My tulips have poked their heads out of the ground so I refuse to believe this.
It is damn cold (20) but I am in complete denial.
Sometimes it is a great place to live.
I seem to be the exact opposite of those girls who think they are fat and who are a size 4.
Yea, I know I need to lose some weight but I get dressed and think – Hey not looking bad! Then I see a photo and after a good cry I want to go to my friends Ben & Jerry and forget about it. So no more photos.
Godiva sent me a catalog. How the hell did they find me?
I don’t need a Godiva catalog! My God it’s orgasmic to browse through.
Right there on page 5 are these cupcakes to die for.
These damn cupcakes have Godiva chocolate ganache inside them for heaven’s sake!
They are $28.00 for 6. Half iced in buttercream and half in vanilla.
It says “it’s sure to delight youngsters"
Oh hell screw the youngsters.
$28.00 for 6 cupcakes you can bet your ass I am not giving them to some sticky fingered kid who would be just as thrilled with a Betty Crocker cupcake.
Sorry kids. But mommy needs these, this is adult food.
Honest to God I love this catalog.
Whoever sent this to me I honestly don’t know whether to kiss you or beat the living shit out of you.
I showed Rick the catalog and mentioned that my birthday was in 34 days and he may want to browse this catalog.
The truffles are on page 20 Rick....page is turned down to help you.
Yesterday after a long walk my dog decided to sit on my neighbors stoop.
Perhaps she was tired. I was and figured what the hell let’s sit here for a bit.
We had just walked 1.5 miles not as long as some days but why not sit and watch the world go by and be in the moment.
She loves that she is able to sit on the corner and just watch all the people going by.
The dog walkers in the neighborhood and of course her love of delivery men makes this the perfect spot. She was in heaven.
I think she could have spent a lot more time there but I had to go back to work so I had to drag her and I back in.
She was not happy being asked to leave her perch and I understand that more than the poor pup will ever know. I didn't want to go back to work either.
I bought my husband a stuffed chocolate lab puppy about 10 yrs ago.
He so wanted a dog and as I have said before we couldn’t have a dog because we traveled so much for work.
We had watched this television show that said a dog will lower your blood pressure.
I brought this home for Rick and he truly got a kick out of it. And what made me giggle was that Rick put it on his lap and would “pet” it while watching TV. (hey maybe that wasn't the dog he was petting....mmmmm)
But the poor stuffed dog has now been sitting in one of our guest bedrooms all alone for years. My nieces always played with it when they would visit but that is all the action Bubbaloo got. The other day while cleaning that room I decided to give it to Izzy.
Rick told me that ole Bubbaloo would be ripped to shreds in no time.
I didn’t think so.
We were both right.
Izzy immediately took off the eyes, nose and mouth.
The stuffing is coming out from where she ripped off Bubbalo’s face.
But now she loves this thing. She sleeps with it downstairs and at night when we go up to bed she grabs it and brings it to her bed. If either one of us picks it up and remotely looks like we are giving this thing some lovin’ she goes nuts. A very jealous lass this Izzy.
Rick had to go to traffic court yesterday.
I’ll tell you why someday but that’s not the point today.
He called me whispering that this was a hoot here at the courthouse.
He said quietly that he was outside in the hall & that “I appear to be the only normal one.”
I asked if there were others on the phone in the hall where he was.
He said yes.
I said, “That is exactly what they are telling their loved ones too you know.”
When he got out of the courtroom he called to tell me that everything was dropped.
But he said the characters in there were right out of Night Court.
(If any of you are old enough to remember that TV show)
One gal was asked how she was pleading. Not guilty she said.
Apparently she was driving with a suspended license.
She told the judge that she didn’t know she had a suspended license.
The judge asked her if she remembered mailing her license to the courts.
She said yes she did.
The judge asked, “What did you think that meant?”
She said, “I thought you were just taking it away for awhile and would be sending it back I didn’t think it meant I couldn’t drive?”
Rick said no one laughed and it was of course cracking him up.
Poor thing got a couple days in jail because apparently she was on parole for something.
Rick said one was funnier than the other (or sadder depending on your point of view).
He said that he could never be that judge each and every day and listen to the lies, the stupidity and the excuses without flipping out on these people.
Guess that is why he isn’t a judge.