Thursday, February 27, 2014

Holder of the Purse Strings

Because we have had debit card fraud I am now paranoid.
I check our accounts with a fine tooth comb. That is how I found the fraud and was able to be on it quickly before more money was taken. Nothing makes you feel so awful as that whole scenario of people taking your money.

But this practice drives my husband nuts. I see everything he buys. I knew that he bought me something at Christmas when we don't buy Christmas gifts for one another. I always know what he's up to. 

Last night he said, "How the hell am I to buy you a birthday gift without you knowing what it is?"
Poor thing, I didn't have the heart to tell him I always know, with one exception, what he buys me.  I don't need to look at the bank info, he makes things pretty transparent. But I went along with him.

I just said, " Rick just take money out of the ATM and I won't know what you are using it for?"

"You don't think you'll ask me if I took money out."

"Of course I will but I promise not to ask you what for since my birthday is around the corner."

"Uh-huh, not sure I'm buying that Margaret."

Okay I'll make you a deal. I will not ask, but if I don't get a gift that matches the money I will assume your girlfriend got it and I sure am not letting that go without saying something."

He laughed so hard his cocktail flew out of his mouth.

11 or more years ago was the one and only time he really surprised me.
I used to say I wanted a rock before we were married. 
I told him I wanted it big and simple, like my men.
But in all seriousness I didn't care. I wasn't getting married for the jewelry.
We choose matching bands. I did not get an engagement ring.
I love bracelets, watches and rings. Just my thing.
I would put pictures of those things in his jewelry box and when he'd get his watch or cuff links for work he'd see these things. He would laugh and show me and say, "fan mail from some flounder?"  For you young 'ens that is from the Bullwinkle show I believe. 

For years I had a photo of an anniversary ring that was gold with 3 stones  and platinum prongs. It was our joke. I did this since the 80's so it wasn't what I ever really thought would happen. It was just our little joke.  Never in a million years thinking I'd get this huge thing.
(well huge to me, i guess that is relative)

When he was VP of HR he got yearly bonuses. If he reached certain "goals" he was rewarded. One year he came home and told me he didn't get his bonus. I was livid. 
I ranted on and on about "how could they do that to you?" Did others get theirs?  Did you say anything? and on and on. I bitched about this for weeks. But in the mean time he got the bonus and since I see the money come and go he didn't put it in our bank.  Instead he bought me this gorgeous rock of a ring in cash to hide it from me. 

The morning of my birthday he gave me what I really wanted.  He can never wait to a decent hour, no I'm awake and he must give me my gifts. 
New bathrobe, these tempur pedic sleepers I wanted, and a new watch. I was thrilled. 
He was listening!
Then there was this little ring box. I was so excited. 
It was a ring that had a huge single rock but the rock was candy. 
That made me laugh like crazy.
He said, "I never got a photo of this but its big and simple so I thought you'd like it, it's cherry."
I did love it, it tasted great and I loved all my gifts. 

Several hours later he says, "Oh hey I forgot one of your gifts."  
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out another ring box. 
Now I'm figuring this must be cake, cookies or candy since those 3 are my favorite things. But no, it was the platinum pronged 3 stone gold anniversary ring that was put in his jewlery box over the last 10 years and it was enormous. 

I looked at him and said, "Is this real? Where did you get the money for this?" (translation: I didn't see any money missing from anywhere) 

He laughed and said, "Remember that bonus you bitched about for weeks that I didn't get? Hah- I got it and I just didn't deposit it. You were driving me nuts!"

OMG!  It was truly a surprise. I love this ring.  
But in all honesty it's too big. Back in the day those are words I never ever would have uttered. But I'm old now and it just doesn't matter to me in the same way. 
I don't wear it a great deal anymore because it is now also too big in  ring size as well as the size of the 3 stones.  I tend to bump things with it. But I do really really love it!

Now that was my last surprise and I believe it was 11 years ago.
I think I know what he has up his sleeve this year.
I don't want to say it here because that would be the only time he'd read my blog and then he'd change it. If it is what I think, I don't want him to make any changes.
Then again, I could be completely off on this hunch.
So next week I'll let you know if my hunch is correct.

Stay Tuned....


mama .bonnie said...

Hum, I'm married to the man who gave me Aspen for men cologne for mother's day one year. Said it was from the boys and that it smelled great :o/
I've learned to give him a picture, serial numbers, etc of what I would like or I could end up with another sweatshirt that looked like something my mother would have worn.....

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Bonnie that is a damn hoot!! I know what he got - at least i think I do...and i like it!! He read the hints well. :-)

flask said...

dear rick: when you buy regular items, get small amounts of cash back. rinse, lather, repeat.

you now have secret cash.

love, flask.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

flask i may have to delete that comment. :-) Peg

Ms. A said...

I'll be curious to hear if he took the hints and your hunch is correct. My guess is you are!

Carma Sez said...

ooooh man. Curious what the gift is. He and my Andy seem very similar at times, so I am a little worried.