Smoke On The Water

Saturday, my 'alarm', better known as my bladder, went off at 4:50am.  

I tried to talk myself out of getting up. Don't think about it, I tell myself. 

That makes me think about it. 

I'm whining to myself, 'I don't wanna get up!' That is not helping.

My bladder won.  Honestly, I am beginning to dislike my parts and organs!  They just no longer function at the level to which I have become accustomed.   

My mechanic (Dr.) seems to think there is nothing wrong with me. 

But she is wrong.  

I digress - I got up and went into the hall bathroom so I didn't wake Rick.  Normally, I would not turn on the light.  There is a tiny light on the bottom of the receptacle cover in the bath, but it wasn't helping me.  

I couldn't seem to find the soap container/pump to wash my hands. 

No glasses, it's dark, I even laughed out loud.  Then I remembered I took it apart to clean it, and it is drying in the dish rack. I turned on the damn light. 

I got soap from under the sink. 

Well, now I am certainly awake. I might as well get up for the day.

Just as I entered the living room, there was an enormous boom that shook the house, and then the living room lit up like all the lights were on.

I ran to the window. I saw sparks and smoke across the street coming from one of the poles. At first, I thought all of this was caused by the street light, but then I realized it had to be the electrical pole. Just as I was about to turn from the window, the boom sound hit us again, and I saw the sparks fly this time from the pole to the ground. Then smoke.  I was wondering if all that heavy rain the night before was what was keeping this from catching fire.  

I looked up the number to call our electric company. I sure didn't think I should let this go.  Then another boom/strike. This time, the sparks and lights were like fireworks. Many more sparks were flying now, and for some reason, that concerned me. I hoped they didn't think I was crazy, but better crazy than cremated alive.

I got a voicemail from the electric company. They told me to leave a message.  This was the 24-hour emergency line. So much for emergency service. I did leave a message, but I figured I'd never hear back on a Saturday.

By this time, Rick is coming into the living room and says, "The bedroom is lighting up like crazy. Do you know what is going on?"  I point to the window.

He knelt on the sofa to look out the window, and boom!!  Rick jumped.  

He saw the sparks and the smoke on the ground.  

When I couldn't reach the electric company, I called 911 and said, "While this is not an emergency, I think it could be a fire in the making.  

I explained. Within minutes, a firetruck was outside our home, and just as they pulled up, another boom, the sky lit up, and sparks went off.  As they walked around the pole, sparks came flying down, and the firemen scattered. And here I was, worried it'd stop and they would think I was a prank call or something.

The firefighters did what they could and waited until the electric company arrived. They spoke to one another, the firemen left, and the linemen did their jobs.  They were here for 1.5 hours, but it's fixed. All of this was done before 7:00 a.m.

Because the heat dome left us, it was a nice morning. We were sitting on the porch, drinking our coffee and watching the linemen.  When they were done, one of them walked up our driveway just a few feet and yelled, "You are the ones that called, right?"

We said we were. He thanked us for calling and just turned around and walked back to his truck. Rick wanted to ask him all kinds of guy questions, but he didn't seem to want to talk. 

The two poles.

This is from the porch, showing the puddles and how wet it was. I still think that was good because that smoke scared me. But what do I know?!

Saturday afternoon, I stopped at the grocery store. Rick was out of his favorite cereal, which he refers to as Colon Blow.  Lovely isn't he?  

There was one box left on the shelf.  It was all the way in the back of the shelf.  

The shelf was a bit high. I went across the aisle to jump and see if there was a box in the back that I could not see. Yes, there was.  I looked both ways - no one was coming. So I tested the shelf.  Yep, it'll hold me. I began to climb when this cute red-headed freckled-faced boy, all of 13/14, said, "Here, let me help you, ma'am."

I thanked him a million times.  I asked if he was the superhero for old short ladies as his mom came around the corner. 

He laughed and said, "I guess I'm going to need a cape."  Cute, cute kid.

 

I'm normally like the girl in the pink sweatpants.  In fact, this is the exact shelf that Rick's cereal was on, and I had to reach all the way to the back. I couldn't reach it.  I jumped down, and that is when the kid saw me. 

Oh well. If I bring Rick, he can reach all those things up high. But if I bring Rick, the grocery bill will be double. No exaggeration!