Random things going through my little head.

Boy, I am back in the saddle. Vacation is definitely over!
Nutjob just called and asked if we would come due to the threat of Hurricane Florence. First of all, we are only getting rain. 
A lot of rain, but it's only rain. We are not in it's path right now.
Rain does not need to be plowed. We will be there.

Then she said that her house will be muddy and full of water if we come.
I suggested she reschedule. I mean look if you are this crazy then put yourself at ease and switch days. But no, she went on a tirade for a full 5 minutes about mud, water, hurricane oh my!

I explained how the men wear booties over their shoes. They will not be tracking in mud. The window that we open to put the tubing out for exhausting the fumes is fully covered so nothing will be able to come in. Typically without rain, the guys will vacuum up the bathroom and leave it normally better than when we arrived. Especially those bathrooms that have enough hair on the floor to make a full-size dog. Those are vacuumed before we start and then again after. Don't want hair flying around the room and embed in the wet coating on whatever we are refinishing. The guys wear baseball caps and long white glove type things if they have hair on their arms. They are hermetically sealed. 😊

But I listened to her hysteria and tried to calm her. She didn't want to wait until October so this is it. 

Now watch us go and get a hurricane and the weather people are wrong.
Won't that just make her right and crazy? 😨

I dropped my phone a long time ago. It's cracked everywhere. Then a pink line went down the side. It had become wider over the last 2 weeks making it hard to read. The battery was draining so quickly. Then on Monday night, it wouldn't shut off. It was possessed. It was jumping from app to app and I was not even holding it. I knew if it made it until morning I'd have to get a new phone.

Yesterday I finally got myself to the store to buy it. God how I hate that. 
I couldn't trade mine in because it was so damaged. I hate having this payment on my bill but forking out $799 for a phone just pisses me off. This phone better last me a long time. But just in case I got the insurance this time. 

Last night was spent getting all the things to work as it did before. Of course, I couldn't remember passwords and that whole nightmare. I spent my whole evening working on this silly stuff. These phones are necessary evils, aren't they?

Now to my weekly memes. Enjoy.

Change 80's to 70's and this is so very much ME!

 I mean, c'mon, 2 addictions at once. What's not to love?

I did nothing on my summer vacation.

We adults had a good time at the lake too.
Even though I worked from 8 - 12pm I could still have fun.

Now that we don't have a house there we rent homes or condos in different areas of the lake. We see and go to new places. The lake is large, 22,000+ acres and 500 miles of shoreline so there is a lot of places we don't go as often.

This condo is on a point or peninsula. 
It is a full 70-acre resort.

It has restaurants and bars right there.
Gift shops, indoor pools, tennis courts etc.
We drove over to a restaurant and then laughed because it took us all of 1 minute to get there. If it weren't for this boot on my foot we would have walked.
I did not wish to walk it, but normally I would like to think we would.

We went to a place that I have read and heard about for years and it was every bit as good as they said. I called ahead and told them I was celiac so I could ask my questions before sitting down and being the girl at the table with all the questions to the server who then has to go ask the chef etc. They put the chef on the phone. He thanked me for calling ahead and told me his Aunt is celiac as well so he really understood. I was thrilled. We discussed options for me and I got to ask him my questions because I had a menu at the condo I was looking at.

We made a reservation and got there on time. But the wait was long so we went to the bar. Then we decided to just eat at the bar. It was crazy busy and the restaurant was full, the outdoor patio where you can drive your boat up to was full and the bar had 4 seats left so we grabbed two.

The bartenders were fabulous. We had a couple of drinks and ate a great meal.
Rick has a cod meal that he raved about so much it was crazy. He had a mushroom risotto that was as good as he said, I tried it. I did not try the fish since I hate fish. I had a fabulous steak and the chef made sides for just me.
How lucky am I?
It was all so very good.

Rick talked about his meal every day after we ate there. Until our last night when I said, "want to just go back there instead of cooking?"  He jumped at that. We did not make reservations and figured it wouldn't be all that busy since the holiday was over and the lake dies down a great deal after "the season"
This time we took the boat over. Not a good idea. My hair was a hoot. So I asked if we could just sit at the bar. For some reason having wild hair felt better at the bar than the dining room.

We bellied up to the bar to be met with a loud, "hey welcome back" and a man sitting directly across from us said, "yes, welcome back." We smiled and said thanks but had no idea who this was. Apparently, he was there the night we were there too. The bar filled up and Rick ordered his same meal. I had a salad and it was great as well. Everyone at the bar was chatty and a game began.

We all played this trivia game and had such a nice time. Lots of laughter and goofiness. We both wanted another drink but since we drove the boat we felt we better not. We said our goodbyes and said, "see you in the spring!" The man to my right told me to not wait until spring to move there. I smiled and said,"someday." Knowing full well it's the south and I can never live there full time.

We went back to the condo to a dog very happy to see us and we made ourselves another cocktail. We sat on our patio with Izzy and we all stared at the water and wished we didn't have to leave.

We did a lot of nothing. Sunning, boating, swimming, eating, drinking and napping. Oh, the napping was great!!
One thing we did do before we left was to go by our old home.
We wanted to see if they made outside changes to the dock and boat house etc. They replaced the wood on the dock which we knew it needed before we sold. We also saw that they did not take down the sign we had put up under the roof of the boat dock. I tried to take a photo of it as Rick was slowly riding by, but it is all very blurry as you can see below.
It said We don't skinny dip, We chunky dunk.
Rick said that maybe they have never noticed it. How could they not?

Rick drove home as slow as molasses so we didn't get another ticket.
I told him I'd rather pay another ticket than he drives this slow. He did not agree.

It was wonderful to be away but I'm back to the grind. Maybe if I could go away every 3 weeks it would help don't you think?

Oh Oh, I wanted to share this. On the way down to the lake after our ticket, I was getting hungry. Not much I can eat when traveling and I didn't want to get out our cooler for something so we stopped at McDonald's. Rick got Izzy out of the car for a quick walk around the back and I went in and got us 2 small vanilla milkshakes.

We are driving down the road and at the same time we both got so drowsy. I mean it hit me and I just couldn't keep my eyes open and I felt so odd.  I asked Rick if he was okay. He said I can barely keep my eyes open. I was the same. I suggested we stop at this picnic area and close our eyes since Izzy was sleeping. We did just that. I felt drugged as did he. After 30 minutes we continued on but neither of us were the same. We were full of energy until we had that milkshake. We have been talking about it ever since. It seriously felt as though something was in that shake. Tryptophan? But what could it have been? The fact that this hit us both at close to the same time was awfully weird don't you think?

On the way home as we passed that Micky D's Rick said, "No milkshakes for you!" (like the soup nazi on Seinfeld) I laughed and agreed.
I am not sure I could ever have one again after that. It did not feel good and was mighty scary.
But we lived and had a wonderful week away from the city and the traffic.

Back to Work

If you are reading the header to this post it must be done in a whine because that is how I am feeling.

We came back to life in the 'burbs and are back to being landlocked. 
We had rented the home from Friday to Friday. 
We thought we'd come back to have 2 days to get into the faster life over a couple of days. Nope. ER for Izzy the Wonder Dog. 
Not certain just yet what is wrong with her but I will keep you posted as I know things. Scary stuff, I wish she could talk it would be so helpful. 

The day before I left I had to go to the Podiatrist. 
This past winter I fell down a flight of stairs if you recall me writing about that.
I fell down the stairs, went around a corner, grabbed a baluster, got myself upright and came down on my feet hard. It was a great Olympic move. 
Rick was walking into the house from the garage and saw me and said, "hey that was a 10" having no idea I had fallen. 
It has made a complete mess on my right side.
I keep putting off everything thinking it will work itself off but it hasn't. 
The foot pain was so bad I couldn't get a pedicure and have her touch me on the back of my heel without screaming in pain. I got to the point that I could not move my foot from my ankle towards me or away from me. 
So it was time to go see someone. Heels could not be worn. That was the breaking point for me.

Long story longer, I have mucked up my Achilles. Not torn thankfully. 
They gave me anti-inflammatories and I have to wear a walking boot for 6 weeks. ARGH! 
It's so cumbersome and difficult to walk in. It makes me taller on my right side so then you walk weirdly which throws off your hips and back. 
Honestly, this old age shit sucks. The doctor said to never wear completely flat shoes (I NEVER do) because it will be worse and no bare feet. Which I do all day long until I go outside with the dog. So no high heels/kitten heels, no flip flops, no bare feet. Geez!

I wear it as much as I can. At the lake, of course, I did not wear it while on the boat or in the water or on a beach. It has helped me a great deal which is wonderful. 
But it is difficult to go up and down the stairs in that thing. 
When I came home with this on Izzy wouldn't leave my side. 
I think she felt she was helping me. And she was in her own sweet way. 
The boot inflates so it really becomes a compression which feels rather good. 
But I want it off sooner than later. It is really feeling so much better. 

 Everyone always asks me if the lake is clean. Here is a photo of the lake I took from the boat. Looks good to me. (Yes, with my long lens.)

 

 Here is Izzy's summer vacation.  (Ours will be later in the week.)

After a day of swimming, this is what she did below. We, adults, did too. Honestly, she just wants to be in the water. 

At 5am she would wake us with her water toy (bumper)in her mouth and want to go down to the lake. 

It pained us all to wait until daylight. 

 She just won't come into the house after swimming. She sits on the porch and stares at us but won't go inside. Silly girl. This is her way of telling us she was not ready to be inside.

 These two need to get a room. She swam to him. Puts her back legs on his thighs and her front paws on his arm and she just relaxes a bit. 

It's pretty funny to witness.

She did so much of this below that is why she was so tired.

If I ran back and forth swimming or running in sand for 4 hrs a day I would collapse too. I probably wouldn't need to lose weight either. The vet said she was in such good shape and her leg muscles were beautiful. 

Good, now fix the poor girls liver.  

And lastly, this is her 2nd favorite thing. Going Fishing with Rick. 

She makes noises when she sees the fish and gets oh so upset when he loses the fish. She will grunt and growl at him as if to say, "you damn fool you lost the fish!"

It's crazy busy here today. I started this at 7:30am. It's now after 11AM. 

Fill you in on our vacation when I get out from under all this damn work!

First Day of Vacation

Friday, August 31st at 10:15am as we were headed to the lake.

The officer asked if there was a reason Rick was driving over the speed limit.

We both laughed, the cop put his head into the window and Rick asked, "Is there a good answer to that question?"  

The policeman laughed too and said, "well there could be a medical emergency or something like that"

Rick said, "No, just in a hurry to relax"

That made the smiling policeman laugh. 

Unfortunately this did not prevent us from getting a huge ticket.

As Sammy says, "I can't drive 55!!"

Water, Mountains, Rick and Izzy = Nirvana

Mute this one.

Friday and I'm out of here....

Today we are driving to the land of water and mountains so I am bringing you back to 2013. (7 glorious days away from this office!!)

This post was about having all my fitting's on the dress for my step-daughters wedding. I still have the dress, 
The stepdaughter no longer has the husband. 
Yep, it's been less than 5 years. 

I was recently told by a friend that she was reminded of this post when she was being fitted for her mother of the bride dress and she prayed this woman was not going to fondle her breasts with her cold hands as she did mine. So since it was fresh in my mind I thought I'd repost for the newbies while I am gone today.

So here you go.
Girl Angst - Men look away

Here is the final product of the dress.

Not sure either of these shows it well. don't have any photos. I make every attempt to avoid the camera at all costs. 

Notes

Sometimes something funny happens around these parts and I write them down on my phone app that looks like a tablet. 
If we are laughing in the evening and I grab my phone Rick will say, "this is going to be blog fodder isn't it?" 
Yep!  He knows I write about it, but he doesn't read my blog. 

Once when out with some others I grabbed my phone and under the table wrote what this crazy lady said so I would get the line correctly and not forget. Rick knew what I was doing. No one asked because people are always looking at their phones. Later on the way home, Rick said, "you wanted to get down what L said so you could write about it didn't you?" 
I said yes I did that. I thought he was going to tell me how awful I was but instead, he said, "good because no one would believe that shit."

So this weekend something funny happened and he said, "What? you aren't writing this down? Not making me repeat what I said?" 
Nope, this is not blog fodder, this would offend. This is just for we sickos.  
He laughed and said I think that is a good call.

Someone asked once how I remember all this stuff. I couldn't if I didn't write it down most times.  I will usually write it down when it's happening or shortly thereafter. Yes, I have a sickness like that. 

So imagine how this situation bugged us.
Rick made me laugh so hard that I lost my beverage.
It was like how in grade school your milk went everywhere.
He and I laughed so hard my belly hurt.
The next day neither of us could remember what the hell was so funny.
So, we laughed.

I told this to a former co-worker named Joe. He laughed and said, "Hell Paula and I do that all the time. The worst was 30 minutes later we couldn't remember what the hell was so funny."  Well that made me feel a bit better....slightly. But we are roughly the same age.

Welcome to being old.
Every day is a new day even if it's not. 
😍

---------------------------------
Yesterday Rick sent me this picture of something he found funny as he was driving. I could only see that it said Free Range Cock and I couldn't imagine what that could be. Figures he'd find this sign.
But as I looked closer it actually says Free Range Cocktails.
Don't know what the hell that could be either. Any guesses?

Vermont Bound

As I have shared here from time to time and most recently after my ex-husband died how much I love his family.

We have kept in touch for the past 35 years since my divorce in 1983. 

His brother Steve, lives an 1.5 hrs south from me so we get together annually and meet for dinner or they have come to our home for an evening. 

Of course, his mom and I talk quarterly or more for the past 35 years.

My ex's youngest brother, Chris, was 10 years younger so I never spent as much time with him. Oh, he loved to tease me something fierce. When I was 17 and going to their house after school they had a cat named Snoopy. I am petrified of cats, so of course, Chris would torment me to make me cry. In our 20's we saw less of him due to the age difference.

Chris was a dorky looking kid who turned into a model. My goodness is he handsome. Tall, broad, blonde with chiseled features. Even Rick said, boy the photos I've seen of him were goofy looking, he sure is handsome now. That made me giggle.

Now that 10 years age difference doesn't seem that big of a deal.

I met his wife when I lived in my hometown. They were just engaged. We connected right away. Gina was with Betty and they came to visit me one sunny afternoon. I liked her immediately. When Betty told me she wrote a book I went to Amazon and bought it. Ooh I didn't like it so I said nothing to anyone about the book until recently. I mentioned to Gina that I read her book and she said, "I'm sorry I will refund you the money, that book was horrific" 

I got an email from Gina recently thanking me for the card and things sent after Doc died. She kept saying his real name but it's hard for me to hear that name before the words, he died. His name is Rick. So it's weird to me. I prefer to call him by his nickname when talking to them. Or do as Betty does, she says, My Rick and Your Rick. That makes me smile, she's so cute.

Anyhoo, Gina wrote and asked if I would come for a visit.All would love to see me. I know this is odd to you but all of them talk about you all the time, even when Doc was alive. They love you and miss you, please consider it, and bring Your Rick. We would love it if you could make the trip."

I talked it over with my Rick and he said I would regret not going. He also said while he would love to go to Vermont in fall he thinks it best that I go alone. He thinks they will feel uncomfortable talking about Doc with me openly if he is there. Maybe he's right. Betty and Steve have spent a lot of time with My Rick so there is no issue there but perhaps he is right about this one.

So I am going to make this trip alone. I think I am going to drive. They were asking about pictures of this and that. I can't take all those photos on a plane. I think it would be about a 7- 8 hr trip. (southern VT) Drive up Friday leave Sunday.

Gina has been emailing and texting me like crazy. She wanted to surprise Betty but should one surprise an 80 something? 
I think she should tell her.

I'll leave it to her though, she knows best at this point.

So in about 6 weeks I'll be heading north for a very interesting weekend.

I'm a bit nervous. I haven't seen some of these folks since I was 27-31.

Can I get a facelift and lose 20lbs in 6 weeks? 

Blonde moments by Brunettes

We interrupt this program to bring you another blonde moment by Peg.

I do crack myself up. Hey if I don't laugh at myself and join all those laughing at me I'd just cry. I choose to laugh. This just took place.

I wear a wireless headset while at my desk. 
I prefer the model that goes over my head.
I walked Izzy at lunch as I do and did not realize until I saw someone I knew and they asked me if I was on the phone. 
I was thinking, "Gee I'm not holding a phone what a dumb question."  
Then she pointed to my ear and I realized I was still wearing my damn headset. It's been a full 40 minutes I have been walking Izzy. OMG.
How many other people pointed and giggled at me that I've seen?
Another blonde moment brought to you by this crazy brunette.

Wet T-Shirt

Yesterday was 92 degrees and they were talking about the horrific heat index of 105. It was hot and humid and icky. Yes, that is my professional term, icky.

Rick went to a home and they did not have the air conditioning on.
WHAT? They had the windows closed as well. 

I googled the address to see if this was a small older home.
Nope, it's listed as $993,434. So not old or small.

You never know one's circumstances. 
Perhaps they are broke and can't turn on the air. 
Perhaps because they are from a continent of extreme heat this is no big deal to them. Perhaps.

But with the Mercedes in the driveway and the Landrover in the garage, I would venture a guess that money isn't the issue.  Maybe they just wanted to torture the guy coming to their home. If so it worked. He was so miserable. He called me when he got into his van. He said the air was blasting on him. He wanted it to be nipple hard cold. Good luck with that Ricky. 

Rick took a photo of how wet his shirt was and text it to me.
It's that time of year where he brings a clean shirt with him in the morning.
You can't walk into your next appointment looking like a drowned rat.
He said a wet t-shirt is not a good look for him, it shows off his belly.
I told him to be proud, he worked hard for it. 

So he put on new deodorant, clean t-shirt and off to the next job.

P.S. Paul we still can't get to your blog even with the link you gave me that worked before.

Blogger at it Again

I am not getting email notifications when someone has commented -again.
I went in and did the same thing to the settings as last time but it is not working.
Aargh! If anyone has an answer I would appreciate it if you can share.

I had a wonderful weekend.
Saturday we brought the dog to daycare and little did she know she was spending the night. yippee for the humans!

We went to see Keb Mo in concert. It was a wonderful show. 
Just the man on a stool singing and playing his guitar. It was great!
The venue opens at 5pm. We got there at 4:45pm. 
The line was very long. They let us in at precisely 5pm
You go to the box office and get a number just like at the deli.

Then you go into a huge room of tables and a bar along with a store to buy the goodies from the show. T-shirts and the like.
Rick went to stand in line to get us a bottle of red. 
A glass is $9 or a bottle at $29. 
2 glasses a piece is more than a bottle so what the hell.

I went to a bar table and asked the man if anyone was sitting there.
Apparently, he was blind and told me I could sit there because it was saved for pretty women. Oh please.
The old coot had a book so you'd have thought he'd open it.
But he talked my ear off the moment my butt hit the chair.
Even after Rick came and sat down with the bottle and glasses he just kept talking. Rick kicked me under the table.
I dared not look at him or I'd laugh I just knew it. 

I didn't want to be rude but he wouldn't stop talking. He's an economist you know. He told me that several times.  Finally, his friends arrived. Whew. He got up and left the table. I do seem to attract these goofy people. Rick says I have a sign over me that says I am friendly and that I'll be nice to everybody. But what the hell was I to do? Tell him to shut up? I couldn't do that. But I didn't encourage conversation either. I just nodded a lot. When Rick was ribbing me about this later I said, "you know he could live alone and this was a conversation he needed to have. He may not have had human contact all week."  He did tell me he lived alone without me asking. Rick just shakes his head at me. But ya'll would have done the same, wouldn't you? He seemed to be a harmless old man.

They began to call the numbers at 5:45p. We got up to the gentleman and Rick gave him our number and I showed him our tickets on my phone. Then we go inside and find a table. This is dinner and drinks. 
We ate before we left because I know there is nothing at this kind of place that I can eat. So while those at our table ate things that smelled so yummy, we drank our wine. Then the show starts at 7:30p.

It was perfection. 
After the show, we left Alexandria and headed back out to our place.
We stopped at our favorite neighborhood haunt and bellied up to the bar. 
We had a cappuccino and dessert. This little Italian joint has the best cappuccinos I have ever had. The machine takes up 1/4 of the bar and I bet it is quite expensive. But I'd make room for it if I could afford such a luxury and have one of these cappuccinos every day. Mmm.....
They also have a flourless chocolate cake and a rum cake that Rick loves. So we enjoyed our late night dessert and coffee.
They close at 11pm and we left at 10:58 along with all the diners in the restaurant. Perfect end to a perfect evening.

We knew that we couldn't leave Izzy for that long. Nor did we wish to hurry back. But the best part was that we could sleep in past 5am. 
Or so we thought. 
At exactly 5AM I was awake. I looked at the clock and thought NOooo.  
Rick rolled over and said, "you too?" 
I mumbled I am making myself go back to sleep. And we did for 1 hour.
Then we rolled over and were looking at one another and burst out laughing.
So it's time to get up. But I am not walking & I don't have to look good for public consumption. That is a vacation right there.

We made coffee and went out on our patio and sat on the sofa and enjoyed the morning.  It was so nice to be lazy. It was a beautiful morning as well. Look I love that fur baby but I admit not being up at 5am with someone who is so damn happy and excited to see the world was rather nice. I'll get there but for the love of God, not at 5am.

We got to wake up slowly. We sat on that outdoor sofa and just had a mellow morning. I didn't even mind those annoying birds chirping. 
At 8:30am I made a quick breakfast outside on the grill. We sat outside and ate our breakfast with another cup of coffee when the young neighbor on the left came outside - I heard his door open and I looked over. 
He yelled to his wife so we could hear him -
"don't come out here they are doing it again!"    
We laughed. He said good morning and said, "I'm heading to McDonald's for breakfast and I walk out to this wonderful smelling bacon and breakfast again You guys kill me". 
Rick told them they need to get up earlier and join us. They normally sleep in until 11am and stay up way past the hour we old folks go to bed. 
He said the dog got him up this morning and they couldn't go back to sleep. We knew when we got home they had company on the deck. We heard them laughing from our bedroom. So they were up far later than we old coots.

Then last night I broke this tool thingy of Rick's that was in the kitchen.
Oops. I showed him what I did. Oh, he was not happy. He was grumbling.
I know how he is about his tools. He was muttering and trying to put this back together. Then he looked up and said, "Oh Honestly Margaret!" with such frustration.
I said, "I know, I know, why do you even put up with me?"
"Because you make me laugh."

Good answer, good answer buddy.

Friday

Linda deV - your comment was read out loud to Rick, "When you're done with him, please pass him on"

Well, that got the old fart going.
First, he asks who you are and where does she live?
I say all I know is she is younger than me and she lives in California.
He responds with, "Gee I can move this along, does she have beachfront property? If she does I am sure I can move this along very quickly."
Nice.

Then later he asked, "you know you could get lost while on vacation and I would have no way of reaching her, do you have her phone number?"

Okay, Mr. Sensitive. Laugh it up big boy, it's in print. You're going down if I get lost on vacation!

You sure you want this Linda? 

Then he moved on to the woman who asked for him specifically for work.
You see this woman called me and said I must have Rick insert last name.
I laughed and asked if she knew him.
She said he did my friends tub and tile and I saw it and I want the same thing done. Then she actually said, "I don't care how long I have to wait but I want the same man, Rick insert last name." 

She kept saying his full name and it was making me giggle. I did not share with Rick that I thought she was probably 80. Hey, I can play mean wife too you know.  Instead, when speaking about her to Rick I just would refer to her as his girlfriend. 

I need to have Rick xxxx, be sure it's Rick xxx etc.
So yesterday afternoon he went to see his girlfriend.
When he got to her door she opened and said "Ooh Ooh, you must be Rick last name. I'm delighted to finally meet you." 
Oh my, she's all aquiver to see my Big Guy.

He texts me to say that it sure was nice to have someone so excited to see him. Yeah, yeah, well I see you every day, the dog gets excited what more do ya want?

He said that his girlfriend kept saying his full name and it was making him laugh too. Rick said she was as cute as a button and from the Jean Nate crowd. 

Well, that made me chuckle. The "Jean Nate" crowd. 
I then knew she was much older.  When he got home he showed me the cookies she baked while he was there and she nicely wrapped them in foil for him to take home. He said she was 80 if she was a day. Sweet as could be. She tried to tip him but he wouldn't take it but he did indeed take "her cookies"  (Yea, I'm a pig)

It's nice when there are nice customers. They are so rare, we must appreciate them!  He did do a few things and not charge her, like a free non-slip bottom on her bathtub so she didn't fall and she asked for him to remove her grab bar and reinstall it somewhere else. 
He did all that for free...or cookies. 
He said the same thing to me, someone nice is so rare that I would have cleaned her gutters. 
I replied, "I sure hope you meant the ones on the roof and that wasn't a euphemism for something else."

One week from today I will be on the water, looking at the mountains with Izzy and Rick. 
If I don't come back you'll know that he lost me on purpose and he will be looking for Linda.😕

Big Butts

Remember that crazy ass woman who told me she was so important?

Well, Rick went there today to see what her issue was.
We had done her tub, tile walls & sink back in 2017. Gary did it all.
She said there was a crack in the tub. She also said she had a chip, but nothing fell. Okay then, let's see.

He got there and the crack was a hair. How long was that there that it has not moved? Does she not clean or use the tub? It was all so odd. Or was she looking to have Gary come back? I mean the girls always asked about him so maybe that was it. Who the hell knows.

The chip was a dust speck that had embedded while curing. Rick took a very fine sandpaper and like a snap of the fingers, it was gone. He asked her to touch it and see if it was okay. She said it was. But the point is it had to have been there since 2017 and now she just noticed it and it was important to come immediately because she is important damn it.

He called me when he left her house just to tell me she had a fake ass. 
I laughed and asked him, "What in the hell is a fake ass?"  
He told me it was one that God certainly did not make.
He said it was ENORMOUS and not even. God, he had me laughing. 
I told him to start at the beginning, please.

He said she met him at the door and she had such an air about her.
I interrupted and said, "Like she's important?"
He laughed and said, "Exactly. In her mind, she is very important."
She then walked me to the bathroom and Margaret you could not miss this butt.  It was HUGE. 
Kardashian huge and I think probably bigger. But it was not done evenly. 
I again interrupted and said, "my God you got a good look there Ricky didn't you?"
He said, "It was a freak of nature and I couldn't take my eyes off it. 
It was so damn huge and uneven and weird."
I asked how it was uneven. As he began to describe this big feature I couldn't stop laughing. 
He ended our conversation with," and by the way, if she's so important why can't her hairdresser fit her in to get her roots done?"

Ok, this is why I love the guy. He was a snarky bitch right there. 
Apparently, she had straw-like blonde hair (his words people) and black roots.
So she did not make a better impression on Rick than she did to me.  
I hope she loses our number.
He was there for a total of 15 minutes. But enough to share with you. 
Nice eh?