About Face

I went to see a physician for some work to be done on my face.
No not a facelift or injections. Sadly I can't afford that, but some laser work to remove these brown spots all over my damn face. 

I so hate these spots. I had 2 aunts that had them. Horrible and ugly spots. One is so dark it looks black. It is hidden in my eyebrow thank goodness.

My dermatologist tried with cream then suggested that I needed to see this person for BBL. (like IPL only stronger)

I arrived 15 minutes early because I am not familiar with this particular city. She was eating her soup at her desk.  She put on her mask and told me to just come into her office. If I didn't mind her eating her cup of soup we can chat in her office. Man, did she have the most beautiful skin but then if that is your business you damn well should right? 

She was wearing a mask and I wondered how the hell she was going to eat that styrofoam cup of soup but I did not ask.  I sat at the chair in front of her desk. She moved to the far corner and asked if I minded if she ate this. She was a good 8ft away. She told me she has been fully vaccinated. I said I was as well. She said, "great" and took off her mask and asked me questions as she ate and I wore a mask. 

Then she asked me to remove it to see some of this. I have to tell you it felt weird and scary as hell to remove my mask. I know with both of us having been vaccinated that it is unnecessary to be wearing a mask. This made me realize that I now have an issue to deal with as far as my mask. 

When she was done looking over these ugly spots I put it back on and she laughed. She said to me, "it's scary, isn't it? We know this protects us and now even vaccinated we can't remove them mentally just yet"

Exactly! She understood me but that didn't make me feel less silly but I kept it on anyway.

I came home and told Rick how incredibly uncomfortable it made me feel. 

I know psychologically this is my issue that I must overcome. I can't even fathom going somewhere to be around a crowd or to go to a restaurant. I fear it. I can still get sick and I really don't wish to or worse cause Rick to be sick because his lungs are not in great shape as well as his kidney function.  I will never have my old normal back, will I?  I just need to adjust to this new life. It may take me more time than I thought.

Speaking of work on one's face.

Rick has a lovely sister. She is very pretty. She is lovely inside as well.

She lives in CA where everyone is required to change their face and bodies I swear. She had what she told us was her nose and eyes done. I'd say her whole face. Rick sent me a photo and said, "guess who this is" I said I don't wish to play this game, just tell me, please. He told me. You could have knocked me off my chair with a feather. She looks nothing like herself. A totally different person.

She used to look like Rick. She doesn't any longer. She is beautiful no doubt. She was beautiful before she did this. I think if you have the disposable income to do this you should be able to. But I find it so weird to have a whole new face. While I may not have been given the same gifts of say, Charlize Theron, it is still my face. I can't fathom having one face for 50 plus years and then poof - new face. Not that I wouldn't like the new face but it's not me. Is that making sense to you?

The bottom line, she is healthy and well. 

She was gorgeous before and she is gorgeous now. Just different. 

If she walked past Rick or me we would never recognize her. 

That is what I find odd, not that she did it. I give her kudos. I would do work on my face if I could. I just don't want a different face so I doubt I would cut my face but I'd do other things if I could afford it. 

But she looks fabulous and she feels fabulous and that is most important.

Not that I wouldn't want a new face but I've had this ugly one for a long time and I'm used to it. It would be odd walking by a mirror with another face don't you think? While Rick feels the same, of course, he has to take the street paved in perversion when he said to me, "Well it's like after all these years he's got a new woman in bed"  

Seriously my man is a sicko.