My dog sat at the front door with her deflated football in her mouth until I returned.
I pulled up in front of my house and as I walked to the door I saw her. Her tail wagging and she was grunting and groaning as she does when she misses us. I was just with her for 23 of the last 24 hrs so this makes me laugh. But I love every minute of it. She wiggles her butt and her tail rapidly and she is lovin' on me and I can't even get in the house. Don't you wish everyone greeted you like that every day?
My chubba wubba waiting on me.
I have a big issue with the lack of phone and social skills in the world today. My father blames this all on technology. That could be a part of it, mostly I think it was how you were raised.
Grown ass men call and can't articulate a thought. I wonder what the hell they do for a living that they can't do this? How do you have a job where you can't speak with people and make a point? It's much worse with men than women but they aren't off the hook either.
So let's recap what a person should know to do when calling a business.
1. Say hello.
2. Explain what you are looking for, looking to be done etc.
3. Then shut up and let the person answer your questions.(men can not do this number 3 at all)
4. When you are done, say thank you and good bye. Social skills.
Sounds easy enough doesn't it? I get one call a day when those things happen.
Yesterday it was a full day of idiots.One after another.
I swore there was a sign somewhere to call me and to act stupid.
I had someone call that went like this.
Person on the phone who was a full grown up adult male: "Hey."
Me: " Hello can I help you."
Caller: "I don't know."
Me: What are you looking for sir?"
Caller: "2 things"
Long silence.
Me: "Would you like to share with me what those 2 things are so I may help you?" I chuckle.
Caller:" my bathroom and my kitchen." he is not laughing
Me: "Are you looking to have your tub and tile refinished in your bath?"
Caller: "No."
Me: "Okay let's start with the bathroom. What are you looking to do?"
Caller: "I'm not sure"
MY HEAD EXPLODES.
Me: "Do you just want your tub to be refinished?"
Caller: "I think so."
OMG.
Me: Why did you call? What are the issues that you think need repaired so I can help you sir?"
Caller: Well I don't know that is why I called you.
OMG!
Me: do you want the tub refinished? Do your tiles need refinished? or do you even WANT them refnished?
Caller: No.
Me: NO to all of that or just the tiles?
Caller: the tiles.
OMG CAN YOU FUCKING PUT A SENTENCE TOGETHER YOU NUMBNUT?
Me: Okay is this a standard 5' tub or a claw foot? jacuzzi tub? soaking tub?
Caller - I think it's standard.
I go through what makes a standard and quote a price and go through all the shit of warranty, time frame etc.
Me: What did you need for your kitchen, new countertops?
Caller: I don't know for sure, maybe my wife should call.
O.M.G ya think?
Me: That would be great, have her call me and I can walk her through everything and if we are doing count tops we can set up a time that a person can come out show samples and go over everything with her.That would be a free estimate.
Caller: Does that cost us something?
Me: The estimate is free.(argh!)
Caller: But you will charge me to refinish my bathtub right?
I'm thinking, is he stupid, is he trying to be funny?
Me: Oh we will still charge you to refinish your bathtub.
Caller: okay
And he just hung up. No thank you, no "see ya" just hung up.
Now when I tell these things to Rick upon hanging up he swears the insane or mentally challenge call me. Nope, just your typical DC Metro customer. Those that are highly paid and highly educated but are so socially inept it is scary. This actually happened when Rick was here, he was looking at me with his head cocked and I made the international sign to write down what I was saying so could blog it. That is how sick I am. I thought you could enjoy some of my daily pain.
Is it wrong that I want to drink every day after work?
Is it wrong that after work I never want to answer my personal phone?
10 comments:
I can hear the conversation with his wife that night. Wife - Did you call? Him - Yeah but they couldn't tell me anything.
Gawwwwd, you're funny. Stupidity serum has been put in the drinking water. I swear it. The terrorists have won.
Love your doggie. Aren't they just the best. How does anyone live without a fur-baby?
Mike - sadly that is probably too correct.
Jayne - sadly I don't try to be funny my life could just be sit com some days. Between my crazy ass family and customers I get a lot of blog material.
Izzy communicates much better... at least you KNOW what she's trying to say and she doesn't have to SAY A WORD!
Oh Cora that made me laugh. You're right, she does communicate better!!
I get weird stuff all the time too. Then you get the ones you can't get off the phone because they keep talking. Ok ok ok
Good Lord! Couple phone calls like that in the morning and I wouldn't be surprised to see you drinking for lunch.
Brian, the saddest thing is this is constant all damn day ,every day. Yesterday was so bad I told rick I needed a morphine drip at my desk. That would chill me out.I bite my tongue all day hence why I blog and bitch. :-)
ok, i got a solution for ya, because i am full of good ideas:
next time one of these bozos calls, tell him to go into the room he's thinking of and stand there with his eyes squeezed tight shut and think REAL HARD abotu what the room looks like until you call him back.
and then an hour later call him back and tell him his whole room needs the most expensive treatment you have.
flask while I love the idea of that, it would make for bad business and bad reviews.
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