Thursday, February 23, 2017

Dysfunction Junction

Do you all remember School House Rocks?
While I was too old for this at the time I have sisters much younger than me who would have this on and I still remember these songs.

While Rick has been ill this past winter he would watch TV shows I find disturbing. When I walked into the room and saw on the television show Hot Bench and Dr Phil I would sing, "dysfunction junction, what's your function?"
You know just like this song. It makes him laugh. But he still watches this crap.

I don't care for shows where people scream at one another. You know like reality shows. I don't get their appeal. I saw a Hot Bench with the 3 judges who don't really listen to these people and then make a decision. What is wrong that you think you need TV justice? Some of these shows make me so uncomfortable.

This one I liked.

Tuesday, February 21, 2017


Did you hear about the teacher who did a cartwheel in front of her choir class?
She was fired. Before you gasp, realize that she did not have on any underwear.

At first, I had a hearty laugh. What an idiot.
She told her students to delete the video.
Yea, that's like telling me not to touch that glass of red wine you just put in front of me. Those kids couldn't get that video uploaded fast enough.

She was fired, imagine that!
But I don't think she should have been fired for indecent exposure.
I think she should have been fired for having poor or terrible judgment.
I mean as a teacher you would hope he/she would have good judgment for heaven's sake.

And don't even tell me she forgot she went commando that day.
I mean one would remember if wearing a dress, the breeze going up your skirt will remind you.  Going commando in a dress is always a daring adventure, but doing a cartwheel in front of the class is just stupid.

I have to say the things that my teachers did in school were so boring in comparison. I did have a teacher who kept saying boner. George Washington pulled a boner. A kid sitting next to me, Scott, laughed and I laughed and then Scott commented when she said it several more times and that really made me giggle. We then were sent to the guidance counselor's office. When he asked what was so funny, Scott told him.  The guidance counselor never said anything else. He stood up and told us to go to our next class. He just kept his head down. I am sure he was fighting the laughter too.  

Friday, February 17, 2017

Want a Rib?

I've been reading all my baseball blogs and baseball sites.
This really caught my eye. 
A pitcher named Phil Hughes was struggling last year. 
He used to pitch on my favorite team but now he's with the Minnesota Twins.

Last year he struggled with pain, an injury and a lousy ERA.
It was discovered that he had what is called thoracic outlet syndrome. 

I know this only because I saw that he said his rib was removed and he has it in a jar of fluid at home. I immediately went to the link I shared above to read if that were true. He wants to do something with his rib. Eewww.

Of course, I had to search google for thoracic outlet syndrome. They only remove your rib as the last result of nothing else working. Here is what I saw online 

Thoracic outlet syndrome affects the space between the collarbone and first rib (thoracic outlet). Common causes include trauma, repetitive injuries, pregnancy, and anatomical defects, such as having an extra rib.
Symptoms include pain in the shoulders and neck and numbness, weakness, and coldness in the fingers.
Treatment involves physical therapy and pain relief. In rare cases, surgery may be needed to relieve the compression.
Now I probably would do the same to relieve nerve pain. I know when I had a herniated disc pressing on the nerves I would have confessed to war crimes I never committed. So I get it. But I am not sure I'd have kept anything if allowed. 
My sister Stephanie would keep it! She is funny like that. She and my first husband would watch surgeries together. She was 14 - 15 when my father had surgery on an anal fissure. She asked my father to see the scar and incision. He and my mom were horrified. They knew it was all innocent and that she just loves this stuff but that was crossing the line. She was so innocent about it all I found it funny. I remember her telling me that mom and dad don't get it. I don't care about daddy's hiney I just want to see what they did. I was 22-23 at the time and she came to visit me and share this story. I laughed knowing full well she was serious and not a pervert but it was so funny that she would even think to ask. Each time someone had stitches or any type surgery she wants to see it all. She is a teacher and I feel she should have been in the medical field because she loves all the gore and is fascinated by all the stuff the rest of us are squeamish about. When I had my back operated on the 2nd time we were roommates. She had to see the scar, touch the scar, viewed all the photos, asked me a ton of questions that only a doctor could answer. One appointment before my surgery I asked her to go with me because I know she would love hearing all this stuff from the doctor. Oh she asked questions and she was so in her element.  Why she is a teacher of 4th graders I'll never know. 
Two years ago she had to have open heart surgery. I asked her some of the crazy things she would ask me and she laughed and told me it hurt to laugh, wait until I'm better.
This story of the rib would have her enthralled. I may have to send her the link. She will then read all about this surgery and find videos and watch them. Yes, this is my sick little sister. 

Thursday, February 16, 2017

Random Things Floating In My Head

Baseball is just around the corner. Spring training has begun. YIPEE.
That means spring right?

We are about to experience a wonderful heat wave beginning on Saturday for about a week. Perhaps I should rephrase that, we are about to enter a warming trend. 65 - 68 degrees does not qualify as a heat wave now is it?

Compared to these high winds and 30's around here it will sure be nice.
The weather gal this morning couldn't just stop at a warming trend.
Oh no, the wench had to then tell us she expected March to be colder than February.  I didn't need that after the nice things she said. She should have just stopped at the great upcoming week. Let that sit in for a bit before she hammers us with the bad news.
I changed the channel. I did not wish to hear this.
I figured if I can stick my head in the sand with the news and politics why can't I do that for this weather gal?

I had a man ask me yesterday what the difference was between $250 and $395.

I said $145 and I giggled. I knew what he wanted but ...
He said, "young lady do you think that is funny?"
I almost said, "thank you for calling me, young lady"
Instead, I said I was sorry, yes I did and the difference is... and he cut me off before I could explain.
He was now laughing and said, "oh I was trying to bust your balls but it didn't work you said you did think it was funny - good for you."
Whew. I did then explain the difference of the scope of a repair vs a full restoration on the sink.
Thank God for that rare customer who you can have fun with.

Every day when I leave my office and just want to unwind before beginning dinner I turn on The Chew which I recorded. The last few days have been that Orange Imbecile in charge and I miss The Chew. Just another reason for me to hate the man. Liar, liar, pants on fire.


Here's some fun news I read. The World Health Organization classifies cell phone radiation as a class B Carcinogen. (asbestos is a class B carcinogen) Some other tidbits in the article say that recent evidence identifies strong cell phone-cancer link.  This particular piece of information was a bit alarming to me. Last year, a research group reported a sharp increase in the incidence of parotid gland tumors over the last 30 years, with the steepest increase happening after 2001. Your parotid gland is a type of salivary gland, located closest to your cheek – the same area where most people typically hold their cell phones. The researchers found a four-fold increase in parotid gland cancers from 1970 to 2006, while rates of other salivary gland cancers remained stable.

Now I always put my cell in my bra when walking the dog or when not with a purse. Sometimes under my boob in my bra. I have always used the bra for a storage unit but none that are known to cause cancer except my cell. I don't think I'll be doing that anymore. 


Would you exercise for one hour if it gave you enough free electricity for 24 hrs? Check this out.  I would do this in a heartbeat. Everyone in your home could take turns if you wanted to share the duties. I could use the exercise so I would do this for certain. 


Why can't they make a can opener that actually opens cans? We had a great one from 17 yrs ago from Pampered Chef. Worked like a charm until year 12. They changed the model and their new one sucks. I sent it back they sent me another that was as bad as the first so I sent it back again. I have been to restaurant supply stores, I have purchased expensive and cheap and none open cans completely. I even bought one I saw on TV that was supposed to be so good. I fell for it and it too sucked and could not open a can. 
Rick had a meltdown yesterday opening a huge can of beans for our dog. After going through our 3 can openers he used a knife to finish up. None cut completely. All leave areas of attachment.  He was livid. He threw them all out so now I have nothing to open a can. I don't have many cans of food, olives, Izzy's green beans, and canned tomatoes. I don't even eat soups from a can so not many cans to open but it is enough to be so damn annoying. We can put a man on the moon, make cell phones, cars that drive and park themselves but we can't make a friggin' can opener that really opens a can completely all the way around the damn can.  I bought olives the other day because it had a lift tab, they were more expensive but I just didn't care. I wouldn't end up throwing the damn can across the room. Do you have a can opener that is a never fail? If so please share with me the brand. Help!


With Rick not being as well as normal, we have watched a lot of television this year. One cold and windy Sunday we found ourselves making lunch and sitting down and chatting.  I decided to do some laundry and Rick turned on the tube.

He began watching a show on TBS. On this particularly cold Sunday, there were repeating all of Season 1 of this show. I came back into the room and sat with Rick and watched this silly show. It was like a wreck, you shouldn't look but you do. I baked him some cookies, I made some soup all while watching this show. It was not something that I had to focus on 100%. It made me laugh at times and while it wasn't something I would say was great TV it was oddly funny.

We ended up watching all of Season 1. The show is coming back on and Rick hit the DVR to record the new shows. I laughed when he said he couldn't wait for the new shows. Gee, I didn't think it was that good. The show is called Detour.
Have you seen it? Not must watch TV to me but Rick found it amusing.
Currently, he and I both are hooked on Imposters. 

My insomnia is back. Well, it is always back when I am stressed. 
In the wee hours of the morning, I have been watching things that I know Rick would never watch with me on Netflix. I watched the full season of The Crown. Thank God for subtitles. (I have such issues with the accent.) 

I found Prince Philip to be a petulant brat and the actor who played him would keep his head lowered and his eyes up. It reminded me of Lurch from The Adams Family. He creeped me out!  I found this show so interesting on so many levels. 
I don't get this whole royalty thing and I surely would not like it one bit. 
And heaven knows I wouldn't want to be part of a royal family!
The money sure would be great, the rest would be just awful.  

Now I understand Princess Margaret's drinking and death so much more. 
Being American I don't pay close attention to all of the royals comings and going. I found all of Princess Margaret's family issues incredibly sad and so avoidable. I wonder how much of this is true or artistic liberties.

After that was over I continued my Royal Family binge with the movie Diana with Naomi Watts playing Princess Diana. WOW. That was all new to me. To me, she played into her own death which is so damn sad. She had contacted paparazzi to get photos of her with Dodi to make the man she was in love with jealous. She was with this heart surgeon for years and after they split she wanted him back desperately. She found making him jealous worked before so she did it again. So the paparazzi knew where she was now and that began the chase. And we all know what happened after that. 

Now we don't know that this film is accurate either but it was surely eye opening for this American who really knew nothing about her relationship with the heart surgeon for years or her manipulation of the paparazzi. Was it a good movie? Oh no, it was not, but interesting.  Having insomnia it was something to watch.

What did we all do before Netflix and Prime? Hell, I remember the days of 3 channels, aluminum foil on the rabbit ears and the American Indian at the end of the television viewing hours. I guess when folks had insomnia back in those days they just read a book, didn't they?  I really should do that instead of knitting and watching television.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Some Funnies

My Uncle sent me some funnies that I thought I would share on my quest of no politics.

Yes, this is gross. Knee highs and diaper thong. Note the old guys two different shoes.

 Ah, ladies wouldn't it be fun to have glasses really do this?

 This tattoo funny made me howl. I remember telling a young person to be careful what they tattoo and where. She wanted a flower on her breast. I told her that flower will wilt someday so be careful. 
She didn't end up putting it there. Good call. 

I love this one! I can see this happening to me and Rick!
 I was only 14 when Woodstock was happening. 
But this is sadly still very much me. That's Rick sleeping in the chair. Thankfully neither of us have to put our teeth in a glass as he did below.
And just because.


You can tell what is happening in my life by the chaos on my desk and in my office.
If you find it neat as a pin and everything in its place then I am happy as shit.
If you find it complete and utter chaos of papers and files not where they should be I'm in a funk. My house doesn't get like this, just my office Weird phenomenon. 

My husband walked in eyed the room and said, "Perhaps you need to go outside and walk away for a bit"  He thinks a walk will help this funk?  
I think not.

He is still very sick. I have been stress eating. He has been ill since December. I've been a bit stressed about his health and a myriad of issues going on here. Oh, so not good. 

I come to my office every morning and move things around and deal with customers. It takes all I have not to tell people how stupid they are. My goodness, a woman on Tuesday was whining like a 3-year-old about a chip. 
A friggin' chip in her tub. It takes 5 minutes to repair. You will never see it. I go over all of this with her. She continues to whine. I am not exaggerating when I say whining. Loud to boot. I am thinking that if this is what her biggest issues is then by God woman shut up and be happy.   

She asks how it is done. Like she will understand, but I tell her. Then I tell her if she is not 100% happy we will remove the repair and she won't even have to pay us for our time. She then whines some more and says, (please read in sing-songy whine voice of 3 yr old) But what if I don't like it then what am I to do?
Instead of saying I don't f-ing care I say nothing. Because how the hell do you answer that? I already told her she would be no worse off if we try.

I go on to explain that we repair the damage done to fixtures on the showroom floor for Ferguson's. They are under the bright lights of the showroom and no one can see them. Then she says, "ooh why do they do that?" Whining of course. 
I tell her in transport these big ticket items can get damaged or chipped and they can't always return them or sell them so they put them on the floor as display and we go in before or after hours and repair them so no one can see the damage. 
She proceeded to whine, "But what if I can see it?"
Then we will remove it and you don't have to pay. You will be no worse off than you are now, or back to square one. 
"But no one else in town does this I have called everywhere"
"Well, isn't it good you found someone who does then?"
"Oooh, I don't know this is soooo difficult"  Bigger whine here.

Again I want to scream. Difficult? Really? It's a small chip the size of a dime in your guest bathroom. This is not a reason to whine and go on like this is something serious like cancer? Holy shit woman!

She then decides she needs to send a photo and have my "boss" see it and respond.  Rick views it, asks,"didn't you tell her the cost? This is pretty standard stuff."  Yep, I did but she wouldn't take my word for it and Rick, she whined her whole conversation. She annoyed me to death so I put this on your lap now.

Rick laughs. He thinks I'm kidding. He calls her. She whined the whole time and he had to mute the phone because he was laughing at her.
Of course, we are sending Gary there to fix it. Poor Gary. She is going to drive him batshit mad for this 5-minute repair. They always do. Gary's child doesn't even whine like this. I know when this one is completed he will call me as he gets in his truck telling me how she whined like a baby and we will laugh together. That helps us both. 

Some days...

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Valentines Day

I don't do Valentines. I find it a weird holiday once you're a grown-up.
But if that is your thing, then go for it and enjoy.
I do remember as a little girl in school writing all my Valentines for my class. One year the boy I thought was so dreamy gave me a special one with lots and lots of sparkles. Oooh, I was hooked then. 💘

Now I feel it is like New Year's Eve.
All this anticipation and pressure to do something fun, get something from someone, make it special damn it etc.
I just don't care.

I am an old fart about Valentines and honestly, I have been since I was 20 I have seriously felt this way. To me, it's a hallmark holiday. If a man is into me, he will spoil me other times of the year because he wants to, not because he has to. Thankfully I have a guy like that. He buys me flowers and candy for no reason. Tastes better and the flowers are prettier. I told Rick last week after a commercial, "I  don't need no stinkin' anything for VD"  He laughed and said, "good thing, we're broke." Sadly so true and it works out just fine.

Last Saturday we were watching a Netflix show (that was awful by the way) and I was having a glass of wine. I whined, "I wish you had a piece of chocolate. Any Rick? Hidden somewhere?"  I was jonesing for some chocolate. Knowing full well he did not but I needed to whine. He said, Perhaps I do and got up. I was like a 12 yr old girl all excited and surprised.  He got up and went to the coat closet. Weird I thought. He came out with 2 Hershey kisses and a mini bar of chocolate. I asked where he got these from. He told me out of his coat pocket. Oh, you ass, let me rephrase that, why do you have these in your coat pocket? He told me they were on the counter at doggy day care to take and he grabbed a couple so the next time you would whine about "needing" a piece of chocolate I would surprise you. Thank you, Rick and Doggy Day Care. I was so happy I shared.  Yea, I don't even like to share my chocolate. 😍

See now isn't that better than expecting it on VDay?

Thursday, February 9, 2017

Flashback Thursday

I am going back into the vault for Flashback Thursday to 2011.
At the time of writing this, I didn't think this incident happened on purpose. But now I do. Seeing how often older women and men do this type of thing when we are at their home used to shock me and I'd just think it was an accident. Now I know it's too many to be happening by "accident" these women and men do this on purpose. Nut jobs. What I find funniest about it all is that Gary, William, and Rick complain it is never a young hot 'thang'. Normally men or older women. 
 Ah, too bad fellas. 

Tuesday, February 7, 2017


Saturday I am meeting two women who I have not seen in 11 years.
I was 49 and the company we three worked for was about to undergo an enormous transition that we had no idea would change the course of all of our lives.

One of the young women was just 31 and the other 32 when we all met.
I was the old fart at 43 1/2 on the day I started. Both women lived in Maryland. One was sales as I was and the other (32) was service and support. They all belonged to the DC/Northern VA office. I lived in NoVa but worked from the NYC office. (thank God!)

I met these 2 women because I had the luxury of using the NoVa office from time to time. They were fun and always included me in their happy hours etc on the days I worked from home. So a friendship was formed.
We had some fun travel experiences, work experiences and God knows a night in Manhattan we will always remember!

When the company was at the very beginning of being taken over they both lost their jobs first. Oh boy, the tears and fears. I was the one who I thought was lucky and got to stay. Boy, was I ever wrong. They left with their pensions intact and a severance package. The next 1,500 of us got a swift kick in the ass and it made headlines like Enron. It sucked!

In the meantime over the years there were marriages and babies, then a divorce and a move to New Jersey. Now we only keep in touch via email and Facebook.
I had a baby shower for the one who moved to New Jersey and to see that he is now driving put how much time has gone by in perspective.

Out of the blue Miss New Jersey wrote and said she'd be coming to town (well not my town, but Maryland, 32 miles) and her dates were flexible so let's all do brunch. So we found a weekend we all could agree upon. This Saturday is the date.

Unfortunately for me, I have to drive up to Potomac Marland for the date.
Which means no mimosa's for me unless I do as they suggested and go home with them for awhile. That made me laugh and realize that we may be old now but nothing has changed.

I did remind them that while they are still in their 40's albeit late 40's, I am an old bat now who they may not recognize.
I was 49 the last time they saw me. Damn.
My breasts were still in the original spot God put them, my ass was still up and not tired and laying on my thighs. My skin was so much better and there were no jowls or turkey neck. But then the decade of one's 50's came and all the damn changes occurred. Bad enough losing your dream job where they also took my pension and retirement but now my body and face were hijacked. Give a girl a break!

This should be fun once we are all over the shock of what we (I) look like today. Catching up, showing pictures, talking about the days before the old company changed our lives forever. It was fun while it lasted. The laughs, the conferences, the travel and most of all the bonding over the shittiest boss known to mankind.

We all agree on one thing, none of us would have imaged we would be where we are right now across the board. This should make for a fun and interesting Saturday. I bet it will feel like 2006 all over again!

Monday, February 6, 2017


Been out of the loop due to medication for my knee.
Damn knee still barking a bit and I still can't kneel.
Went to see Dr. Tall Tan and Gorgeous for my follow up and was given an
anti-inflammatory to reduce pain.
Guess what it did? Made me sick and swollen. But my knee felt better even though it was now double its usual size.

Day 1 - took the new pill. Day 1 evening not feeling well at all.
A plethora of things happening. I couldn't figure it out. Yes, I'm slow.

Day 2 -took the new pill. Day 2 evening really really not feeling well and even more things symptoms.
I say to Rick, "I feel like I've been glutened" Yes that is a verb in my home.
He said, "What did you eat?"  Nothing but real food and nothing with gluten.
So we go over my last week and then Eureka I realize I've added a new pill.

The pharmacists have on my record that I have Celiac Disease.
They couldn't possibly give me a Rx that has wheat for a binder.  Yea right.
So I look up ingredients on the internet for my generic drug. Sure enough.
I felt I needed to call the pharmacy to be sure it was the same ingredients so I did just that. I thought if it were a different manufacturer than what I was reading online it may not be why I feel this way.
The pharmacist read everything to me and then she stopped before she said wheat. I said to her, "It says wheat next right?"  She said, "oops sorry. It can't be that bad can it?" (giggles)  Really you just said that to me?

I can't get my feet in a shoe, my rings on my finger or my ass in my pants. I have severe pain in my stomach and can't be far from a bathroom. I have hives all over me. Gee, an apology does it. Thankfully I only took 2 pills before things went off the charts! If I had taken it for a week I'd be in the hospital or worse.

You spend years trying to get a healthy gut and then this woman cavalierly says "Oops, sorry" and giggles.

Today I am cranky and hurting. Aren't you glad you stopped by?

The good news is it feels like spring and it's so nice outside! I went out at lunch and Izzy and I enjoyed our walk in spring like weather. (66 degrees)

Thursday, February 2, 2017

Izzy, Reporting for Blog Duty Today

Izzy The Wonder Dog Here.
Mom is swamped so I am taking over for her. In case you forgot this is my pretty little face. Yes, I'm wet here. I'm always wet. I go in water almost every day. Don't you?

Boy did we have a fun night last night.
First allow me to explain what my mom bought me.
You see in the early mornings when we are walking no one can see us.
Mom wears a navy coat and I have a dark brown coat.
So at 4:30 or 5:00 in the morning when we are walking in the neighborhood we apparently are difficult to see.

One morning mom had me on the leash, which she doesn't do all the time thank goodness. That morning as we were rounding the corner a car almost came up the curb going to so fast to throw the newspaper. Not only did he startled us but the driver was startled to see us at 4:30 in the morning too. He rolled down his window and apologized profusely. Mom just nodded and muttered something and we walked home.

This happened again a couple of weeks later. This time mom had some choice words for this newspaper man to not drive so fast and try not running people off the sidewalk. He kept saying that she and her dark dog were hard to see. What are we doing out at that early hour anyway? Hey we were on the sidewalk, he shouldn't be there with a car.  I wanted to take a bite out of him but mom pulled me away. I've never bitten anyone before but this guy just seemed to have it coming and I was ready to try this biting thing right then if she hadn't made me move away.  I could go full Cujo on his ass. I know everyone thinks I am a mild mannered girl, but this dim wit almost killed my mom. I may not like her as much as my Dad but she is still a part of my pack. Besides she makes me cooked carrots every day for treats. She is good for something.

Well, these two incidents apparently got my mom all worked up. She kept saying she was not buying a fluorescent coat but perhaps she needs something like the joggers use that blink or light up. That started her search.

So now I have to wear this stupid collar at night and in the morning when I go out. It looks like this one below. The LED light is either solid or it blinks two ways. Your choice. I hate the blinker and I made that known in no uncertain terms. I put my paw down. No to the blinking lights. I'm not a disco for heaven's sake. So the solid light it is.  Oh, how I must train these humans.
This is what I look like at night wearing a LED collar only mine is green like the picture above. Can't see my pal below can you? Yep, that was my Mom's issue with me being hurt. She is very over protective but like I said, she spoils me so I tolerate her.
Now, this brings me to last night. Dad, Mom and I went for our evening walk.
On went the collar over my regular collar. I like to go into the woods near our home to do my business and most times Dad and Mom will wait for me outside of the woods. I hear them chatting so I know they are there and I can do what I need to do.

I am looking for that perfect spot to leave my poo and I hear some young females screaming on the other side of the wooded area of my parents. 
I stop. Dad begins to walk towards them to ask if they were okay.
One of them begins to point to something in the woods and is hysterical.
She is screaming, "Oh my God there is something glowing in the woods - LOOK!"
The other one grabs her phone at the same time and asks, "Should I call the sheriff or my dad? Oh my God, OMG, what is it?!"  
Now I can't poop with all this screaming. What is wrong with these girls? 
I walk further into the woods. Now she is screaming, "Its moving, hurry!!"

My Dad and Mom are now near them and I hear Dad say, "It is just our dog, it's not an alien, calm down girls."  Mom has now gone right up to them and told them about my new collar. They were teens and so scared Mom said. She said they watch too many scary movies. They calmed down, embarrassed and made a semi-laugh. They walked into their house saying good night.
Finally, they stopped screaming and I could poop in peace.
I found my perfect spot and then ran out of the woods to my Dad and Mom who were really laughing at these girls now. My mom said she didn't want to laugh in their face, they were sincerely frightened but she was sure laughing with Dad now.

I was hoping that this would mean I didn't have to wear this dumb thing.
But that seemed to convince them even more that I needed it. 
Apparently, me walking in the woods and making noise on the leaves would have had those girls even more hysterical if they could not see the beast they were hearing. Even saying that made my Dad laugh.  
I am such a wimp, so calling me the beast is pretty funny.
Dad hasn't laughed like this since the wind made the flag make a flapping noise and I jumped and ran behind him.

Now the dumb man who throws newspapers on people's cars, sidewalks and anywhere other than their stoop waves to me and mom in the morning and we notice he isn't driving like a drunk madman anymore.
Looks like I will have to wear this damn thing for awhile now.
On a positive note, perhaps I can scare Oscar, I hate that damn cat! Hmm.....

Tuesday, January 31, 2017


I disabled my facebook account. When someone asked me where I went I told them living here in the real world. 

I found it was sucking my soul. Besides the obvious trump bullshit that made my blood boil I just had to walk away. I walked away from the news and now facebook. You'd think that would stop me from knowing what is going on. Sadly that isn't so. My husband likes to keep me informed even when I put my two hands over my ears. He's helpful like that.

Facebook makes me vomit at times. Ah, look at me I'm doing this. Hey, look at my wife and kids because I am a good family man....who is cheating on that beautiful wife. Hey look at me I'm having a perfect life, perfect kids and my home is also perfect. Insert vomit.
If only they all lived like their facebook accounts say they do. Mine is ugly, messy and just like here, my life. I don't have a perfect anything!

Right now I am dealing with a step mom who is losing it. My father is being cared for by her and as you all know he has dementia. I spoke to her on Sunday. (she is 74) She told me that Carol was going to retire after this year. We went on to discuss why she is doing this now and Carol's trip to Florida etc. Then after I mentioned that she may wish to move to Florida since all of her children have moved there she said, "Hey did you know that Carol is going to retire after this year?"
Oh my goodness, here we go again. She has been doing this a great deal and she is scaring me.

After my father dies who will care for my step mother? Getting her to leave that big house that is falling down around her has been a big bone of contention for us all. We have tried to get her to downsize. But she won't. So now she will need assisted living from the looks of things after Dad passes. And if I were being honest with you I am doubtful that he will live past this year. So what do we do with mom? She can live alone if someone is nearby - like next door. And only for a short time. 

I have asked her to move here and she has said no many many times. 
I give up on it. I also get that while I am her "daughter" she married my father and I was part of the package deal.  Her daughter, her firstborn is out west. She keeps telling me she doesn't want to go there because all of her friends are "here" where she lives. But she has no friends so I don't know who these people are. When you ask her she laughs.

I tend to get stuck with all family issues, be it financial support, emotional support, etc. I have been the go-to for them all of my life. But now I would like all sisters to step up. In particular my step mom's oldest daughter. She has gotten off the hook for years because she was out west and she had her own family. Yes, for some reason because I didn't have my own children everyone thinks I should do it then. I just can't financially right now take this on my own. We all need to step up to the plate and figure out a fair way of taking care of mom. I recently suggested we have a meeting and figure it all out. I am fearful of what this will all become.

See it just sucks to get older. I want to be a kid some days and have no responsibilities or to worry about anything other than getting a good grade in Algebra. Which I might add never happened, If it weren't for math I would have had straight A's. Damn math!


I have written a few times here about Mary Tyler Moore.
I watch the Dick Van Dyke show on weekends. 
Yes, I've seen them a million times. Yes, I know the dialog. 
But it makes me happy. Just like I love Lucy does.

But my favorite as you all know is The Mary Tyler Moore show.
I have all seasons on my DVR. I watch them when there is nothing else I wish to view. I watch them over and over again. (sundance channel Friday all morning long) 

My husband asked me once why this show was so pivotal for me.
Then he asked again last week after she passed, There were many shows where woman were having conversations about about how she impacted them. It's a character he kept saying. How could that have impacted you?
Ah, but to me, a character of the likes this young woman had never seen before in 1970.

There were 2 shows for me that changed how I thought my life could be.
I knew I wanted more than what my father said I could have.
That Girl and Mary Tyler Moore. That Girl had her own apartment and had a job. She made friends in her new life and had a boyfriend and God knows great clothes. :-)  I lived vicariously through her even though I was a 10 - 15 yr during that run. Oh but I remember it so well. Her father would sneak around and watch her to be sure she was safe or "behaving" Oooh, I knew that father. As I got older that show lost something because it wasn't ringing true anymore. But I think that is about the time it went off the air. They had nowhere else to go with her and living or sleeping with Donald wasn't going to happen on TV in 1970.

As I grew up it was then Mary Tyler Moore. (14-21)
By this time I was really having a rebellious stage with my father.
To him, the only thing for a young woman to do was to be a nun or get married and pound out babies. I heard those 2 choices my whole friggin' life.  I wanted none of that. When I talked about college, he would say that he would just be paying for me to find a husband. Yes, my father was that old school, off the boat, kind of man. Backward is an understatement.

I have written here how I went to my guidance counselor about college and what my chosen profession would be. I was so excited about how it matched the results of the test the guidance counselor had given me. My parents were called in and I had to listen to how I couldn't do this as a female from my parents and this ass of a guidance counselor.  My father "put his foot down" and refused to pay for college if this is what I would be wasting his money on. My step mom sat there and went along with him. To this day I can't wrap my head around that since she was only 14 yrs older than me. Why didn't she speak up and help me, my mom would have! I digress. 

Mary Tyler Moore was doing something I wished to be doing. Working in a predominately male field, living on her own, succeeding and wearing pants. Hell, when this show was on television we couldn't even wear pants to high school.
So when my husband said why is that a big deal I realized he doesn't understand because he is a white male. He has never had to defend how smart he is, how hard of a worker he is, how much he can do the job, never was treated less than because of his gender, or even was doubted for one minute that he was capable. He was never told a job he may have wanted was not appropriate for him because it wasn't on the list of what he was allowed to do by society. Even back then my mom had a gay hairdresser. He was able to do what he wanted. (I am sure he suffered in other ways but being male he was surely able to do hair which was a job my father thought was for women) Never would it occur to him that he couldn't do whatever he wanted to do in life, period. (job wise) He has never had to fight for the same amount of money as his peers, he was probably leading the charge in that area.

There is an episode where Mary finds out that a male counterpart is making $50 more dollars a week than she is. 
($320 is what that equals to today)
She asks Mr. Grant and he calmly tells her, "Well of course he is, he is a man" Exasperated she says, she has the same bills to pay, the same car to drive, insure etc. But he kept saying, "but you're a woman"
I again pointed out to Rick that at that time for that to be put out there in the universe was a damn big deal. Like listening to Archie Bunker talk about his racist views were a damn big deal. It got people talking, it got things changed. It wasn't fair or right. It needed to be discussed. They showed it with humor but boy it drove the point home.
It made me stand up to my father. That is why she was important to me, even though she wasn't even real.

Rick asked this question to me last week.
This morning over coffee he tells me that he was taken aback by my comment about never had to prove himself. He has been thinking about that a lot. He said he never thought of it in that way. Rick told me his first thought was, "I always have to prove myself. Then I realize it was to one up another guy and get the job (or to beat another white guy as you'd say). So I get what you mean now."
Rick feels he's very empathetic to others and their situations. (he is) But not having lived it does make it different, just like when we talk about adoption. He said, "you always tell me you can understand it only to a point but never fully because this is not your life or was your path. I get it now."

In my former career, Rick was my biggest cheerleader. Each promotion or award was a big deal to him as well as myself. He was always "atta girl" I couldn't be married to anyone who would give me less. But every once in a while it's fascinating to hear him talk about what he doesn't see if he is being honest. 
On a side note, The MTM show showed feminism without what I refer to as the screaming meanies. She was proud, point being made, not giving up and showing up. The loud ones tend to put people off, but they get things done! This show did it with humor and kindness all while pointing the fingers at the absurdities of how women are treated less than. We needed both styles at that time. Well we still do! 

I get the male pressure thing that I have learned from him over the years.
I didn't live it and over time when it frustrates me he has taught me how men are programmed as little boys. I get it we all have our shit.
But I told him that while they are programmed I still feel like they aren't so limited. They are allowed to shoot for the stars and the sky, they just can't cry.