Me

I'm avoiding things that need to be done.  

I have become a procrastinator since retiring. It's odd.

When my sister was here, my husband had to share stories about his wife's blonde moments, as he calls them. One of them is coming up.

I sure didn't think it was funny when it was happening, but I sure do now.

We were visiting Seattle, knowing we were about to move there.

We were dealing with all kinds of shocking discoveries, like how the women were hairy.  Sure, it only bothered me, but as I said to Rick, I will move here, but I will continue with hair removal. 

On one of the days there, we were not able to get into our hotel. It was blocked off with yellow tape and all these police and people in hazmat suits. The office told us that when we came back later, we should be able to get to our room.

It was a meth lab taking place in the hotel bathrooms. Guess we could have all blown up. We had never seen anything like this except on TV, so this was a weird day for us.

We went to get lunch at Red Robin. At the time, I had never been to a Red Robin before. As we were waiting for our beverages, I saw a placard on the table that said Cinco de Mayo.  

Again, this is 1993, and I had not heard of Cinco de Mayo. I know, hard to believe!

So knowing my grade school Spanish, I say to Rick, "What the hell is the 5th of mayonnaise?"  

Well, Mr. Rick about choked on his Pepsi. I got indignant. Why are you laughing at me all the time, I asked.  I know cinco is 5 in Spanish. Mayo?  

So what is the 5th of Mayonnaise, and why is this a big deal?

When Rick came up for air, he explained it to me. 

I felt like Emily Latella, on SNL, and just said, "Oh, never mind" with a sheepish grin, and boy did I feel like a Grade A ass.

So every 5th of May, my husband reminds me of this.

My little sister about peed her pants. 

They both decided that I have blonde moments to entertain them. Yes, that is why.

Well, at least I know it's my favorite day now, tacos and tequila are my favorite, so I will celebrate the 5th of Mayonnaise!

I've always been clumsy. Rick was also sharing with my sister of a time I was standing on the passenger side of his van. The window was open. I jumped through the window and twisted so I was sitting upright.  He said, "What the hell? How did you do that?"  I just did. 

You see, when I was young, I was flexible as all hell. I was a stupid high school cheerleader. I wore ankle weights and practiced jumping all damn day in my backyard. I could jump into a car, twist like on a trampoline, and sit upright. Flipped Rick out. Mostly because we were arguing and he wasn't getting away. LOL

Now, if I tried that, I'd hit the car door, fall backward, and probably get a concussion.  How the hell did this happen to me? 

I fell down the back steps of my childhood home, holding said sister. She was 4 or 5. I was pretending to throw her outside, and she was giggling up a storm. I lost my balance and went down the 4 steps. I covered her with my body, and only I hit the steps. She was giggling all the way down. 

Of course, the time I fell snow skiing and had to try out for cheerleading with a sprained ankle.  Another fall. So I have been playing all my falls over in my head. Accident-prone or something more?

In the meantime, I am going to wear only flat shoes. Which, I might add, I hate. 

So you can see I am clumsy. But of late, it has become worrisome.

I am falling a great deal. I get so dizzy. I walk into the kitchen and need to grab the island, or I'll fall. 

I mentioned this to my primary doctor, who is ready for maternity leave. I don't think her focus is where it should be. I list all the things going on, along with the falling.

She wants me to see a neurologist. Hmm.....

My husband put my symptoms into Dr. Google, and he has decided I have MS.

I don't think so.  My family has parkinsons but I have no tremor/s. So don't think it's that.

Oh well. 

I am sick to death of doctors. I am no longer in pain due to finding a good ortho, and my injections were put in the correct place. So I don't want to do this, but I think I may need to. Vertigo is probably all this is. But I don't know that they can do anything about that, can they? 

In the meantime, I will be paying bills today and sitting, so that should be safe. Baseball on the radio as I type this, and soon pay bills. If we win, it will be easier on the bill-paying job.😁

My Annual Cinco de Mayo Post

I've got a busy day. So I am reposting my Cinco de Mayo story.

As we woke up Rick looked at me and said, "Happy 5th of mayonnaise babe." He tried to kiss me but I held up a finger. You guess which one.

He never let's it go.

I appear to be here for his fodder. 

Thursday, May 6, 2021

5th of Mayonnaise.

What did you do for Cinco de Mayo?

I spent hours looking for this subject because I assumed I must have written about it, in fact I swear I did. But it can not be found.

I grew up in a small town. It was a very damn big deal when the restaurant Chi-Chi's came to town. Back when this happened there weren't a lot of food choices in town. No Thai, no Mexican, no BBQ etc. 

Chi-chi-s was my first introduction to Mexican food. Hard to even imagine today but this was many moons ago.

Everyone went to Chi-Chi's if for no other reason but to get a margarita and eat some chips and salsa. Authentic Mexican cuisine, I think not. 

But I did not know that then. It was all new to me. 

When I made the move to a bigger city I was exposed to so many more food choices. When I began working in the travel industry that helped expose to a lot of foods and people which I loved!

But this day we were visiting Seattle.

We arrived at a Red Robin for a quick lunch in Seattle. 

On all the tables there were little placards saying Cinco de Mayo.  

From 6th grade Spanish I knew Cinco was 5. 

But 5 of mayonnaise? I didn't get it. 

I kept reading the placard and Rick asks me what is so interesting. I say, like a fool, what the hell is the 5th of mayonnaise?

He looked at me and in all seriousness says, "Margaret, you die your hair brown don't you?"  I know that meant to him I'm being a dumb blonde.

Nope, being a dumb brunette!  

Again I ask, "well, what is the 5th of mayo? I don't get it."  

He is laughing like a fool. I was getting a bit perturbed by him. 

When he came up for air he told me it was The 5th of May. He went on,

"It is a Mexican celebration about a battle they won over the French empire he thinks in the 1800's.  So it is celebrated on the 5th of May. 

Mayo= May Margaret. The 5th of May" Not mayonnaise.

Okay, who feels like the fool now. So of course I too am laughing at myself. 

That was so many moons ago but Rick brings it up every year. If you know him you are saying to yourself as you read this, "why of course he does"

Yesterday he text me and said since it is the 5th of mayonnaise how about taco's for dinner and some margaritas. Of course, that sounds fine to me.

But just once I wish he'd forget that I ever said that. But he won't. 

Picking on me is a sport where he is MVP.

So what did you do on your 5th of Mayonnaise? 

5th of Mayonnaise.

What did you do for Cinco de Mayo?

I spent hours looking for this subject because I assumed I must have written about it, in fact I swear I did. But it can not be found.

I grew up in a small town. It was a very damn big deal when the restaurant Chi-Chi's came to town. Back when this happened there weren't a lot of food choices in town. No Thai, no Mexican, no BBQ etc. 

Chi-chi-s was my first introduction to Mexican food. Hard to even imagine today but this was many moons ago.

Everyone went to Chi-Chi's if for no other reason but to get a margarita and eat some chips and salsa. Authentic Mexican cuisine, I think not. 

But I did not know that then. It was all new to me. 

When I made the move to a bigger city I was exposed to so many more food choices. When I began working in the travel industry that helped expose to a lot of foods and people which I loved!

But this day we were visiting Seattle.

We arrived at a Red Robin for a quick lunch in Seattle. 

On all the tables there were little placards saying Cinco de Mayo.  

From 6th grade Spanish I knew Cinco was 5. 

But 5 of mayonnaise? I didn't get it. 

I kept reading the placard and Rick asks me what is so interesting. I say, like a fool, what the hell is the 5th of mayonnaise?

He looked at me and in all seriousness says, "Margaret, you die your hair brown don't you?"  I know that meant to him I'm being a dumb blonde.

Nope, being a dumb brunette!  

Again I ask, "well, what is the 5th of mayo? I don't get it."  

He is laughing like a fool. I was getting a bit perturbed by him. 

When he came up for air he told me it was The 5th of May. He went on,

"It is a Mexican celebration about a battle they won over the French empire he thinks in the 1800's.  So it is celebrated on the 5th of May. 

Mayo= May Margaret. The 5th of May" Not mayonnaise.

Okay, who feels like the fool now. So of course I too am laughing at myself. 

That was so many moons ago but Rick brings it up every year. If you know him you are saying to yourself as you read this, "why of course he does"

Yesterday he text me and said since it is the 5th of mayonnaise how about taco's for dinner and some margaritas. Of course, that sounds fine to me.

But just once I wish he'd forget that I ever said that. But he won't. 

Picking on me is a sport where he is MVP.

So what did you do on your 5th of Mayonnaise?