I had a post queued up to post on Friday morning.
Late last night, I had the realization that some may clutch their pearls again since it was a tough subject. So I scratched that.
This has been a bit of my week.
1. My therapist told me that I joke too much. I think I need a new therapist.
He also told me to start to focus on me. Easier sad than done but I'm doing my homework.
2. Rick and I remembered a show we loved in Seattle. It was like SNL on Saturday nights at 11:30, and they showed SNL right after it.
We even got tickets to see the show live and sit in the audience. One of our favorite skits, and there were many, was the drive-through Mammograms.
It caught us so off guard that we laughed like crazy. Pull up in your car, pull up your blouse, they give you the once over with their eyes only and would say, "Gee, these look good - closer, yeah, okay, you're on your way - NEXT."
I don't know why, but it cracked us up. Hey, I'd do it, a helluva lot better than being squished like a pancake! We also found out that Joel McHale was on that show and was a writer while we were there. So apparently we saw him, but he wasn't "Joel McHale" then.
3. I have made more warm-weather foods and crockpot meals this week. It is brutally cold for us southerners. 13 degrees tonight. My favorites of the week were Zuppa Toscano and Beef Stew.
Now I want a week off from cooking. Thank God for leftovers and a man who will eat them!!
A while back, as you recall, they had me do 6 months of chemo with high dosage of steroids for the mass on my retina named Betty. After those months of chemo, my hair on my head grew back, but my eyelashes didn't.
I swear I've only got 5 lashes on each eye. It really bothers me. It's stupid and vain how much it bothers me and that bothers me. (see therapist)
Anyways -
The last 3 years have been all about Rick. I have not gotten myself anything in 3 years nor have I done anything for just me in 3 yrs. If it's a day out, I think about whether Rick can walk there. Can we do this?
So the ole therapist told me to work on myself. Be selfish without guilt.
I was raised with Italian Catholic Guilt. For those who don't know, it's neck and neck with Jewish Mom's Guilt. Selfish is not easy for me, but I'm doing my homework. I giggled today when I did something because it felt naughty. No guilt, just all about me.
So selfish Peg did something just for her. I got eyelashes. No, not extensions. I did do that many, many years ago when it became all the rage. They were falling onto my cheekbones as I drove home. I laughed and realized this is not for me. BUT I had eyelashes then. Now it's a different story.
I've had a gift card to Ulta for a very long time. I love Ulta and Sephora and stores like that. I could spend hours there. So I did just that.
I made an appointment at their Beauty Bar and was taught how to put on eyelashes. Fake Eyelashes.
She brought out all these big ole Cardi B eyelashes, and I would laugh and shake my head. Nope. I said, "Look, I'm a few months shy of 70. I want to look the best I can, but I don't wish to look like I'm 25. Nothing obviously fake. Just to fill in my bald spots."
So this young thing with the most perfect porcelain skin brought me back some eyelashes that I could live with. I chose the last ones she brought me. She did her tutorial, and I pray I can do this again.
You all know I don't take pictures of myself. I don't like the old face, but I did take a selfie...my 2nd one, you guys. You can see my eyelashes that she gave me. I think we chose wisely.
This is so not an everyday thing. I don't need them to run to Walmart or scrub my toilets. But when I am getting dressed up to go somewhere, I know I'll feel better with these.
Rick asked why I feel so guilty about wearing them. I don't have an answer to that, but a very interesting question. He said you wouldn't feel bad if you had to wear a hairpiece or wig after you lost your hair, would you?
He's right, I wouldn't. Ah, screw it.
With that attitude and attempting to do more for myself, I'm wearing them when I want and to hell with what anyone thinks. If nothing else the ole therapist will be very happy with me. Hey, I may wear them next visit.
They don't look too fake, do they?
36 comments:
Beautiful! They look so natural. And what a nice self-care action. I'd never guess they were add-ons! I'm 68 and I don't care for the rage of those youngsters with super elongated and clearly fake eyelashes! CindyP
That is what I was hoping to avoid Cindy. In all honesty, it surprised me how much not having many lashes bothered me.
Well, then that is a double-win for you! Extra benefit for the time you spent in Ulta finding the "right" fit. They really suit you. CindyP
They do not look fake at all. YOU LOOK FABULOUS! And yes, definitely wear them to show your therapist! And you know, self-care is NOT selfish. That's a harmful misconception that women are taught so that we will always keep putting others' needs ahead of our own.
Wowza - you look fabu! I love, love, love your hair (The color! The cut! I am so envious). The eyes have it - perfect. Hell, I even like your lipstick.
As for the joking - yes, it can be a defense mechanism - it's mine as well but I think it's also an indication of our basic personalities - we are basically happy people dealing with the unhappiness of life. You can't cry all the time.
Ah Grace we'll put. Basically happy people dealing with the unhappiness of life. Boy that resonates! As for hair color, thank Covid. I had nothing to do with it. Too cheap and lazy now to go back to coloring
You are beautiful my friend!
The eyelashes look great...and so do you. Did the sales lady show you the magnetic s kind? Some people say they are easier to put on.
Stop joking around?? It's part of your personality and as someone else said above, it's a defense tactic and sometimes if you didn't joke or laugh about something, you'll cry. Caregivers do it a lot, it gets you through some difficult situations.
People, especially professionals are always telling family caregivers to take time for themselves, but unless they've lived the life they don't understand the guilty and worry that can come from taking time away from a dependent spouse.
I misread your sentence as "I was raised Italian Catholic Guilt" minus the word "with" lol. I know this guilt and every year I sweep a little more out the door. Wear those eyelashes and be beautiful you and be happy.
Good for you!
Inside yes. Thank you Julie. I hate that I can't read you easily anymore. I'm old and confused. lol
Jean they did indeed but much more difficult for me. But there was a helluva lot of laughter let me tell you! As for caregiving I have not been sharing but this has been the most difficult 3 yrs of my life in so many different ways. Rick died on May 22 2022. The new person who emerged is so different and that too is difficult. Enough of my whining. Thx and yes joking is my way so I want to tell him to bite it.
Well now that is a whole new meaning without the word "with" LOL. I"m working on the happy DB!
Thx Kathy!
Thx. I just don't want to be that gal with the spiders on her eyes. You know what I mean. I've been putting people before me since 1966, it's a hard habit to break but I'm trying like hell.
Gorgeous!
I was reading this, and thinking to myself, "Dang, too bad Peggy doesn't do selfies, because I wanna see." Then I got to the end. Thank you!
What about Hans Wiemann?
I think they look fantastic. And if they make you feel as good as you look dang its a win. I've lost a great deal of hair that sadly has not returned so I totally get it.
The eyelashes look natural to me. Regarding guilt, I have lots of it. Not Jewish, Italian or Catholic. My background was Evangenital Christian... guilt for being a female person is hard wired.
You're welcome. 😉
Hair club? funny boy
Paula, yes a woman's hair is her crown and it's a big deal!!
Yeah! Now fingers crossed I can put them on myself next week. LOL
"Evangenital" you're funny.
did you get the email to join? I might just make it public again idk
Those look really good--very natural. And your hair is fabulous!
Gee thx re: my hair. My hair gives me a lot of stress. 🙂 I really wanted to find something that didnt look fake but gave me confidence when I got dressed to go out and about. ☺️
Peg--You are just now letting me know how beautiful you are? (Or...have I been asleep at the switch?) You (and your lashes) look absolutely beautiful. (I ask because I am curious: are the lower lashes a part of the set?)
I have no lashes, but they aren't bothersome to me. Anyone have an instant turkey-neck fix?
Cop, ok I am so uncomfortable with these comments. Just the lashes folks. I don't post pictures of me but I was so excited about this silly event I took one for my sister and then thought id share with you all. Thk you for the kind words..
The bottom lashes are mine. Only fake on top.
I'm looking for that turkey neck fix myself! Upper arm bat wing fix, eye bags fix, etc!
You look beautiful Peg.
Cruisin Paul
Hi Peggy, Those lashes look natural, as if you had put some mascara on. And, as others have said, your hair looks fabulous! I was listening to a podcast the other day and the gyn said that she takes prescription spironolactone for her hair loss-supposedly also helps with eyelashes. Spironolactone was originally a blood pressure lowering medication and the incidental side effect was hair growth.
You had a post several months ago that I always meant to respond to but didn’t regarding our super powers. Your super power, in my opinion, has been / is to write about situations and put the fun/ny spin on it, so that we, the readers, smile/chuckle, and laugh or cry along with you. Your super power is writing about life (and very possibly living your life) and making it interesting, whether it’s with humor OR pathos. I love reading your blog voice. Hugs to you. Good on you to put your air mask on first, finally.
And you think your discomfort will stop us? *laughing*
I am reminded of a friend from work (instant friends when he learned I used a bird book written by his youngest son) with whom I occasionally had lunch after his retirement. He kept me abreast of what was happening with his wife and sons, of whom he was justifiably proud. It was only at his funeral that it occurred to me that I had no idea what his wife looked like. It had never occurred to HIM to tell me that she was drop-dead gorgeous.
I am happy to see you ; )
They look terrific, Peg, wear them with pride! You look wonderful! Geez, the way you've been describing yourself, I was expecting a witch out of a Halloween cartoon. Listen to your therapist and do some things nice for yourself. There is zero shame in that.
And I think you should run your censored post. You're retired, you can say what you want and everyone else can go to hell!
The lashes look perfect. I can understand how losing your lashes might bother you. After a lifetime of long, thick hair, the top of my head is very, and I mean very, thin. I found a powder that you put on your scalp with a little puff, and it covers the old lady's pink scalp. I don't use it all that often, but I like knowing I have it when I want.
I think they look great! I have been using lashes I glue on myself for a couple of years. Otherwise my eyes are so unremarkable and small. But with the lashes, I feel so much better. Like you I don't wear them unless I'm going out.
They look fabulous! and so do you. I'm a new reader of your blog, came to it via DBS's blog list. You're witty and funny and that's what I like. -Kate
Well hello Stubblejumpers, Thanks for stopping by. I'll try not to disappoint.
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