Rick has been working with some cedar in his shop. It has been an interesting wood for him to turn. It is beautiful and boy does it have a strong scent.
My husband had a man come to our house to buy his router bits. Good ole Facebook market or craigslist. I hate these. I worry about who is showing up and if he goes there I worry if he will return. He just laughs at me, but... It was $200 worth of router bits. The man shows up and says, "why do you only want $200, these are very nice?" Rick told him he knows they are nicer than average but he felt that was fair because he's had them for a while. The man said, "well then, they're mine!" Apparently, this man is building a workshop.
Then he sees some of Rick's work. I made Rick put up a metal shelving unit he had in the shop. He can put all his work on it instead of it just being some here, some there. We organized it as accessories, bowls, charcuterie, cutting boards, etc. He likes it now that he's done it and it does showcase his work and puts it all in one place. The accessories are the big hit and my God did that surprise us. The pipes for pot, the wine stoppers, the bottle openers. All the little stuff that people have asked if he could make sell very well.
The man sees all of Rick's work and is asking a ton of questions. He tells Rick he moved here from Chicago 6 years ago and bought 30 acres of land. (He is in his50s now) He shared with Rick that he has some fallen trees on his property and that perhaps he could use some of them for his work.
When this man got home he showed Rick via text some of the wood that had fallen. He had a couple of burls which are very expensive to buy so Rick jumped at the chance to get these for free. Rick offered him money twice and each time he said, "no way, you're helping me out too"
Now burls mean nothing to you and me but they are coveted by Rick. He has only had one and that was given to him. Some of them (most) are hundreds of dollars so to make something it would have to be priced accordingly. So Rick feels he isn't there yet to be able to sell that high end but he so wants to "play" with some burls.
Rick came home with the cedar wood from his "farm" and began making something right away. I walked into the shop in the afternoon to say Hi and all I could smell was cedar. It smelled like I just walked into a cedar chest. So just like the wood that was from bourbon barrels the smell really permeated the entire shop
At the end of Rick's day, he takes the air pump thingy and blows all the shavings off him before he enters the house - it helps a little bit - trust me I have wood shavings all over the damn place. Anyway, he takes a shower and then comes into the kitchen. He gives me a big ole bear hug and I smell cedar. I ask, "didn't you just shower?" He tells me he has and I can see he is wearing clean clothes. Gee that's weird.
We continue to make dinner and as I am standing next to him at the kitchen island I really smell cedar. I saw him blow off the chips, I know he showered, what gives? I bend down to his big ole arm holding on to the island and I smell his forearm. Oh my goodness he still smells like cedar. I laugh and ask if he actually used soap in the shower. He laughs and says, "Yes, I am not 12 anymore."
He lifts his arm to his nose and goes, "Oh my god I smell like a cedar chest" He went to the sink and tried dawn on his forearms. Then dried them. They still smell like cedar. I told him that I think it is stuck in his hair and skin and I think you are just going to smell like this for a while. We both laughed because what the hell else are you going to do? He kept telling me it could be worse. Indeed it could be.
So for a few days, everything around here smelled like cedar. There are far worse smells we could have had. But this was funny.
You see when he is turning a bowl all the shavings will go onto his arm. I will have to video him turning a bowl sometime to show you all. He just finished this cedar bowl. He made it to give to the guy who gave him all the wood. He really was admiring all the work in Rick's shop so he thought since this man wouldn't take the money he could at least do this for him.
I asked Rick about this man living on 30 acres an hour away in the middle of nowhere. He said he seems so normal but I drove up and see his small home on these 30 acres. The home was older but nice enough. He had a barn where he made a workshop like I did to our garage. He had a feral cat that hung around and it had babies so now he has 7 cats.
Oooh, creepy to me!!
I asked if a wife lived there or perhaps a person was locked in a shed or something?
I had a mental picture of a really creepy dude.
Rick laughed and replied that his wife was pulling into the driveway as he was walking him to his car. She too looked normal. Later that evening Rick said, "he was a really cool dude I could be friends with?" My head snapped back so fast - WHAT? Really? Oh, when you deliver this bowl can I go with you? I won't go far since there are so many damn black cats about but I think I need to witness this person and place.
Its all creepy to me. So if we don't come back - you'll know where to find us.
We have all been talking about gray hair here and on other blogs. There is a colorist who I have been following for several years on Instagram. He does beautiful work. A client can take 8 hrs to get this color but he is worth every cent.
Because in the 70s I cut hair (barber) and I did color hair for a while I find it all interesting so I tend to follow things of interest. This man is a miracle worker. I actually asked someone if they could do what he does. Their response was, "Oh you must be looking at Jack Martin's work. No one can do this but Jack Martin." I said to her, he shares what he uses and the process and holds online classes for stylists, others can do this if they want. Then she said, "well it'd be expensive" I lived at the time in a county that was #2 in income per capita in the US per wikipedia. She charges me $70 for a pixie haircut and she's telling me it's going to be expensive? Shit, everything here is expensive.
That to me was a damn lazy answer. She didn't wish to learn or she wouldn't be talking me out of paying her a lot of money. Dumb ass.
2 years ago during Covid, he went national. He was on television and my husband said, "Hey isn't this the guy you follow?" Yes, indeed it is.
I think during lockdown every woman contemplated no longer coloring their hair and he was here to help you. Nothing, I repeat, nothing is uglier than a box hair color. You can spot them miles away. No dimension, just flat color. I've used them too when in a pinch over the years and always regretted it. Never again. Just let your gray go or see this man! You must have a minimum of 3 inches of gray I believe for him to do this properly. He will do the rest. Instead of looking like hell as I did with half my hair gray and half brown, he will transform you to the desired gray to match your roots, and then it will grow out naturally.
Rick asked me if he was expensive. I said I don't think so but some would.
If you worked for 8 hrs and could take no other clients how much do you think it's worth? If he can do 12 cuts and a couple colors in 8 hrs how much would he make? That's how much it costs. I know that doesn't help but it can be up to 2K. That is a lot.
In all honesty, it's not too much for his work on his feet for 8 hrs or more to me. But that's me. I recall when perms were priced at the time (2 hrs let's say) and what you'd make in that 2 hrs if not focused on one person. So you could do 5 cuts in that time at $25 each then it would be $125. So that's the cost of the perm. Now, this was how we did it in the 70s. Because a haircut at $25 is not what you want to get today or you're getting a newbie right out of school and it will show. Do they even do haircuts under $50 today?
I couldn't afford Jack's services. I ended up doing it the old-fashioned way.
I looked like a Walmart shopper. I mean where else do you see 4 inches of white roots and the rest brown? Yep, nowhere else. I wore a hat for a long time! Thank God we were in lockdown and I had short hair. As soon as I could get a hair cut my brown was gone. Whew, no more hats!
I still toy with the idea of going back to brown but then I remember how expensive it is every 5 weeks and I will leave it gray.
***I got a 3rd booster as my family doctor suggested. I have never had a reaction to a vaccine. I've had 'em all, pneumonia, shingles, covid, boosters, and all the ones as a kid. But this 3rd booster was weird.
My arm hurt more than ever. Then at dinner, Rick asked me what I had under my sweatshirt. I asked what he was looking at? Then I looked down at my left arm. Oh my goodness. I lifted my sweatshirt and pulled out my arm. It was like I had a good size ball under my arm. Bigger than a gold ball but smaller than a baseball. To me, it was huge. Almost cartoonish. It had a big red circle all around it and boy did it itch.
The next day it was just as bad only the red was now a deeper brighter red and my God did it itch and hurt. I assumed it was no big deal and would go away but it was now a week. Online it stated one should contact the place that gave me the booster to discuss. I contact CVS and they told me, "I don't know. Call your doctor"
I left my doctor an email since this was not urgent. The nurse emailed me and said this was a reaction but it's not bad unless the red is going down your arm. Then call us!
The red never went down my arm. It still is swollen but not bad - you can't see it under my clothes. The itching is just now starting to slow down.
It now only hurts to touch and not if I lay on it. So that was fun. What the hell is happening to me?
I've gone to the doctor more since moving here than I have in my entire life I swear. And it just keeps going.
***Since chemo, my teeth have been very sensitive and hurt. It was concerning me. I figured since I haven't had them cleaned in one year, I might as well get everything taken care of. Well, guess what? Chemo does this to your teeth.who knew this? Seriously I don't find chemo has done much that is positive except for my eye. Which I realize is a good thing. But everything else is so awful. This dentist explained it all to me and was so patient with all my questions. I admit I came home to google it to see if what she was saying was true. Because heaven's knows the internet is always correct more than my doctor. Ha!
Oh my goodness yes she was so right. Sometimes this goes away but more often than not, if you get this side effect, it's yours!
Yipee.
After going down this rabbit hole regarding my teeth and chemo I read so many sad stories. People losing teeth and this poor girl is only 30 and they are pulling her teeth. She is so unhappy. It was a sad story.
I am lucky and thankful that is not what I have going on. 🤞
***Lastly, I am a fan of Bruce Springsteen. My husband thinks he is alright, not a big deal. Take him or leave him kind of thing. Well, I listened to a 2 hr music interview that was so damn good. I said to Rick you should listen while you're out in your shop.
Now I cried a couple of times listening to this. The story and song he sang to Clarence Clemens on his last visit to him in the hospital did me in! Rick came in the house at the end of his day and asked if I got through that interview without a tear. I said, "I'm not heartless. Of course"
Rick didn't think he'd feel anything but the whole thing moved him. He now likes Bruce. Funny how that works.
If you have a Sirius app - put in the search for Howard on demand. Scroll through there until you see 2h 15min, Bruce Springsteen. It is only a 2 hr interview. No commercials. Only Bruce talking and him playing music.
Even if you hate Howard - you won't need to worry about him except for his musical and personal questions. Nothing bawdy. It's really good to me.
I got to see Bruce once. It was in the early 80s. I was working at the ticket counter for an airline. Our head of Operations was a huge fan - got in line and waited for tickets. Back in the day before the internet. He came to work with 7 or 8 tickets to Bruce's show in Cleveland Ohio. We lived in PA and this was a work night so driving there didn't sound appealing. We could fly for free so let's fly.
He sold all the tickets to his co-workers. We ended up flying to Cleveland, renting a van and all of us headed to the concert. BUT the show was waaay longer than 2 hrs - it was 3.5 hrs and we all lost track of time. We didn't get the last flight home needless to say. So we went back to the rental car and asked to keep it and we'd have a drop-off fee leaving it in Erie PA. Oh well.
We all split the cost to get home.
We got home around 2:30am. 4 of us had to start work at 5:30am.
My husband is not dealing well with things that I find very funny.
But after 35 years learning something new about him is nice even if annoying.
Now to give you a bit of knowledge about this guy I have to tell you about his issue with being on time. Oh my goodness he behaves like his heart will stop or his loved ones will most certainly die tragically or the earth could actually swollow him whole right there if late, in which case would be his choice. He can not deal with being late. He will pace. He will get all anxious and twitch and move his fingers in ways I have never seen him do before. All because he may be late. Oh, he has full-blown anxiety about being late.
One day I asked him if it makes him feel antsy. Oh my goodness I got the rundown of how it makes his "innards" feel to quote him. I listened and said, "babe that is full-blown anxiety" No, no, I don't have anxiety, I just don't like to be late. I reminded him of one of the things he does that he hasn't mentioned and that was he becomes cranky if he sees he may be late.
He laughs and said, that is true.
Now mind you he is never late. He will never be late. But the possibility makes him crazy. He had an appointment at 1pm. He was leaving the house at noon. I said, "it's 15 minutes MAX away"
"Well, I've not been there so maybe it will be more. I don't want to be late." I grabbed his hands and asked him to come to sit with me. He is laughing, he knows what I'm doing. He does not need to leave here at noon. He keeps trying to see the time without me seeing him and he is so damn entertaining that he thinks I don't see him. At 12:30p I said, "hey why don't you leave now this way you'll only be 15 minutes early"
He was up and out of that chair so fast, yelling behind, Love you see you later. I just shake my head.
Then he did this again - but it was on Halloween.
Now we used to get over 100 kids a year at our old place. Last year we went to the neighbor's Halloween party (worst ever!) so if anyone stopped by we didn't know.
This year Rick insisted we buy candy.
The closer it got the more he went on about it.
I said, "we don't get any kids Rick what is the point?"
Oh, that made him anxious. Gotta have candy just in case he keeps repeating. Even though neighbors have told him we don't get kids 'up this way' as they say.
What if a kid comes by are we going to pretend we aren't home? That is horrible. You really didn't buy any candy?
No. We.don't.get.any.kids.here!
How about we just buy the small (gasp) bars that normal people give out.
Fine, I give in.
So Rick bought his bags of "fun" size bars which are not fun for anyone.
I did not turn on the outside light fasts enough for him, he seemed to think I wasn't going to for some reason and he wanted it on now!
He said, "it's getting dark we want to have them see the walk up to our house"
He is walking back and forth for who knows why.
"The walk up to our house will make them all stay away you know. If I were a kid and had to walk up this drive and walkway I'd sure not want some tiny bag of skittles. Besides no one will be coming, Richard!"
Well just in case.
Yep just in case.
He is now on the porch with his bowl of candy sitting on the sofa. I stay inside. He is waiting. He waited for 2 hours. No kids. House lit up, candy all ready and an anxious man all waiting for them to show up.
At 8:30p I went to the door and asked if he was coming in. Leave the light on if it makes you feel better. He did.
So now we add not having Halloween candy and being on time on the same anxious list. Everything else in the world could be falling apart, but if the apocalypse is on time then Rick will be very calm & blissful. But if it's late, he will be very anxious.
I was in line at the deli counter waiting to get served. A woman behind me tapped my shoulder and asked me who colors my hair at what salon? My color is courtesty of God I tell her, as I do everyone.
What's with everyone thinking I paid to go gray?
I tell her that by the age of 66 I have no intentions of dying my hair anymore. She asked, "When do you turn 66?"
Now I am going to admit my first thought was, "Are you crazy, I just said it." But I did not thankfully say that.
Instead I responded with a chuckle and said, "Last March is when I turned 66"
She made a fuss and said I looked at best 56. (LIAR.)
I told her I was poor and could not pay her for that nice comment. She just laughed.
(I look 66 people!)
She then asked if she could take a photo to show her sytlist how she wants it white around the face but not the whole head.
Geez lady, I don't even like to have my picture taken by my husband.
I say okay and put on my sunglasses. She laughs and says that is probably a good idea to make this private.
I have to say while that is really nice to be complimented, I have never had anyone come up to me to ask about my hair color until I went natural during lockdown. When it was brown but I kept the white around my face I got asked a lot about what color they used to get the white in the front. But never once has anyone asked and I've been coloring my hair since sun-in in the 70s. Then in the 70s henna was all the rage. Then highlights. Then full on colors. I've been everything but blonde. But now I'm done.
I do find this funny that this happens so often to me now that I have gray hair. You'd think that pretty chestnut would have been a winner.
Apparently not.
In other news -
I moved here from DC and for the love of God the politcal ads in DC were far less offensive, far less complete utter bullshit and far less mean spirited.
Think about that for a minute - I.came.here.from.DC.
Never in a million years did we think it'd be so damn ugly here.
In fact we thought it would be far less ugly here.
Now because we need to vote we must learn who is running in our new state and county.
Each political commerical we have no idea what party this is.
We listen and learn.
We thought that would be a good thing not knowingn so we can be unbiases. We can just hear what they have to say and then do our own homeowork on said individual voting record etc. We actually thought this would be a good thing.
We found there were 2 distint type ads, only 2. -
1. LOUD, filled with fear, spewing things as a negative when both of us are thinking it's not a negative, mean spirited and ugly and always berates with ugliness towards their opponents whether true or not.
2. normal tone, no fear-filled agenda, telling you how they will vote, how they have voted and what things mean to them on several levels. NEVER mentioning an opponant.
We would write down these names.
It has become quite clear who is what party. Isn't that damn sad?
Number 1 is clear and utter bullshit. We wrote some things they said and then did our research and found it was all lies.
Number 2 told us things that after we researched we found them to be true.But some things that we felt were important were left out a few times.
One of our favorite Number 1 fear based ads was that they were going to hire thousands of IRS agents to take your money. Not because they have needed more people in the IRS dept for a few years because they are overwhelmed.Or because it has been stated that this would get you your refund faster. Oh no, this was ONLY so they can come to your home to take your money from you. They even tell you not to open your door to the IRS.
I mean that's what the IRS does daily right, knocks on doors? No shit we even recorded this ad to show someone because we couldn't believe they could out and out lies like this. But the dumb asses here apparently believe this to be true. It's laughable and damn sad.
So we've made our decisions.
We do laugh each time we see the commerical for this one woman.
They say her name and tell you how she beats her children, they read excerpts from the police report. How she tried to run over an ex husband and how her current husband got a restsraining order. I mean c'mon this has to be fake right?
Not one ad have we seen in the last 3 months have been from her disputing these claims or an ad saying something good she's done.
Not one ad. I guess she figures she can't fight that. It made us laugh.
Of course she belongs in group 1. We have begun to figure them out now from the ads. We even looked to see if this shit was true. Sure enough she was arrested for a couple of those things. She blamed it on bad husband behavior and being able to disipline her children, you know like all parents do - punching them in the belly AND face to require hospital care.
If not so sad you'd have to laugh at her.
All Rick and I know is that we can't wait to vote so we don't have to see these damn commercials anymore!
She just text to say something came up and to reschedule. I get that happens. I really do but honestly, we have moved mountains and rearranged dr. appointments because this is what worked for her.
We got the text at 12:30pm and we looked at each other and said, well that messed up the day. Then Rick suggested, how about naked Thursday?
Not again funny boy.
This appointment was to be a zoom. So I did my hair and makeup.
Silly I know. I look decent from the neck up. How did we all live before zoom?
This morning Rick told me he was going to drop off the bourbon bowl to the people where they gave him this wood. He asked if I wanted to go along. Sure! It's a large commercial building, a pretty nondescript building actually.
It is owned by a company called Barn Side of a Broad.
They are a local wood supplier.
They specialize in barn wood and milling services. More on them later.
A man who rents workshop space at Barn Side of a Broad has been working with Rick for a couple of months. Rick made a charcuterie board that will be given as a door prize for this town's library event in Vermont.
The woman who commissioned this wanted it to be like water as well as American Walnut.
She wanted the name of the area engraved on it in a special font.
Rick does not have a C & C machine (engraves) so he goes to this man. The man downloaded the font into the C & C machine and viola it was done. On that day he got the board engraved he gave Rick two oak hunks of wood that he had laying around.
Rick showed the Vermont woman two others that he felt were far more beautiful but this one to her looked like water and wanted it. Rick packed it up and threw in his tootsie rolls and off it goes. For a mere $61.00 in shipping. Geez!!
Rick pays for shipping normally but he needs to rethink that.
First of all most have been local.
But Vermont was not a cheap shipping cost. Wood is heavy.
It was $160 for his time/labor, the cost of supplies to make it, and $61 went to shipping. Oops.
Hard lesson learned. I suggest they pay for shipping. We give them the option of 3 days or ground service or something like that. We now have to figure out this situation.
When Rick brought the free wood back to his shop he began to work with the wood and make a bowl.
Rick began to turn it and he got such a smell of bourbon. He wondered if these were some type of bourbon barrels. I smelled it too. It was strong.
But there were also some burnt areas on the wood. He asked the guy if it had been in a fire. He insisted it had not. So today he walked in with the bowl, filled with Halloween candy. The man was blown away, he then saw the burn marks and said, man, I didn't think this had been in a fire but you're right it had to be. And the fact that it was so very hard to turn, it was very dry so putting two and two together Rick assumed a fire, and this time he agreed.
One of the women walked by and he told her to come over he explained what wood blocks he gave Rick and she said, "And you made THAT out of THOSE? Oooh, there's candy!" Who cared about anything after she saw all the chocolate. After that, it's all they talked about.
Women from all over the building came over to see the candy bowl. LOL.
Rick said he has never seen that many there any time he's been there. When he walked out two yelled, "Bye Candy Man, come back anytime!"
Rick made me laugh when he said, "Remember when I could just flirt and women would come around? Now I need candy" Oh my goodness that made us laugh.
My physical therapist was telling me how difficult it was to find a charcuterie board for this wedding. He is sharing all this as he is rubbing my ankle and foot so I will lay on this table as listen as long as he likes!
He has no idea my husband makes them mind you. He told me about this woman who told him to buy the board and then she'd cut it and add epoxy. He said he didn't because he knows that isn't how to do it. He was frustrated. I told him I have something to show him when I get off the table. So I show him the 3 that Rick has in the shop he is working on. All 3 are in the drying stage (3 days per) He went crazy and said that was what he was looking for. The following week I brought 2 of them inside. He took photos and sent them to his wife at work. His wife bought one and his wife's co-worker bought the other before I left PT. So that is how Rick is getting business. Right now not making more than keeping him in supplies but hopefully, he will make some money someday.
Still no website and still no photos because they were lost on the computer. We will get that back. "they" say. "I" hope!
I swear I wish I had had children just for the grandkids that could be helping me with all the computer issues.
Speaking of PT....I am done! My ankle feels great. Sure I still have some pain from time to time if I overdo things but it's gotten so much better that I don't even think about it anymore. To recap - no drugs and no bad ankle. YIPEE. Life is on the upswing.
Now, that Powerball win of $800million would be okay to round it all off.
Rick tells me to rewind to watch the man discuss his story of goats. Rick leaves the room to use the bathroom. I watch.
The story is funny, each room of this story something is going on so I'm watching and listening. The story is over. Cute, but no goats. Rick returns to the room and I say that was a long story but he never even mentioned a goat Rick. Rick whipped around and said goats? Yes, you said he had a funny story about goats.
Well Rick is laughing so hard he can't speak. He is taking his glasses off to wipe his eyes. I ask, what is so funny? Did I miss it? Oh that line made him howl all the more. Pointing to me but can't speak. Finally he calms down and spells G.H.O.S.T.S. Oh my God, ghosts! Here I'm waIting for a fucking goat to appear in this story.
We both are laughing so hard now we have tears falling. But I don’t know why I'm laughing- because I'm laughing at myself. Rick has decided that a hearing aid would ruin all his fun so I'm going to continue on my deaf journey. Besides it's a marriage saver, we belly laugh every day. Laughing at me, but...
I told you all how much I loved the show Bad Sisters.
Well, it was driving Rick and me crazy that you know at the very beginning that this man will die. It's not a secret you find out in episode 5. No, you know it immediately. But you don't know how or when. Oh, you learn why. That is the problem. He is vile.
We felt we'd been teased and tormented enough.
We wanted this guy dead. Dispecible human being.
Each week one more episode drops to watch and the son of a bitch was still breathing.
We decided as I shared here, that we were not going to watch another episode until they were all completed. I knew there were 10 episodes so by episode 7 we stopped watching.
I do not understand the whole droppping 1 episode a week. If I wanted that I wouldn't be on a streaming service I'd watch NBC. Geez.
Can you imagine going to a movie and then they stop the movie and they tell you to come back next week. NOooooooo...
Anyhoo, we went back and watched from episode 7 to the bitter end and we cheered. This was such a good show. Dark and Funny. My favorite.
As I have said as well here, Sharon Horgan writes shows I love.
She is so very funny, dark, and twisted. She is Irish and it shows in all of the most excellent of ways.
Now, this week I have a very busy week coming up. None of these things that are going to keep me busy is anything I wish to do. So that makes for a fun week. Dentist, mammogram, medicare advisor etc. See? Nothing fun.
This week a new show called The Good Nurse is going to be streaming on Netflix. It's in theaters right now. I don't do movie theaters anymore so I will wait until Wednesday when I can watch it at home with my popcorn. I assume since it was in theaters it will be streaming. If not, we will not watch until we can stream it!
This is a true story about a nurse who killed hundreds of people in several states and could keep getting jobs. They believe he may be the serial killer who killed the most people. He admitted to killing 40 patients. They believe there to be more.
I like Jessica Chastain. She plays the nurse who helped get him caught.
It looks like a good thriller even though I know the outcome. It has gotten rave reviews so here's to having some TV that isn't baseball this week.
We headed off to Duke. Rick always has to drive me because I get my eye dilated and can't see shit to drive home. I honestly feel like a child that he must drive me, he keeps telling me he doesn't mind.
I am never there for less than 3 hrs. So that makes me feel bad for him.
I registered and got seated in the waiting room by the doctor's rooms.
I am then taken to a room where I have to read an eye chart, have my eyes dilated, and numbed, then they took the pressure of my eyes.
That is all fun, but the real fun will begin in a few minutes.
Then I head down to a room for all these photographs.
They held my head this time and they took lightning photos of my eye.
I mean, it's like lightning it's so damn bright and it's fast and you can't blink. At one point she held my eyelid up. It's hard for me as my eyes are tearing. The tech was nice and said she prefers to just hold the eye for people and most don't like it but you've been cooperative. That made me laugh as if I had a choice. She just said, 'close your eyes" and when I did she put her very cold fingers on my eyelid and opened it.
Besides, I prefer her holding it so I can't blink, just tear. Oh, do I tear.
I then head to another room with a different machine and have more light shown in my eyes. The contraptions have me put my one eye in a weird position and then have to move my eye around for these photos. It's so odd but let us not forget, that bright light in my eyes. It makes the glaucoma test seem like a small tiny light in the distance in comparison.
Both eyes this time. I guess for comparison or the tech was a sadistic SOB. She was very very nice I joke. This tech told me when I asked about doing my good eye that this was to be sure it hasn't spread to this eye. Yikes.
I conveniently always forget about that tidbit.
Then I am taken back to the room to talk to the Doctor after all this.
During this long walk through Duke hallways, she tells me she loves my haircut. Did I always have short hair? I want to cut mine she tells me but I've been afraid. Her hair was to her shoulders. I suggested doing a little at a time. She asked if I did. I said nope. first time I went short was after a break up. Stereotypical right? I had shoulder length hair and it was the 80s. you know big hair. I walked in and said shave the one side and leave it long on the rest. I mean, I went nuts. she laughed and said she could never be that brave. She dyes her hair salt and pepper. She asked who does mine. I told her God or Mother Nature whomever you believe in. She laughed and said I was lucky. Hmmm, not my thoughts but I'm happy everyone else likes it. And now we're at the door to the doctors room and she made me forget for a few minutes why I was there. Then I felt the familiar jump in my belly.
I am a bit stressed.
He bounces in. He looks skinnier than ever. I want to feed this man.
Even my husband said this so it wasn't just Peg who has a need to feed as Rick loves to say.
The doctor is so full of energy...and young.
He comes in and says, "Good Afternoon Peggy, how's Betty treating you?"
I chucked and said, "I'm hoping you can tell me"
He pulls up his computer and says, "let's find out"
He begins to pepper me with questions while looking at all the pictures. I can see them too. I see the difference but I am not sure what I am looking at. But the big blobs sitting on what he points out is my retina and the nerves are far smaller. Wow.
For this visit, I asked Rick to come into the room with me so if I had to go over procedures and/or different therapies I wanted him in the room.
1. because he always asks me questions and there is always 1 I can't answer.
2. If I forget something or if I have to pick 1 out of 4 horrible choices I kind of like him to help me as silly and 1950s as that sounds. He can walk me through this and as we talk I can then clearly see what I need to do. Not that I want him to tell me what to do. Hell, that is never the choice I pick, as he'd tell you. I just need to bounce it off someone other than this doctor who wants me to do things I don't wish to do.
So Doctor S shows me the new pictures and we compare them to the other pictures. It has shrunk more since the last time I was there.
Now that shows you the chemo is still working he says (oh you don't have to tell me it's still in my system!)
After we review the photos there are questions and answers.
He says, "So you are really sure you don't wish to do chemo again?"
I told him I was POSITIVE if there are other options.
He then pulled up my eye test. He was impressed. It went to 20/25.
That is so good out of an eye I could see nothing out of before.
In fact, it is actually remarkable. When I see this a part of me thinks, oh what's another 6 months of chemo? Then I remember and NO I do not want chemo!
I told Dr. S at this point that I am just now beginning to feel somewhat normal. I still have side effects but they are waning. I do not wish to go on more drugs. Isn't it possible to just let Betty be? It's not cancer. I can now see. Can we monitor this and if it gets bigger or begins to grow you can do that shot in my eye as you suggested now that it's this small?
How about I come every 6 months?
Dr S: 6 MONTHS?! Oh No No! I'll do every 3 months.
Peg: How about we meet in the middle at 4 months? No drugs and if I come back and it's grown you are able to do a shot right? Of course, if I find that I am bumping into walls again I will call immediately and come in to see you.
Dr. S: Yes. Hmm, well you can see now. It's remarkably smaller.
Okay, I give. I'll try this because I do not believe it will ever go away 100% as we have discussed many times.
You can go 4 months, not my 3. Deal?
You lived with it like this for 6 years in VA and it was stable until you moved here. Okay, every 4 months I'll do and if anything changes for you including pain in your eye again let me know right away you got that?
Peg: I can so live with that!! I could kiss you, Dr. S.
Dr. S: he laughs but turns to both Rick and me and whispered "that's what all the girls say"
We both laughed. Rick said later that he whispered because he knew he wasn't allowed to say such things, HR would be on his ass so quick. (rick worked in HR) I laughed and said I guess he was willing to risk it because he kinda knows us now and can see we aren't normal and we wouldn't go to HR and get him in trouble.
So NO drugs! I can continue to get this shit out of my system, which he continues to tell me could be 6 months sometimes longer.
I return in February to do this all again and if it has grown I get the ole sharp stick in the eye. If it is still stable, we move along until 4 months later and we'll do it again. We shall see. HA, no pun intended.
I can't even begin to tell you how thrilled I am about this.
The night before I was stressed. I wasn't thrilled with the sharp stick in the eye but I was so worried about more drugs. I knew the shot in the eye was prednisone, which I have begun to hate, and I knew it came with a side of Humira, which I'd have to inject myself with twice a month I believe.
Rick left his ugly chair and came over to where I was on the sofa and just gave me a hug. I asked, "what is that for?"
He said, "I can hear you stressing over here! It's going to be fine, the worst is over, you're gonna be fine!"
He makes me laugh. I didn't even have to share the words and he knew.
I was stressing and thinking about it. In all honesty, I have a lot of issues with the side effects of drugs. I wish I didn't and I could enjoy them like my friends and husband. 😁
My husband used to say in his corporate days when he got home on a Friday that a Vicodin and a glass of wine would be the perfect way to end his week. That would always make me laugh. Not like he did it. He just used to say it. But if he had had one...
I got Vicodin once after surgery and I broke out in hives so bad the hospital told me they had never seen it this bad before and the ones on my head and hands were miserable. So drugs and I don't mix well. Good thing I never did anything more than pot as a kid. I fear what may have happened to me.
I used to be the driver or the hair holder to all my friends taking acid, mushrooms,etc. Ah, the early 70s. I drank, and I loved pot.
It's all the same today. No other drugs for me, I'm a big fat wuss.
So when we left Duke it was one helluva good high I was on. No more drugs! I can see pretty damn well out of this eye! I am free to continue to let all this shit out of my body for 4 more months. If I had won the lottery it would have been the perfect day.
So there ya go. Betty has not left the building. She seems to like her place in my eye. I wanted to make it more of a hostile environment but I am not willing to do 6 more months of chemo. I had someone say, just do 6 more months. Hmm, you do it for me and then tell me you want more. Call me a baby, a wuss, anything you want because I do not care.
I've lived it and don't wish to again.
I don't even remember the beginning days when I was so amped up on 60mg of steroids and chemo. I was out of my mind as well as physically sick. I recall being so very ill and thinking death couldn't be any worse but that's all. I remember the later parts because I was taking less as time went on of steroids. Steroids are evil !!!!!
I'm going to have a fun weekend of painting or some such thing that is a constant in my life now. It could be worse right? I could have to be on chemo again. So painting sounds wonderful to me!
____________
Betty's not leaving but Betty Lou's Getting Out Tonight.
I love this song from way back in the 70s. I had never seen it to this video though and it kind of made me laugh. A good many of those clothes are back in styles which I think is cool.
I am off to Duke Eye Ctr today. I got a 7.5 week reprieve from drugs and now starting round 2. I am just now starting to feel more like myself so if course more drugs to ruin that!
I was expecting a delivery Monday from Lowes. Rick's truck has died. The panels would not fit in my SUV. Rick's truck needs a new transmission and it has 200,000 miles on it. I think that means a new truck but I am not certain how - another story for another time.
I woke up and quietly tip-toed out to the hall bathroom. I was attempting to be a nice wife. HA You know, things like not using the master bath and making noise with the water and toilet flushing to wake up Rick. See I can be nice.
I closed the bedroom door ever so quietly and headed toward the hall bath.
My phone rang and it was in the living room on the charger. I ran to pick it up so Rick didn't wake up. It was Lowes. They are mere minutes away.
What? It's 7:56am! But I do not say that. I say okay.
But she just went on and on and I'm doing the pee-pee dance in my living room.
Then I thought to myself, "oh for heaven's sake take the phone to the bathroom."
No, gross!
Finally, I had to do what I swore I'd never do - I took my phone in the bathroom as I am saying yeah, yeah, yes, okay, yes to this crazy woman. Whew, she finally stopped talking so she didn't have to listen to me flush and then run water to wash my hands. I might add that is hard to do while holding the phone with your chin.
That was a new low but geez what a crazy minute after waking up.
Now I stepped out of the bedroom in my robe. Only a robe. If Lowes is coming I have to help them into the garage and sign so I need clothes. I quietly went back to the bedroom to search for clothes in the dark. I don't have time to shower or do my hair so I grabbed my toothbrush and paste, my NYY baseball cap, and head to the hall bath to brush my teeth and head to the garage to open one side up for the delivery men.
I am a very slow waker-upper.
All that had occurred since 7:56 am was just entirely too much and just too many things going on for me in my first 15 minutes of being awake.
So out to the garage I go and I hear my phone in the house.
Oh, c'mon it's just after 8am who would be calling me?
It's Dish, they are running ahead of schedule can they come in 30 minutes?
Sure, bring coffee is what I wanted to say but I did not. Now I realize they may need to get into our bedroom so Rick will want to get up and not be in bed when the Dish man gets here. So now I wake up Rick.
He moans, "why? We were up late last night."
Oh, my big baby. I tell him why, if he wishes to stay in bed so be it.
He hops out of bed and then he is already smiling and he begins to whistle.
Do you all know how annoying that is?
Who is that damn happy when you get up? Oh, we are so opposite of one another.
We are so alike except in talents and this morning thing.
Over the years you'd think I'd handle it better. I've gotten better.
I do not wish to kill him anymore but smacking the genuine smile off his face would be rewarding. Ooh very rewarding.
After 35 years he laughs at me. I've moved from ways to kill him to finding morning Rick just damn annoying as hell.
I know how bad that is of me but...
We both find this funny. Just not funny to me in the morning.
Back to Lowes ---
Lowes delivers what we couldn't fit in our car minutes later. I sign what needed to be signed and off we go. I turn on the coffee pot and yell to Rick about his coffee.
I am telling you no sooner we sat down with our coffee the Dish Man arrived.
Ah, geez.
He was such a nice and fun man.
Again all the people who have come to our home in this first year have been terrific. Every single one of them has blown us away with their professionalism, their kindness, and their ability to do the job. Rick and I both were once again blown away but this man. Dish Service Men who came to our house up north were Larry, Daryl and Daryl. (hope you know that reference)
This man even gave me a new cable for another TV that had nothing to do with why he was here. He gave it to me for free. I knew there was a cost because the last time they told me what it would be when I was ready. I got it for free and when under the house he saw the connection for the internet was not a good connection. He asked if we were having issues. I said "Yes, intermittent issues. " He said, "I'll fix that for you too. Don't tell Dish I did it though" Deal!
He was chatting with us while cutting wire etc.
After we explained the constant issues since moving here he asked where we moved from. We told him and he goes, "ooh expensive up there"
"yep, that's why we're here."
Now he has an accent, pretty heavy.
He said he moved here to North Carolina in 2018.
I asked where he moved here from and Rick jumps in and says before he can even answer, "New Jersey" Rick says this as a smart-ass answer to the man who he thinks is obviously from somewhere else.
I gave him a look to kill. You don't say that you ass.
Oh my goodness I panicked.
But thankfully this nice man begins to laugh like crazy.
He says to Rick, "Guess where I moved here from? Yep, New Jersey.
Gotcha Mr. H."
Oh my goodness we didn't offend him, he thought that was funny.
Rick apologizes and this guy says, "No, that was funny I knew immediately what you were thinking, I loved getting you back too. I like to bust your b-chops" They both laughed. Whew
He said he has been in this country for 30 years but he has not lost his accent. He shared what N. Jersey taxes on your home are compared to here. We understood that. He was so cute and funny though even when talking about taxes.
From the moment Rick said what he said to this man, he and Rick were always laughing and making jokes and teasing one another.
I loved it when he told Rick to pick the one in his left hand and Rick handed him the one in his right. "Other left Mr H. Hit your head?"
Then he winked at me while Rick is shaking his head at the dumb thing he just did.
He did his jersey accent spot on which made us both laugh. He then began telling us stories about Jersey and how he learned English 30 years ago as a kid. He said I sounded like an Egyptian with a Jersey-Italian-American accent. He added hand gestures that just made us crack up. He said he thought all Americans sounded like this until he ventured outside his neighborhood. Then he got speech & American English classes at his school. He had some great immigrant stories. I think he missed his calling and should be doing stand-up. I told him as much. He laughs and told us he's been told that by co-workers but he could never do such a thing he said. I think he should.
He was under our house in the crawl space, he was in the living room, office, and back again. He was here for 2.5 hrs.
We signed everything and off he goes. Yeah, can I now just have my morning ritual of quiet and coffee?
I see him go to his truck and then come back towards the house.
I thought he was done. He came back into the house and handed me what looks like a thick outlet cover but it was a small power strip.
I asked why he is handing me this. He tells me I need it in my office.
When he went in there he saw my set up and he said this would be better.
I told him I have a power strip under my desk for the printers and computer. He said yes, but use this one for the TV and lights on the other wall.
Now, my concern was I didn't want to buy it and I didn't think I really needed it either. But then he says, "it's yours for free. my gift."
But why?
"Because you needed it and I had it on the truck. Besides, you and your husband were fun."
"Thank you so much." (I still don't think I need it but I couldn't say no to a gift it felt weird)
"The job before you wasn't so nice."
He is shaking his head looking at me and making a face as if to say, oh they were awful.
He was funny. And he really should be doing stand-up.
Geez and here I thought Rick offended him. Still prefer he not say that kind of thing to strangers, this time it turned out okay but it may not next time. We don't want to be those damn boomers who offend everyone. At least not by accident. 😂
Baseball season is over for me for the most part. I may watch the World Series depending on who is in it. If it's Houston I will root for anyone, not Houston Cheatin' Astros.
If it ends up being the Cheatin' Astros and the Phillies, I will watch neither.
But if a fire were to my feet I'd probably go Astro's over Phillies. It kills me to say it but I'd have to. If you had told me the Dodgers wouldn't be playing I never would have believed you. Or that Atlanta couldn't beat the damn Phillies. Good thing I'm not Pete Rose 'cause I'd have lost all my money on those bets.
As I was watching a game yesterday the satellite kept going off and giving us an error message that said it was a weather issue. WHAT?
It's 80 degrees, with no wind, low humidity, and not a cloud in the sky.
What weather? Yesterday was perfect.
It came back on about 20 minutes later.
Then later around 2:00am, it did it again.
Right in the middle of something that was not streaming or on the DVR so I was just missing the rest of the movie. Insomnia and then this. I need a good book.
This morning I called Dish and they said they could see that there was a misconnection on the satellite dish etc. Great. Your issue, not mine for a change. They are sending someone here tomorrow morning you know between 10 - 12pm. Which generally means 2pm. 😊
We have had more issues with our satellite than we ever did in 22 years at our last home. How is that possible? We maybe had someone come out a total of 2/3 times in 22 yrs for issues.
I thought maybe during the hurricane's high winds something got "bumped" and that is why it's sporadic. What the hell do I know. On my monthly bill, I pay an additional $1 something (just under $2) for this kind of service so I am not shelling out any money. All visits are free as are all things inside that I may have to buy unless I have this. I got new extension cables for my office and things like that. It is worth it. On the last visit I would have shelled out a few $100 so I don't mind them coming out when I don't have to pay but them coming out is getting a bit much. They have been here so many times in 1 year. I told Rick I think it's where they have this satellite placed. We didn't choose it nor did Dish. The last woman who lived here had Direct and they just removed her dish and put ours on top of the same pole. It will be discussed tomorrow, that's for sure.
Now that I can read again, I tried to pick up a book everyone has been talking about. This is my 3rd attempt. My mind wanders and I am finding it boring. I think I am giving up. It's just not for me. It reminded me of Gone Girl. Not the storyline but the characters. I skipped a good portion of Gone Girl because there came a point where I was like, "you people are horrible humans and I don't give a shit what happens now to either of you!"
So then I skipped to the last chapter or two and saw how it resolved itself and that was enough for me. That is how I feel about these characters.
So I need a new book.
I am not overly thrilled with mysteries but some I do enjoy. I have a lot of books. I think that I may shop my very own bookcases in my office and living room and find something I haven't read in 20 years or so and see how it holds up.
I met a blogger several years ago when I started blogging. She was moving from Florida to Portland Oregon. She LOVES Portland. She likes to say she found her tribe and her city. I get that, mine was Northern VA.
She got a divorce and raised her 2 kids there. Then she saw an old flame again. He was in Portland and they had a date. Fast forward to a year of long-distance dating and he asked her to move to his home, in Winston Salem, NC. Her son was now on his own and didn't wish to move, he liked it there as well as his job. Her daughter is only 15 so she came with her of course. They are all in Portland now as I type this visiting what she calls a necessary mental health trip. I hope she can move back there someday.
I understand how she feels.
She HATES it here for all the same reasons I do. She is 2 hrs away.
I went to see her a few weeks ago for a quick visit because she had just gotten out of the hospital. She has been here twice. She saw all the changes/work we've been doing - be it ever so slow due to money.
She was standing in the living room looking at the books on the new bookcases when I walked in with her drink. She said WOW you have some old books. I laughed and said, "or you're just so young!"
You see she is 21 years younger than me. I said you can tell the years and my age - for example...Danielle Steele, Jackie Collins, and Dick Gregory. Danielle Steele would not be something I'd even pick up today. This was the 70s. I was in my late teens to my 20s. Then the 80s and Stephen King along with Fannie Flagg, etc. She saw the book The Color of Water by James McBride on my shelf. That pique her interest. I don't recall when I read this but it's an older book. A memoir. I recall it being just an excellent book. This went on with her comments on books, to the present-day books.
She asked if she could borrow from my library. She told me long ago she does not give out books anymore unless someone signs that it will be returned or a new one is purchased. She told me this years ago.
I too, do not lend books out. I stopped that many many years ago because I never got them back.
So I said, "Should I do what you do?" She said certainly!
So she checked out a few books for her trip to Portland this week.
I figure if she can read these old ones why can't I?
Add to that fact that my memory is shit these days so I may find a book on my own shelf that I don't remember from over 20 years ago and I may enjoy it again. I may start with The Color of Water now that I think about it.
Do you ever reread a book you liked? Do you remember it all? Or do you glean new things from it or just enjoy the book again?
My computer's keyboard was acting up. My computer is an All in One and wireless mouse and keyboard. My laptop is also dead.
We thought that was the issue for the sign in problem. Got a new keyboard. It didn't help. It would not allow me to connect to the network. It would not allow me into my computer. I had not lost anything but it was being difficult to say the least.
I called several companies. One called back. An angel was sent to my home. Oh my goodness when I tell you this was a lovely man, I mean that in every sense of the word. He was just perfect.
He arrived on time. We headed straight to my office. I explained and then showed him some things that were happening. I then sat in my comfy leather chair and prayed what he was doing was going to work. We went back and forth with my passwords and my sign-ins and he tried various things.
He showed me things I did not understand and I told him so and he'd laugh and say at least I was honest. Look when he was showing and telling me it made perfect sense but for me to share that with Rick or all of you - no way! I just knew he suspected my hard drive was the issue. All I heard was dollar signs. Shit.
We tried everything that I had googled which made him laugh at me. We tried everything up his sleeve as well. All things pointed to the hard drive.
So I was given options. I just can't afford a new pc or laptop but if the hard drive is almost as much why not get a new one. Oh, I didn't know what to do. I hate that money rules everything.
He raved about this Pavillion all in one when he got here. He told me at one point that these and the newer Dell are very good and last a long time and why. (but did it?) So he suggested as one option to just put a new hard drive into this one. The charge would be around $300. The other option is to sell me a new computer and honestly, it won't be anywhere near $300. So guess what? I got a new hard drive.
Yesterday was the most horrible day. If I were to tell you all the things that went wrong you'd think I was making it all up. Something as minor as going to Costco and all their cash registers not able to take debit cards or credit. No one could check out. But you didn’t find this out until your card didn't work at self check out. Cash only. Who goes to Costco with that much cash and even if you did you'd go over it, who are you kidding?
Yep, I'm not proud to say that minor thing sent me over the edge on a day with thousands of those.
I had picked up my computer prior to my last stop at Costco and brought it inside along with my Costco pickins and I refused to set up the computer. Nope, did not wish to know because if it didn't work, I was going to go into full-blown meltdown from the day I had. So I decided not to turn it on until today. With the exception of all of Microsoft 365 I have everything. Once I figure out how to restore that I should be good to go. Fingers crossed I should say the way things have been going. But so far so good. The most difficult thing so far is learning a new keyboard. Just a few buttons off and you're hitting delete where before it was a page down. Funny how a keyboard, such a small part of it all, makes such a difference. My keyboard didn't have many letters left that you could see. The buttons were fine but you couldn't see a letter on them. There were just enough letters so you could figure where your fingers needed to be and if you could type it was fine.
He made a mirror copy I believe of my hard drive and put it on the new one. He could even show me when I began having this problem that I didn't know I was having upon sign-in. Sometimes it was slower than others. I assumed due to the apps it was opening. But it was not. Sometimes it wasn't connecting and went and made a temp file. I don't know how that works but I saw it and that helped me to understand. God love this man and his patience. I also know he gave me a break in price. He was so kind. I wanted to hug him but knew that would be inappropriate so I just shook his hand. I can't explain it but as soon as I spoke to him on the phone it just felt good. He has the best energy.
Now I have a lot of blogs to read to get caught up on.
