Yoga

I have been trying to stretch more. 
I don't know if it is old age shit or just sitting at my desk and only walking for exercise that my hamstrings are so tight for one. 
I am just feeling like I need to stretch as odd as that may sound. 

Because of all this stretching I am trying to do at home I was happy to see a post on our local community facebook page for a yoga class for all levels from beginners to seniors and everything in between. Okay, I fall into a couple of those categories and looked into it further.

Imagine my surprise when I saw that my husband did the same thing.  He just signed up on facebook.  He came to my office and said, "I think I'd like to go to a new yoga class here starting next week."  I laughed and told him I just saw that on FB.  He said, "were you reading that too? Wanna go with me?" 

So tomorrow is our first night at yoga. I will not make the same mistake as last time and stand next to him. Oh no, he makes me laugh and there is no laughing in Yoga.  It's Wednesday evenings to get my stretch on.
I can't fathom liking this. But I know I need this. I love pilates but there just isn't anywhere around here. I can't even think that my leg will go over around my neck unless I am in a car accident and end up twisted that way. 
But voluntarily do that?
Ha, that is funny.

The last time I did this with Rick I quit after 1 class. Rick absolutely loved it.
But after many months, the class could no longer take place in the building they were using and there were no more classes around here. 
He loved it so much he suggested I go with him.
I did and this is why I know I can't be near him in my new class.

The woman in front of us was very "farty" Rick was making comments that made me laugh. Such as, sniff sniff "Oh she had chinese food earlier today." 
I mean c'mon who says that when you are meditating? 
Sick bastard makes me laugh.
I tried to stifle them but c'mon the guy is funny to me and only to me but that is the problem.  I don't understand why everyone gets farty in yoga. Thankfully that didn't happen to me but it may. Who knows. What is this phenomenon?

At that first class I went to with Rick we were on our backs and we were to turn to our left with our right foot and hand. I was now staring at Rick. 
He smiles and says, "your other left Margaret."
And of course being the giggler I am, I laughed. Okay, it was one of my many blonde moments.  BUT this time, the yoga master was behind me and said, "No laughing in yoga!"  That made me laugh all the harder.  Why are things funny when you aren't supposed to laugh?

The last thing that happened that sent us over the edge was a woman in front of us and to Rick's left that had on a very thin pair of leggings.  
You could see she had no underwear on. But that was only half of it. 
Her see-through yoga pants were ripped at the crack of her ass. 
I knew she'd want to know but I couldn't tell her or the Yogi would yell at me again for talking in class. 

Now come on girls, if your ass was showing wouldn't you want someone to tell you this? Especially if your ass is in the air all the time.
Rick whispered to me, go tell her I can't tell her. At that moment, she farted.
We laughed so hard that we had to leave the room and we did not go back in there. I felt bad because she probably thought she did this to us. Well, she did, but it was the whole collective day of me going to the wrong side and all the damn farting. Can someone tell me why there is so much farting in Yoga, please?

The following week Rick went without me and the Yogi asked him if he could behave this week. He promised he would because no one was with him.

So as you can imagine tomorrow I will head to the back of the room and stand nowhere near him! It is a female yogi this time so she won't know me or the fact that I don't know my left from my right.  I will be certain to wear underwear and no ripped pants or shorts. I will not have gas and/or expel said gas in this room with other people.

We can laugh about everything in the class on the way home.