out of it. What she was doing to me could have caused me so much more damage. Hopefully she is not tormenting others at a new place!

For the first 2 weeks of my recovery, I don't remember a lot. I was living in a Percocet fog.
I have had 4 back surgeries and this was much more difficult and painful.
I do remember the pain and I really remember laughing a helluva lot with my husband.
Hard to imagine laughing so much when you are in so much pain but my husband will do that to me as well as the drugs.

My right arm was in a stabilizing sling for 4 weeks 24/7. Think sling but held at 8 inches away from your body.  Because of this sling, I could not pull my pants up or down completely by myself.  Not what a grown woman wants to have to deal with. 

The first day I had to go to the bathroom I got my sweat pants down a bit on the left side but the right was impossible and I was struggling. Rick asked if I needed help and I thought about my dignity but then thought, "hmm....how much dignity will I have if I pee my pants anyway?"  So of course I said sure! 

He came to the bathroom and thinking he is helping me so much he pulled my sweats and panties down to the floor and I burst out laughing. 

I asked him what the hell he was doing and he responded with, "well you don't want to pee on them do you?"  HUH? 

I explained that women do not drop their drawers to the floor but stop somewhere around the knee area. That cracked him up for some reason.
When I was finished I couldn't get my pants up all the way by myself so there I was with said pants and panties on my thighs. I am holding them up by keeping my legs apart and trying to wash my hands at the same time. I continue to try to pull up my pants but it's not working.  I need my right arm because my left arm is too damn short and I can not reach around damn it.

I had to walk out of the bathroom with pants not even up far enough to cover my butt and ask for help. Dignity completely out the window at this point!  He did pull them up but something wasn't right. I stood in the hall wiggling and adjusting as much as I could with one hand but they just didn't feel right. I went into the kitchen where my wonderful hubby was preparing dinner and he asked me why I was wiggling. Thanks to the Percocet fog I couldn't stop laughing but when I did I told him that my panties were literally in a twist. That made us laugh some more. Thankfully he came over to straighten them out. After several weeks of this dance, we realized that he is much better at taking off my panties than he is putting them on.  His answer to this problem I was having while in this sling thing was to not wear any underwear anymore.

By week 4 I was so tired of wearing a baseball cap because of being unable to do my hair.
I only have one arm and that makes holding a blow dryer and brush a bit difficult. My hair looked horrific. I do not have wash and wear hair. Thankfully I showered daily with my hubby so he was washing my hair. (yea I milked that one) I have a short layered style that needs to be blown dry with product to have any body at all. I had to go to the dr.'s for a follow up and I begged my husband to help me blow dry my hair. Being the ever wonderful man he is he says he'll try. 

In a matter of a minute or less, he has hit me in the head with the blow dryer a few times. When I asked him to move the heat in the direction of the round brush he blew it into my eye and I swear he burned my retina. Then he got the round brush stuck in my hair.
He let go of the brush and it was still attached to my head and he said, "oh oh"
"You know  Rick it might be safer to just turn off the dryer, get the brush out of my head without tearing out all my hair and leaving me bald.  I'll just wear my baseball cap again to the doctors."
His response? I told you to just wear a cap no one really cares! 
Yes but I do! I was feeling so frumpy I just wanted my hair done and some help with looking presentable in public. It was so frustrating for me.

I really did not want to eat a thing for that first month.
I slept in a chair an hour here an hour there.
But my husband was running around making food like a family of 10 lived here.
There are 2 of us. Only 1 eating anything more than soup. 

He is nuts like this.  
He reminds me of every old Italian aunt, mother, and grandmother I have ever known or had in my life.  When I said to him that I only wanted some soup. He made a vat of delicious homemade soup. He is such a great soup maker. Yes, I said a VAT.
We could have feed the block. He told me much later after I was not in withering pain and that fun swirling percocet fog that he was feeling helpless and he didn't know what to do for me other than make me food and hover over me. Oh and hover he did. My God if I moved in the chair and made any type of noise at all he would fly across the room and say, "Can I do something for you? Are you okay? Do you need anything? Are you hungry?"

Now I know that sounds lovely and wonderful. And I am so grateful for his care and attention.  I love him for it all really I do. But I have to admit it became a bit annoying as hell too.  I knew his heart was in the right place but I would open my eyes and there he was standing over me. It just became another joke for us to laugh at. I called him my nonna (grandma in Italian) We worked out a plan and if he was hovering I was to say something to him. When I would say something about his hovering he would laugh and say, "my God I am aren't I?"   He would say that with such sincere shock in his voice and on his face so that too made me howl. 

The funniest to me was my bra. I wasn't allowed to wear a bra my first 4 weeks.
That is fine when you're home but I had to go to physical therapy and I didn't want to knock an eye out. I could have hurt people. So the therapist told me how to put it on so that I wasn't moving my arm in a way I shouldn't move it. I needed a helluva lot of help with the bra. He was so bad at this as well. This is a man who can remove a bra with a snap of his two fingers and viola it's off.  Putting it on was as difficult for him as blow drying my hair.
After a couple of weeks when he got the hang of it he made it a fondling session.
When I asked that he just please put the bra on me and not fondle my breasts he told me that he was doing it his way and he'd smile. I was trapped. I couldn't move my arm. He was making me angry yet he made me laugh too.  He's frustratingly charming if that makes sense. He kept telling me that as my caregiver he deserved to cop a feel when he put on my bra. Honestly, men are idiots aren't they?

There is still a lot of limitations on me but for the most part, I am back to normal.  I still can't reach the inside the microwave above my stove with my right arm but I'm pretty damn close. And Thank God I can pull up my own pants, blow dry my hair and put on my own bra.....although the last one he stills asks if he can help me with.

I am so glad we have the same sense of humor and laughed through all of this. He has been such a great sport and I know I am going to owe him big time. To be honest I don't think I'd be as good a caregiver as he was to me. I hope I never find out because that would mean I'd have to see him in pain and I know that would be tough to deal with for me.


Here's to Health and Wealth in 2008!

Don't Assume How I am voting because I'm......

I am a feminist. I know that in our society today a feminist is a 4 letter word; however I grew up in a time when it was empowering. I continue to hear from the media that because I am a feminist and a white female I must be voting for Hillary Clinton. I am more than just my gender and my race.

I remember in a high school logic class we had to really learn about the candidates.
Not sound bites, but really read and educate our selves on ALL the candidates.
Teams were chosen for us. (I was on team McGovern.) We had to do our homework on ALL candidates and then debate. To me it was exciting and I was so jealous of the 12th graders who were 18 and who could vote while I was only 17.
I had such pride when I turned 18 to register as an independent. As time went on I became a democrat. Today I am back to being an independent and disillusioned as most of the country is in one form or another.
I am proud to say that I have never missed an election.
Some years I have chosen my leader by the lesser of two evils. It appears I may be doing the same again here real soon.

I have nieces who have had a very difficult life and I have always told them that what has happened to them does not make them who they are, but how they deal with the things that happen to them does make them who they are and will become.
This really can be applied to what is going on today in the election in so many ways.

Which all brings me back full circle to Hillary. When she feels trapped in a corner or someone one "upping" here the way she behaves speaks volumes to me and my God I wish more would pay attention to that.
When Barack was ahead, she cried and pulled out Bill. He was on all the talk shows speaking inaccuracies and despicable things about all their opponents. Not discussing Hillary’s plans or vision except in saying it was experience. Experience in what?
Not one candidate has ever been president before and none of you can say that any of the experience leading up to this is even remotely close to being the President of the free world. (And why isn’t this brought up for Guiliani? He was only a mayor… because Hillary isn’t debating him that is why!)

How is she change? Let’s see we’ve had a White House of Bush, Clinton, Bush, and possibly Clinton? No thank you. I want real change.
We are hated more than ever around the world. This behavior of hers will continue to raise it’s ugly head and do we really need more of the same hatred with her “W” like smirk, her too similar holier than thou “W”attitude? If she behaves in this manner now with her “peers” how will she be when sitting across from a country that doesn’t agree with her?
OMG wake up America!

Don’t listen to the sound bites – read – educate yourself. Do not vote because of gender, race, religion or hair. Vote on their record, their ideas of change, and for God’s sake not because someone’s husband, father, or wife was a good leader. I would not want to be judged by my father or my husband. I am my own person. So they too should stand on their own. It rather reminds me of high school. The “mean girl” is popular and her boyfriend, the high school football star who has graduated comes back to help her put down those that she doesn’t like and continue the “high school game” of bullying in one form or another.

So please don’t tell me because I am a woman I am voting for Hillary. Don’t assume I vote with my anatomy. Please don’t assume I am apathetic because I am fully disgusted with America of late and American’s short attention spans and please don’t assume because I voted for Bill Clinton his wife gets a free pass. What we really have to be afraid of is what my republican co-worker said to me a couple of days ago. You guys can keep voting for Hillary, we’ll then win for sure. Sadly that reality seems to be becoming too true for me.

Feminism is not a dirty word

I have always considered myself a feminist. I do not think that is a bad word like most men and women do today.
In the 70’s there were so many women to admire and look up to who were forging this fight for me. While I looked at most as having radical views I also realized that without those radical views of the time and their hard push for change I wouldn’t have had the career or most of the opportunities that have defined my life. The best way I can describe my take on this is a friend who tells me she is a vegetarian but she eats fish all the time and bacon once in a while. Okay in the real world that is not the definition of a vegetarian. For me it’s been a bit of the same. I did not want to “burn” my bra per se because God knows I needed it even in the 70’s. However the reason for the burning I understood very well and agreed with in theory. I know it’s the same for my vegetarian friend.

When I was growing up I remember absolutely loving the television show THAT GIRL with Marlo Thomas. I wanted to be her. At that time it was such a radical thing to see on television - A young woman forging ahead with her dreams independent from her parents or a husband. She lived alone as a choice instead of choosing marriage. All the while she loved clothes and being feminine. Having nice clothes and pretty highlights didn’t diminish her brain, her strength, her beliefs, her conviction to her career or her fight for equality that would arise on a daily basis.
These women of the 70’s with their hard work and dedication to the cause gave me a career like any man had a choice to have and while today I believe we deserve the same pay and opportunities of a man yet it sadly is still not equal. It still isn’t equal on so many levels and today’s young women don’t do anything to further the cause but seem to be good at having role models that hurt the cause....but I digress.

Now having said all of that you would think I would be above looking at a woman and how she dresses. But I am not. I am a feminist who likes a good pair of shoes and personal appearance does mean something to me. I do not think that she should be treated differently because of her dress but that her dress should not take away from what she is saying and doing.

In certain situations I believe that how you are dressing speaks volumes not only about you but the level of respect you have for yourself as well as those you are working with and who are around you. Like a young man wearing his pants below his arse to school, church or a funeral. I've seen that. It's disrespectful on so many levels and it causes you to not see the young man but the clothing he wears. I am not saying that as a woman you have to wear makeup and heels all the time. But my God make an effort to look the best you can with what you have to work with so you are heard not just seen. And that brings me to Hillary.

Same pant suit, different color, different day. For heaven’s sake Janet Reno dressed better than Hillary. The men in both parties are changing it up but not our Hillary. Guiliani even got a makeover before hitting the campaign trail and removed his comb over. Edwards, MCain, Obama you’ll see in jeans, nice pants and a shirt, a suit, casual shirt and tie without jacket. They change it up. Hillary needs help in this area and I would gladly offer my help and do it for free. My God she has the resources.

I have read about her pant suit issue in the Washington Post, Huffington Post, even magazines in my doctors office. I have been at cocktail parties where the only thing about Hillary that is mentioned is the way she dresses. People are making jokes about her pant suits instead of talking about her position on the war or health care. They didn't write about Prime Minister Thatcher that way.
While I do not intend to vote for Ms. Clinton I still think we need to hear her voice not her clothes. Am I contributing to it? Maybe, but I want to help her be heard not made fun of.

C’mon Hillary I don’t live that far from Georgetown so when you’re in town let’s go shopping. I’ll buy lunch and we’ll have a great day of discussing the issues while buying a nice skirt and a great pair of comfortable campaign boots or shoes. I know you have it in you!!

I hate people....

It’s no wonder that everyone fusses over my husbands company's great customer service...Honestly, EVERYBODY SUCKS!
That will be my new 2008 Mantra – Everybody Sucks.

We have not had heat since yesterday. Last night they were here until 10:30p trying to fix the HVAC. Shawn, our service technician said he did not have the last part necessary. He said he’d call by 10am this morning and gave us his cell phone number to call him in case we didn't hear from him. No surprise - No call. I called the office and the young woman said they were looking for this part. (where the hell are you looking?)and she would call me back in 3 minutes to let me know what was going on.
1½ hours later I call the office again. I am freezing. It is 48 degrees in here and 11 degrees outside. They tell me they may have to order it – oh sure let’s wait another week for a part and they will find this husband and wife frozen together like a popsicle.

I tell him that is unacceptable and that if I do not hear from someone by noon today letting me know if you have a part on another truck as you stated I will assume you have not “found” the part and I will have to call another company. We really can not go another day without heat. (let alone what this does for our pipes etc)

Okay so the guy on the phone tells me that, “hey they found one” hmmm.....just like that while you’re talking to me? Yea, he’ll be there between 1 -4pm.
I said okay I will wait until 4p but if I do not hear from someone by 4pm either by phone or in person I have to go elsewhere because I am not paying for another “emergency call” after hours. That got him all pissy with me and he told me that if I couldn’t trust this company then maybe I should go elsewhere. WTF kind of comment is that to make to a customer?
Well let me tell you the nice hat then came off. I went ballistic on his ass. (we even have a service agreement with this company) We’ll see if someone shows up. I have my doubts.

I am so not in a good mood. Too cold to even sleep last night – let alone the fact that I am in so much damn shoulder/arm pain right now.
I HATE PEOPLE...oh wait that was my mantra from 2007.
EVERYBODY SUCKS!!

Time sure flies when you're having fun

Okay so I wasn't really having any fun the last 2 months.
This surgery turned into a lot more than just a torn rotator cuff.

I got a lot of emails and phone calls asking why I wasn't updating my blog. Okay folks why not comment on the blog then? Just curious.....sorry I digress.

Once they got in my shoulder they also found a SLAP Labrum tear. This one is the killer.
I wore a stabilizing sling for 24/7 for 4 weeks. Only time it could come off was to shower. I had to even sleep in it - if you call sitting in a chair sleeping.

I have a sadistic physical therapist and I am not exaggerating. I understand her job is to get me well and to have full range of motion and not get frozen shoulder. But she likes to hurt me for no apparent reason. Week 5 of PT I actually woke up with movement and hardly any pain. It was like a light went off and I was thrilled. My home exercises no longer hurt. While I was only at 50% range of motion it was better than 5 weeks prior so I saw light at the end of the tunnel - finally.
There is one particular exercise she does to me when I am flat on my back on the table and it makes tears come to my eyes instantly. It's the labrum here we're working on and she tells me this particular movement will be the last thing I recover. She pushes my arm back and I am to tell her when it hurts and she then is to go a little bit more. But she doesn't go "a little bit more" She goes so much more I am moving all over the table and instantly cry, it's like I can't control the tears they just fall. I ask her to stop and she says no. I have to do everything in my power not to hit this woman or swear at her. You have no idea. But while I believe she is doing this to me on purpose and I don't think it's protocol I go along like a sheep and think she must be right she's the doctor of physical therapy.
(which she brags about all the time - BFD)

Then the Friday before Xmas she was off.....I had another therapist. It was heaven. This woman did the same exercises but I did not leave there in need of a percocet drip for the next 24 hrs. She did that same exercise I mention above and when it hurt she went a tad bit more and held it for 30 seconds and then let it go. NO BIG PAIN - NO CRYING - NO TORTURE. I asked her about it and she tells me you shouldn't go to that type of pain because it will not be beneficial for you. HALLELUJAH!!!!!!

The following week after Xmas I had my sadistic therapist again and I asked if we could talk about this pain she inflicts on me. She rolled her eyes and said to suck it up if I don't want frozen shoulder. She did an evaluation that day for the Dr.'s report and we didn't do any exercises that day. But at the end of the evaluation she did dig her 10 fingers into my arm/shoulder so hard and when I yelped "what are you doing?" She tells me she was checking to see if this was XYZ or ABC. I said where the hell did that come from? She just rolls her eyes again at me and walks away. Session over.

By that afternoon i was in so much pain i could no longer do all the things I had progressed to doing....like typing....holding a cup of coffee....moving. Now normally I would exercise at home on the days of no therapy. I was in so much pain it was like the 1st week. I was eating percocets like Pez and not getting much relief. 5 days of mind numbing pain. When i went back to PT yesterday I asked the PT aides about this. The one whom I have bonded with tried every so delicately without incriminating herself that this therapist has had this issue arise before and if I would like to change I should ask the lead therapist...her boss.

Do you know how difficult that will be? Man, I hate those situations. The place is small it's not like I won't see her again. I am seeing my Dr. on Wednesday so I am going to start with him. Then I will go to her boss if necessary. I am hoping he will change the therapist for me since his practice owns the therapy center as well. All I know is that I am having an enormous set back and now my left arm is in pain. She tells me its tendinitis from over use to make up for my right arm being inactive. I don't know what to believe anymore.

So moral of this story.....do not fall off an empty 5 gallon bucket.....for that matter don't do any physical labor. Hire big strong men to do your work while you drink a glass of wine and watch them!! Less painful and it's nice on the eyes.

I'll fill you in on my great caregiver later.....he was great!
Happy New Year.

Pre-Surgery

Tomorrow is the big day. Torn rotator cuff repaired. Arm in a sling for 24/7 for 4 weeks. I will not be able to type or much else for that matter.
I have had surgeries before but for some reason this one is scaring me. Oh well.....soldier on.

We closed up the lake house this weekend. It is always a bit sad to do. All the colorful adirondack chairs piled and stored away along with the umbrella's and floating lounge chairs. All the summer fun with those items, all piled away for the winter.
On a happy note - the leaves were gorgeous reds, oranges and yellows. It smells so delicious. I love the smell of fall.

We are surrounded by trees on this 1 acre of land on the water and while it is beautiful it also means a ton of work. We spent 2 days blowing those leaves off the wrap around deck and driveway and yard. It's never ending. I am sure if we could go down this thanksgiving we'd find another pile on the deck that was calf deep. This will be our first thanksgiving not at the lake in years. It will be weird. But I know I will be unable to make that drive next week.

I've been running around busy as hell before the surgery tomorrow. Preparing food so hubby has something to come home and just nuke for dinner. Laundry, bills paid, food in fridge and cupboards, all errands run, make sure all his work clothes are there for a few weeks from cleaners and laundry. All of this before I can leave for surgery. Got me to thinking about when I traveled all the time for work. Same thing. When my husband traveled for work he packed and left. I went through a week of prep for being gone. Same thing here. I got to thinking what would my husband be doing if his surgery was tomorrow morning. NOTHING. He would get up and go to the hospital. End of story. I've been preparing everyone and everything for a week. Jeez, this may end up being a vacation for me after all.
:-)

See ya all soon.

Weekend

Just came back from the grocery store to load up my house with food I can't eat for company that is coming. Hubby and I are a couple without kids so we don't normally have "kid" food. Hell when I was growing up my parents didn't give us "kid" food we ate what the adults ate or we didn't eat. But I digress.....

I got a couple bottles of wine in hopes that the adults could have a nice evening of drinks and conversation but I know that would never happen when I suddently saw the aisle with baby benadryl and I got to thinking....
I could put this in the kids beverages so the adults could actually finish a complete thought without interruption or have a full conversation this weekend ....hmm....is that wrong?

Left Over Halloween Candy

Okay it's been awhile since I've written I know.
I was emailed yesterday to ask if I was okay.
I am.

I have to admit that I am not on top of my game right now. I am in a lot of pain with this damn torn rotator cuff and it's not getting any better. I can't sleep and my ass is dragging 24/7.
So between being exhausted beyond belief and in a great deal of pain it's been a real ball of fun.

My surgery is the 13th and I am actually looking forward to it because I think I'll at least be out of pain....or so I hope I will be afterwards.

I have family coming this weekend so I have a lot to do to prepare. The stress of it all.
The food, the activities to keep the kids amused so every now and then we adults can get a conversation in. You know the drill- clean, cook, amuse.....stress.

We only had a small amount of trick-or-treaters last night. Very very odd for us.
At first we thought because of ole W's smart idea to move daylight savings time up a few weeks and it was now light outside no one was ringing our doorbell. But it never really picked up later either. We live in a development of nothing but little ones running around so this was so weird.
Where did they all go?

We have so much candy left over it isn't even funny. Thankfully I only buy what I don't like so there is no chance in hell I would eat any of it. Know anyone who loves full size Kit-Kats or Reese's Peanut butter cups send 'em over - my husbands waist line depends on it.